Turning 30. Handling it poorly.
April 30, 2010 6:36 AM Subscribe
I'm not talented at anything useful. I'm not passionate about anything specific. And I'm getting older. What now?
posted by anonymous to Work & Money (32 answers total) 161 users marked this as a favorite
I'll be 30 this year. Although I have an apartment, I'm unemployed and I have debt. Apart from the arts, I have no practical skills. Although I have loved ones, I don't have many. I'm financially unstable, professionally useless, and socially awkward.
However, I am imaginative. This and fortunate timing are probably the only reasons I'm not homeless right now. To create and then move on is a lifestyle for many, but I'm either lacking the life or the style.
Friends and family advise me to do what I love to do, but I see people who are focused on their passions (teaching, writing, carpentry, making money, etc) and I don't share that quality. The only thing I love is existence itself. Trying to narrow it down, I just shrug. I'm not talented enough at a single thing to earn a living from it. It takes years to become truly skilled at anything, and I've already lost so much time. And when trying to decide what skill I should focus on improving, I don't know how to choose because I don't care about anything more than I care about anything else.
I may not like any of these things the way Picasso loved painting, but I like them enough to list them: writing, photography, cinema, sketching, music, humor, concepts, and crafts.
Every day that passes, I see more sand tumbling down. The taller the sand mound, the more I panic. I'm a failure at being an adult. When I was a little girl, I wouldn't have guessed I'd still be confused about these issues at 29.
Have you gone through this and found an answer that worked for you? Or do you know anyone who went through something similar but figured things out in the end? I'd love to hear how you sorted things out.
(I know metafilter frequently suggests therapy, so this is a note to mention that I have already tried it and this is where I am now. I can't afford more therapy.)
I also set up an email account at firstname.lastname@example.org for anyone who would like to respond privately. Thanks ahead of time for your responses. :)