Are we too young?
September 24, 2006 7:02 AM Subscribe
LongDistanceFilter: Ok, well technically we're broken up but its purely for strategic reasons. But we both believe that we both have serious long term potencial, the only problem is that circumstances are against us.
posted by apfel to human relations (17 answers total) 5 users marked this as a favorite
Ho boy, I know you guys love these.
I'm 21, he's 20. This is a major factor, how young we are. We've known each other for a year and had been dating for 7mo before he left. Simply put, this is the healthiest, most fulfulling relationship I've had yet. We work extremely well together, problem solve well together, intense physical attraction, respectful, mature, the list goes on.
I am by no means an idealist. I've considered every possible situation with great skepticism. I don't want to get into something that is based on a fantasy. I know deciding who you want to be with for the rest of your life isn't easy, and living out that time isn't easy either.
The other side? He's gone for an academic year, 4 months in the UK, 5 in France. This is my senior year at college, I'll be graduating by the time he comes back. Granted I'll be within an hour reach when he's home again but we don't know how long that will last. We both want to go to grad school, we haven't a plan for ourselves, let alone our future. All we know is that we want this to continue. We've both decided to break up so we are able to make the best of our situations, my senior year, his year abroad. We've accepted the fact that we may fool around with other people, that is understandable.
However we've both got it in for each other real bad. We've discussed what the future may hold already, but we're both freaked out because we're so young. That said, I still can't see myself leading a life without him.
I'm just starting to think this may be a disasterous situation once our luck has been pulled out from us. The last thing I want is to have a falling out with him because the stress became too great.
I've read about other MeFites who've had long distances relationships going on for years, let alone our paltry 9 mo. Read that people doubt their marriages soon after they've got em. I've done a lot of reading to make sure I don't screw things up. But it's just reading.
This is the biggest thing for me yet. We're both doubting our decision to break up, that's natural. Would getting together be a bad move, guys? Would it be a bad move to get into such a serious relationship so soon?