October 24
How can I listen to more Cuban Spanish content?
I would like to relatively quickly train my ear to understand spoken Spanish better, especially Cuban Spanish. I'm a little past the "News in Slow Spanish" phase of language learning. Are there any podcasts, audiobooks, radio shows, movies produced by Cubans or Cuban emigres that I can listen to? Ideally, with subtitles or a written transcription that I can follow along with? [more inside]
After seperation with child, do you consider ex family still?
I have been seperated, and have lived seperately for 3 months from my ex, we have a 14 month old daughter. Looking through my past questions, it's clear I have a hard time setting and sticking to boundaries, and especially hard now in this instance when I'm trying to co-parent with someone who acts as if we are still together, and tells his family we are, and doesn't really listen or believe me when I say I have nothing left to give or hope for. Am I terrible for feeling as if he is not part of my family and I don't want to be part of his due to the fact that we are seperated now? [more inside]
Favorite weekday recipes you can make without fresh ingredients?
What are some great recipes that take less than 30 minutes and can be constructed using ingredients from tins or that live in the pantry? I'd like to increase my repertoire of tasty things I can prepare without either a trip to the grocery store or carefully planned fridge-stocking in advance.
This election has revealed that I do not know as much as I think!
I need better news sources and am sometimes at a loss as to how to evaluate stuff on the internet. I am looking for left-leaning but fact-based news and opinion sources that discuss ongoing events and get fairly detailed about issues, events and policy - not the Economist, not Foreign Affairs, not Harper's or the Atlantic or the Guardian. [more inside]
Help me make that fun swoosh-squoosh noise when I walk.
As it is finally cooling off in our area, I am in need of new corduroy pants. I am a plus size, petite (long torso, short legs) curvy (small waist, but hippy) woman. However, where I'm even more of a special snowflake is that I'm a child of the 90s, so this skinny pant/legging popularity is pure torture for me. [more inside]
name some living ex-cons who later became millionaire entrepreneurs
I'm looking for people out there currently who made a felony criminal mistake, served their time in prison, and later (today) became successful entrepreneurs. While I know there are probably a lot in music, film and TV, I'm also looking for the ones in OTHER industries.
Dealing with Drupal - short term question and long term question
As part of my post doc work, I'm helping to finish up a Drupal site that has been built by a few different grad students and post docs. They're gone, there's no documentation, and I need to finish up some parts and the faculty supervising me really haven't had any hand in the details. Drupal is sort of wildly-overfeatured for the simplicity of our site, but that ship has sailed. I have a small amount of CMS experience (older Drupal version and Wordpress) but I'm having trouble with a couple of things. [more inside]
What Would Jorah (Mormont) Say?
I am considering going out on Halloween as Ser Jorah Mormont (of Game of Thrones). Part of the appeal is a little bit of character acting.
What would Ser Jorah say, after squinting wistfully into the distance, if he misheard what his companion said in a noisy bar and instead responded about: his unrequited mistress, the wars of years past, the habits of Dothraki hordes, etc? [more inside]
Convergence insufficiency in a young child
Based on the results of my near-6-year-old's kindergarten eye exam, and watching the followup, I expect he may be diagnosed with convergence insufficiency and we may be recommended to do vision therapy. I'm interested in hearing about people's experiences, and in any information that may help me evaluate whatever I'm told at the upcoming meeting to discuss the results of the exams. [more inside]
Can I include logos/signs in my documentary film without permission?
my footage includes:
1. business names/logos in the background of outdoor shots
2. phone numbers of businesses on bus stop benches, etc.
3. people walking by in the background
4. logos on my subject's clothing
5. vehicle license plates driving by in the shot. [more inside]
Culture Day in Tokyo
Help me figure out what we should be doing on or around the week of Culture Day in Tokyo. [more inside]
Hourly vs. salaried?
What exactly does it mean to be paid hourly? [more inside]
Short but Scary - for middle schoolers
Tell me your favorite scary, creepy, Halloween-ish shows for a middle school audience, that aren't so long they take up too much of a party. [more inside]
the appearance of delight while fantasizing about the kill
How do professional women* manage to maintain poise, or, even more--smiling--in the face of overwhelming emotion? [more inside]
You are not my tech support, but you are my tech support
My friend has a Lenovo G770 laptop that has developed problems with the screen display and the battery. Coincidental? Or related? What is the hypothesis space and how do I whittle it down? More inside. [more inside]
Experienced writer writing first play
While I have an MFA in creative writing and lots of experience writing/publishing other genres (poetry, fiction, creative nonfiction), I've never written a play that was meant to be performed. I have written verse plays, but performance wasn't a factor. I'm hoping to get some tips beforehand on strategies unique to playwriting. More inside. [more inside]
Tax relief question: Curadebt review / IRS detainment at airports
I am an EU resident and have pending IRS tax debt (~$30,000) from when I was a US Resident (until 2011). I was on a payment plan but my finances were difficult for a while and I defaulted on my payments starting in 2013. I have had no communication from the IRS in this time (they have my current contact information). I would like to settle this issue now and be rid of this debt. I would like to request the MeFi community for help regarding two questions I have. [more inside]
I need an intervention with my fiance before it's too late.
I am in a crisis situation with my SO. We are engaged with a wedding date less than 8 months away. While she is busy planning the wedding, I am spending more and more of my free time worrying about everything that is wrong with our relationship. As much as I'm praying that we can work through our issues, our fights have become more frequent and nastier. As a result, I'm experiencing major anxiety related to the upcoming wedding. I'm going to have a conversation with her about my feelings but am genuinely torn about what decision to make: keep the wedding date and try to work through our issues vs. postpone the wedding and work through our issues vs. cancel the engagement altogether vs. break up. Based on the relationship dynamics I describe below, what is everyone's advice as to the best course of action to take? To postpone the wedding & work through the issues seems like the most logical path, but my gut feeling tells me that she won't be receptive to that idea. [more inside]
Want a Big Red Barn for a Vermont Wedding, Lack Funds.
My daughter and her longtime girlfriend are engaged and are in early days of planning their wedding for fall of 2017. They're both horsey, outdoors women and they both have always dreamt of celebrating in a big red barn (Vermont friends will know this is A THING). The catch: they don't want to spend $3k and up on fulfilling their dream wedding as they're both good, frugal Yankee stock. How to get this to happen? [more inside]
October 23
Find the Fabric!
I suspect I have the most impossible askme question ever... but miracles have happened here before, so I thought I'd give it a try! I have found a bolt of fabric that I've fallen in love with, but the shop (Zarin in NYC) doesn't have enough of it for my upholstering project. [more inside]
Online movie service for classic movies?
Is there a Netflix type of service that's geared for classic (pre-1970) movies? I'm outside of the USA, so TCM.com doesn't work. [more inside]
Flash Error On Xfinity on Demand
Help me fix flash error on Xfinity on demand. Comcast is no help at all. [more inside]
Strategies for a fun, affordable large wedding in the midwest?
We want to throw a party for about 300 people that happens to begin with a wedding ceremony. What are some nontraditional / outside-the-wedding-industrial-complex strategies for creating a meaningful, festive, family-centered, and cost-conscious celebration event for such a large group? We're in St. Louis, Missouri but are very interested in general strategies and examples from other regions that may not be as commonly known here, as well as St. Louis-specific advice. Help! [more inside]
One Girl, Two Cups: How to separate two cups stuck together?
While moving, I put a glass tumbler inside a tea mug like so. Now they are stuck and I cannot separate them. I tried running hot water over them; I tried applying vegetable oil with a Q-tip but can't get it down far enough; I even tried breaking the tumbler in hopes that I could salvage the mug. (It's pretty sturdy). Any ideas?
How do you get silly string off indoor walls?
My latex painted, rough textured white wall now has festoons of glow in the dark silly string firmly bonded to it. How do I get this off? [more inside]
Where to for Seattle guerilla wedding?
What are the best free or nearly free places in or quite close to Seattle that would be nice for a small 8 person wedding party to have a ceremony? We are thinking outdoors, like at a park, like Gas Works Park for instance. [more inside]
Media About Occult Stores, Books, Organizations, etc.
One of my favorite tropes in film, TV, and books is when there's a supernatural, occult, and mysterious world hidden just beneath the surface of our own (metaphorically or physically), and that one simply needs to dig a little deeper to find it. I especially love it when an outsider gains knowledge of or access to this supernatural part of our world through a store, book, or, heck, even the words of a mysterious old person. [more inside]
Who would want an old wall unit air conditioner / heater (PTAC)?
I live in a condo that is heated and cooled by PTAC's - 100+ pound electric air conditioner / heater wall units such as are common in hotel rooms. Except that two of mine are 15+ years old and don't work well, such that I need to replace them. I want to find someone to take my old PTAC's away and ideally help me put the new ones in place too. I figure I'd just put a posting up on Craigslist with that offer (no charge for the units, but I don't pay anything either), but before I do, I'm curious: are there really people out there who would be interested in this? If so, why? For the scrap metal? For the bit of life left in the things? Are they worth more than I thought, should I charge something? More info on them below. [more inside]
How do I underwear like a grown-ass woman?
I have no idea how to buy underwear that fits anymore. How do I buy underwear in the modern world? [more inside]
Workplace Drama - How do I choose/do I have to?
Work part time (eg, no full time contract) in academia. Currently split between two departments, with most of my time spent in Department A. Department B gave me a promotion. Now Department A wants me to only work with them. Dept B wants me to eventually be full time with them. Added complication: there is growing bad blood between the two departments, and both sides are smearing each other. [more inside]
"I Voted" Selfie Contest?
I run the social media pages for our school's page, and want to do our part to GOTV on the 8th. I was thinking about doing a prize drawing for people who post selfies with their "I Voted!" sticker. As long as the selfie is taken at least 100 ft from the polling place - is there any legal issue here? I'm in Missouri, if it matters. We all get offered stickers here, and I suspect the number of absentee voters in our area will be low, so not too worried about them feeling left out.
Halloween costume for a blue-haired 8 year old
My 8 year old son cannot decide what he wants to be for Halloween. He has turquoise blue hair, which doesn't have to be part of his costume, but I mean, if you're going to have blue hair, you may as well make the most of it at Halloween, eh? [more inside]
Raising kids in a ski/ mountain town vs a large city??
We recently moved from Brooklyn to Lake Tahoe and love it... but we're starting a family soon and i'm freaking out a little. Is a small mountain/ski town really a great place to raise kids? Is it "better" than raising them in NYC? [more inside]
Please help identify this film!
Sitting around at the pub and a friend is dying to find the name of a film she saw as a child - please release her from this cinematographic purgatory! [more inside]
You don't need a silver fork to eat good food.
Can Metafilter please crowdsource our dinner tonight. I'm out of ideas. [more inside]
Surfing Lessons Near Bangkok
I just had my first surfing lesson and it was a lot of fun. I'll be in Bangkok and Pattaya later this week, but somehow I can't find any surf schools. Can the hive recommend and schools or teachers in that area?
Bitten by bedbugs at hotel
Help me deal without panicking [more inside]
How would I know if my webcam had been infected by malware?
The news stories on Friday's attack on Dyn noted that devices from the "internet of things" has been infected by malware which was conscripting them to send requests to the DNS. Is there anyway I could know if devices which I own were infected? If they were is there anything I could do about it?
Frame me
I'm trying rather desperately to find some new eyeglass frames that are very similar in shape to a pair purchased years ago. I don't even know if there's a name for the shape I'm searching for; it seems fairly uncommon. Please see this photo of my old frames. New frames can be just about any material, and I strongly prefer to buy online at a shop that offers high index lenses. Anyone seen some glasses this shape? Thanks for any info you can provide!
October 22
Loan or gift?
Someone we met earlier this year needs help. He has asked for a loan but we can easily afford to give the money to him. We're not sure whether it's better to lend it to him or just make it a gift. [more inside]
Am I too incompatible with my white fiance?
I am a Nigerian woman engaged to a white guy of Swedish background. We live in Canada. We've been together for about five years and I love him very much.
We've been arguing a lot lately, mainly because of what I perceive to be his pattern of insensitive and condescending behaviour towards me. Recently he was in one of his argumentative moods, and in response to me saying (facetiously) that I have a fantasy about killing slave masters, he told me that it's strange for me to identify with descendants of slaves, since my ancestors in Nigeria also sold slaves to Europeans. He said by talking as if I have suffered from the Trans-Atlantic slave trade, I am "appropriating someone else's tragedy". This deeply upset me, more than any of his other insensitive / arrogant comments have.
He has also made other comments that suggest he is not sensitive enough to race issues to support me. He doesn't seem to understand how black people understand their identity or how racism works. I fear that we are going to have problems in our marriage because of this.
How can I explain why the comment he made is so hurtful? Have any of you found yourselves in a situation like this, and stayed in your relationship? [more inside]
Stressing out about cooking mini-Thanksgiving tomorrow
I'm cooking a mini-Thanksgiving for six people tomorrow, occasioned by my birthday (yesterday) and realizing that I had a turkey in the freezer from last year. Turkey is now in the fridge, thawed. But I haven't cooked a turkey or mashed potatoes in a few years, and I haven't cooked for more than 4 people in a while either, so I'm kind of freaking out. Help me plan, and suggest mashed potato and turkey recipes! [more inside]
Have yourself a pleasant end of year period
I'm trying to think about what to do for the Christmas-New Years-Early January Birthday period this year. Every year I get stressed out and exhausted thinking about all the planning buying all the presents, doing all the cleaning & decorating and such that I don't really get around to anything and the actual days in question are kind of let downs. Then I feel regret and wish I could get a re-do. Trying to avoid it all this year. Any thoughts? [more inside]
What to do in northern NJ?
We will have time to kill this Sunday afternoon. Looking for things to do between Princeton and Newark, New Jersey. Unique sights, nature stuff, events, anything goes. Also, any suggestions for comfortable, quiet places to rest?
Identifying a Mexican mariachi trumpet/brass sample from an 80s song
The first 40 seconds of the song "Ecstasy" by The Wolfgang Press (1984) features a sample of a Mexican mariachi-style trumpet/brass piece. I cannot identify the source of this sample. [more inside]
Meet the devil at me
Help me dress up like a Crossroads (as in, Blues musician Robert Johnson selling his soul to Satan at a crossroads).... [more inside]
My son ruins shoes. What are the most ruin-resistant high-tops for him?
My 8 year old son has some foot issues...his feet/ankles pronate inward. Between his OT and his podiatrist, we've been told to get him anti-pronation inserts and high top sneakers for ankle support. The inserts were easy to get...the high tops are not as simple. We're looking for recommendations! [more inside]
49 Day Funeral Customs
My friend, who is Taiwanese American, is having a gathering at his home for his mother’s 49 day funeral ceremony. We will be making paper lotus blossoms. This is in the United States, and we are in our mid-30s. I am not sure what dress is appropriate for the 49 day funeral ceremony. Is it formal black? Casual since we will be making origami lotuses? Also, is it appropriate to bring food and alcohol? Are there more traditional offerings that I should bring? Are there any other customs that I should be aware of for this ceremony?
Roof leak! Eek!
Two-three years ago, I had an oak branch plummet through my roof, like a spear thrown from Thor himself. Of course this was the year after my new roof had been installed, but I digress. I took a new shingle, and some of that black goo (can't remember the name) up there, and patched it up nicely.... [more inside]
please help me find a comic from my childhood
As a child, I dimly remember reading a specific comic book, and (after all this time) I'd like to find it again.
The story had Iron Fist fighting Fu Manchu in a frozen or icy place. [more inside]
Children's book identification - 1970s
Another one of these!
There is a book I have been trying to remember (for no real reason) for 157 years, and I'm finally going to ask. Early to mid-1970s, color illustrations, gems, a little girl... [more inside]
Really funny comedy recommendations?
Looking for recommendations for movies or TV shows that will make me laugh out loud, with a couple specifications. [more inside]
Does your town schedule Trick or Treat?
I grew up in Ohio and trick or treat times would be scheduled and published in the newspaper. I'm in California now and can't seem to find scheduled trick or treat times for my town. Is it possible scheduling trick or treat is just an Ohio/Midwest thing? [more inside]
How to distract a hungry cat?
After fostering cats for a couple of years I decided to adopt the lovely Adelaide, rescued as a stray late last winter. She's been with me since February and recently I've had to own up to how she's putting on too much weight. More details inside. [more inside]
Are non-committal friends the new normal?
It is sometimes a herculean struggle to get people in my friend group to commit to events. Often 50% to 75% will cancel the day of the event, just hours before. None of them have kids, serious relationships, or crazy work schedules. Is it me? Could I organize things differently? Or is this the new normal? [more inside]
Best resources for cheap flexible last-minute travel?
Which resources should I be using to find high-value/low-cost flights/hotels if I don't have a particular destination in mind? Looking to take a short trip from NYC for a couple of days next week and go someplace new or different (to me). Do airlines have last-minute just fill some seat deals for those of us who don't travel enough to have any status? Do you have specific ideas for easy and inexpensive escapes from NYC at the end of October?
Cracks in drywall: who do we call?
We recently noticed some cracks in the drywall around a little alcove in our kitchen. The cracks appear right on the seam of the drywall where the wall angles away from the main kitchen wall. They're on both sides of the alcove. It looks to me like a patch job was done before, and I am concerned this is pointing to something more serious. Is it just a patch job over some poor drywalling, or should I be calling somebody in? If so, who? Photos are here. [more inside]
Please help me to not quit teaching.
This is my second year as a certified secondary classroom teacher (I have 4 years of experience including full-time substituting k-12 and paraprofessional work). I don't know where to begin. I live 3000 miles away from all of my family and friends. I teach in an urban school in Arizona, consistently ranked as the 1st or 2nd worst state for teachers. I'm depressed, frustrated with myself, and feel like I'm losing control of my class more and more as the year goes on. Soul-spilling rant inside. [more inside]
Managing post stress emotions
Things are finally better at work, but I think I'm finally letting myself have the meltdown I should have had before. How do I keep it from impacting my work and life? Strategies, tips? [more inside]
Should I let my mom use my name in a MLM business?
My mom has joined a MLM business that sells "health" products. They've got all sorts of wonderful claims and, of course, no science to back them up. My mom wants to add my name in as one of her distributors. She says she will do all the work, I'll get the money, and eventually a new car. She just needs my social security number and bank account. [more inside]