Is it possible to have a normal relationship after a spouce attempts suicide?
January 3, 2008 10:03 AM Subscribe
My wife and I have been married for almost 10 months. She has had a number of cutting epsiodes and last week she tried to commit suicide. After I caught her cutting the first time (about 3 months into the marriage) she agreed to go into therapy and got on Prozac but things have not really gotten better. With things this bad, this early on in the relationship is there really any hope?
posted by prk14 to human relations (50 answers total) 10 users marked this as a favorite
Here is the situation from the begining. I'm 26, she is 24 she is not pregnant and we do not have any children. She did a very good job hidding the depression while we were dating but in retrospect I should have seen some of the warning signs while we were engaged. After we were married the depression became obvious, with her completely letting herself go, and a manifest loss of interest in everything she used to enjoy (running, painting, etc) sleeping seemed to be the only thing that she enjoy. This started to cause some real friction in the relationship as she refused to see that anything was wrong and blamed me for not being patient enough with her. I cought her cutting her shoulders and refused to let her rationalize it away and insisted that she start seeing a therapist. She got on prozac. first 20mg, then 40mg then 60mg. Everytime she had the dose upgraded she had about a week of "normal" interaction but then is was back to a complete loss of interest. Last week stoped taking her meds, felt fine for a couple fo days and then took about half a bottle of loratabs that we had lying around from a shoulder injury a while back. Not enough to really do her in but still... I called 911 they took her to the ER and gave her a charcoal tube to eat, gave her some crysis councelling and sent her on her way. her doctor has since included 300mg of Wellbutrin to the Prozac and we are seeing a marriage councelor as well as her seeing her personal therapist. She recently moved back in with her parents because she said that I am not being supportive enough of her struggles.
At this point I really dont have a whole lot of faith let for the relationship. For almost a year now I have been miserable and hoping that she will be able to conquer her deamons. But at this point I feel almost ready to cut my losses and get out of the relationshipI feel guilty for having these feelings. I know that this really is not her fault, she didnt ask be have chemical issues in her brain but that does not really help me thorugh the daily misery.
My question is this: is there really any overcomming this kind of problem? I look to the future and I would be devastated if she had another suicide attempt (or heavens forbid a sucessful one) when/if we have children. I don't feel comfortable raising children in a home where thier mother cuts herself to relieve stress. Has anyone dealt with these types of feelings? Any advise?