"I'm not going to change"
May 30, 2013 6:54 AM Subscribe
The other day I had already had a bad day when my husband made an insensitive and crappy remark about something. I replied with tears in my eyes and said that he really had no idea about [subject]. Husband ignored that and then 5 minutes later cheerfully asked if I wanted to watch tv. I said no. He was surprised that I was "still mad" and we tried to talk about it, but I shut down because I felt vulnerable and remembered past talkings where I always felt like "too sensitive" and nothing would change anyway. This time, my husband apparently also thought the same because he said "Well, if you're unhappy, maybe you don't want to continue this relationship, because I'm not going to change".
posted by anonymous to Human Relations (40 answers total) 14 users marked this as a favorite
I thought about writing a long he-said she-said askme, but figured that the details don't really matter. I then actually still wrote a long explanation, but I figure my actual problem is described in the paragraph above. And I wonder: if someone is so clear about not going to change, is that indeed a clear sign that we should move on? Even though we have been married for over ten years, have children together and I still love him?