My vote goes for marzipan.

December 16, 2006 1:56 AM

Having read the ying, I am now curious about the yang: fellatio aficionados, what does it taste like to you?
posted by Arthur "Two Sheds" Jackson to Human Relations (39 answers total)

yin. Not "ying".
posted by exlotuseater at 2:05 AM on December 16, 2006 [1 favorite]

It really depends on what he's been eating and his general health - and also how long it's been since he previously offloaded. It's always salty, but can be bitter, sweet etc and if it's been stewing in his balls for a while, it's usually stronger and more densely flavoured.
posted by goo at 2:12 AM on December 16, 2006

It tastes like love.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 2:17 AM on December 16, 2006

It does depend on what he's been eating; my husband loves Ice Breakers spearmint flavored mints, and I can tell when he's been eating them. There's nothing to compare it to otherwise, not in my experience. It just tastes like what it is, much like how red velvet cake and Jagermeister taste unique and you can't compare them to something else. I don't find "it" particularly salty although many people use that description. There's usually some bitterness or sourness though.
posted by smashingstars at 3:09 AM on December 16, 2006

well, a woman might be curious about what it tastes like because she can't (unless she's fantastically flexible) reach down there and taste it herself.

on the other hand, you sir, have no such limitations, so why not take matters into your own hands!
posted by sergeant sandwich at 4:11 AM on December 16, 2006 [2 favorites]

Soap. At least I hope so.
posted by Tasty Like Your 9V Battery at 4:57 AM on December 16, 2006

Are you asking what a penis tastes like or what semen tastes like? A penis tastes like any other part of the body, assuming he keeps it clean. Semen tastes like runny egg yolks.

Red velvet cake is chocolate and Jagermeister tastes like black licorice.
posted by lampoil at 5:01 AM on December 16, 2006

The wifes says "Turkey gravy". Salt and protein and all that.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 5:27 AM on December 16, 2006

Salty and bitter, but not unpleasant to me UNLESS the guy smokes. Tobacco, weed, it doesn't matter - I think it's the tars.
posted by watsondog at 6:13 AM on December 16, 2006

Salty egg whites has my vote.
posted by chickygrrl at 6:30 AM on December 16, 2006

I've been told smells like clorox and tastes like raw egg whites with slightly salty thing happening.
posted by stavx at 6:42 AM on December 16, 2006

Most of the time, I'd say salty and slightly sour egg whites is probably the most accurate description. With kind of an egg-drop soup consistency. Although sometimes it's just like a really big hork of phlegm from the back of your throat. (Seconding goo, I'd say that happens when he's, uh, shooting more frequently.)

Some other observations:

Meat-eaters taste stronger and more bitter than vegetarians/vegans.

Drinking pineapple juice really does make it taste sweet.
posted by AV at 7:20 AM on December 16, 2006

well, a woman might be curious about what it tastes like because she can't (unless she's fantastically flexible) reach down there and taste it herself.

on the other hand, you sir, have no such limitations, so why not take matters into your own hands!

This confuses me! Why can't women use their hands?
posted by thirteenkiller at 7:24 AM on December 16, 2006

well, a woman might be curious about what it tastes like because she can't (unless she's fantastically flexible) reach down there and taste it herself.

on the other hand, you sir, have no such limitations, so why not take matters into your own hands!

This makes no sense.
posted by justgary at 8:23 AM on December 16, 2006

well, a woman might be curious about what it tastes like because she can't (unless she's fantastically flexible) reach down there and taste it herself.

on the other hand, you sir, have no such limitations, so why not take matters into your own hands!

sergeant sandwich: All men are not as well-endowed/flexible as yourself.
posted by null terminated at 8:47 AM on December 16, 2006

It really, truly varies by diet, where meat and caffeine have the most effect. But there is always an underlying bleachiness that tastes very much like alfalfa sprouts.
posted by lunalaguna at 9:13 AM on December 16, 2006

Buttermilk and Clorox, according to Philip Roth.
posted by danb at 9:39 AM on December 16, 2006

Mild, faintly bitter scallops.
posted by scody at 9:50 AM on December 16, 2006

Baking soda dissolved in warm water.
posted by macadamiaranch at 10:12 AM on December 16, 2006

Second the baking soda/warm water comment, although there are variations. With at least one ex it really varied depending on what he'd had to eat or drink recently. I've been with someone else who tasted extremely bitter - don't know what that was all about.
posted by SisterHavana at 11:43 AM on December 16, 2006

Like Danaë's longing.
posted by Haruspex at 11:45 AM on December 16, 2006

Salty, tangy, with an ammonia note.

Yes you can affect its flavour, but in my experience, not drastically. It all has had that same basic flavour, just stronger or (preferably) milder.
posted by loiseau at 11:53 AM on December 16, 2006

I have been told I taste like pickle juice.
posted by Iron Rat at 11:58 AM on December 16, 2006

No matter which of my partners it was, it always tasted "clean" to me; not bad, not delicious, not salty, not like Clorox. Just...somehow...clean. Didn't seem to matter what they ate or drank. But maybe I am a weird case.
posted by angeline at 12:12 PM on December 16, 2006

Hot glue. Ugh.
posted by CwgrlUp at 12:14 PM on December 16, 2006

She says it tastes like pee; but maybe I'm not doing it right.
posted by found missing at 12:22 PM on December 16, 2006 [2 favorites]

Agreed, lunalaguna, tastes and smells like sprouts to me.
posted by re.becca at 2:33 PM on December 16, 2006

Gross. Why bother? Just cover it with Saran wrap so you don't have to taste anything.
posted by HotPatatta at 2:47 PM on December 16, 2006

Just cover it with Saran wrap

Cover what, exactly? The penis? The semen? The tongue?
posted by scody at 4:07 PM on December 16, 2006

Egg white and sea water, so i've been told.
posted by softlord at 4:59 PM on December 16, 2006

bitter, briny, and yeasty
posted by FunkyHelix at 5:08 PM on December 16, 2006

Chestnuts in blossom. Ok, that's smell, not taste. But they're related, right?
posted by Coaticass at 5:19 PM on December 16, 2006

Nth on the "Everyone tastes different" comment. For me, it's run the gamut from pickle juice to warm spumoni ice cream.
posted by princesspathos at 5:23 PM on December 16, 2006

Boiled peanuts.
posted by luftmensch at 5:53 PM on December 16, 2006

Usually, latex.
posted by chairface at 8:43 PM on December 16, 2006

One guy I was with: like aspirin dissolving. Ugh.
Smelled strongly like tulip poplar in bloom.
posted by LobsterMitten at 8:50 PM on December 16, 2006

I had one once that had a strong asparagus tone. It surprised me, but he was gorgeous. A beautiful teenager of the strawberry blond variety. He was a couple years older than myself. (Thank you for inviting such a wonderful memory)

The sour note is usually there, but not always. Neither is salt always present. Some are acidic, many are not.
posted by Goofyy at 5:17 AM on December 18, 2006

Bad. Like something I wish I'd not tasted. Live and learn.

I think "hot glue" comes closest to what I read above.

Pre-cum (god I hate the word "cum", is there a better term? pre-seminal ejectus?) is sweet to me and not gross.
posted by beth at 11:45 PM on December 22, 2006

am I off (or is my bf)? I think it taste the same as a newly mowed lawn smells.
posted by Bravocharlie at 12:49 PM on December 29, 2006