Over-thinking a plate of human beings.
November 29, 2011 6:37 AM Subscribe
You’re throwing a party. How do you invite some, but not all, members of one of your social circles with the minimal amount of hurt feelings and drama?
posted by bondcliff to Human Relations (34 answers total) 6 users marked this as a favorite
My wife and I are in the early stages of planning a holiday party. There will be various people from all our different social circles invited. We have one group that we belong to, for now let’s pretend it’s a choir, that consists of some pretty good friends, some acquaintances (some of whom might consider us friends), and some people we like but are just there. We're not worried about that last group. Fuck those guys.
Due to space constraints we can’t invite everyone, so we’d have to limit it to four or five friends from this group. However:
The friends might assume more people from the group are being invited, and might think nothing of saying “I’ll see you at the Bondcliff’s party!” to someone who was not invited. We've all done that, haven't we?
The acquaintance-friends, when finding out about the party, might be indifferent/confused/hurt/bummed or anything in between. We want to avoid this. We see all these people on a semi-weekly basis. We will see them between the time the invitations go out and the party. Awkward.
Do we add a little note to the invitations saying “Hey, keep it on the down-low because not everyone from The Happy Fun Choir is coming”? That seems tacky. Do we just invite who we invite and not worry about it? These are all grown-ups, should we just assume they’ll get over it or not care?