New job anxiety.
April 3, 2010 7:42 AM Subscribe
Just started a new job and I've become HORRIFIED by life. How do I stop panicking?
I just started at my new job last week, and I feel like I've gotten in way over my head. It's my first job out of college since May, in the industry that I always [thought] I wanted to work in, but now I'm feeling pangs of panic every day about it:
- There is more responsibility involved than I've ever been used to in my life. I feel like if I fail, my "career" will be ruined. I don't know how to perform any of my tasks yet. I'm still being trained, but eventually my actions will either be successful or else I really screw the company over big time. I am being trained starting from scratch and am afraid I will never learn how to do this job.
- I'm extremely intimidated by the people I work with. They are a lot more experienced and older than me and I don't feel like I connect with them. As a result, I am very quiet at work. I am used to jobs where I can chat and joke with my coworkers.
- I'm extremely depressed that I might have chosen the wrong industry to pursue a career in. Everyone is so stressed all the time - which I knew was inevitable but not to this extent, and I can't help but think "that's going to be me soon."
- Very long hours - I feel like if I wake up at 6am and get home at 7pm, I only have 3 or 4 free hours a day before I can get a good 7 or 8 hours of sleep and not be extremely tired the next day. I feel like my life is gone, which I know is over-dramatic but it's still a rough transition to go from doing nothing all day to this and I'm looking for ways to get used to it.
I know that this is just part of growing up, becoming an adult, "welcome to the real world" etc...and I also know that no one is "married" to their job and that I can always quit or look for a new job if it gets so rough that I can't take it anymore. But for some reason I'm not grasping these concepts and instead feeling like everything is going to lead to failure - either career failure or life-balance/happiness failure. I panic at random moments throughout the day and extremely powerful feelings of anxiety wave in and out of me. I can't sleep and I've also been a lot quieter when around my friends and family. When someone congratulates me on the job and says something like "that's awesome, that's the job you always wanted right?" I pretty much want to cry (but manage to squeak out a "yup").
I feel like I'm being over-dramatic, over-exaggerating and like I need to suck it up. Even having a job in this economy is lucky, let alone in your "dream industry". I feel like an old person already looking back on their youth - "I should have traveled more" or "I should have done more crazy things when I had less responsibility". I feel as guilty for having ridiculous thoughts as I am depressed about these prospects becoming reality.
How do I get myself out of these feelings? How do I convince myself that things will get better with time and that I'll get used to this? I want to look back on this post in a few months and laugh at how silly and dramatic I was acting, but I don't know how to reach that point.
Any tips, anecdotes, or different perspectives to chew on would be really helpful. Thank you.
posted by anonymous to work & money (37 answers total) 29 users marked this as a favorite
I'm educated and experienced in my field, and I never feel like I know what the hell is going on with a new job until at least a few months in. Nobody there is expecting you to be an expert right out of the gate. They know this is your first job and they know it will take some time until you learn the ropes. Don't be afraid to befriend a couple of people at work and ask them questions about the company and the industry; I know I would definitely be flattered and eager to help if a young new employee asked me for advice. Everybody may seem stressed in the office, but they've all got to eat - ask a coworker or your boss if they'd like to go to lunch with you.
Give yourself a break here. It will take some time to feel comfortable. College to a full time job is a huge transition, even if you're 100% sure about where you want to be. It may turn out that this job and industry are not for you, and that is absolutely okay. Just don't give up quite yet.
posted by something something at 7:52 AM on April 3, 2010 [1 favorite]