Questions in the Human Relations category.
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August 16

Rental and Reasonable Expectation

My land lord wants things to be quiet from 11 pm to 6 am which is fine. She claims that she gets migraines and is an incredibly light sleeper, and any noise can wake her up. [more inside]
posted by PinkMoose at 10:13 PM - 18 answers

What is this emotional-relational process called?

I am embarrassed that I don't know the answer but the Hive Mind is very smart. I trust you to help me figure out what this problem or process around emotion and communication is called so I can deal with it better. [more inside]
posted by crunchy potato at 10:05 AM - 25 answers

How do you decide what's a dealbreaker for you in a relationship?

I have dated several people who were essentially great matches for me, but in each case, something ended up feeling like a dealbreaker for me when it came time to consider marriage. I would like to get married eventually. How can I best decide when something should or shouldn't be a dealbreaker? A couple of example inside. [more inside]
posted by pinochiette at 6:49 AM - 20 answers

August 15

How do I prevent losing friends as soon as I make them?

I have always been an introverted, shy person (also moderately anxious) and have always had issues with keeping friends. In my past, I've been pretty good at making friends fast but not good at keeping them. I think it’s because I open up to people really easily, I am nice, I am a decent conversationalist, and some people have said I can be really funny and fun to be around. [more inside]
posted by koolaidnovel at 11:14 AM - 7 answers

Why does my brain feel fried?

I was just in a business meeting for an hour and a half and I had trouble focusing or being able to think coherently towards the end. I am very tired and I feel like I need a nap. I did have enough sleep last night. I still feel overstimulated and somewhat overwhelmed. How can I expand my attention span and reduce my sensitivity? [more inside]
posted by sheepishchiffon at 10:20 AM - 15 answers

Just to be abundantly clear, there is no porn stash

I've inadvertently created the impression that I have contraband hidden in our house. Help me lean into that with suggestions for things I could hide around the place that appear illicit at first (and maybe second) glance but are actually entirely innocent. [more inside]
posted by VoltairePerkins at 8:53 AM - 29 answers

Mr. Always Right

I just read this question and it basically mirrors my situation, minus the marriage. But I feel stupid because I still love parts of him and don't feel ready to leave although everyone is telling me to get the hell out. Help me deal with this situation in the best way possible and figure out the best course of action. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 2:15 AM - 33 answers

August 14

How old should a kid be to fly unaccompanied?

Airlines allow kids to fly as unaccompanied minors at age 5. My husband's kids are 6 and 9 and have flown with parents frequently and successfully. Is this too young for a direct 100-minute flight? [more inside]
posted by LittleMissCranky at 9:58 PM - 25 answers

Family question re siblings

Mrs. L’s two grand nieces (A. aged 11) and (S. aged 14) are back home with their mother from staying with their father for the summer break. This has been happening for the last several years with no problems. However, A. (previously very much a Mommy’s girl) now says she is unhappy and wants to return to live with her father. [more inside]
posted by lungtaworld at 12:48 PM - 11 answers

Two men enter, one man leaves

Very recently started dating a man from my friend group. How should I disclose to him that I was sleeping with another member of our group right up until we started dating? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 12:22 PM - 15 answers

How to share a chair

I need to work in a very specific chair due to some medical concerns. I spent many years of trial and error, research and money finding an ergonomic solution which culminated in the purchase of a special chair years before I met my partner. When partner and I initially moved into together, I was the only person who used this chair. Then, little by little, they began using the chair for their own work when I wasn't around -- and now they insist on sharing it even when I am around. I actually need this chair for medical reasons and I feel that it is "mine". They think the chair is now "ours". How do we proceed? [more inside]
posted by Gray Skies at 10:12 AM - 48 answers

Should I tell you I don't remember who you are?

I'm fairly physically distinctive, and as such, people generally don't have a hard time remembering who I am/where they know me from. Unfortunately, in other places (e.g. on public sidewalks or in grocery stores) I don't always recognize them. Sometimes they start conversations with me. If you were the other party--you know who I am, I don't--what would you prefer that I do? Would you like me to admit this and ask for your name/context? Would you like me to pretend I recognize you and hope you'll drop some clues? Something in-between? [more inside]
posted by one for the books at 9:34 AM - 25 answers

Panic-regretting break up, how do I make it through this?

I decided to break up with him after finding out that he had been lying for months into our relationship. I feel heart broken and I'm regretting the decision and all his pleading started getting to me and sounded plausible the moment I saw him walk out the door. [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 2:11 AM - 33 answers

When communicating seems to make it worse

I tried to be open with my wife about my feelings for another person and it went wrong. Help? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 2:10 AM - 24 answers

Keeping my own insecurity in check

I am a hardworking, high achieving woman of color in an extremely competitive field. A younger POC has recently started seeking my advice. I am happy to be as helpful as possible-- I want him to succeed!-- but I am also noticing myself feeling competitive and insecure, and sometimes have the urge to bring him down a notch. How do I keep these things in check? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 2:10 AM - 14 answers

August 13

Girlfriend doesn't let me know when she's running late until last minute

My girlfriend has a really annoying (to me) habit of only letting me know she's running late either at the very last minute or after the time when she's supposed to have turned up. It's caused us to get into a couple of big fights recently and it happened again tonight as I was cooking her dinner, so I told her not to bother coming over at all because I knew we'd just get into another circular argument about it. [more inside]
posted by AllTheQuestions at 10:11 PM - 59 answers

Linus in need of post-breakup blanket

I'm totally shaken after a breakup (and my response to it). What are some things I can do to regain my sense of self-respect and control, and feel emotionally safer? [more inside]
posted by anonymous at 1:29 AM - 11 answers

pre-marital counselling in NYC for Chinese-American/white couples?

I'm thinking seriously of marrying someone of a different culture (second-generation Chinese-American vs white and been here longer than the country). I'm looking for non-religious pre-martial counselling to help us figure out whether this is a good idea and how to make it work. I'm especially looking for someone with experience with this particular combination of cultures, who can guide us toward discussions of things where we might not realize we have very different assumptions. Personal recommendations would be great. Must be in NYC.
posted by anonymous at 1:29 AM - 7 answers

August 12

How do I navigate this breakup?

My girlfriend broke up with me and now she's insisting that I have to work to regain her trust, and I don't know what to do. [more inside]
posted by smurfzambo at 5:06 PM - 42 answers

Show Your Work

I wish to be recognized as helping. How can I do that? [more inside]
posted by Evilspork at 2:05 PM - 54 answers

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