Help my bf's junk!
February 2, 2010 9:01 PM   Subscribe

Circumcision at 21. Should he? Are there different types of procedures for it?

My boyfriend is 21 and is uncircumcised. When we have sex, sometimes it is very painful to the point where he is bleeding where the skin is attached underneath. This of course leaves it out of commission for days at a time. There is no issue with the foreskin being too tight, only this attached part. Is it possible to get that part, dare I say, "snipped" without going for a full circumcision?

We had tried different lubes and other ways of getting it softened up and it comes to the point that when I'm going to pull it back (just a little) that he cringes and it makes me feel terrible.

He is very open to the idea of surgery to get this taken care of, and upon much googling of the different issues, they don't seem to be targeting this specific area. Is there a specific name for this type of procedure?

Thanks for any advice :)
posted by anonymous to Health & Fitness (14 answers total)

Make an appointment with a urologist. He or she can explain the options then perform the procedure.
posted by metahawk at 9:06 PM on February 2, 2010

Read this thread for related experiences.
posted by fake at 9:08 PM on February 2, 2010

Urologist. Urologist. Urologist.
posted by Jon_Evil at 9:08 PM on February 2, 2010

I am not a doctor. Your boyfriend may have phimosis. This can be treated with surgery, but often medical management can reduce or eliminate a need to move to a surgical option. Phimosis often responds well to a course of specifc topical steroids. You need to speak to a doctor - preferably a urologist. Emergencies can arise if this is untreated and subject to continual trauma and scarring.
posted by meehawl at 9:11 PM on February 2, 2010

Circumcision that late in life can be quite traumatic physically, and can affect sexual sensitivity (the penis is much less sensitive without the foreskin, and he's developed sexually with a foreskin, so it could be difficult for him afterwards). He needs to consult thoroughly with doctors before taking such a drastic step. I don't know about the availability of halfway options. Good luck.
posted by Dasein at 9:17 PM on February 2, 2010

Yes, please see a doctor. I actually suggest making appointments with two--it's his penis! Second opinions are awesome! And do a lot of research to find out the side effects/complications of whatever treatment he chooses, before he does it. I find that doctors tend to gloss over things that are really important when it comes to sexual health.
posted by kathrineg at 9:33 PM on February 2, 2010

I've had 2 friends who were circumcised as adults(1 for religious reasons, 1 for medical reasons), and they do not report deep trauma. He should talk to more than 1 urologist, and ask to talk to patients who've had this surgery, if possible. He should see if there's a lesser surgical option, or a non-surgical option. Circumcision is a volatile topic and many people have strong opinions. Facts will help. The medical specialty for this is urology.
posted by theora55 at 9:35 PM on February 2, 2010

My ex-husband suffered from phimosis and had a circumcision in his early 30s. He's very happy he did it.
posted by Majorita at 9:35 PM on February 2, 2010

You say that it's not phimosis; is it your bf's frenulum that is too tight / too short? AIUI that can be easily snipped without a full circumcision. See a urologist, obviously, but I think it's a minor thing, medically speaking.

(Regarding the circumcision derail: I too have a FOAF who was circumcised late in life, foreskin cancer or something like that, and he said the circumcision didn't have a big effect on his sex life / enjoyment. I expect mileage varies.)
posted by hattifattener at 10:16 PM on February 2, 2010

Urologist. Possibly a second opinion, too: there's always a certain amount of received opinion passed down the medical profession which shapes the choice of treatment, and the whole foreskin thing is more subject to that than most, particularly in the US. The problem sounds more, um, banjo-string related, which can potentially be treated surgically without full circumcision.
posted by holgate at 10:27 PM on February 2, 2010 [2 favorites]

Pretty major body revision. I would talk to multiple drs. on this first. There exists a lot of politics here and you won't know until you have obtained multiple opinions.
posted by caddis at 11:12 PM on February 2, 2010

As others have said, he may not need a circumcision. A urologist or two should be able to offer better informed opinions, especially after examining more closely.

That said, I was circumcised at 21. It was no big deal, really, despite all the scare literature out there. My sex life was not noticeably different from before the operation.

The only difficult part was also somewhat comical. Since you're all bandaged up down there, the doctor requested that I try and avoid having an erection for a few weeks. Well, its sort of like asking someone not to think of elephants.
posted by vacapinta at 1:43 AM on February 3, 2010 [1 favorite]

Echoing everyone comments to see more than one doctor to discuss this properly. Your boyfriend might also find this guy's experience to be interesting reading.
posted by turkeyphant at 3:55 AM on February 3, 2010

I am 20 and undergoing the procedure in two weeks- gathering more information and consulting medical advice is certainly the way to go.
posted by malusmoriendumest at 4:26 AM on February 3, 2010

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