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What are some books – practical advice or philosophical reflection – about aging that have been helpful to you in navigating the process? [more inside]
posted by ryanshepard at 7:07 PM - 10 answers

When I get envious of someone, I avoid them because they trigger painful feelings of inadequacy and resentment. It feels very uncomfortable. But some people seem to keep seeking out the objects of their envy, asking them to hang out, and stalking their social media. This can go on for years. Why are they proactively causing themselves pain like this? [more inside]
posted by sandwich at 1:58 PM - 16 answers

My father and a cousin have a great interest in family genealogy. They uncovered grand parents or great great grandparents who were first cousins and are now wondering about various anxiety issues we have, that strongly feature in the family, that they feel could be related. My son also has autism… and my father was wondering if it could be related. I’m inclined to think not, you have a lot of anxiety and autism around these days and these things were fairly common back then. Anyway, I saw a Reddit answer that said genetic issues from cousin marriages disappear after one generation, provided there aren’t more cousin marriages. Is there anyone here that can say or direct us to an article?
posted by anonymous at 6:04 AM - 19 answers

I've recently put two and two together and realized that my father is either mostly narcissistic or at least has some fairly strong narcissistic tendencies. I need book recommendations on how to navigate this. [more inside]
posted by tafetta, darling! at 2:12 PM - 9 answers

My friend moved away and comes back to visit only a couple times a year. Last time she was in town, we made plans to hang out and catch up. Instead, she canceled on me the day before and was evasive about it. She later admitted that she'd arranged a date with a new guy instead. I'm not cool with this and am reevaluating the friendship. Am I overreacting? Should I give her grace for this misstep after so many years of friendship? [more inside]
posted by keep it under cover at 5:58 PM - 33 answers

I'm a child-free person dating a person with a 6 year old. Looking for resources (books, websites, podcasts, etc) for this new chapter, not focused on integrating lives or households, just more navigating hard conversations or issues that might come up. [more inside]
posted by greta simone at 9:47 AM - 4 answers

Over the last few years, Mr. Blah & I fell in love with our neighbors, and their 8yo daughter became like a quasi-grandchild to us. Now they've got to relocate literally all the way across the world from us. Everybody's sad about it, especially the kid—apparently her first reaction was "But what about Blah & Mr. Blah?" Please give me some tips and suggestions for staying in touch with her? [more inside]
posted by BlahLaLa at 3:07 PM - 16 answers

Friend's family member is about to die. I was told in confidence by their partner. What is appropriate behavior when the inevitable happens? [more inside]
posted by greta simone at 11:14 AM - 10 answers

Like many millennials, I'm generally not a big fan of AI, so I'm not sure if my bias is showing or if this is actually as crappy as it feels to me. [more inside]
posted by anotheraccount at 9:36 AM - 31 answers

I have a good mother by any textbook definition. She's dedicated, selfless, and was very hands-on when I was growing up. However, either our personalities don't match, or her anxieties got the better of her; either way, my blood pressure shoots up every time I talk to her about something related to myself. [more inside]
posted by redlines at 8:44 AM - 16 answers

i've (24 M) been together with a lovely girl for about 8 months now. nearly three months ago I made an extremely rash decision and received oral sex from a younger man. I feel so guilty and remorseful but have mainly decided to not tell her. now I've been left questioning the morality of this decision over and over again. I love her so much but the betrayal I committed has been eating at me. but I'm not sure what to do given the circumstances... [more inside]
posted by sd801xyz at 10:24 PM - 40 answers

With the New Year here, I’ve realized something about myself—I’m not great at making toasts or steering good conversation at dinner. [more inside]
posted by nandaro at 5:49 AM - 10 answers

Having some difficulty figuring out the least stressful path around making a good plan for moving out of shared apartment with partner, when dealing with both relationship and job toxicity/stress at the same time. [more inside]
posted by bellalia at 8:01 PM - 14 answers

My partner and I are two queer women. One of us is adopted, and the other is donor-conceived. We both have strong feelings about family and identity but are generally private. As such, we usually do not disclose that we are adopted or donor-conceived unless we have a very close or intimate relationship with someone. We are married and at an age where many of our friends have children. We will not be using any assisted reproductive technologies or adopting if we decide to bring children into our family. Usually, we avoid having detailed conversations around this topic, but in some cases, it's unavoidable, and I'd like some help navigating these situations. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 7:19 PM - 28 answers

This month I lost two friends to cancer, including my best friend of 40 years just a week ago. In a couple days I return to my apartment in Pittsburgh, where I live alone and don't know many people on account of being new. I am dreading the solitude but I don't do support groups or religion. Aside from the usual "meeting people" activities, how can I meet others who will be good supports? [more inside]
posted by mermaidcafe at 9:05 PM - 5 answers

I'd like to be a kinder, gentler, softer person to those around me and would like to volunteer in some capacity. However, I'm very much an introvert, have terrible social anxiety, and struggle with feeling trapped when I have a commitment with a set time. Can you help me figure out how I can both be of help to others, while also taking care of myself (but maybe also stretching myself a little bit)? [more inside]
posted by Sassyfras at 9:48 AM - 11 answers

I'm the caretaker for a chronically ill parent. During past emergencies, I discovered that my support network was sparser than I wanted. My friend network was great for sharing fun times but less reliable when my mom was in the hospital. What are your tips for building a stronger support network for future medical tough times? [more inside]
posted by roastbeef at 1:19 PM - 15 answers

I need to give my thoughts a little room. What can I do to make this happen ? [more inside]
posted by nicolin at 1:50 AM - 26 answers

How should I, or how should I have reacted when my Mother in Law made a comment about my wife making all the money? [more inside]
posted by ljs30 at 1:20 PM - 25 answers

26th year of marriage. 26th Christmas fight. Can the cycle be broken? [more inside]
posted by Lemkin at 11:42 AM - 91 answers