How did you break social habits that were hurting others and you?
October 15, 2012 1:25 PM Subscribe
You had the habit of being sarcastic, mean, harshly opinionated (and/or some other problematic interaction) as a form of intimacy or bonding. You were able to break the habit. How, specifically, did you manage to make this change in your interaction style?
posted by windykites to human relations (47 answers total) 72 users marked this as a favorite
By this question I mean:
-What steps or tricks did you use to break the habit?
-What kind of things did you do or say instead?
-How did you learn to stop associating meanness (or whatever) with closeness/ impressiveness?
-How did you reposition yourself socially, change peoples' expectations?
-What kind of bonding replaced the "mean-bond"- that is, how did you learn to feel close to people without being mean to them?
-How did you get over feeling that politeness/gentleness is a very phony, shallow kind of interaction, best used for strangers or to keep people at a distance?
Bonus: Was it worth it? What changes did you notice as a result?