Online Personals

June 6, 2005 3:01 PM

I'm looking to meet people in the Orlando area. Anyone have good advice on online personals or meeting people in general?

In a previous Ask Mefi on dating, someone mentioned fine tuning personal ads to garner more responses. What makes a good personal ad? Should it be serious or more haha? I am leaning towards half-serious, thoughtful, yet funny. No pictures from a bathroom mirror or professional photos. Also, what are good online personals? I checked out Lavalife and the Nerve/Onion/etc personals, but they seem to have few women from the Orlando area.

This question relates to a bigger problem I would like to address: meeting new people. I like going to arcades, watching movies, riding my bicycle and listening to indie music. I like doing things by myself. I goto lots of concerts, but don't fit in or relate to the scenesters and fad punks that are also there. I have lived in Orlando for 5 years (undergrad and finishing off grad school) and haven't met many lasting friends besides the ones I came here with and haven't gone on any dates.

I'm perfectly happy with this. A few years ago I realized that the college life and the Orlando area haven't been conducive to the life I want to live. I know it sounds stupid - going to grad school despite a strong dislike for academia - but you gotta do what you gotta do. Anyways, when I finish in a year, I can put all this behind me and finally get on with life. Never-the-less, I want to try and have at least one worthwhile dates before I leave here.

Orlando is great place if you like cheap drinks specials and loud clubs, neither of which appeal to me. Up until three weeks ago, I never stepped foot in an club or bar (with the exception of many concerts). I'm not much for group gatherings or small talk. The last three weekends I decided to make a go at it and check out a few clubs. I mingled, I danced, I got numbers. Not to sound arrogant, but none of the women I met with seemed vapid and uninteresting. Their idea of going out and having fun was drinking and going out to clubs, which make sense since we were drinking at a club. In a couple weeks I am going to a Mary Timony concert and will try to mingle more in a different setting.

I've read through many of the previous threads on dating/meeting people/etc. They gave good advice, but nothing that I felt could be applied to me. Although I'm decidedly geeky, I don't use live journal or blogger and haven't come across any meetups in the Orlando or St. Pete/Tampa areas. Anymore suggestions on how to meet people?

posted by anonymous to human relations (4 comments total)

I have several close friends that have had really good luck with Match.com (one is now planning a fall wedding). To be sure, there are always plenty of freaky/scary people on online dating sites -- but such people are also aplenty in bars, clubs, bookstores, coffee shops, or anywhere you might otherwise think of to meet "normal" people. While some people still attach a stigma to online dating, the association between "online personals" and "desperation" has definitely diminished.

My advice for using the sites -- be straightforward ... you don't want to have to explain lies, exaggerations, or misleading pics in the event that you actually meet and get to know someone. Don't try to be too funny if you are not a funny guy. Don't be sappy, either -- that CAN seem desperate. I think confidence mixed with slightly self-deprecating humor is often attractive; it allows you to emphasize your positives without going over the top. Good luck!
posted by roundrock at 4:34 PM on June 6, 2005

I've lived in Orlando for almost two years now, haven't met anyone. I work from a home office, so it's not like I even have the workplace to make connections in. My fiancee arrived almost a year ago, and has made a few casual workplace friends but nobody we have ever seen outside of the working environment.

I dunno what to tell you about finding a date (I met my fiancee because of a local Seattle radio host, so that won't really work so much for you), but if you want to say hi you are welcome to email me.
posted by Lokheed at 4:52 PM on June 6, 2005

I grew up in/near Orlando & pretty much hated it, though when I was there in April to visit my parents, it seemed much nicer than it had been. I went to an opening at the Downtown Media Arts Center, and it seemed like a really cool place that relied on a large pool of interesting-looking volunteers, as well as an interesting place to hang out.

The opening was for a photography program for inner-city kids, and my sense was that there's a huge need for volunteers for these sorts of programs. And volunteering is generally a great way to meet people - try volunteermatch.org
posted by judith at 5:36 PM on June 6, 2005

I really don't think that personals are a good way to meet people and find new groups of friends. I really think it's best to get involved in a league sport of some sort, but keep it to a social league rather than a competitive one. Indoor soccer, dodgeball, and kickball have been GREAT for my social life.
posted by SpecialK at 7:18 PM on June 6, 2005