Wedding (and other) rings: is it better to go for the size that feels too tight, or the size that feels too loose?
(UK ring sizes explained/compared to other systems here
I wear two rings, one on the ring finger of each hand (family heirloom & engagement ring, call them A and B). I hardly ever take them off, and plan to do likewise with my wedding ring. Both rings are also old - c.1950 and c.1920 - respectively, but the wedding ring I'm buying new.
Ring A was resized for me when I got it, about 12 years ago. It's size K. It's always felt a little loose, especially since I lost some weight since getting it; the jeweller offered to shrink it down at the time if I wanted, but I wasn't used to wearing a ring and worried about it being too small if I did. Regretted that since, but it's never seemed in imminent danger of falling off, so I've never got around to resizing it. Ring B wasn't resized since its original owner had it, but the jeweller who looked at it for me measured it as a J or J-and-a-half. It's slightly less round than ring B, more like a squashed circle. It felt too small when I first tried to put it on (after climbing a mountain, with my fingers a bit swollen!) but it went on fine afterwards, to the point where I've now started worrying that it, too, is slightly too big.
Both rings are gold bands with settings in them, and both are loose enough that the setting often moves round when I'm wearing them (A more so than B). When it's hot outside or I've just been exercising, they feel pretty secure, but at other times they feel looser; I can slide them up and down my finger without really having to tug at all to get them over the knuckle, and (I discover to my horror) actually shake them off just by shaking my hand about vigorously enough.
My plan was to get a wedding ring that fit perfectly, and then get the other two resized to whatever size that was. We spoke to a few jewellers but ended up buying rings from an online service. Their trial sizes seemed to be on the snugger side, so I ordered my ring (plain gold band) in a J. It arrived yesterday - and it's small! I can get it on all right with a bit of force, and it does come off, but I have to really work at it to get it past the knuckle. I wouldn't have to worry about it falling off - but on the other hand, if my finger was even slightly swollen, I worry it wouldn't come off at all.
The wedding ring company will re-size it for the price of postage - but they won't resize by half-sizes, and a whole ring size up would make it a K, which is somewhere between my other two rings. On the other hand, even a half-size up would make it the same ring size as ring B, which feels too big. I know different jewellers have slightly different sizes, but surely not that
Is it worth taking all three rings to a jeweller that will resize in half-sizes, and seeing if there exists a ring size in between the wedding ring and the other two? And if that doesn't end up working out, which size do I go for? The wedding is in late November and we're going on honeymoon straight afterwards; I don't want any of the rings to cut off my circulation, but I'd really
hate to lose one of them in the Australian desert, so my inclination is to go for the smaller size unless it's generally a bad idea to have a ring you can't easily take off.