Questions in the Human Relations category.
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January 7

Trouble managing anxiety around kid schooling decisions

Due to my own background I have a lot of difficult feelings about school, and they are rearing their head now that my own kids are school age. Therapy has not been helpful. I’m looking for guidelines and tips about how to manage these feelings in such a way that they do not damage my kids. Blizzard of snowflakes within. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 5:22 PM - 29 answers

Does it work to talk to friends about feeling blown off?

Sometimes I feel blown off by people who on a lot of other measures appear to be my friend. I get that sometimes life happens etc. and I try to be accommodating but I guess I just don't understand that kind of inconsistency as I feel like I'm a pretty consistent person myself. Does it work to talk to people about this sort of thing? Is communication key or will it just make things awkward? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 4:18 AM - 23 answers

January 6

Should I take the leap to live by myself or wait and save?

I can sort of afford to live by myself, but I'm hesitant for financial reasons. At the same time, living with roommates (in general) has induced several breakdowns. What should I do? Snowflake details inside. [more inside]
posted by adelaide at 5:28 PM - 32 answers

Getting Rid of a Crush

I have had a crush on a married colleague for about two months now. I’m normally good at diffusing crushes. I think it’s gone during the weekend and then I see him and I’m a high school girl all over again. So far (from his perspective), I’ve clearly tried to avoid any non professional or friendly interaction with him, even though he is really friendly to everyone and best friends with my boss. He must think I hate him a little and must mildly sense how nervous I get around him. [more inside]
posted by kinoeye at 12:40 PM - 26 answers

January 5

Keeping your cool when dating

I have gotten the runaround with dating this past year, and it's making me more anxious and neurotic when in the throes of new relationship energy than usual. How do I deal? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 9:03 PM - 14 answers

Should I let this one go?

Help me figure out whether I should text one more time or move on. [more inside]
posted by Amy93 at 5:26 PM - 22 answers

January 4

What is the state of online dating in 2019?

I would like to date. Well actually no I wouldn't, what I would like is to be happily partnered. However, dating would seem to be a prerequisite. How do I do it? [more inside]
posted by Anticipation Of A New Lover's Arrival, The at 6:00 PM - 14 answers

Welcome to America! Here’s a gift!

What to give? [more inside]
posted by rtodd at 5:29 PM - 14 answers

Halp! Holidays equals no alone time

I’m on a lovely long summer break. Four weeks off work which I so so looked forward to. And my partner has the same amount of time off. But I forgot how this can really stress me out and leave me irritable and cranky. [more inside]
posted by summerinwinter at 2:07 PM - 7 answers

Teens mentioned their dad's new GF -> I get flashbacks of his abuse

Please help me to continue to talk sense and calm to myself. I thought I was in a pretty good place mentally already, having escaped my neglectful, verbally abusive and financially exploiting ex-husband a few years ago. However, last week my older teen and young adult children exchanged some words that revealed that their bio-dad = my ex has a new woman in his life. I happened to overhear them (they did not intend that) and to my dismay I have fairly quickly descended into what feels like anxiety revving up towards a PTSD flare. [more inside]
posted by AthenaErdmann at 9:55 AM - 14 answers

I have the verbal communication skills of a crayon.

With certain people I’m not very comfortable with (which is pretty much anyone except for very close friends/family), I have a very hard time articulating my thoughts and ideas clearly and intelligently. I think it makes me come across as kind of dumb when I find it difficult to contribute to discussions. Should I work on this, or just own it? [more inside]
posted by koolaidnovel at 8:58 AM - 20 answers

January 2

Trying too hard, or not enough, wth new friends

How much “trying” do you do with new friends? How do you read how much they want to be friends with you? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 10:16 PM - 22 answers

Poly Parents

My partner and I are gradually exploring a new relationship with a third person, whom we are both dating. Do you know of resources to help us think about how this might impact our small child? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 10:39 AM - 12 answers

Should I check on these two neighbors?

My area is experiencing worse winter weather than usual (relatively speaking). I am wondering whether I should check on two neighbors who are acquaintances. One is disabled, and the other is elderly. [more inside]
posted by maurreen at 8:28 AM - 23 answers

January 1

How do you handle talking to difficult people when you're tired?

I've had the luxury of limiting my exposure to people I actually want to be around for a while. I'm now finding myself, occasionally, in the company of people I can't stand to be around. If you're more on the introverted side, what are you ways of handling being around these particular characters? [more inside]
posted by cotton dress sock at 3:21 PM - 22 answers

Help me feel at peace with my decision to keep my parents in my life

Choosing to actively build a cordial relationship now with my seriously abusive parents is making me SO FREAKIN FRUSTRATED with myself. Snowpocalypse inside. [more inside]
posted by MiraK at 11:47 AM - 22 answers

Supporting yourself & spouse who was abused by parents

My spouse and I have been together for more than 8 years, but it’s only in the last two years that he has shared with me that he was physically abused by his parents as a child. They interpreted his childhood ADHD as being "disobedience", hurting him for years with cords, paddles and fists to punish him for not being able to sit still, concentrate, or hold a pencil properly. If your loved one grew up in an abusive home, and visits these abusive homes/has a relationship with their parents as an adult, how do you support them, while also dealing with your own anger and disgust with your in-laws? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 6:32 AM - 10 answers

December 31, 2018

How to recognize loss at New Years Eve party

Our closest friends lost their son to a drug overdose in July. We will be spending New Years Eve with them tonight with a small group of friends/family. How can we recognize this loss tonight in a meaningful way? [more inside]
posted by hollygoheavy at 9:06 AM - 18 answers

December 30, 2018

How to handle noise complaint from neighbor?

We moved in about 6 months ago. A house one door away from us (so next door to our next door neighbor) has complained to us twice now about noise in the past few weeks. In itself this isn’t a problem since we would happily be quieter except we can’t figure out what the noise is. Complainant is unhelpful in describing it. How do we resolve this? [more inside]
posted by ElliotH at 7:28 PM - 17 answers

How can I make new friends that are extroverts?

All of my friends are introverts, and so are the vast majority of people I know. There is a lot of good advice out there on how to meet people, but I would like suggestions that will make it easier to meet extroverts, specifically. [more inside]
posted by chernoffhoeffding at 7:17 PM - 13 answers

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