Do straight guys ever eat their own come after masturbating?

May 17, 2006 1:54 PM

Do straight guys ever eat their own come after masturbating?

I've seen it in amateur gay porn videos, Edmund White mentions doing it in A Boy's Own Story, and (too much information?) I know I do it. But is this something a straight guy might do? Or does it have nothing to do with sexual orientation?

posted by fugitivefromchaingang to human relations (74 comments total)

Not on purpose.
posted by horsewithnoname at 1:59 PM on May 17, 2006

Nothing to do with orientation, everything to do with the individual.

Personally, I think it's perfectly normal, though certainly not everyone does it.
posted by utsutsu at 2:00 PM on May 17, 2006

I've heard it being advertized as the cheapest form of doping, in the gym I frequented.

And the local gays went to the other gym.

There may be more urban legends about the effect sperm swallowing has.
posted by ijsbrand at 2:04 PM on May 17, 2006

Jesus Hell no. Ever wonder why men are always so angry and aggressive before sex and so relaxed afterwards? It's because semen is liquid evil mixed with pure hate - I've seen women bleed for days after eating it.

In seriousness - no, I have never tasted mine, and I never will. I think this has nothing to do with sexual orientation per se so much as it has to do with sociological implications regarding sexual orientation and the associated impact on self-identity. Also personal preference.
posted by Ryvar at 2:07 PM on May 17, 2006 [1 favorite has favorites]

So is like a polling question? I myself find the practice pretty disgusting.
posted by puke & cry at 2:13 PM on May 17, 2006

Yes, straight guys eat their own come.
posted by Specklet at 2:14 PM on May 17, 2006

(too much information?)

Yes. Dear God, yes.

What? I answered his question.
posted by CunningLinguist at 2:22 PM on May 17, 2006

I myself find the practice pretty disgusting.

No snark/offense intended, but I find this baffling (admittedly in an amused way). You won't taste/swallow something you'd expect any partner giving you oral sex to taste/swallow? In other words, it's disgusting if it goes in your mouth, but (presumably) not disgusting if it goes in your partner's mouth? (Again, not trying to be aggressive -- just trying to understand!)
posted by scody at 2:23 PM on May 17, 2006

what's the point? I mean, it's not that you're sucking yourself off, so, really, why?
posted by matteo at 2:24 PM on May 17, 2006

it's disgusting if it goes in your mouth, but (presumably) not disgusting if it goes in your partner's mouth

it's a double standard, true. but the key issue here, straight men (unless they're Ron Jeremy) cannot give themselves fellatio, so their come by definition ends anywhere but in their mouths anyway. why taking steps to actually eat it?
posted by matteo at 2:26 PM on May 17, 2006

I don't quite get it. Why? Why would you? I can't imagine it tasting very good.

What motivation is there for imbibing one's own love juices? Seriously, I'd like to know.
posted by cyrusdogstar at 2:28 PM on May 17, 2006

I don't know, just my first reaction. I guess if I were sucking cock I'd like it.
posted by puke & cry at 2:28 PM on May 17, 2006

In other words, it's disgusting if it goes in your mouth, but (presumably) not disgusting if it goes in your partner's mouth?

Yes, that is exactly correct. I have been terribly clear about this point with my wife, which she finds extremely funny.
posted by Ryvar at 2:29 PM on May 17, 2006

I think men's aversion to semen is similar to those women who react negatively to kissing a man who's covered in her juices. Everytime I think about the act I shudder; it's a visceral response, but socially trained, I'm sure.
posted by SeizeTheDay at 2:30 PM on May 17, 2006

Sorry for the further derail - I'm fine with womans juices. Presumably woman don't like sucking their own juices?
posted by puke & cry at 2:31 PM on May 17, 2006

Just watch the final scene of I Dream of Jenna, and you'll have your answer. No, I'm so not going there for the link... not now at least.
posted by tweak at 2:31 PM on May 17, 2006

I guess if I were sucking cock I'd like it.

yes, but the question is Do straight guys ever eat their own come. you're not a straight guy if you suck cock, you're either bi or gay
in Antarctica, cum freezes almost immediately, you could probably suck on a semen popsicle if you're into that

2 users marked this as a favorite: chiababe, puke & cry

it made me roffle
posted by PenguinBukkake at 2:31 PM on May 17, 2006

I think SeizeTheDay is right on.
posted by tentacle at 2:33 PM on May 17, 2006

Hell, I have. Enough ladies have consumed it without complaint that it couldn't be all that bad.

If you try it after having consumed a great deal of candy of fruit juice, it can taste kind of sweet. I wouldn't want to find it on the inside of a truffle or anything, but it's probably one of the best-tasting bodily emissions (that I've tried), and the closest to eating babies most of us gets a chance to have.

Also, if you've ever eaten anything after masturbating without washing your hands, you've eaten some too!
posted by Durhey at 2:34 PM on May 17, 2006

I try to avoid ingesting any of my bodily fluids.
posted by DieHipsterDie at 2:36 PM on May 17, 2006

it's disgusting if it goes in your mouth, but (presumably) not disgusting if it goes in your partner's mouth

Right. And this doesn't strike me as a "double standard." It's just a difference in preferences between (some) straight men and (some) straight women.

There are all kinds of things I like having done to my male parts that I wouldn't like doing to other male parts -- even my own. I'm turned off by male parts and turned on by female parts. I know that sexuality can be complicated, but isn't that pretty much the definition of a straight man? For me, anyway, being straight is that simple and boring.

By the way, I also like cooking mushrooms for my wife, because she likes them so much -- but I don't like eating them myself.
posted by grumblebee at 2:44 PM on May 17, 2006

I try to avoid ingesting any of my bodily fluids.

Excepting saliva, one assumes.
posted by Bud Dickman at 2:47 PM on May 17, 2006

No.
posted by delmoi at 2:47 PM on May 17, 2006

No, and I don't eat my hair, scabs, or boogers either.
posted by Afroblanco at 2:48 PM on May 17, 2006

You won't taste/swallow something you'd expect any partner giving you oral sex to taste/swallow? In other words, it's disgusting if it goes in your mouth, but (presumably) not disgusting if it goes in your partner's mouth?

Yes, that is exactly correct.
posted by delmoi at 2:49 PM on May 17, 2006

To offer a woman's perspective--I'm okay with my own juices.

However I would not collect it and drink it for power as I once saw in an "art" film.
posted by killjoy at 2:49 PM on May 17, 2006

"In other words, it's disgusting if it goes in your mouth, but (presumably) not disgusting if it goes in your partner's mouth?"

No, it's disgusting in her mouth too. She's just good enough to put up with it.
posted by klangklangston at 3:00 PM on May 17, 2006

I've eaten dog food to find out what it tastes like, but nothing about it made me want to try it again. It wasn't revolting; it was just, ehh. On the other hand, I can't imagine never trying it; aren't you curious? What do you have to lose? What's the worst that happens?

On the other hand, I haven't drunk my own urine and probably won't. There's a block there that curiosity won't break.

After much thought, I think I'd put my own semen somewhere between dog food and my own urine. Closer to dog food.

Thanks for asking.
posted by argybarg at 3:04 PM on May 17, 2006

Fascinating! I don't think of semen as disgusting (indeed, I am on very friendly terms with it), so it wouldn't even occur to me that there'd be men who thought it was disgusting in any context. I guess I know what scodyboy and I will be discussing over dinner tonight.
posted by scody at 3:08 PM on May 17, 2006

Yes, some straight guys do. He put on a show for me and it was actually disgusting in a way. But I'm alright with kissing a man with my juices on his face.
posted by googlebombed at 3:11 PM on May 17, 2006

Anecdote: I knew a girl whose boyfriend used to blow it on her chest and then lick it off, FWIW.

I feel very strange now.
posted by tweak at 3:17 PM on May 17, 2006

Dave Matthews, before Dave Matthews Band, once performed a song he wrote called "Next Time I'm Gonna Eat It" at open-mic night at Eastern Standard, a restaurant in Charlottesville.

I can't believe I had an opportunity to use that bit of trivia.
posted by waldo at 3:22 PM on May 17, 2006

Anecdote: I knew a girl whose boyfriend used to blow it on her chest and then lick it off, FWIW.

Me too.

To answer your question: I have not yet taken advantage of the literally thousands of opportunities I've had to do so.
Never crossed my mind. I know for sure that some men do, and wouldn't be surprised to learn that a sizeable precentage either do so regularly, or have done.

I feel very strange now.

Me too.
posted by kosem at 3:28 PM on May 17, 2006

I'm not straight, but I've never eaten my own come. I tasted it, once, and that was enough for me. I have hit myself in the face with it, but that was unintentional.

But other guys' come, that's a different story. I have no problem with that. Until I come myself, after which it all seems quite disgusting, no matter whose it is.
posted by me & my monkey at 3:34 PM on May 17, 2006

No snark/offense intended, but I find this baffling (admittedly in an amused way). You won't taste/swallow something you'd expect any partner giving you oral sex to taste/swallow?

I can't see why it would be baffling. I fully expect someone giving me oral pleasure to be sucking cock; viz, mine. If not, she is doing it very badly. But yet, I have no interest in sucking cock. Likewise, I expect anyone I'm getting it on with to be penetrated by a penis, but yet I have no interest myself in being penetrated by a penis.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 3:34 PM on May 17, 2006 [1 favorite has favorites]

I would expect that if this question were to be posed to Dan Savage, you would learn that this is a practice in which thousands, if not millions, of straight men regularly engage for every imaginable purpose.

(I don't do this.)
posted by Faint of Butt at 3:40 PM on May 17, 2006

I would expect that if this question were to be posed to Dan Savage, you would learn that this is a practice in which thousands, if not millions, of straight men regularly engage for every imaginable purpose.

If you pose this question to Craigslist, you would learn that plenty of self-identified straight guys love to suck a dick every once in a while, when the gf is out of town.
posted by me & my monkey at 3:42 PM on May 17, 2006

I can't see why it would be baffling. I fully expect someone giving me oral pleasure to be sucking cock; viz, mine. If not, she is doing it very badly. But yet, I have no interest in sucking cock.

But the question is not about sucking cock (either your own or anyone else's); the question is about having tasted/eaten your own semen after masturbating, presumably by licking it off your fingers.
posted by scody at 3:45 PM on May 17, 2006

I tried it once, 'cause I'm the curious sort. Not unpleasant, but not something I've ever had the urge to do again. Really guys, how can you ask somebody to do something you are not prepared to do yourself?
posted by lekvar at 3:53 PM on May 17, 2006

Are you kidding? I'm not prepared to have a penis in any of my orifices, either, but I'd expect any woman I'm sexually involved with to be okay with penetrative sex.
posted by Justinian at 3:59 PM on May 17, 2006

This idea came up once in a conversation I had in high school and the only response I remember was, "I've thought about trying it, but I'm afraid. What if I really, really like it?"
posted by mullacc at 4:00 PM on May 17, 2006 [2 favorites has favorites]

Or, to look at it from another angle, the equivalent of expecting a woman to be okay with performing oral sex on you is being willing to perform oral sex on the woman. It's not being willing to eat your own semen. Sheesh.
posted by Justinian at 4:01 PM on May 17, 2006

See, that's the thing, Justinian. I am comfortable with penatrative sex. Really, you'll never know what you may like if you never try.
posted by lekvar at 4:03 PM on May 17, 2006

With a certain beau, I understood perfectly well his desire not to ingest his own excretia, but the situation became ridiculous when it got to the point of him being so phobic (or homophobic, as the case may be) after fellatio that he wanted me to stop engaging in further sexual activity and go brush my teeth. So I couldn't kiss him in the throes of my own passion because 5/10/15 minutes ago, I'd had semen in my mouth. Nevermind that it was long gone, it had once been there and my mouth was forever tainted until I'd re-sanitized it.

So, naturally, I now find it attractive that a man might actually not have a problem with tasting his own semen, and have known several straight men who have no problem doing so.

And those who are comparing semen to phlegm, scabs, etc.? You're pretty much saying that any woman who goes down on you would be okay with eating your boogers. I'm pretty sure that's not the case, and I don't suggest ever mentioning that to her if you want her to keep going down on you.
posted by i feel possessed at 4:08 PM on May 17, 2006

Here I will answer your question and preëmpt all similar questions in the future:

Are there people with any arbitrary combination of sexual proclivities/preferences/kinks?

Yes.

So the real question is "how common is this?"

To this particular question I'd say "so-so". There's no real way to collect accurate statistics on this kind of stuff because people lie out of embarassment all the time.

I, being a straight guy, kind of assumed that most other straight guys had at least tried a taste, out of empathic curiosity.
posted by aubilenon at 4:14 PM on May 17, 2006

I, being a straight guy, kind of assumed that most other straight guys had at least tried a taste, out of empathic curiosity.

Me too. I know I've had a taste. I wouldn't put it on my tacos or anything, but it's not really that disgusting. It's just cum.
posted by I Love Tacos at 4:22 PM on May 17, 2006 [1 favorite has favorites]

Perhaps I'm misunderstanding the question? I see a divide between "a taste" and "eating your own cum". The second strikes me as a sort of sexual activity in and of itself.
posted by Justinian at 4:25 PM on May 17, 2006

But the question is not about sucking cock (either your own or anyone else's); the question is about having tasted/eaten your own semen after masturbating, presumably by licking it off your fingers.

But you seem to find it baffling that men might not want to do something that they'd like women to do. This isn't baffling, it's a commonplace and ordinary part of two heterosexual people fucking.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 4:35 PM on May 17, 2006

Taste it? Why not incorporate it into your recipes?

From Nov. 2004: Cooking with cum, only because I wanted to say "Guess who's coming on dinner" again.
posted by emelenjr at 4:41 PM on May 17, 2006

If you're in a hurry, perhaps in a situation where you might be discovered, it provides a thorough and quick disposal method.
posted by beerbajay at 5:01 PM on May 17, 2006

The combination of the fact that I don't like the trees that smell like come, and the fact that come has the consistency of snot, which I know I don't like in my mouth, has led me to believe that I will never try it.
While I can place it between dog food and urine, I haven't tried either of those.
posted by klangklangston at 5:04 PM on May 17, 2006

On the other hand, I haven't drunk my own urine and probably won't. There's a block there that curiosity won't break.

See, now—I've never consumed either, and don't particularly intend to, but neither are horrifying propositions, either. But if it was an either/or situation, I'd be more inclined to drink some urine. It's sterile, and has the advantage of not being sort of yechy in texture—I dislike yechy a great deal.
posted by cortex at 6:08 PM on May 17, 2006

(data point: straight)
posted by cortex at 6:08 PM on May 17, 2006

On the other hand, I can't imagine never trying it; aren't you curious? What do you have to lose? What's the worst that happens?

You could try it, enjoy/hate it so much that your eyes roll back in your head, you lose your balance, fall backwards over the kitchen chair, and tumble out the window of your 47th floor apartment onto the parked cars below. I'm pretty sure that's the worse that could happen.
posted by bjork24 at 6:13 PM on May 17, 2006

The combination of the fact that I don't like the trees that smell like come...

What trees smell like come?
posted by honeyx at 6:37 PM on May 17, 2006

Occasionally, depends on if I'm in the mood.
posted by tellurian at 6:53 PM on May 17, 2006

I don't know what they're called. They have small white flowers and yellow pollen that gets everywhere. And while they're blooming they have the overwhelming version of the same smell that come has. We have a couple of streets that just reek of come every year...
And while I haven't been able to ever find out exactly what kind of trees they are, everyone who I've ever pointed it out to has said "Yeah, they do smell like come." So it's not just me.
posted by klangklangston at 6:55 PM on May 17, 2006

What trees smell like come?
The Chinese Chesnut.
posted by tellurian at 6:59 PM on May 17, 2006

Bradford Pear trees (Ctrl+F for Bradford Pear)
posted by chiababe at 7:00 PM on May 17, 2006

It is definitely not just klang. Spring smells like semen.
posted by cortex at 7:03 PM on May 17, 2006

Spring smells like semen.

It can't be a coincidence that the pollen smells like semen (I smell it too) and that I'm horny as hell in the Spring. But perhaps I've said too much...
posted by SeizeTheDay at 7:09 PM on May 17, 2006

There's a conversation about this very topic in Samuel Delany's novel Dhalgren.

The answer's yes, of course.
posted by ikkyu2 at 7:36 PM on May 17, 2006

Ugh, I remember the smell of the Bradford Pears - there's two giant ones on Bellevue Way SE in Bellevue just east of Seattle that I walked by nearly every day for a year.
posted by Ryvar at 7:37 PM on May 17, 2006

mmff rmfff cssssslurp lick lick.

what was the question again?

............ mmmm salty miniature tadpoles
posted by lalochezia at 8:08 PM on May 17, 2006

That pollen and semen smell similarly isn't strange, considering that their functions are pretty similar...

I think the trees are the Bradford pears. Maybe I'll call the Parks Dept. tomorrow and have an uncomfortable conversation.
posted by klangklangston at 8:25 PM on May 17, 2006

"Hello, Parks Department? Do you know any straight guys who eat their own semen?"
posted by oneirodynia at 8:32 PM on May 17, 2006 [7 favorites has favorites]

best thred evar
posted by jdg at 10:07 PM on May 17, 2006

There are trees here that smell wonderful in the spring. But not come-ish.

Too bad we don't have smell-o-web yet, because I'm fascinated by the come tree.

Paging Shel Silverstein.
posted by Bud Dickman at 11:05 PM on May 17, 2006

This thread would not be complete without the mention of the Snowball guy told of in Clerks.
posted by beth at 11:38 PM on May 17, 2006

It has never occurred to me to try.

Picking up on argybarg's spectrum of Possibly Gross Things We Haven't Eaten, I would place it much closer to urine than dog food. I'm not big into sticky foods-- for example, I prefer plain croissants to croissants with sticky white goo on them. And I'm willing to bet that croissant goo tastes much better.

me & my monkey has a good point, too-- after you've come, all of a sudden things that seemed like a really good idea 30 seconds before can seem kinda gross. So, with the irrationality of desire diminished, why eat something of a snottish consistency that probably doesn't taste very good?

(straight, male)
posted by ibmcginty at 6:43 AM on May 18, 2006

Yes. And some people eat poop and drink pee, theirs or others. I have long since given up ruling anything out where humans are concerned.
posted by meehawl at 8:22 AM on May 18, 2006

This thread would not be complete without the mention of the Snowball guy told of in Clerks. - beth

Stole the words from my fingertips.\

Of course there are guys that have tasted it. And some of them liked it and some of them didn't. Perhaps you're asking if it's common? As meehawl said, don't rule out anything as a possible fetish.
posted by raedyn at 8:43 AM on May 18, 2006

So now I wonder who has tried it since this thread...
posted by nadawi at 5:43 PM on June 10, 2006 [1 favorite has favorites]

Anecdote: I knew a girl whose boyfriend used to blow it on her chest and then lick it off, FWIW.

You know my girlfriend?
posted by The Great Big Mulp at 2:18 PM on August 20, 2006