Stupid brain, stop it.
January 23, 2013 2:03 PM Subscribe
I am done with letting limerence rule my life. Tell me your stories of conquering limerence. How did you cope? Is it even really possible to say "no more limerence" if you're prone to it?
posted by anonymous to human relations (15 answers total) 24 users marked this as a favorite
Recently I became limerent over a new friend. He returned my feelings, so we just fed off each other. This led to a state of almost indescribable euphoria. Every time I saw him, it just got crazier and crazier until it built up to a fever pitch. Couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, couldn't concentrate on anything.
However, I have a boyfriend too, and we've been together for more than a decade. He recognized that I was "falling in love" with this other guy, who he also knows. He sat me down and told me that this was not going to work for him and that I needed to make a decision about what I wanted.
I fell back to earth pretty quickly, and I can recognize it now for what it was. Then I start reflecting back on my life and I realized just how many times I have gone through something like this, going back to my teenage years. Reading more about limerence, I think that I seem to suffer from it over and over again. It's normally one-sided, so the guy becomes an obsession for awhile until it fades. In any case, it's a problem in my relationship because when I am the throes of it, I put this other person ahead of my boyfriend and that's not fair to him.
Well I am done with this. I'm angry that I let my stupid brain do this to me over and over again, with the pain that it causes me and my boyfriend.
I am planning to seek therapy, and my boyfriend and I are working on our relationship. But right now I could use some hope that I really can kick this habit. Have you successfully conquered limerence? Do you have any techniques to recognize it early and short-circuit it?
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