Whenever I am anticipating a date with or a text from the guy that I'm with, I suddenly find myself avoiding everything I need to do in order to just mentally prep for that encounter. This is obviously not a productive or healthy way to anticipate a good thing, but I have acted this way since I was 16 and now at 26 I want to stop trying to be so damn available. Aside from keeping myself busy with obligations I MUST attend to lest there be Serious Repercussions, what else can I do to persuade my mind that living my life in the intervals will allow me to have better relationships, not the other way around? posted by Hermione Granger at 12:00 AM - 9 answers
I'm 30, male, British. Over the last few weeks I've felt the clouds of my latest depression begin to part and some sunlight poke through. I'm contemplating trying online dating again. How can I take advantage of this improvement whilst being careful not to over-tax myself and do an emotional crash-and-burn? [more inside] posted by anonymous at 6:28 PM - 5 answers
So, I was invited to a wedding reception, but not the wedding itself. Do I bring a card? A gift? Do I put money in the card? There's no registry that I'm aware of. Thanks! posted by Fister Roboto at 2:52 PM - 21 answers
My boyfriend and I have been dating since I was 16 and he was 18. I am not 21 and he is almost 23. We met in high school, though it's an awkward story of how we met.w [more inside] posted by anon1129 at 2:00 PM - 18 answers
Today I got a message from my brother inviting me to our older sister's baby shower on Sunday and saying that she would really like me to come. I'm torn about attending because ...well, my sister didn't actually invite me. It's at her place so obviously it's not a surprise shower. Instead she relied on our brother to do it. [more inside] posted by mariisoul at 11:44 AM - 27 answers
My girlfriend, her parent, and her entire family are 100% convinced that one of her parents has an incurable terminal disease. The catch? None of the test results have come back. In fact, none of the tests have even been done. [more inside] posted by anonymous at 6:35 PM - 24 answers
A religious wingnut--who is also a former coworker--sent me a mildly scary email. I don't know how to respond or if I should ignore it. Details inside. [more inside] posted by Gee, June! at 2:07 PM - 30 answers
What are the logistics of having a parent in so-so to mediocre health move in? He is currently in St. Louis, MO and my wife and I currently live in Johnson City, TN. [more inside] posted by Groundhog Week at 10:44 AM - 10 answers
This is such a little thing I feel ridiculous posting it, but I’m just not sure how to approach this situation (or my feelings about it) so I hope posting here might be helpful! I’ve just started a new relationship (yay!), I like the guy I’ve been seeing, I think he’s funny and caring and interesting, and in general we have fun when we’re together. The whole thing though has been making me feel pretty anxious, I have a history of unhealthy relationships. A little thing (I think) happened about two days ago and it’s set off all these bad feelings, I can’t figure out whether or not I’m being neurotic or even where to go from here. More inside. [more inside] posted by Ocellar at 2:24 PM - 32 answers
So, I was always terrified of this happening, but then I got over it. Well, it turns out I was right- eventually, if I stay on okcupid long enough, I'm going to hit the end of single men my age in my city. [more inside] posted by quincunx at 8:43 AM - 37 answers
Have you ever been in a social situation where there was someone who rubbed you the wrong way or who was difficult to deal with but who was kind of inevitably going to be around you? You tried hard to find their good qualities and maybe liked them occasionally but overall just wished you didn't have to interact with them? How did you learn to deal with this situation? Did your relationship with this person ever improve, or did you eventually just learn to live with having negative feelings towards the person? [more inside] posted by thesnowyslaps at 7:19 AM - 31 answers
I'm an early 30s lesbian who spent most of her 20s in committed relationships. My latest and most significant ended about a year ago and I've started dipping my toe in the scary online dating waters. I'm not ready to get serious yet but since I've been in these long relationships, I've never really 'dated around' per se, except maybe in my very early 20s- although at the time I was pretty closeted and neurotic, so I hardly even count that.
Anyway, I registered on OkCupid and messaged back and forth with a few people. Somewhat naively, I gave two of them my phone number to text. BAD IDEA.
More inside.. [more inside] posted by anad487 at 8:22 PM - 16 answers
In my (D/s) relationship saying “I love you” is totally out of the question. However, expressions of affection and adoration expressing that sentiment are allowed and highly encouraged.
In old B&W movies of the 1930’s/40’s I hear phrases like: “In my eyes there’s no man taller” (about a vertically challenged suitor), and “You set the sun, hang the moon and paint the stars"... Sappy, sentimental, campy, corny, kinky (bonus points for kinkified!), and just plain funny phrases that will let someone know that they are "the only duck in my pond" are what I’m after. posted by goml at 6:38 PM - 18 answers
So this will usually be in a family setting. I live quite far away from most members of my family (brothers, cousins etc).
I look forward to seeing them but when I do something happens.
For the first few hours everything is great, I'm happy to see them. We're getting on great.
Then slowly but surely I start to feel that my life is inadequate, and that I am inadequate.
Witty responses become sarcastic putdowns and insults. I feel like I'm taking things the wrong way.
My own capacity for conversation and fun becomes subdued and almost entirely non-existent. I overthink every word. I feel completely mentally drained. And I wish they would leave as soon as possible!
I know I was happy before the visit or stay. I know I never felt inadequate with any of my friends or work colleagues.
But I feel really bad that I feel this way and I feel even worse in the actual situation. [more inside] posted by razzman at 2:20 PM - 11 answers