Songs About Incompetence

May 21, 2007 5:23 PM

Seeking songs about incompetence.

I'm gathering a playlist for a work event, so preferably the songs are both clean and well-known. The obvious ones are Beck's "Loser," the Beatles' "I'm a Loser," and Radiohead's "Creep." Also preferably, the songs are NOT obviously about being a loser at love, or being a drug addict/alchoholic -- think more general ineptitude/laziness/suckiness/loserhood/weakness, either from a self-deprecating perspective or putting someone else down. I feel like there's got to be plenty in the hip-hop, novelty/humor, and classic country/bluegrass genres that I'm just not thinking of.

posted by kmel to media & arts (51 comments total)

You're Pitiful by Weird Al (Get the mp3 towards the bottom of the page)
Parody of "You're Beautiful" by James Blunt
posted by niles at 5:34 PM on May 21, 2007

Uncle Tupelo's Watch Me Fall
posted by dog food sugar at 5:36 PM on May 21, 2007

The Las - Failure (jangly Brit guitar rock)

Also see: the blues.
posted by wilko at 5:37 PM on May 21, 2007

Teenage Dirtbag - Wheatus
Dumb - Nirvana
Negative Creep - Nirvana
Underwhelmed - Sloan
Creep - Stone Temple Pilots
posted by booner at 5:38 PM on May 21, 2007

"Bad Karma", Warren Zevon.
posted by dilettante at 5:40 PM on May 21, 2007

"Self Esteem" by The Offspring
posted by L. Fitzgerald Sjoberg at 5:40 PM on May 21, 2007

Brendan Benson - Most Unfortunate Guy, Feel Like Myself, Meaning to Write
posted by amethysts at 5:41 PM on May 21, 2007

Basketcase - Green day
posted by perpetualstroll at 5:43 PM on May 21, 2007

Jonathon Coulton has a couple songs that might fit the bill. "Screwed" and "Big Bad World One" come to mind. I think "Soft Rocked By Me is a hilarious loser song, but it's more specifically about romance.
posted by L. Fitzgerald Sjoberg at 5:50 PM on May 21, 2007

I've Got Friends in Low Places--Garth Brooks
Stupid Girls--Pink
Lazybones--Leon Redbone
posted by misha at 5:55 PM on May 21, 2007

@perpetualstroll
I don't know if Basketcase is work appropriate.
posted by rancidchickn at 5:55 PM on May 21, 2007

"What's My Age Again?" Blink 182
posted by jamaro at 5:59 PM on May 21, 2007

Lou Reed - "Average Guy," from The Blue Mask. Pretty mellow as far as self-deprecation goes... Lou's running down an 'average guy' checklist ("My temperature's ninety-eight point-two"), but would work well in this context.
posted by porn in the woods at 6:02 PM on May 21, 2007

The Happy Prole - Quasi
posted by quentiniii at 6:04 PM on May 21, 2007

A little bit dated and not at all clean, but "The Ass and the Hole," by Mac McAnally (and Jimmy Buffett) is pretty awesome.
posted by Cyrano at 6:10 PM on May 21, 2007

Funny, I wasn't originally going to post it because it's neither clean nor well-known, but I initially thought of Quasi's "You Fucked Yourself."
posted by themadjuggler at 6:13 PM on May 21, 2007

the offspring - why don't you get a job
posted by ronmexico at 6:13 PM on May 21, 2007

"Idiot Boyfriend" by Jimmy Fallon
posted by Pater Aletheias at 6:19 PM on May 21, 2007

All the good ones I know aren't well-known, sorry. Worth mentioning anyway are Sebadoh, who pretty much owned the losercore genre in the early 90s, and twee-popsters Wimp Factor 14, who had a bunch of great songs about incompetence at work; the best is their 1992 single "Botch," but "I is for Incomplete" (you can hear most of it here) is almost as good - a hilarious song about writing a terrible term paper:

My conclusions are watered down
My arguments built around
all these generalities...
posted by mediareport at 6:20 PM on May 21, 2007

From the Avenue Q Soundtrack: "What do you do with a BA in English?" and "It Sucks to be Me" (if you can get an edited version...that's got the f-word) and maybe "There is a Life Outside Your Apartment"
posted by landedjentry at 6:21 PM on May 21, 2007

The Bevis Frond: "Will to Lose" is pretty spot-on, I think.

The chorus:

You
You look like the kind of guy
The kind of inconclusive waste of space that we can use

You
You've got just the right approach
You've got this all-consuming, overpowering will to lose
posted by flabdablet at 6:28 PM on May 21, 2007

Cream and Bastards Rise - Harvey Danger
posted by logicpunk at 6:45 PM on May 21, 2007

Ben Folds Five - The Army
posted by nerdcore at 6:48 PM on May 21, 2007

Dropout- The Flaming Lips
posted by kimdog at 6:51 PM on May 21, 2007

Also "Girl Anachronism" by the Dresden Dolls, in a weird sort of way.
posted by L. Fitzgerald Sjoberg at 6:53 PM on May 21, 2007

Where to start?
posted by rhizome at 6:55 PM on May 21, 2007

"Heroes" by Jill Sobule:

"Why are all our heroes so imperfect
Why do they always bring me down...

William Faulkner drunk and depressed
Dorothy Parker mean, drunk and depressed
And that guy in Seven Years in Tibet turned out to be a nazi
The founding fathers all had slaves, the explorers slaughtered the braves,
The Old Testament God can be so petty

Paul McCartney jealous of John, even more so now that he's gone
Dylan was so mean to Donovan in that movie
Pablo Picasso cruel to his wives
My favorite poets took their own lives
Orson Welles peaked at 25, ballooned before our eyes
and he sold bad wine

Heard Babe Ruth was full of malice
Lewis Carroll I'm sure did Alice
Plato in the cave with those very young boys
TS Elliott hated Jews, FDR didn't save the Jews
All the French joined the resistance after the war
Raymond Chandler drunk and depressed
Tennessee Williams drunk and depressed
Think I'll just get drunk and depressed."
posted by hermitosis at 6:55 PM on May 21, 2007

"Ballad of a Thin Man" by Bob Dylan. That's the one with the refrain "Something is happening here, but you don't know what it is, do you Mr. Jones?"
posted by L. Fitzgerald Sjoberg at 7:10 PM on May 21, 2007

George Thoroughgood - Get A Haircut And Get A Real Job
posted by crazycanuck at 7:17 PM on May 21, 2007

When I Was Dumb by the Bottle Rockets.
posted by altcountryman at 7:27 PM on May 21, 2007

I've Got The Will to Fail (mp3)
posted by grumblebee at 7:33 PM on May 21, 2007 [1 favorite]

Also preferably, the songs are NOT obviously about being a loser at love, or being a drug addict/alchoholic

I guess that rules out a lot of Cracker.

Have you ever heard any Rehab? They might also be too obvious, but Sittin' At a Bar is a good one.
posted by peeedro at 7:34 PM on May 21, 2007

This previous askme thread might have some stuff for you.

Black Flag - Wasted (covered nicely by Camper Van Beethovan)
Pere Ubu - Final Solution
Pansy Division - Bad Boyfriend
posted by hydrophonic at 7:36 PM on May 21, 2007

(Don't want to be a) Fat Man- Jethro tull
I can't Stand up (for falling down) - Elvis Costello
Two Left Feet - Richard Thompson
Road to nowhere- Talking Heads
posted by Gungho at 7:57 PM on May 21, 2007

Ben Folds - Rockin' the Suburbs

or,

MC 900 Foot Jesus - Adventures In Failure

...pondering the wonderful thing called marriage
I accidentally back the car into a baby carriage
'scuse me ma'am I'd love to stay and chat
but watch where you're going next time you old bat
I hit the gas and zoom down the block
leave 'er in the dust yellin' for the cops
swervin' round a corner tryin' to steer
I get so excited I almost spill my beer
a neighbourhood dog is yappin' at my bumper
so I slam on the brakes and I hear a big thump
I jump the curb and land up on a lawn
then I finish my beer and turn the radio on
some idiot's goin' on about rehab
I grab a brew and yank on the pull tab
here comes a little old lady with a shot gun
I put the pedal to the metal and she runs
digging on my off-road driving power
I do a donut in a bed of flowers
then I jerk the wheel a little too hard
the car rolls over and over on out of the yard

(Causin' much destruction)

I come to rest in the middle of the street
a bunch of empty beer cans rattlin' at my feet
starin' in the window is a nosy little brat
I look him in the eyes and say "I meant to do that"...

posted by NortonDC at 8:17 PM on May 21, 2007

Nerf Herder - Sorry

(sorry I showed up at your party
sorry I drank up all the bacardi
sorry I puked up on your bedspread
sorry I wanted to be your boyfriend

what can I do...it's over, it's over, it's over, it's over!
what can I do...I am the loser)
posted by jacalata at 8:31 PM on May 21, 2007

Neil Young - Fuckin' Up
posted by Arch_Stanton at 8:40 PM on May 21, 2007

"I Wish" by Skee-Lo.
posted by sellout at 9:03 PM on May 21, 2007

Blur - Charmless Man
posted by Windigo at 10:12 PM on May 21, 2007

David Bowie's famous song on "Extras."
posted by wireless at 10:51 PM on May 21, 2007 [1 favorite]

Limblifter's I Screwed Up is my immediate thought. I'll check around to find others.

Left Wing Fascists— I Drive a Yugo. Also, their song K-Mart Shopper.
posted by klangklangston at 12:23 AM on May 22, 2007

Don't know how well known it is in the States, but Right Said Fred is a fun song about two incompetent and lazy piano movers.
posted by teleskiving at 12:43 AM on May 22, 2007

"In Spite Of Ourselves" - John Prine & Iris Dement.
posted by Jofus at 1:50 AM on May 22, 2007

bronze medal by idlewild. it's all about wanting to come in third.
posted by indienial at 2:01 AM on May 22, 2007

Superchunk - Slack Motherfucker
posted by Andy Harwood at 6:01 AM on May 22, 2007

Actually lots of Ben Folds Five. Army, Your Redneck Past, Battle of Who Could Care Less
posted by dagnyscott at 6:19 AM on May 22, 2007

Not Big - Lily Allen
posted by Lorna at 6:43 AM on May 22, 2007

Dare To Be Stupid. - Weird Al.

This is a requirement, kmel! This is not an option!
posted by cashman at 6:56 AM on May 22, 2007

If it's for play at work, it might not be a stretch to use "I love my boss" by Moxy Fruvous.

"He pays me minimum wage / It's all I deserve at this stage / Some union hacks said I should ask for more / I answered with suitable rage."
posted by JMOZ at 8:02 AM on May 22, 2007

"Thank you for making me beg" by The Apartments. The first line is "Here's to the losers..." It's availabe at the iTunes music store. (Not that I'm plugging that but it's hard to find otherwise.)
posted by strangeleftydoublethink at 9:31 AM on May 22, 2007

XTC's "The Mayor of Simpleton"

A perfect song, with perfect lyrics.
posted by melorama at 10:50 AM on May 22, 2007