Questions in the Human Relations category.
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I moved hundreds of miles away from my husband and his family to participate in an intensive summer class this summer. Someone central to my husband's life has suddenly died and I can't be there to help him through it. I am trying to think of ways to help his family to function during their grieving that I can perform from a distance that will ease their burden and make them feel cared for.
When I get close to people, I start having powerful feelings for them. I'm married, bi, and my partner has no problem with me exploring these feelings. But I do, because I don't have an understanding of healthy relationships outside of the patriarchal hetero nuclear family. Please explain to me like I was 17 how to have healthy, queer, adult relationships. [more inside]
I was at a party yesterday, where the topic came to 'cultural differences'. My conversation partner remembered once hearing about research about American soldiers dating European women after WWII, and their differences in relationship progression. Now I can't find the article.. [more inside]
I apologise for the length, I want to try and include all the relevant details. [more inside]
After a couple of weeks in the online dating world, I'm pretty disheartened. It just moves too fast. No one wants to invest quality time in written communication. What's a sapiosexual to do? [more inside]
I ended a complicated and messy friendship a few days ago, and now I'm a wreck. I'm having enormous trouble processing my feelings and understanding where all of it is coming from, accepting that I've made my decision, and moving on. Did I overreact? Did I make a mistake? What should I be learning from this? What questions should I be asking myself? What else am I missing? [more inside]
I met a girl on Tinder, and we talked for a week before meeting up. However after a few dates, things are getting weird... [more inside]
Hi Metafilter! Once upon a time, I was in a relationship that ‘changed the game’ for me. I’ve been dwelling on how powerful it was ever since. We're friends again, but it's hard. Ideally: I’d like to keep the relationship, and change my attitude towards it, so that I have space to change my attitude towards life. Realistically: I know the best way would be to change my attitude towards life, and the focus on the relationship will follow. Hope me. Tough love me. [more inside]
A new employee (~1.5-2 mo) at our company called out yesterday because of a "family emergency." At 11:30pm last night, she sent her boss an email saying she quit, effective immediately. This is a management-level employee in her 30s, who otherwise seems quite stable. She responded to some texts from her boss last night (asking about the email), but has not responded to any phone calls and has not even been responding to texts today. I am worried for her safety at this point. What is the appropriate response? [more inside]
What are some tips on how to be fun with younger kids without getting exhausted?? I'm spending four days at the beach next week with my partner's niece and nephews. [more inside]
I'm meant to be attending a wedding in two months. I was invited to, and RSVP'ed for this wedding the better part of a year ago. A few months ago my long-term boyfriend and I broke up and now I'm not sure how to handle the wedding--can I cancel this late and how? [more inside]
A former student's sibling has died. I will be out of town for the memorial service but would like to let him know I am thinking of him. [more inside]
An observation goes around the internet which says, "When you're dead, you don't know you're dead. It's only uncomfortable for others. The same goes when you're stupid". This has the sound of a universal truth. I wonder what other things about us we are oblivious to, but are totally obvious to others?
I have a couple good friends who have upcoming birthdays. Last year I got them both introductory flight lessons, which they both loved. I've done indoor skydiving and jet boat rides (I'm in Portland, OR) previously. Any other great ideas out there for around $100?
Please recommend books for help with procrastination/self-defeating thinking; specifically the feeling that "it's too late" to do anything. [more inside]
I'm separated, divorce almost final. In the middle is a 9 y.o. with 50/50 custody (see some previous questions for some back story). Other Parent (OP) has history of alcohol and substance abuse, was/is in AA. Child recently had a discussion with me where they basically said "OP drinks beer and wine to 'get buzzed'." How do I manage this? I'd appreciate advice from anyone who has been in any of the positions in this current situation ... Thank you! [more inside]
I'm going to Italy soon, and will be traveling on a small but organized tour through the mountains. I'm relatively introverted. What are some things I can say to the organizer, other tour members, the (small) hotel operator/staff, or even strangers... when I'm feeling the need to recharge alone, but do not want to come across as rude? [more inside]
So my fella is in the Australian army, and deployed for 6 months to a big middle east American base (he is not a Mefi but knows my name here and I want to keep ideas a surprise). I can send parcels to him that are under 2kg to him for free (go Australia Post). He loves getting parcels from me but I need more ideas, please hope me .... [more inside]
I'm leaving my alcoholic spouse and need to find a new therapist. My current therapist (a LCSW) missed a ton of warning signs related to alcoholism within my relationship and family. He even admitted this. So, I'm looking for a recommendations, preferably someone who has experience or specializes in issues of codependency and alcoholism. Thanks for your help.
I have trouble finding a true, intimate, reliable female-female friendship, even when dealing with those who call me their "best friend." (Ha!) Please help me rule out all potential causes, including the possibility that I am somehow repellent in ways that only women my age can detect. (Men like me well enough, as do children, Baby Boomers, and senior citizens.) [more inside]