Literary works about large friend group dynamics changing over time
June 30, 2022 9:27 AM Subscribe
I'm looking for fiction/literary non-fiction about friend groups (3+ ppl) and how they change over time. I'm interested in going beyond portrayals - I'm seeking writing that's psychologically rich and centers plumbing the depths of how friendships change people. Very open to speculative fiction as well!
I'm interested in exploring fiction or literary non-fiction about "large" friend groups and their dynamics, 3 friends or more. I've read A Little Life by Hanya Yanagihara and that's something I'm looking for. Unlike this previous Ask, I want to go beyond just "portrayal" of large friend group dynamics, I'm really seeking psychologically rich descriptions of how friends in groups impact each other and how the dynamics change over time. It also feels much rarer to find books about 3 friends or more rather than intense two-part friendships.
If there are any books you've read that have gotten you to understand your own friendship groups in a different way, I'm looking for those ah-ha moments.
* "Friend group" can be flexible, I'm open to speculative fiction that focuses on a ship's crew, for instance.
* I would prefer friendship groups with all genders but it's not a requirement. Not as interested in all-men friendship groups where there's a strong emphasis on bro-culture/masculinity.
* I am drawing a hard line at books written before the 20th/21st Century - I don't currently have the energy to tackle something archaically loquacious.
I'm interested in exploring fiction or literary non-fiction about "large" friend groups and their dynamics, 3 friends or more. I've read A Little Life by Hanya Yanagihara and that's something I'm looking for. Unlike this previous Ask, I want to go beyond just "portrayal" of large friend group dynamics, I'm really seeking psychologically rich descriptions of how friends in groups impact each other and how the dynamics change over time. It also feels much rarer to find books about 3 friends or more rather than intense two-part friendships.
If there are any books you've read that have gotten you to understand your own friendship groups in a different way, I'm looking for those ah-ha moments.
* "Friend group" can be flexible, I'm open to speculative fiction that focuses on a ship's crew, for instance.
* I would prefer friendship groups with all genders but it's not a requirement. Not as interested in all-men friendship groups where there's a strong emphasis on bro-culture/masculinity.
* I am drawing a hard line at books written before the 20th/21st Century - I don't currently have the energy to tackle something archaically loquacious.
The Interestings by Meg Wolitzer is spot-on for this.
And seconding The Secret History.
posted by nantucket at 9:41 AM on June 30, 2022 [14 favorites]
And seconding The Secret History.
posted by nantucket at 9:41 AM on June 30, 2022 [14 favorites]
Check out Jennifer Egan's A Visit from the Goon Squad and followup The Candy House.
posted by lefty lucky cat at 9:55 AM on June 30, 2022 [6 favorites]
posted by lefty lucky cat at 9:55 AM on June 30, 2022 [6 favorites]
Virginia Woolf's The Waves.
Christina Hesselholdt's Companions.
posted by derrinyet at 9:56 AM on June 30, 2022 [5 favorites]
Christina Hesselholdt's Companions.
posted by derrinyet at 9:56 AM on June 30, 2022 [5 favorites]
My Brilliant Friend follows a large friend group although most of it is about two people.
posted by clew at 10:16 AM on June 30, 2022 [6 favorites]
posted by clew at 10:16 AM on June 30, 2022 [6 favorites]
Seconding the Egan recommendation. I just finished Our Country Friends by Gary Shteyngart, and it might also be of interest to you.
posted by pinkacademic at 10:37 AM on June 30, 2022 [2 favorites]
posted by pinkacademic at 10:37 AM on June 30, 2022 [2 favorites]
Gary Shteyngart's Our Country Friends fits the bill. If you count coworkers as "a group of friends," you could try Joshua Ferris's Then We Came to the End.
posted by scratch at 10:39 AM on June 30, 2022 [2 favorites]
posted by scratch at 10:39 AM on June 30, 2022 [2 favorites]
pinkacademic by a whisker
posted by scratch at 10:40 AM on June 30, 2022 [2 favorites]
posted by scratch at 10:40 AM on June 30, 2022 [2 favorites]
The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie.
posted by aws17576 at 10:40 AM on June 30, 2022 [2 favorites]
posted by aws17576 at 10:40 AM on June 30, 2022 [2 favorites]
OH!!! Mary McCarthy's The Group is PERFECT.
posted by scratch at 10:42 AM on June 30, 2022 [5 favorites]
posted by scratch at 10:42 AM on June 30, 2022 [5 favorites]
A Home at the End of the World by Michael Cunningham is sort of about a menage a trois--or quatre, depending on how you count.
posted by scratch at 10:45 AM on June 30, 2022 [1 favorite]
posted by scratch at 10:45 AM on June 30, 2022 [1 favorite]
Just finished A Suitable Companion for the End of Your Life, which really snuck up on me with the richness of its characterizations. It's exactly about how friendships change people, but it also imagines friendship in an unusually expansive way: it describes a dynamic friendship network more than a neatly defined group, I'd say. It's a weird, moving book about care and caring with female friendship at its core.
posted by puppytree at 10:49 AM on June 30, 2022 [1 favorite]
posted by puppytree at 10:49 AM on June 30, 2022 [1 favorite]
It's been a bit since I've read it, but Amor Towles does this well and I think all three of his (fantastic; I literally cannot get enough of his writing) novels - Rules of Civility, A Gentleman in Moscow and The Lincoln Highway - deal with this type of relationship dynamics and psychological discussion, though over varying timescales (Rules of Civility and A Gentleman in Moscow over a longer period of time and The Lincoln Highway is over ten days).
Rebecca Kauffman's The Gunners is also of this ilk. I also echo above recommendations of The Secret History and The Interestings, though I kind of found both infuriating.
posted by urbanlenny at 10:54 AM on June 30, 2022
Rebecca Kauffman's The Gunners is also of this ilk. I also echo above recommendations of The Secret History and The Interestings, though I kind of found both infuriating.
posted by urbanlenny at 10:54 AM on June 30, 2022
Ludmilla Ulitskaya's The Big Green Tent, though broadly about life as a dissident in Soviet Russia, is also about a group of friends and how they change over time. (It is also very good)
If you're read A Little Life, you may have already gotten there but if not, you might give Rebecca Makkai's The Great Believers a shot (note: I cried while reading this book) .
posted by thivaia at 11:20 AM on June 30, 2022 [1 favorite]
If you're read A Little Life, you may have already gotten there but if not, you might give Rebecca Makkai's The Great Believers a shot (note: I cried while reading this book) .
posted by thivaia at 11:20 AM on June 30, 2022 [1 favorite]
The Robber Bride by Margaret Atwood might fit the bill.
posted by winterportage at 11:57 AM on June 30, 2022 [1 favorite]
posted by winterportage at 11:57 AM on June 30, 2022 [1 favorite]
Hilary Mantel's An Experiment in Love is another.
posted by praemunire at 12:11 PM on June 30, 2022 [1 favorite]
posted by praemunire at 12:11 PM on June 30, 2022 [1 favorite]
Ooh, on Margaret Atwood, also Cat's Eye. The Robber Bride is an excellent suggestion.
posted by urbanlenny at 12:13 PM on June 30, 2022 [2 favorites]
posted by urbanlenny at 12:13 PM on June 30, 2022 [2 favorites]
OH!!! Mary McCarthy's The Group is PERFECT.
Several years ago, two very loose adaptations/updates of that book came out: A Fortunate Age by Joanna Rakoff and Commencement by J. Courtney Sullivan. They were both debut novels and both a little spotty in terms of quality, but really do follow groups of friends over long periods of time. The former I thought was better in terms of tracking the changing group dynamics.
posted by lunasol at 12:30 PM on June 30, 2022 [1 favorite]
Several years ago, two very loose adaptations/updates of that book came out: A Fortunate Age by Joanna Rakoff and Commencement by J. Courtney Sullivan. They were both debut novels and both a little spotty in terms of quality, but really do follow groups of friends over long periods of time. The former I thought was better in terms of tracking the changing group dynamics.
posted by lunasol at 12:30 PM on June 30, 2022 [1 favorite]
Maybe Pamela Dean’s Tam Lin?
posted by azalea_chant at 1:21 PM on June 30, 2022 [2 favorites]
posted by azalea_chant at 1:21 PM on June 30, 2022 [2 favorites]
Tessa Hadley’s Late in the Day is about two couples, but they start as a friend group. Very good on the passage of time and what that does to individuals and relationships.
posted by yarrow at 1:51 PM on June 30, 2022
posted by yarrow at 1:51 PM on June 30, 2022
Maeve Binchy's Circle of Friends kind of says it on the tin?
posted by BobTheScientist at 2:06 PM on June 30, 2022 [3 favorites]
posted by BobTheScientist at 2:06 PM on June 30, 2022 [3 favorites]
Rebecca Makkai's The Great Believers does this wonderfully.
posted by Threeve at 6:06 PM on June 30, 2022
posted by Threeve at 6:06 PM on June 30, 2022
If you don't mind the friends in question being teenaged girls, I think Tana French's The Secret Place does a good job of exploring changing friendships.
Also, The Joy Luck Club is a recent
(as in not too early for your preferred time window, it is still 30+ years old) classic.
A series, but the Inspector Gamache novels by Louise Penny explore a group of friends and neighbors in a small town in Quebec. First in the series is Still Life.
posted by the primroses were over at 6:24 PM on June 30, 2022
Also, The Joy Luck Club is a recent
(as in not too early for your preferred time window, it is still 30+ years old) classic.
A series, but the Inspector Gamache novels by Louise Penny explore a group of friends and neighbors in a small town in Quebec. First in the series is Still Life.
posted by the primroses were over at 6:24 PM on June 30, 2022
Anthony Powell's A Dance to the Music of Time is a 12-volume roman-fleuve following the lives of four white male characters, who meet at a posh English school, over the course of their lives and the 20th century (1920-1970, roughly). Themes are, broadly: class, talent, lust, charisma and fortune. It's very much centred on the white upper middle/lower upper classes in London during that period, so it will depend on your interest in that... shall we say... scene... but I found it fascinating and dive back into it periodically.
This might not be what you're looking for. The novels are in many ways more about the broader social mileau than any of the individual characters. Whether friendship is at the heart of the novel depends on your definition of friendship. I also can't guarantee no era-appropriate sexism from Powell. But I'm suggesting it anyway, mainly because they're very readable, the interpersonal dynamics of the four change drastically over time depending on fortune and circumstances and the book captures the way that people fall in and out of each other's lives in a remarkable way.
posted by happyfrog at 9:32 PM on June 30, 2022 [1 favorite]
This might not be what you're looking for. The novels are in many ways more about the broader social mileau than any of the individual characters. Whether friendship is at the heart of the novel depends on your definition of friendship. I also can't guarantee no era-appropriate sexism from Powell. But I'm suggesting it anyway, mainly because they're very readable, the interpersonal dynamics of the four change drastically over time depending on fortune and circumstances and the book captures the way that people fall in and out of each other's lives in a remarkable way.
posted by happyfrog at 9:32 PM on June 30, 2022 [1 favorite]
Journey by Moonlight by Antal Szerb, one of my favorites that digs deep into this.
posted by perhapses at 8:38 PM on July 1, 2022
posted by perhapses at 8:38 PM on July 1, 2022
Modern Lovers by Emma Straub.
posted by azalea_chant at 12:44 PM on May 23, 2023
posted by azalea_chant at 12:44 PM on May 23, 2023
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posted by praemunire at 9:35 AM on June 30, 2022 [9 favorites]