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Long story short, I have to leave my boyfriend soon for my own sanity and emotional and mental health, though I am deeply reluctant, but I know I just have to soon. Is it my duty to tell him that I am really concerned for him? His life is a mess and I am seriously concerned and disturbed the more I think about it. [more inside]
posted by anon1129 at 9:01 PM - 51 answers

I am looking for written examples of what good people say when they have been pushed beyond what they can handle. Real-life and fiction are both okay. I am looking for something articulate and compelling and **righteously** angry, where the listener’s response is “Oh, I have gone too far!” Please don’t look in this thread if this kind of thing will bother you. [more inside]
posted by Vatnesine at 5:12 AM - 31 answers

I'm having the worst argument I've ever had with a friend. Details below - please tell me the truth. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 10:19 PM - 89 answers

I resent my friend’s intermittent ghosting, especially during bereavement. [more inside]
posted by BuffySummers at 5:35 AM - 18 answers

I work full time. My wife is unemployed, but trying to become employed. We are lesbians. While she is unemployed, she is doing basically all of the housework--not by agreement, but because she does most of it before I can get to it. I chip in on weekends. She is upset about being unemployed but not about doing all the housework. I have asked. Repeatedly. I feel guilty about doing approximately 10% of the housework. How do I... not? Should I be doing more? [more inside]
posted by bridgebury at 7:11 AM - 16 answers

I'm looking for a list of 'red flags' in teenage girl friendships. I'm getting texts from my daughter's best friend's mom saying that a third girl is trying to triangulate and push her daughter out. I think it's probably true, and my daughter is particular prone to befriending bullies and ending up in this dynamic. The only think I'm really comfortable doing about this is giving my daughter a list of things to be wary of in new friendships. Hopefully she can apply this to all relationships going forward. [more inside]
posted by kitcat at 12:50 PM - 13 answers

My neighbor opened up a small business in a storefront a few months ago near a high school and after school hours some teenagers are acting like assholes in front of it, and is at his wit's end, venting and complaining to me, and asked for suggestions. [more inside]
posted by fizzix at 2:18 PM - 40 answers

I have known this person for a while, and I am constantly frustrated by my inability to have a real conversation with them. All I get are a quick clever jokes, and I’m really tired of it. I try not to feed the jokes, but change the subject or not respond. I don’t know how to have a genuine conversation with them. I guess this is about trust and comfort, and I need to earn more. But at this point, I just don’t care to engage but briefly. And I’m afraid that might show.
posted by ebesan at 12:52 PM - 23 answers

We are first gen immigrants from an Asian country, though we’ve been in the US a while. I think we may be overcompensating when it comes to discipline with our child. This is partly due to fear that our child will resent us later or be scarred by our actions. How do you strike a balance? [more inside]
posted by redlines at 9:42 AM - 11 answers

My five year old daughter is easy going most of the time, but explodes in anger and frustration in certain situations. I am reading the parenting books and lurking on the parenting forums, but what I want to know is, if YOU were temperamentally disposed to anger as child, what helped you overcome it, or what help do you wish you had? [more inside]
posted by redlines at 9:03 AM - 13 answers

Looking for practical tips on managing communication and getting through this. Small children are involved. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 9:16 PM - 6 answers

A friend was in a software upgrade meeting with a vendor, and the vendor said "we'll be done by Saturday, and should be legs in the air on Sunday. (Sunday was an extra day in case there were issues with the upgrade on Saturday). We can't find anything through search that seems like an explanation, so I turn to you, hive mind. What does this mean?
posted by Gorgik at 8:49 PM - 29 answers

We're in our 50s and have pets but no children. I earn enough money for both of us to have a comfortable lifestyle. My spouse was in a low-paid, stressful job that required working shifts, damaging spouse's health and interfering with the time we could spend together. Following a scare that included spouse being diagnosed with diabetes and very high blood pressure, we decided spouse would stop working and I'd be the sole earner. In ten years we'll have enough for me to retire (I'll be 62). [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 2:01 PM - 51 answers

I’ve been living with my boyfriend for a year now, and we both work full-time. We live in the suburbs with my two dogs, and I handle most of the household chores—cooking, cleaning, shopping, and dog care. He sometimes helps, but not consistently, and it’s difficult for him to take initiative or deal with responsibilities like scheduling appointments. He’s admitted that he feels overwhelmed by all the duties, the dogs, and life in the suburbs, and while he wants to improve, he struggles with motivation and procrastinates, especially around things like driving and working out. [more inside]
posted by InisMona at 6:07 AM - 36 answers

What are some books – practical advice or philosophical reflection – about aging that have been helpful to you in navigating the process? [more inside]
posted by reedbird_hill at 7:07 PM - 10 answers

When I get envious of someone, I avoid them because they trigger painful feelings of inadequacy and resentment. It feels very uncomfortable. But some people seem to keep seeking out the objects of their envy, asking them to hang out, and stalking their social media. This can go on for years. Why are they proactively causing themselves pain like this? [more inside]
posted by sandwich at 1:58 PM - 16 answers

My father and a cousin have a great interest in family genealogy. They uncovered grand parents or great great grandparents who were first cousins and are now wondering about various anxiety issues we have, that strongly feature in the family, that they feel could be related. My son also has autism… and my father was wondering if it could be related. I’m inclined to think not, you have a lot of anxiety and autism around these days and these things were fairly common back then. Anyway, I saw a Reddit answer that said genetic issues from cousin marriages disappear after one generation, provided there aren’t more cousin marriages. Is there anyone here that can say or direct us to an article?
posted by anonymous at 6:04 AM - 19 answers

I've recently put two and two together and realized that my father is either mostly narcissistic or at least has some fairly strong narcissistic tendencies. I need book recommendations on how to navigate this. [more inside]
posted by tafetta, darling! at 2:12 PM - 9 answers

My friend moved away and comes back to visit only a couple times a year. Last time she was in town, we made plans to hang out and catch up. Instead, she canceled on me the day before and was evasive about it. She later admitted that she'd arranged a date with a new guy instead. I'm not cool with this and am reevaluating the friendship. Am I overreacting? Should I give her grace for this misstep after so many years of friendship? [more inside]
posted by keep it under cover at 5:58 PM - 33 answers

I'm a child-free person dating a person with a 6 year old. Looking for resources (books, websites, podcasts, etc) for this new chapter, not focused on integrating lives or households, just more navigating hard conversations or issues that might come up. [more inside]
posted by greta simone at 9:47 AM - 4 answers