How do you reward yourself after a long week's slog?
October 1, 2010 6:32 PM Subscribe
Self-fanfare for the common man: How do you reward yourself after a long week's slog?
I'm two months deep in a new town and a new job that takes as much as I'm willing to give (which admittedly is often too much), and I find that I'm spending my Fridays unearthing myself from stress and fatigue. Problem is, I think the ways I've typically gone about decompressing -- exercise, TV on DVD, reading, internet time-wasting, impromptu bike trips -- are becoming a bit threadbare. Before I know it, the 60 Minutes clock is ticking, and I'm winding up to do it all over again. I'm content with my situation overall, but I need to breathe some new life into my routine to keep from burning out.
So, I turn to the hive mind in search of new ideas. My question is: how do you treat yourself following a hard week? What sort of indulgence do you grant yourself saying, "yeah, I earned it?" What gets you realigned to do it all over again? Sudoku is as fine an answer as hang gliding -- as long as it works for you. I admit that as a man I may get less mileage out of bubble baths, but I'm open to any and all suggestions.
As an example, I think "cook yourself a really good steak," as suggested by a friend with this WSJ article and this AskMeFi post at the ready, is an idea whose time has come.
Bonus points awarded for birthday schemes, as mine rapidly approaches.
I'm two months deep in a new town and a new job that takes as much as I'm willing to give (which admittedly is often too much), and I find that I'm spending my Fridays unearthing myself from stress and fatigue. Problem is, I think the ways I've typically gone about decompressing -- exercise, TV on DVD, reading, internet time-wasting, impromptu bike trips -- are becoming a bit threadbare. Before I know it, the 60 Minutes clock is ticking, and I'm winding up to do it all over again. I'm content with my situation overall, but I need to breathe some new life into my routine to keep from burning out.
So, I turn to the hive mind in search of new ideas. My question is: how do you treat yourself following a hard week? What sort of indulgence do you grant yourself saying, "yeah, I earned it?" What gets you realigned to do it all over again? Sudoku is as fine an answer as hang gliding -- as long as it works for you. I admit that as a man I may get less mileage out of bubble baths, but I'm open to any and all suggestions.
As an example, I think "cook yourself a really good steak," as suggested by a friend with this WSJ article and this AskMeFi post at the ready, is an idea whose time has come.
Bonus points awarded for birthday schemes, as mine rapidly approaches.
Scotch. Nothing like putting on some nice music, sitting in a comfortable chair and enjoying a nice glass of scotch while reflecting on life (smoking jacket optional).
posted by handbanana at 6:49 PM on October 1, 2010 [2 favorites]
posted by handbanana at 6:49 PM on October 1, 2010 [2 favorites]
Make, make, make something. Brew beer, build new furniture, write, make something. Make something while drinking that scotch.
posted by johnnybeggs at 6:57 PM on October 1, 2010 [2 favorites]
posted by johnnybeggs at 6:57 PM on October 1, 2010 [2 favorites]
Nah, don't sit in the comfy chair, put on some rocking music and dance! So what if you got no one to dance with, just get up and do it. it feels good. If you're into it, smoke a joint. Try out goofy moves you never thought you could do. Work up a good sweat.
posted by mareli at 6:59 PM on October 1, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by mareli at 6:59 PM on October 1, 2010 [1 favorite]
Scotch.
Actually, tonight and most Friday nights, it is single malt whisky: I maintain a healthy and varied collection, and my reward at the end of a long and grueling week is a simple yet somewhat indulgent home cooked meal (rib eye, wild salmon, lamb, risotto) followed by the relaxed and unhurried exploration of a particularly complex malt that begs an hour or two of quiet contemplation: Highland Park 18, aged Speysiders, and any Springbank suit such an occasion. Cognac, aged rums and sipping tequilas will also do in a pinch. Cue low lights and Miles Davis' Kind of Blue to complete this scenario.
posted by braemar at 7:03 PM on October 1, 2010 [2 favorites]
Actually, tonight and most Friday nights, it is single malt whisky: I maintain a healthy and varied collection, and my reward at the end of a long and grueling week is a simple yet somewhat indulgent home cooked meal (rib eye, wild salmon, lamb, risotto) followed by the relaxed and unhurried exploration of a particularly complex malt that begs an hour or two of quiet contemplation: Highland Park 18, aged Speysiders, and any Springbank suit such an occasion. Cognac, aged rums and sipping tequilas will also do in a pinch. Cue low lights and Miles Davis' Kind of Blue to complete this scenario.
posted by braemar at 7:03 PM on October 1, 2010 [2 favorites]
i'm liking all of the above. i have an amazing friday night yoga class, i like to slip into a good sleep with some decent wine, and then saturday morning i choose not to schedule anything in favor of waking up slowly and relishing every moment of the mid-morning. then, my daughter and i go to visit friends or go to the food co-op for an early dinner and people-watch. then, we sometimes wander through downtown and get to bed early. those are the best weekends and the best rewards for busting my ass all week. anything that takes its own sweet time is totally perfect. having someone to ramble with is even better. i live in a smallish but lively new england town and running into people for chats is delicious. if you're on the east coast of the USA, memail me for a hangliding recommendation. never tried it, but there is a mountain near my house where the hangliders like to...hang.
the steak idea is also stellar. last friday, i treated myself to a boneless grass-fed ribeye, cooked as per askmetafilter instructions from that recent "how to cook a steak" post, and some rough-mashed potatoes from a local farmstand dressed with local raw clotted cream and good salted butter. the rest of the week i eat like a hippie (gluten-free, veg heavy, seaweed, all of that stuff), so the steak was a great me-time type of reward. and i'm going to do it again this sunday night.
posted by lakersfan1222 at 7:06 PM on October 1, 2010 [1 favorite]
the steak idea is also stellar. last friday, i treated myself to a boneless grass-fed ribeye, cooked as per askmetafilter instructions from that recent "how to cook a steak" post, and some rough-mashed potatoes from a local farmstand dressed with local raw clotted cream and good salted butter. the rest of the week i eat like a hippie (gluten-free, veg heavy, seaweed, all of that stuff), so the steak was a great me-time type of reward. and i'm going to do it again this sunday night.
posted by lakersfan1222 at 7:06 PM on October 1, 2010 [1 favorite]
yeah, and i make shit when i'm inspired. i can't imagine that you would be into hand-sewing, but something creative, even collage, might get your rocks off and get your mind straight after a long week
posted by lakersfan1222 at 7:07 PM on October 1, 2010
posted by lakersfan1222 at 7:07 PM on October 1, 2010
I get a one hour massage.
I read in bed for half the day.
I sometimes go to the movies by myself.
I know of people that smoke a doobie and watch an old, treasured film like The Big Lebowski or Emperor's New Groove.
posted by smoke at 7:21 PM on October 1, 2010 [1 favorite]
I read in bed for half the day.
I sometimes go to the movies by myself.
I know of people that smoke a doobie and watch an old, treasured film like The Big Lebowski or Emperor's New Groove.
posted by smoke at 7:21 PM on October 1, 2010 [1 favorite]
I admit that as a man I may get less mileage out of bubble baths, but I'm open to any and all suggestions.
Have you actually tried a bubble bath? There's a reason why we like 'em.
If bubbles are absolutely out of the question, you can get bath salts that aren't girly. Grab a paperback you won't weep over if it gets wet, and spend an hour or so in a really hot bath! For extra points, imbibe according to smoke's or braemar's suggestions beforehand...
posted by vorfeed at 7:30 PM on October 1, 2010 [1 favorite]
Have you actually tried a bubble bath? There's a reason why we like 'em.
If bubbles are absolutely out of the question, you can get bath salts that aren't girly. Grab a paperback you won't weep over if it gets wet, and spend an hour or so in a really hot bath! For extra points, imbibe according to smoke's or braemar's suggestions beforehand...
posted by vorfeed at 7:30 PM on October 1, 2010 [1 favorite]
My natural inclination on the weekends is to just chill out, sleep in, watch dvds, read and noodle around on the internet. I usually make it out to the grocery store, and if I'm feeling particularly productive, I'll make myself a nice meal. But, perhaps because of the relative sameness of those weekends, they seem to pass by really quickly. As you noted, next thing you know it's time for the Sunday night blues.
I've found on the weekends where I've stirred myself to go out and do something, treat my city as if I were a tourist and go to the farmers' market, visit a museum or some other "site" (and I confess that being in DC, I'm fortunate to have a ready, and nearly endless supply at hand), then treat myself to a nice meal or snack a coffee shop, and maybe catch a movie, well time seems to pass more slowly. But more slowly in a good way if that makes any sense. When I'm just lounging around all day, it's like all of a sudden it's dark out and I have no idea where the day went. I usually try to have my "fun" day on Saturday and then I still have Sundays to cook, do laundry and all the other boring household stuff that I need to do. Yeah, it sometimes can still be a drag when Sunday night rolls around, but on those weekends, I actually feel like I had a weekend, rather than wondering where it went. I find that I also feel more recharged and energized after those weekends, even though I was a lot more active, then after those where I've just lounged around all weekends .
So my suggestion, and I think that it would work even if you weren't in a major city is to just go out and do something that is outside your everyday routine. Maybe pick a different nearby town or city to explore and go a bit further afield when time and money allow. I sometimes go to NYC on a holiday weekend (and come back Sunday night so I still have the Monday to do the stuff that I'd normally do on Sunday).
posted by kaybdc at 8:22 PM on October 1, 2010 [4 favorites]
I've found on the weekends where I've stirred myself to go out and do something, treat my city as if I were a tourist and go to the farmers' market, visit a museum or some other "site" (and I confess that being in DC, I'm fortunate to have a ready, and nearly endless supply at hand), then treat myself to a nice meal or snack a coffee shop, and maybe catch a movie, well time seems to pass more slowly. But more slowly in a good way if that makes any sense. When I'm just lounging around all day, it's like all of a sudden it's dark out and I have no idea where the day went. I usually try to have my "fun" day on Saturday and then I still have Sundays to cook, do laundry and all the other boring household stuff that I need to do. Yeah, it sometimes can still be a drag when Sunday night rolls around, but on those weekends, I actually feel like I had a weekend, rather than wondering where it went. I find that I also feel more recharged and energized after those weekends, even though I was a lot more active, then after those where I've just lounged around all weekends .
So my suggestion, and I think that it would work even if you weren't in a major city is to just go out and do something that is outside your everyday routine. Maybe pick a different nearby town or city to explore and go a bit further afield when time and money allow. I sometimes go to NYC on a holiday weekend (and come back Sunday night so I still have the Monday to do the stuff that I'd normally do on Sunday).
posted by kaybdc at 8:22 PM on October 1, 2010 [4 favorites]
Be lazy for 90% of your weekend and then do one thing (it doesn't have to be big, just anything, like food or a walk or something) that you've never done before. Your new brand new memory will make you remember your weekend so you won't feel like you've lost it, but you also won't feel like you have to be running at 90mph all the time to get something out of your downtime.
posted by mckenney at 8:30 PM on October 1, 2010 [6 favorites]
posted by mckenney at 8:30 PM on October 1, 2010 [6 favorites]
on edit Mckenney said what I was trying to say more succinctly.
posted by kaybdc at 8:42 PM on October 1, 2010
posted by kaybdc at 8:42 PM on October 1, 2010
Well, I actually do this on weeknights to staunch the stress as it comes, but I love to go to a coffeeshop an hour or so before closing, sit by myself and read. Multiple extra points if the place has a nice autumn breeze coming through. I like how it takes me out of the two environments (work and home) that I spend the most time in and transports me to a temporary, completely responsibility-free zone.
posted by threeants at 8:46 PM on October 1, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by threeants at 8:46 PM on October 1, 2010 [1 favorite]
I bake bread. I love the kneading, because the feeling of throwing my body into the dough is relaxing and invigorating at the same time. I stare out the window and lose myself in the repetitive motion. I love feeling the dough come alive in my hands, it transforms itself in a matter of minutes from a sticky mess to a smooth, pliable ball of soon-to-be deliciousness. When that loaf comes out of the oven, smelling and looking all amazing, I cut off a piece immediately and slather on some butter - since the bread is hot, the butter just melts in right away and oh my god is it good. If it's been a particularly long week, I just eat half the loaf right there. Man, I love bread.
posted by DrGirlfriend at 9:05 PM on October 1, 2010 [6 favorites]
posted by DrGirlfriend at 9:05 PM on October 1, 2010 [6 favorites]
I've found homemade pizza to be rewarding in many ways.
posted by hungrysquirrels at 12:28 AM on October 2, 2010
posted by hungrysquirrels at 12:28 AM on October 2, 2010
I smoke a cigar, outside, while playing a stringed instrument. Alcohol optional.
posted by No-sword at 2:25 AM on October 2, 2010 [2 favorites]
posted by No-sword at 2:25 AM on October 2, 2010 [2 favorites]
Maybe this is insufficiently concrete, but l have a four point plan.
1. Eat something interesting,
2. Drink something interesting,
3. See something interesting,
4. Do something interesting.
On Friday night, l like to have a single beer, in a bar so that I'm not taking stress home, toast the weekend, and plan/dream those four things.
posted by Wrinkled Stumpskin at 2:29 AM on October 2, 2010 [8 favorites]
1. Eat something interesting,
2. Drink something interesting,
3. See something interesting,
4. Do something interesting.
On Friday night, l like to have a single beer, in a bar so that I'm not taking stress home, toast the weekend, and plan/dream those four things.
posted by Wrinkled Stumpskin at 2:29 AM on October 2, 2010 [8 favorites]
a good massage is an excellent, indulgent way to cap off a week of stress. if i get one every week, it becomes routine, so i tend to save them for the end of a particularly rough stretch of work. the massage place i used to go to when i lived in northern california had both great masseuses and wooden hot tubs you got to chill in for half an hour after the massage which i found to be sort of like the male equivalent of having a bubblebath.
posted by messiahwannabe at 3:43 AM on October 2, 2010
posted by messiahwannabe at 3:43 AM on October 2, 2010
Depending on what your job is, you can unwind with your coworkers.
My bosses and I have developed a habit of sharing a drink or two in the office after a hard week's work.
Think like the old "b'wana"s out on Safari, like Hemingway. They'd be out in the savanna for days hunting with little more than a jeep, gun, some food, and their guide. When they returned to camp triumphantly with their game in tow, they'd promptly sit down with their trusted camp members and have a drink made. Gin and campari, or whatever.
Don't just reward yourself to try to "unearth" yourself. You're not trying to cheer yourself up to even out the crappy week. Realize that when you reward yourself you actually deserve it. You're capping off a week's labor with a nice treat.
Second thought: vary your activities more. Try to get outside as much as you can before winter sets in! I just bought a kayak and LOVE it. (lots of good sails...er...sales....going on right now) Thanks for the inspiration to get out on the water today!
posted by carlh at 4:53 AM on October 2, 2010 [1 favorite]
My bosses and I have developed a habit of sharing a drink or two in the office after a hard week's work.
Think like the old "b'wana"s out on Safari, like Hemingway. They'd be out in the savanna for days hunting with little more than a jeep, gun, some food, and their guide. When they returned to camp triumphantly with their game in tow, they'd promptly sit down with their trusted camp members and have a drink made. Gin and campari, or whatever.
Don't just reward yourself to try to "unearth" yourself. You're not trying to cheer yourself up to even out the crappy week. Realize that when you reward yourself you actually deserve it. You're capping off a week's labor with a nice treat.
Second thought: vary your activities more. Try to get outside as much as you can before winter sets in! I just bought a kayak and LOVE it. (lots of good sails...er...sales....going on right now) Thanks for the inspiration to get out on the water today!
posted by carlh at 4:53 AM on October 2, 2010 [1 favorite]
My job would consume me if I let it. Here are some of the ways I set space aside for me:
Every day, I leave my work at work and walk home to a not-work environment. Some days I stay later at work than I'd like, but it keeps a separation between work and home that I need to maintain.
Specific days of the week have activities or rituals associated with them that energize me. Tuesdays are my music nights. Wednesdays are my hang with my teenage kid nights. Fridays are movie nights. Sundays are a special breakfast, sometimes at home and sometimes at a local diner or coffee shop.
Strange as it may sound, I find home maintenance (anything from taking out the garbage to major renovations) and homemaking chores (baking, laundry, even grocery shopping) rewarding and relaxing because I am choosing to do this thing that directly improves my life and my family's lives.
For my birthday, I go to CanadaHelps and donate to the charities whose work I particularly want to support. And I bake myself a cardamom cake.
posted by thatdawnperson at 6:48 AM on October 2, 2010 [2 favorites]
Every day, I leave my work at work and walk home to a not-work environment. Some days I stay later at work than I'd like, but it keeps a separation between work and home that I need to maintain.
Specific days of the week have activities or rituals associated with them that energize me. Tuesdays are my music nights. Wednesdays are my hang with my teenage kid nights. Fridays are movie nights. Sundays are a special breakfast, sometimes at home and sometimes at a local diner or coffee shop.
Strange as it may sound, I find home maintenance (anything from taking out the garbage to major renovations) and homemaking chores (baking, laundry, even grocery shopping) rewarding and relaxing because I am choosing to do this thing that directly improves my life and my family's lives.
For my birthday, I go to CanadaHelps and donate to the charities whose work I particularly want to support. And I bake myself a cardamom cake.
posted by thatdawnperson at 6:48 AM on October 2, 2010 [2 favorites]
We do something outdoorsy or "about town" on our weekends--go to the big park and fly a kite, roller blade, go for a walk, go to the Botanic Gardens or local art gallery's grounds, local film screenings, tooling around gallery and museums, etc. We're free late Friday afternoon so when it's nice out we run to a place with a patio and decent drinks/appetizers and unwind that way, especially right now at summer's last gasp and the start of fall--great patio weather. Stay in bed a while Saturday morning, awake but cuddling and talking/decompressing, and ethnic hole in the wall for lunchtime bites. Sunday morning is yes indeed for brunch, whether out or at home. (The way it works usually is we go out to eat once a week and rotate when in the weekend it is--Sunday brunch means no Saturday lunch out, and Saturday meal out means Sunday brunch is a long lazy home-cooked breakfast with jazzy music, etc.)
Allow yourself time to read, or zone out, or burn through your DVD collection, or just be unproductive for a while--this tends to be midday Sunday for us.
By the way, I try to make anything work-related I need to have in place Monday already ready to go BEFORE Friday's moment of freedom happens (examples: I do the week's laundry/bedsheet-changing and garbage stuff, general weekly housekeeping Thursday night after work, as crazy as that sounds, and I write up my meal plans and grocery list before Friday too, gradually during the week when I have odd bits of free time). I know this isn't always possible for people but it does me a world of good to know when the weekend starts it really is the weekend. It makes the days before it a little bit more harried but with planning and routine in place it works out nicely, and if anything makes the weekend even more of a relief. When it's time, it's TIME. I could hypothetically hibernate from Friday night to Sunday night with no recourse for Monday's efficiency, the only thing that needs to be dealt with is packing a lunch Sunday night. (We do go grocery shopping on weekends, but we try to make a game of it.)
posted by ifjuly at 7:14 AM on October 2, 2010 [3 favorites]
Allow yourself time to read, or zone out, or burn through your DVD collection, or just be unproductive for a while--this tends to be midday Sunday for us.
By the way, I try to make anything work-related I need to have in place Monday already ready to go BEFORE Friday's moment of freedom happens (examples: I do the week's laundry/bedsheet-changing and garbage stuff, general weekly housekeeping Thursday night after work, as crazy as that sounds, and I write up my meal plans and grocery list before Friday too, gradually during the week when I have odd bits of free time). I know this isn't always possible for people but it does me a world of good to know when the weekend starts it really is the weekend. It makes the days before it a little bit more harried but with planning and routine in place it works out nicely, and if anything makes the weekend even more of a relief. When it's time, it's TIME. I could hypothetically hibernate from Friday night to Sunday night with no recourse for Monday's efficiency, the only thing that needs to be dealt with is packing a lunch Sunday night. (We do go grocery shopping on weekends, but we try to make a game of it.)
posted by ifjuly at 7:14 AM on October 2, 2010 [3 favorites]
Sauna -with breaks for beverages, fruit and meat snacks.
posted by bonobothegreat at 12:10 PM on October 2, 2010
posted by bonobothegreat at 12:10 PM on October 2, 2010
This thread is closed to new comments.
And along those same lines, a Friday 6pm massage is amazing...
posted by hapax_legomenon at 6:41 PM on October 1, 2010 [4 favorites]