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Popular Posts

Music to make your guests think you're cool

What are the coolest cats playing to soundtrack their lives and good times?
posted by mymbleth to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 22 at 4:42 AM
84 users marked this as a favorite

What kitchen/household objects SPARK JOY?!?

I'm moving into a new apartment, and I'm bringing very little with me, so I'll be restocking most small household objects, kitchenware, cookware, bathroom, etc. What are the things in these categories that you love having and are a step above the generic version of that object?
posted by mercredi to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 17 at 7:18 AM
76 users marked this as a favorite

"Dear God do I love this [iPhone] app" - iPhone apps that bring you joy?

As a recent convert, I'm looking for the iPhone apps that you absolutely adore.
posted by WCityMike to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 21 at 8:10 AM
74 users marked this as a favorite

Chatty History Recommendations

I'm stuck at home with a broken ankle and need some good book recommendations. I'm looking for history books that aren't stuffy and boring. I like reading books that are engaging and have conversational style of writing. I'm mainly after history (of anything) recommendations but if you have any other non fiction recommendations, please feel free to include them.
posted by poxandplague to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 16 at 7:41 PM
62 users marked this as a favorite

Slaws wanted

I want to make more cabbage slaws, but lack good recipes.
posted by Frowner to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 22 at 7:24 AM
53 users marked this as a favorite

If I like Tana French I will like _______

Looking for more women writers and/or books with women protagonists in the mystery/thriller/crime genres. Of course there's
posted by soundguy99 to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 17 at 11:59 AM
52 users marked this as a favorite

Please help me do math good again

I used to know a lot of math. That was well over a decade ago. I haven't used it since, and now I'm in a position where I need it again. Is there an online course or a textbook (or a couple textbooks) that will take me on a speed-run from pre-calc to differential equations/linear algebra? With exercises, and the exercises have worked-out answers?
posted by schroedinger to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 20 at 11:52 AM
40 users marked this as a favorite

How to *not* write a paper the day before it's due?

I'm a grad student (course based) and a pretty bad procrastinator who has finally come to the realization that, perhaps, it is not wise to begin writing my papers a handful of days before they are due. It adds so much unnecessary stress to my life! I have no idea how to write a paper over the course of a few weeks and not stress about it the night before it's due. How... do people do this?
posted by VirginiaPlain to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 19 at 6:21 AM
40 users marked this as a favorite

Best books about any/all aspects of modern cities

I'm a huge fan of cities, but I just realized that I know very little about them. What are the best books/longform articles about cities? Histories, cultural, technical, etc.
posted by miltthetank to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 17 at 10:49 AM
40 users marked this as a favorite

How do I become a more mindful reader

I have a reading challenge for 2019, with a lot of amazing titles and a renewed interest in visiting my local library. I'm close to finishing my third book of the year, but I keep finding myself wishing that I retained more than just nebulous good/bad feelings and a few memorable lines. How do I become the type of person who can formulate long, thorough reviews? What prompts/nudges can I build into my reading to help me remember more of a book's contents?
posted by erratic meatsack to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 17 at 5:12 PM
37 users marked this as a favorite

Tween feminist needs some girling tips

Two middle-aged lesbian moms have a kickass tween ladyhuman. We're old-school Queer-Nation-y hairy-legged birkenstockers, and she's... experimenting. With Girling. Totally appropriate. Totally not our scene. We're down with the self-expression but we can't help her. Can anyone point us to Youtube channels that teach the nuts and bolts of makeup and hair without the toxic femininity, or channels that help tween girls think critically about all that gender crap while still using makeup, hair stuff, and clothes as play/costumery?
posted by pomegranate to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 17 at 6:31 PM
36 users marked this as a favorite

I need CHEWY brownies!

Hello! I keep trying brownie recipes in an attempt to recreate my ideal brownie, as remembered from my youth. I haven’t found it yet and I’m getting tired of the wrong brownies. Please help! Specifics inside.
posted by Weeping_angel to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 21 at 2:10 PM
35 users marked this as a favorite

A small step up in women's clothing

I am looking for recommendations for well made, semi-inexpensive clothing. I was really surprised by how much nicer amazon essentials t-shirts were than my Target woman's t-shirt staples. I am looking for similar swaps.
posted by Kalmya to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 20 at 5:42 PM
35 users marked this as a favorite

Mythology for Dummies

I recently read Circe by Madeline Miller, and I realized I have a huge knowledge gap when it comes to Greek and Roman mythology. I know almost nothing. Please help me get up to speed!
posted by bonheur to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 21 at 6:25 PM
35 users marked this as a favorite

Seriously hydrating lotion that leaves ZERO residue

My hands get so dry and scaly and cracked in the winter, but I cannot STAND any feeling of lotion on my skin so I don't use it until it gets REALLY bad, and then only at bedtime so I am asleep while I have it on. Lotion really helps but especially in this age of touchscreens and keyboards, can you tell me how I can keep my hands moisturized without having to wash my electronics every day?
posted by rabbitrabbit to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 18 at 11:09 AM
27 users marked this as a favorite

And don't you like me for me?

How do you figure out if you like somebody before trying to get them to love you?
posted by Sock Meets Body to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 20 at 6:03 PM
27 users marked this as a favorite

Stepping outside of comfort zone versus doing things I don't want to

How do you know whether you're doing something good by stepping out of your comfort zone, or whether you're just forcing yourself into doing things you get no enjoyment out of?
posted by iamsuper to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 19 at 8:41 AM
26 users marked this as a favorite

Me, I disconnect from you

I can’t use the internet in moderation, but it is functionally impossible to cut myself off entirely. Is there anything I can do to improve my situation here? I’m very open to tech solutions, if they aren’t easily defeated.
posted by shapes that haunt the dusk to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 18 at 3:24 AM
25 users marked this as a favorite

Look and see her, how she sparkles

I would like to read some fantasy novels (ideally aimed at adults) that feature unicorns or dragons as characters, rather than cool-but-not-sapient horses/lizards. Protagonists, antagonists, or support characters are all good, so long as they're prominently featured. Other snowflake details below.
posted by darchildre to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 20 at 5:30 PM
25 users marked this as a favorite

Car buying 101

I am likely going to be getting a new-to-me car in a few months when I graduate medical school and start my residency. I’ve never done this before; all my previous vehicles have been purchased by or from family members. What resources can I use to figure out which car I want, and how can I get the best value for money? How can I figure out which cars have features I like? What’s the deal with leasing—is it ever a good idea?
posted by ocherdraco to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 18 at 8:54 PM
24 users marked this as a favorite

Posts

Popular Comments

Honestly, I think you were in the wrong and should apologize. She asked “do you think I have ENOUGH pillows?” not “what do you think of my pillow habit?” The appropriate response is “Yes” or “Yes, you could lose one or two” not “let me tell you why you are wrong for having pillows”. If you apologize I’m sure you can get back to normal relations. [view]
posted by corb to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 18 at 7:59 AM
151 users marked this as a favorite

FWIW, if a friend had sent me something like that, I would probably not have read the remark as an invitation to offer my honest opinion, I would have read it as a tongue-in-cheek way of indicating she knows and has accepted that she has more pillows on the sofa than most people and does NOT want to hear any further comment on it. [view]
posted by solotoro to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 18 at 8:06 AM
126 users marked this as a favorite

No. That is not normal. That is abusive/stalker behavior. DTMFA, block his number. If he comes around, tell him to leave and call the cops. If he persists, get a restraining order. [view]
posted by DoubleLune to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 22 at 11:10 AM
120 users marked this as a favorite

It sounds like her question was rhetorical/joking, not an earnest desire for feedback. Apologize and move on. [view]
posted by sonmi to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 18 at 8:04 AM
110 users marked this as a favorite

Hi! I am a trans person in Boston and I can (a) point you to a bunch of resources if you want (b) also sit down with you IRL if you want and have a conversation and promise not to get annoyed and you can ask me whatever. The short answer on "resources" if your kid is under 25 is BAGLY for them (a Boston-area peer support group for LGBT... [more]
posted by nebulawindphone to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 17 at 5:31 PM
95 users marked this as a favorite

"Hi Chores, I'm sorry I was a grinch about your pillows. I was having a grumpy day and shouldn't have been rude. I miss you. Can I buy you a latte and we can talk about phones and coats and never speak of pillows again? You can also smack or smother me with a pillow as revenge, but that's a one time offer that expires at the end of January.... [more]
posted by pseudostrabismus to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 18 at 8:09 AM
90 users marked this as a favorite

For those who never felt entitled to anything growing up, a birthday is a day of the year where it is socially okayed to want something, and to miss it if it isn't there. Especially when it is ignored by people with whom you want to build a trusting, significantly 'held' relationship. I think what your partner's behaviour is rubbing up against [and... [more]
posted by honey-barbara to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 21 at 12:54 AM
85 users marked this as a favorite

Please understand that there are no "signs" that you'd notice in many cases. To this day, my mom still doesn't "believe" me and I've been out for like 4 years and I've known for 25. It's absolutely destroyed our relationship. Please just whole-heartedly support them by doing what they ask of you with name and pronoun, and being... [more]
posted by odinsdream to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 17 at 5:29 PM
78 users marked this as a favorite

"It sounds like her question was rhetorical/joking, not an earnest desire for feedback." Yeah, wow, I think you badly misread what the original question was, which was a friendship overture where she was gently making fun of her over-the-top pillowness and your proper response was an affectionate "lol omg" or... [more]
posted by Eyebrows McGee to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 18 at 8:35 AM
77 users marked this as a favorite

Listen, there is nothing wrong with it if it is a phase. If your teen moves back and forth between genders their whole life, that is great and wonderful and you should be proud of them for living their own truth. So, take out of your head that it might matter if it is a phase. Everything in life is always a phase and nothing is permanent. It is... [more]
posted by stoneweaver to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 17 at 5:55 PM
67 users marked this as a favorite

(I made that library of tobacco industry docs! What a thrill to see it getting use 20 years after I began that work at UCSF!) [view]
posted by Riverine to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 17 at 2:56 PM
61 users marked this as a favorite

He would have to have access to your credit card to be able to use it to add more money to the prepaid card. The only money he has gotten from you is the money you already put on the card. If he does not have a bank account, which may be the case for someone without a permanent or fixed residence/address, the prepaid card is a way for him to... [more]
posted by nightrecordings to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 22 at 2:32 PM
59 users marked this as a favorite

You were not expecting too much. This person was incredibly rude. You were fine and did nothing wrong. I'm sorry this happened to you. Probably not worth saying anything to them about it. What they did was so beyond normal behavior (they sent you a list of all the people who are going? What is that?!) that I really wouldn't expend a drop more... [more]
posted by sockermom to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 18 at 3:01 AM
57 users marked this as a favorite

She didn't ask for your opinion. She was making a bid for connection, in order to bolster feelings of kinship and goodwill with you during what can be a very stressful and emotional time of year for a lot of people. A kind and loving response would have looked like any one of the jokey responses in this thread. Your response was somewhat cruel,... [more]
posted by palomar to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 18 at 10:43 AM
57 users marked this as a favorite

Oh god yes they're likely really anxious about this please send a heart emoji and tell them you love them. [view]
posted by odinsdream to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 17 at 6:03 PM
55 users marked this as a favorite

Think of it this way. You send her a picture of your minimalist living room and say, "Do you think my coffee table is empty enough?" She replies, "Warning: honest opinions to follow! Your coffee table is cold and impersonal. A guest who visits you doesn't have any sense of who you really are. If a guest wants to put a glass on the... [more]
posted by FencingGal to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 18 at 8:56 AM
54 users marked this as a favorite

Here is a thought: very few drug dealers take credit card. If this person is in addiction recovery, you have given him a way to purchase food and necessities in a way that doesn't give him the option of purchasing drugs he's trying to avoid. (I don't see any alarm bells here and I'm a suspicious, hateful person.) [view]
posted by phunniemee to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 22 at 2:49 PM
54 users marked this as a favorite

While working with real human bones in my osteology classes I had a bit of a moment when I knew enough about aging and sexing bone to realize that the skull I was holding had once belonged to a woman who had died younger than me. My professor's motto helped. "Mortui Vivos Docent" The dead teach the living. You will do so much good as a... [more]
posted by Homo neanderthalensis to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 22 at 1:17 PM
51 users marked this as a favorite

You need to advertise your birthday if you are an adult and you want people to remember - even partners. "My birthday is coming up! I want you to take me to a surprise dinner. Also here is a link to 3 options of gifts I want." As kids we want people to remember on their own. As adults we need to be our own best advocate. Happy... [more]
posted by Toddles to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 21 at 12:37 AM
50 users marked this as a favorite

Former TSA agent here. This is probably a bad idea, but given the TSA can’t accept gifts thing, I’m imagining rolling up to security with a bunch of like, full sized new fancy shampoos and conditioners and toothpastes and stuff that you obviously can’t fly with and be like “Oh damn! Guess we’ve just gotta leave it here....” They are... [more]
posted by Monday to Ask MetaFilter on Jan 20 at 1:01 PM
46 users marked this as a favorite