Questions in the Human Relations category.
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I want to try and make weeknight sleepovers with my boyfriend easier. It feels like it takes so much planning and schlepping just to hang out on a Tuesday night and still be prepared for work the next day. [more inside]
I didn't get the job I interviewed for last week. The message the interviewer left me seems like she wants me to call her back for some sort of feedback (she didn't say that per se), but she could discuss it. I'm not really sure how I feel about calling back for feedback. I'm afraid it will just put me in a worse mood. Should I call her back when I feel less shitty? [more inside]
I'm a photographer. I recently applied for membership of a professional body, and was rejected. The feedback I was given was simply "The committee enjoyed your work but felt it's not quite developed enough yet for membership." This has had a surprisingly strong impact on me, and I don't quite know how to handle it. [more inside]
There has been a death in my immediate family. I'm off work for a couple weeks however when I return to work the nature of my employment means I will have to endure hundreds of condolence conversations without breaking down. What are some short replies I can use to politely acknowledge the thought but minimize the length of the interaction.
Were you financially intermingled with your partner, with no friends/family support system and children who actually hate you? How did you survive? How do you adapt to living alone again? [more inside]
My 91 year old grandmother lives with my parents, on the first floor of their condo. She has Parkinson's and dementia and is overall pretty frail. In the past six months, she has gotten up in the middle of the night, gotten dressed and tried to leave twice. [more inside]
I have been invited to my friend's wedding (guest, not wedding party). I was excited to go, and told her that, but with the wedding three and a half months out I'm having serious second thoughts for time, financial and headspace reasons. Otoh I am worried that I may be catastrophizing. I would like input, and also advice on how to mitigate the stress on her if I back out. [more inside]
That attract the fewest number of quacks, voyeurs, cons, or abusers? My SO needs a therapist. He’s had some strange experiences with therapists in the past. The person needs to be effective and someone he can trust. [more inside]
I am invisible. By demographic, as well as by personal demeanor, I suppose. (Female, early 60s, average looks, build and grooming, introverted but not silent.) People tend to not notice me in a crowded room, and people I've met/interacted with more than once often fail to remember we've already been introduced. It occurs to me that there must be some way to leverage this quality. What would you do? [more inside]
I know the general advice is to never date your co-workers, but I really like one of mine and am having some intense carpe diem/what’s the worst that could happen feelings. Help me figure out if asking him out is worth it. Snowflakes below. [more inside]
I'm looking to build my social capital within my department. How do I make my office a place where people want to stop by? [more inside]
My super awesome pre-teen 10 year old boy has mini-meltdowns on an increasing basis and I want to help him. [more inside]
I've had eight sessions with a therapist. He's kind and supportive—but fairly passive. Also (and this is quite important), his per-session rate is very reasonable. I don't want to switch to another therapist, and I'm trying to figure out a way to get more out of this therapeutic relationship. [more inside]
In general, our philosophy is "If you want to do x (e.g. soccer) that's great but you have to see the season through, you can't quit whenever you want." Or with music, it's "You can quit piano but only if you do a different instrument, we want you learning something musical." So there is wiggle room. But one of the few things we don't want to negotiate is tennis, because it's important to my SO and I and we really want them to get a foundation in that sport when they're young. Does anyone have strategies for how to approach it when they resist something that you don't want to budge on? Obviously there's bribing... what else?
What metaphors and idioms get used as a crutch in or are unique to your field (or specialization within your field) as shorthand for larger or abstract concepts? [more inside]
My on-again off-again friend has called to try to mend fences. I don’t want to. But she is the mother of my son’s best friend… [more inside]
I'm having a hard time figuring out what to do about a nearly 20-year friendship that has turned difficult for me. [more inside]
Our adult child is abroad finishing grad school (STEM) and for the last 2 years we've been skyping to keep in touch. It's a struggle to find conversation for these weekly online visits. [more inside]
My brain seems to want to be processing and grieving the suicide of a work colleague from 15 years ago. I'm looking for advice and things to read to help the process. [more inside]
Looking for scripts I should have used instead of (eep, I know how bad this sounds) going silent on these people. [more inside]