The honors thesis that I never completed
April 22, 2015 3:07 PM Subscribe
Due to extenuating circumstances, I never finished my honors thesis, and have since graduated and moved on to another institution. I feel bad for disappearing on my PI and for not completing the work. What to do?
A year or two ago, I was working on an honors thesis, when I was sexually assaulted. Though I was pretty sure that I would have been able to complete the thesis at the time, I never actually finished the work because that final semester of college (and the 18 months after, really) was a blur of police reports and counseling.
I feel awful that I basically disappeared into thin air on my PI. I pretty much told him, "sorry, I am dealing with an emergency," and then didn't talk to him again. He was a very nice PI, I was on good terms with him and he thought I was a good student. When I spoke to him, he was understanding. He hasn't since emailed me, other than to congratulate me for winning the departmental prize, saying it was very well-deserved. I graduated with honors anyway, because I had solid coursework and had done other research projects earlier in my undergrad career.
The field of research I was working on for my thesis was something that I was passionate about, but probably not in the same direction that my career will ultimately head in. I am now in the middle of my own graduate studies.
Other information: I was carrying out my research at an institution that wasn't my undergrad institution. There wasn't any grant that fell through because of my failure to complete the work, although the PI had elected to fund me out of his own pocket. I am sure that the research has progressed from where I left off; the entire group has turned over since I've left (postdocs have left, PhD students have graduated, even the department head has changed). I don't know that there is anything for me to do at the present time to address this. But I feel bad about not having finished the work and about disappearing on my PI. Has anybody in a similar situation ever gone back to finish their thesis? Professors of Mefi, have you ever had a student just disappear on you due to an emergency...? How did they deal with it? How do you think they should have dealt with it? Should I write my PI a note (but about what?) or would that be too awkward / pointless? Thanks.
A year or two ago, I was working on an honors thesis, when I was sexually assaulted. Though I was pretty sure that I would have been able to complete the thesis at the time, I never actually finished the work because that final semester of college (and the 18 months after, really) was a blur of police reports and counseling.
I feel awful that I basically disappeared into thin air on my PI. I pretty much told him, "sorry, I am dealing with an emergency," and then didn't talk to him again. He was a very nice PI, I was on good terms with him and he thought I was a good student. When I spoke to him, he was understanding. He hasn't since emailed me, other than to congratulate me for winning the departmental prize, saying it was very well-deserved. I graduated with honors anyway, because I had solid coursework and had done other research projects earlier in my undergrad career.
The field of research I was working on for my thesis was something that I was passionate about, but probably not in the same direction that my career will ultimately head in. I am now in the middle of my own graduate studies.
Other information: I was carrying out my research at an institution that wasn't my undergrad institution. There wasn't any grant that fell through because of my failure to complete the work, although the PI had elected to fund me out of his own pocket. I am sure that the research has progressed from where I left off; the entire group has turned over since I've left (postdocs have left, PhD students have graduated, even the department head has changed). I don't know that there is anything for me to do at the present time to address this. But I feel bad about not having finished the work and about disappearing on my PI. Has anybody in a similar situation ever gone back to finish their thesis? Professors of Mefi, have you ever had a student just disappear on you due to an emergency...? How did they deal with it? How do you think they should have dealt with it? Should I write my PI a note (but about what?) or would that be too awkward / pointless? Thanks.
Were this to happen to me---and something sort of similar did about two years ago---I'd be more concerned about the person than the work. In my case, I just finished the work myself, which was a bit of a pain, but no big deal, really. PIs can't overly depend on undergrads. He should have had some sort of backup plan in place, in case your project went south.
What I really appreciated was a note from my student when she returned home and regained equilibrium. It was nice to hear from her on how much she (seemingly honestly) appreciated her time with us, even through her difficulties. More importantly, I was very pleased to see that she was again happy and being productive. Knowing someone is out of crisis, when the last time you saw them was near their depths is/was a big relief.
Like lunasol, I'd recommend a short note expressing your feelings to your ex-PI. You don't need to give a lot of detail, but letting them know that you're out of danger and found your way to grad school will be, I suspect, a great pleasure to them.
posted by bonehead at 3:37 PM on April 22, 2015 [9 favorites]
What I really appreciated was a note from my student when she returned home and regained equilibrium. It was nice to hear from her on how much she (seemingly honestly) appreciated her time with us, even through her difficulties. More importantly, I was very pleased to see that she was again happy and being productive. Knowing someone is out of crisis, when the last time you saw them was near their depths is/was a big relief.
Like lunasol, I'd recommend a short note expressing your feelings to your ex-PI. You don't need to give a lot of detail, but letting them know that you're out of danger and found your way to grad school will be, I suspect, a great pleasure to them.
posted by bonehead at 3:37 PM on April 22, 2015 [9 favorites]
bonehead's right, if the ex-supervisor was a PI worth working with, they'll be more concerned for your welfare than the work, and would appreciate any note that you may write them.
If you're continuing on in academia, this is a good networking opportunity. I've certainly kept in touch with my ex-supervisors with whom there was mutual respect.
Any unfinished work was probably gladly inherited by another Honours student.
posted by porpoise at 6:27 PM on April 22, 2015
If you're continuing on in academia, this is a good networking opportunity. I've certainly kept in touch with my ex-supervisors with whom there was mutual respect.
Any unfinished work was probably gladly inherited by another Honours student.
posted by porpoise at 6:27 PM on April 22, 2015
Please do not spend another instant worrying about finishing your undergraduate thesis project. It would be kind of you to send a note to your former PI, especially if you emphasize thanking him for the opportunity and understanding, updating him about what you're doing now, and telling him in so many words how the opportunity helped you get where you are now, even though the actual work didn't take place, because he was so interested in your work and/or whatever the truth of the situation is. You can also apologize and explain if you'd like, but it won't be as rewarding for him as knowing that you're successful and part of that is thanks to him (and I don't have to tell you that you don't owe anyone disclosure of anything, do I? you know that and if you share anything it will be because you want to, for your own reasons.) It's pretty rare for an undergrad thesis to be central to a lab's work, and if it is, someone else will finish it.
Good teachers (which includes anyone willing to fund a student out-of-pocket - you must be hot stuff!) love to know that their students are out in the world doing great stuff, and to know that their students valued their teaching.
posted by gingerest at 11:09 PM on April 22, 2015
Good teachers (which includes anyone willing to fund a student out-of-pocket - you must be hot stuff!) love to know that their students are out in the world doing great stuff, and to know that their students valued their teaching.
posted by gingerest at 11:09 PM on April 22, 2015
First, a possibly comforting thing to know is that professors really do not tend to put all their eggs in the basket of an undergrad doing research for them. Undergrads are around for such a brief period and tend to be pretty flaky (NOT saying you were flaky, just that they tend to be!), and so a responsible PI is not going to have their whole project riding on whether an undergrad completes a piece of the research in a timely manner or not. So, do not be worried that you ruined the project or anything -- I'm sure your piece got passed on to another student to complete. (And if not, that's really the professor's fault, not yours!)
That said, I do think it would be a nice thing to follow up and let your professor know that you're doing okay now and appreciate his mentorship. I have definitely had students who were clearly going through some sort of personal crisis during the time I knew them, and it is always nice to hear back from them that things are going better. You don't need to go into any more detail than you wish to in explaining the sexual assault (I think just saying "a personal emergency outside of my control" or something is fine) -- I think he would mostly just be glad to hear that things are going well for you. From a professional standpoint, this person also might be a contact down the road and it's not a terrible thing to remind him that you were dealing with something real/serious at the time and not just flaking out to go on one last spring break trip or whatever.
posted by rainbowbrite at 7:24 AM on April 23, 2015
That said, I do think it would be a nice thing to follow up and let your professor know that you're doing okay now and appreciate his mentorship. I have definitely had students who were clearly going through some sort of personal crisis during the time I knew them, and it is always nice to hear back from them that things are going better. You don't need to go into any more detail than you wish to in explaining the sexual assault (I think just saying "a personal emergency outside of my control" or something is fine) -- I think he would mostly just be glad to hear that things are going well for you. From a professional standpoint, this person also might be a contact down the road and it's not a terrible thing to remind him that you were dealing with something real/serious at the time and not just flaking out to go on one last spring break trip or whatever.
posted by rainbowbrite at 7:24 AM on April 23, 2015
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I think you should do this mostly for your own peace of mind - it will help you feel better. I also think it would be a kindness to the PI who is probably not spending his days cursing you but might still be concerned about what happened on a human level. I have a lot of professor friends and undergrads flaking is not an irregular occurance, but I bet he'd like to know that you appreciated his support and that you weren't purposefully blowing his project off.
posted by lunasol at 3:19 PM on April 22, 2015 [9 favorites]