I think I might be about to flunk out of college for the second time.

May 30, 2009 6:59 PM

I think I might be about to flunk out of college for the second time.

Last Fall I failed out of college pretty spectacularly, passing only one class (with a D). Basically I was having some mental health issues (a pretty serious depressive episode) and managed to do basically none of the work required of me (I'm an English major, so it was mostly just not handing in papers).

They kicked me out for a year, I went home to live with my parents, temped part-time and took some classes part-time to make up the credits, tried to work out my psychological stuff and then came back to my school this Spring.

I've never been good at "doing school," and although I started the semester off okay, for the last two months or so I've been totally slacking off--skipping class, procrastinating, basically falling back into old bad habits. The catch is that I've completed and handed in all of the papers I've had to write, which is a complete 180 from last Fall so I didn't even really realize how much I was fucking around.

Except I screwed up pretty badly in my (intro-level) science-type electives (the reason I took these classes was to complete some general requirements and also because they were the only open classes that fit into my schedule, plus I didn't want to deal with having to write as many papers.)

These classes don't have papers, they have problem sets, and the professors don't accept them late, so when I didn't do the problem sets it was easy to shrug off as a lost cause because they aren't worth a huge percentage of the class grade anyway, so it just didn't feel like a big deal.

Since I was handing in all of the papers I had to write, I guess I deluded myself into thinking that school was going okay. Except one of my science classes just posted my grade: C minus, which is about a full letter grade lower than I was expecting (basically I was getting Bs on the exams so I thought I was in the clear, and just didn't really think about the 10 points I was going to lose from not handing in the problem sets), and it's made me realize how badly I could potentially do in the other science class.

I need a C minus or better in the other class to be allowed to stay at school. I did some number-crunching, and unless I did pretty well on the final, it looks like I might not hit the mark.

My grade is going to be posted sometime between now and Monday, and basically I am COMPLETELY freaking out at this point. I need advice in two ways:

- What can I do to relax between now and when my grade gets posted? I already have depression and anxiety issues and this is the most stressed I've ever been about anything, ever--plus I just spent the last two weeks in the throws of finals and writing a huge research paper, so I'm dealing with residual stress from that as well. I have a pounding headache, I feel nauseated and I've been crying for at least three hours.

- How do I plan for the worst? I'm freaking 23 years old but feel like I'm 16. I don't feel capable of living on my own or getting a job in this economy with just a high school diploma and no serious work experience. I really don't get along with my parents and the year I spent living at home was horrible, but I'm worried that I'll end up moving back in with them just because it's easy and end up staying out of inertia, not paying rent or for food and just basically continuing to live like a high schooler. I have about six grand in savings--do I suck it up and stay with my parents until I find a job, or do I find an apartment first? Should I even be making these plans at all, or do I wait until I know for sure what's going on (after all, there's still a chance I could just barely make the grade. I studied like hell for the final but never feel completely confident with science/math-type stuff so I genuinely have no idea how I did, plus I also don't know how well I need to do since I haven't been bothering to pick up the quizzes and don't know the grade I got on a written assignment toward the end of the semester that was a decent chunk of our grade).

Complicating matters: I don't drive, and I'm from Manhattan and would really love to stay in New York City (all of my friends are there; driving isn't necessary; and in addition to being comfortable there I absolutely love the city), but I know rent is exorbitant, even in the outer boroughs, and job competition is fierce.

I just feel totally overwhelmed. Help.

posted by anonymous to education (30 comments total)

You might want to try talking to your professors. If you got B's on the tests but didn't turn in the problem sets, they might be willing to cut you some slack if you explain your situation. For most students, getting a C- isn't a big deal, and these professors are certainly not expecting the grades they give you to cause you to flunk out.
posted by delmoi at 7:01 PM on May 30

Oh and another thing: The "Good students", the ones who get As all the time, they pester their professors all the time, haggle over every little thing. As someone who wasn't a good student, I found it a little unseemly, but it's what happens.
posted by delmoi at 7:04 PM on May 30

I would also talk to the professor to see if they might cut you some slack. Have you talked to your school about getting accommodations for your mental health conditions? They might allow you more time for certain assignments if you're having a hard time, which could help you ensure that they get turned in. Of course, this is not really to avoid doing them in the first place, just to give you a better chance of finishing them if you're struggling.
posted by ishotjr at 7:13 PM on May 30

Also talk to your school's equivalent of the counselling department. They are mandated by law, as far as I know, to provide reasonable accommodation for students with disabilities.
posted by dirtynumbangelboy at 7:13 PM on May 30

Well, the bad news is that you're about two months late in asking the how to avoid this situation. And maybe this is you subconsciously telling yourself that you're not ready for college.

Assuming you do want to continue, though: by now, the damage is done, but you should 1. talk to your professors, and 2. talk to your academic adviser, post-haste. Explain the situation, express your desire to stay and not fail out, see what they can do. Your adviser, at least, should know you have a history of depression and should be able to act accordingly. Otherwise, spend as much time with friends and family doing things as possible. Anything to keep you from sitting and dwelling.


The "Good students", the ones who get As all the time, they pester their professors all the time, haggle over every little thing.
No, some of us just legitimately earned good grades.

posted by The Michael The at 7:15 PM on May 30 [16 favorites has favorites]

Also, what dirtynumbangelboy said.
posted by The Michael The at 7:15 PM on May 30

When I was younger (18-21, college age), I failed out of a major research college... twice.. with a GPA of 0.2. I was under the impression that it was the end of the world... I can, in fact, still recall in critical detal my sleepless night in the nearby diner wondering how I was going to handle this, what i was going to do... It was BAD.

I ended up going into a career that didn't require college education for a few years, and that career kicked my butt for a few years. I kept falling on my face due to disorganization, slackness, and other ... aspects, but learned a ton about myself, and how the world works. Fast forward a couple years, I left that job a significantly more mature, and wiser man. I'm now considered one of the more reliable people in that field, and despite having left, still get more than a few calls. I re-applied to the exact college that threw me out on my butt (twice), and was denied admission, but granted an admissions appeal, where I convinced the administration of my sincerity, drive, and growth.

I'm now at that very college, carrying a 3.9 (and annoyed by that 0.1 missing), with far less stress than I had last time, while I hold down a job as well.

I tell you this not to brag, but to illustrate a possibility -- while popular knowledge may not like this, some people are just not ready for the demand of college.. Maybe you should go spend some time in the world, and come back later? It's definitely possible to do.

I know you've posted this anon, so feel free to email me.. making this a bit of a logic puzzle to avoid any harvest bots that might come by:

first 4 characters: The exact type of mail i'm trying to avoid... also, a cheap meat product.

_ _ _ _catcher[at]floatingredwagon[dot]com
posted by frwagon at 7:36 PM on May 30 [3 favorites has favorites]

Yeah, I came to post what The Michael The said. As a usually mediocre student who occasionally pulled As, those As were purely the result of working harder and longer. No need to trash others to build yourself up.

To anonymous, college is not for everyone, and I'm not saying that in a pejorative sense at all. I know you're concerned about what kind of job you can get without a college degree, but have you considered what kind of jobs are available to people with BAs in English? If there's anything else you're interested in, particularly a trade, now would be a good time to explore it.
posted by telegraph at 7:39 PM on May 30

+1 to The Michael The's advice. I've been teaching undergraduate classes for about four years now, and if someone contacted me a couple of days before final grades were due with a situation like yours, I'm afraid my response would be "I'm truly sorry you're having such a difficult time and I wish we could have addressed the matter earlier, when there were still points to be earned over the semester. At this point all of your work is in and will need to stand or fall on its own merits; however, [if university policy permitted and your situation met the criteria] I would be happy to discuss the possibility of you taking a Withdrawal or an Incomplete for the semester." Much as nobody likes to see someone flunk out of their class or out of school altogether, we have to remember that instructors don't so much "give" students a particular grade as they document and record the grade that the student earned for him/herself. I genuinely would feel bad for you, it kills me to see people fail, but at this point in the semester I'm afraid there wouldn't really be an ethical way to just let you slide regardless of the reason.

Having said that, I've actually run into several previous students of mine who were in the same situation and ended up failing the class, but quite often things turn out not to be as dire as they had expected in the first place. At least two of them actually did manage to negotiate a way (with the help of their advisers) to remain in school or simply on probation rather than all-out dismissal; others have ended up elsewhere but still doing well for themselves - quite honestly I think the most crucial thing to remember is that no matter what happens, it's not the end of the world and life as you know it does not need to stop.

You'll still get up every morning, still go through your daily life, perhaps you'll find a job or other means of staying in NYC for now or perhaps you'll have to do something else for the time being - but it won't have to be forever. It seems to me that oftentimes the "crisis" moments in our lives loom so large that we lose sight of the fact that one day we will be past it - even if we don't yet know how. That's what I would advise you to focus on right now: somehow or other, Monday will come and go and your life will go on. Even if it may not seem like it right now this will someday be something you can remember not as a life-ending catastrophe, but rather as one more of the many things you have experienced and hopefully even learned something from. Good luck to you; you will be okay.

(as for the "students get As by pestering and haggling" ... ugh, I honestly couldn't disagree with that more, most of the ones I've seen have been B-performers wishing for A-grades but not doing A-work. As such, they get the Bs they earn, and even the very, very little "wiggle room" I ever feel I have available to give will just go right out the window and we'll do everything precisely by the book. In my experience, those people generally would have been far better served by putting their efforts into studying/working rather than contentiousness).
posted by DingoMutt at 8:00 PM on May 30 [10 favorites has favorites]

The "Good students", the ones who get As all the time, they pester their professors all the time, haggle over every little thing.

No, some of us just legitimately earned good grades.

"Some" being the key word in that sentence. It's also not exactly the case that students who pester their professors are not "legitimately" earning their grades, there may be a legitimate mistake on the part of the graders.
posted by delmoi at 8:07 PM on May 30

I teach intro science courses at a big public university, and I'm on the committee that deals with students who are asked to leave for a year due to low GPA.

Not to judge, just to give you information, if a student came to me after the end of the semester and said "I need at least a C minus in your class or else I flunk out of college" I would not be moved. I mean, I would be sympathetic, but I would give you whatever grade you earned. And I would be more sympathetic if you'd turned in the problem sets in my course. And I would probably say something like "Two months ago would have been a great time to talk to me about this." Again, no judging, just telling you what to expect. (On the other hand, I don't think there's much danger of a professor being so vindictive as to purposefully DENY you the threshold grade just because you bugged him or her about it..)

But this wasn't really your question: your question was how to alleviate your anxiety, and what plans you should make for the worst. From my experience on this faculty committee, the main thing I'd say is that this isn't the worst. The worst would be for you to keep showing up for classes in a half-hearted way and wasting your time. Which is why colleges ask you to take time off when you flunk courses. If you're out, move away from home to someplace cheap -- New York's a small place, and it sounds like you've never lived anywhere else.

Finally -- I hope you've discussed your psychological problems with the people at the university responsible for this decision. I know it can be embarrassing, but if you don't disclose this they'll be operating based on a serious misunderstanding of your situation.
posted by escabeche at 8:16 PM on May 30

As someone who failed out of college once, used a medical excuse to come back after a semester, and then flunked/dropped out again a year later, I can sympathize with your situation. It's an extremely awful feeling to think you let yourself and others down in that way. It feels terrible, but it is not a situation you can't recover from. I'm going to take a contrary position here and suggest that maybe you shouldn't attempt to remain in college at this time. Try getting a job that will enable you to pay the rent on a reasonable apartment, and instead of pursuing a degree, pursue the thing you wanted to use the degree for. College isn't for everyone, and there's no use digging yourself into an even deeper debt hole at this point. Taking charge of your life and owning your circumstances can boost your confidence, and sense of well-being. In short, use this moment of personal crisis to move forward.
posted by potch at 8:35 PM on May 30

It sounds like it is appropriate that you are anxious. That is a good thing, but recognize as frwagon said that even if 'the worst' happens your life will go on and you can still make good things of it. If you are ready to accept that scenario it will make the rest of your conversations much stronger as you will be acting out of a conviction to make this work out, not just a fear of what happens if you don't.

I agree with the recommendation to talk to your professors and offer whatever you can to improve things for yourself. However, be aware that the reactions you get are likely to be not entirely pleasant. The best I'd think you can hope for is to get some incompletes with an opportunity to make up some work, although when I did grading as a TA I would have only done that for someone with a clear reason they didn't complete the work (like major illness).

I'll echo the comments above that professors (at least good ones) don't give grades, they simply assess what grades you earned. And while students may indeed do grade mooching it has far less impact on final grades than either the moochers or the witnesses seem to think.

I also echo the suggestion that you discuss the situation with whoever is appropriate in your department or guidance. It is hard to know how they may help, but it is their job to navigate the sometimes obscure rules to help you.
posted by meinvt at 8:43 PM on May 30

The psychological problems are key, be sure you go to your adviser's office (right away on Monday) and talk to them about the semester. They'll listen to your situation at the bare minimum, let you know if it's possible to petition for withdrawls and incompletes (provided you get medical documentation . . . you need to get medical documentation), and generally give you good advice. They deal with students who are forced to leave all of the time, and they'll have some good ideas for you.

And just so you know, education is never a dead end - there will always be viable options for you, be they community and technical colleges or other schools - which can always transfer back to other programs if - and when - you decide to return to school. There are reasons why there are no age limits to undergraduate degrees . . .
posted by Think_Long at 8:43 PM on May 30

You said grades will be posted by Monday. They are what they are - there is nothing you can do between Friday night and Monday morning that will change them.
1. Get busy, get active - do things you enjoy, be around people, exercise.
2. Everytime you think about your grades in the next 2.5 days, tell yourself "NOT NOW". It might help to develop a visualization - pick something that identifies your science classes, picture it in front of you, then place in a box, close the lid, and place the box on a shelf. On the outside of the box, picture words "Do Not Open Until Monday". Everytime you start to worry, just put the worries back in the box. If you can't distract yourself with something else then just focus on the box (what does it look like, texture? colors? smell? where do you put? worry about these details instead of your actual problem.
3. No matter what your grades are, plan to call your advisor on Monday. Then you can start to think about what you want to do next.

WAIT UNTIL MONDAY TO READ THIS NEXT PART: Obviously if your grades are OK, then you have the option to stay in school but you should think about whether you are ready to be successful. Is it a problem of motivation and maturity? Is depression is still an issue? Would you do better with a lighter course load? Do you really want to be in college now - it is hard to be motivated if there is no real point to it.

If you don't stay at college, what do you want to do? I totally understand not wanting to fall back into high school life. Can you live with other relatives? Can you "earn" your food and rent by either paying your parents or doing specific chores? In addition to any work, find some volunteer work where you doing something that you really care about, making a difference in the world in some small way. You might also want to explore some certificate programs and two year degrees that might give you a more direct route to a career that you could get excited about.
posted by metahawk at 9:15 PM on May 30

See a therapist. If you cannot, see a regular doctor. If you are having depression that ruins your life, you need help. I know from experience. Zoloft and therapy saved me. Once you get this in order, try taking some classes at a community college. Community colleges can we awesome. Take what you like and try to have fun. You will feel productive and you will be doing something worthwhile. I went to one for a year, then moved on to an Ivy League school. Eventually your life will be in order. I had an awful time until I was 27, then it all kind of made sense. I love my life now.
posted by fifilaru at 9:51 PM on May 30

It sounds like you're missing some pretty key skills, and flunking out the first time, with a valid excuse, didn't help you learn them.

The problem you had this time around was not, according to your account, depression. What you did was presume that college is pretty much the same as high school; someone else is in charge, and you just go along day to day and try to meet your deadlines, not managing your time, not setting priorities or making goals, just floating along roughly doing what's asked of you. In spite of the fact that you spend the majority of your life being taught to function this way, it doesn't really work so well outside of high school. As far as I can tell, no one really teaches you the skills you need to survive outside of high school. You're expected to take on the responsibility of learning how to do this on your own. In my experience, most people don't.

One of the things that breaks my heart the most is that the people least qualified to get the most out college are the ones who end up there; recent high school grads. I went through something similar in my first term of undergrad, but when I saw that my grades weren't as good as they could be, I turned around really fast with a plan to make sure they'd be better the following term. (I've been a straight A student ever since, through undergrad, two master's programs and through phd course work, and I have never in my life contested or even questioned a grade: that's just a datapoint for delmoi.)

So maybe this is the wrong time for you to be in college. You won't be the first, and won't be the last. It's not the end of the world. It's not even the end of the possibility that you will, eventually, complete a degree.

Consider taking a leave (or walking away, if you have to) and getting a job. The advantage of this is that you really get to learn those key life skills in real time, and that will make it all different if/when you decide to come back. Try being financially independent for a while. It does wonders for giving you a sense of being in control of your life, for those skills you need to taking responsiblity for your own actions.

As for anxiety: my husband taught me in times of crisis that there's a way to stop your brain stirring around unpleasant thoughts: say to yourself "the". It means nothing, but your brain stops because it's waiting for the next part. When it cranks up again with unpleasant thoughts, just think it again: "the". It actually works.
posted by Hildegarde at 10:01 PM on May 30 [2 favorites has favorites]

I never turned in any of my homework in college, but ended up doing a lot of the problem sets in preparation for the exams. One of my professors let me turn in whatever notebooks I had with problems solved in them--after the final grade was posted--for 50% of the homework portion of the class (Disclaimer: in my case, it was a matter of getting a B+ rather than B-, so your professor might not let you do that in order to just pass the class). It's not too late to pester your professors. You have absolutely nothing to lose and could potentially gain a lot by contacting them.

Also, seconding Hildegarde: take a leave of absence, get a job for a while, even if you pass all your classes this semester. It doesn't sound like you are enjoying college at all.
posted by halogen at 11:38 PM on May 30

Obviously when I say "pester" I don't mean you should be obnoxious. You want to be as polite as you can.
posted by delmoi at 12:26 AM on May 31

Oh and another thing: The "Good students", the ones who get As all the time, they pester their professors all the time, haggle over every little thing. As someone who wasn't a good student, I found it a little unseemly, but it's what happens.

I'm sorry, but this is a total crock. Students who get A's generally do it by keeping up with their work, pulling the all-nighters that are necessary to turn in papers and problem sets in good condition and on time. In every class I've ever taught, the good students were almost universally the ones who showed up for class and worked hard. If you're not able to do that, then you have to ask yourself if college is the right place for you. Is it? It's not the right place for everybody, and there are a million other paths to success besides college.

Now, all that said, if I had a student who was in danger of failing out, who approached me and explained the situation and seemed to genuinely want to pull it together, I'd definitely be willing to work out some kind of deal to help him or her out. Maybe I'd give an incomplete so the student could turn in all his/her missing work for partial credit. I wouldn't just arbitrarily bump you up to a passing grade, but I'd like my students to succeed and would be willing to help make that happen if you legitimately tried to earn it.

So the first place to start is to approach your professors. Don't wait for your final grades: go now, be honest and humble, explain your fears, and see what they say. Unless you have committed some major academic fraud (cheated on a test, plagiarized a paper, etc.) I seriously doubt that anybody wants to be the one who's responsible for your getting kicked out of school.
posted by Fuzzy Dunlop at 2:04 AM on May 31

As I professor I also would feel the urge to say too bad you're out of luck. But I know that my university takes its responsibility to students with disabilities seriously and I couldn't get away with doing that even in the last days of the semester. You need to contact the disability office for students before talking to professors or advisors. Once that office is on your side, the professors, even the ones like me/us who want to say, "sorry, too late," really can't because of disability laws and policies. That's good news for you. Get your act together and get in touch with that office. They should handle communications with the teachers or back you up when you do so so that you won't fail.

You don't sound ready for adult responsibility. Living with your parents, enjoying Manhattan, slacking off in classes that cost your parents (?) money, those are signs that you need to work a while and of course get your mental health problems sorted out. Apart from your health issue, the other conditions are really common among your generation. I don't have much sympathy, but that office on campus gives me no choice-- good news for you.
posted by vincele at 3:48 AM on May 31

I already have depression and anxiety issues and this is the most stressed I've ever been about anything, ever / I have about six grand in savings--do I suck it up and stay with my parents until I find a job, or do I find an apartment first?

Seconding metahawk -- there's nothing you can do until your grades are posted (including contacting professors). Calm down, take a deep breath. Do what you can to distract yourself between now and then. Don't project plans based on information you don't have yet -- just breathe, and try to set this aside for a minute.

Even if the worst happens -- lots of smart and super-capable people have a hard time with school. Keep in mind that it isn't like the real world -- the work isn't naturally spaced over the end of the semester, a lot of it is arbitrary (problem sets, in particular, can feel really disconnected from "real work") and it can be a really competitive, unforgiving environment.

You don't sound ready for adult responsibility....Apart from your health issue, the other conditions are really common among your generation.

Vincele, trashing "the youth" and suggesting that the poster make use of the school's liberal disability policy doesn't seem very charitable for me. Just sayin'.
posted by puckish at 6:07 AM on May 31

To plan for the worst, you need to seriously get your shit together. You are 23, and still taking your entry-level courses, so I assume that you've actually taken more than 1 year off between high school and now.

You are just not ready for college. This is true for lots of young people (it was true for me, too, when I first left high school for college). My advice is to jump into the real world: Get a job, get an apartment, start paying your way in this world. In my experience, there is nothing like this to get you ready for college. When you work for little money, live leanly, have adult worries, and see others passing you by in the workplace based on their degree and your lack of one, it suddenly becomes very clear what to do. After several years of this, you will return to school completely fired up to excel (not just pass through). You'll do all the assignments, early. You'll make exceptional grades. And, you'll do this while studying and taking classes at night, so you can keep your job during the day. You'll master getting things done.

Until you have the drive, discipline, and desire to succeed in school, I think you'll continue to fail, and fluctuate between a lackadaisical attitude and sheer terror/anxiety/depression.
posted by Houstonian at 6:12 AM on May 31 [2 favorites has favorites]

Students who get A's generally do it by keeping up with their work, pulling the all-nighters that are necessary to turn in papers and problem sets in good condition and on time.

All-nighters are not the sign of an A student. An A students knows all the deadlines well in advance and prepares the paper days if not weeks ahead of the deadline.

As for problem sets or other assignments given out throughout the term with a short timeframe for turnaround, a good student allots the amount of time that is reasonable for the assigment based on how much its worth overall, and does not exceed that amount of time. If something is worth 1% of the final grade, it doesn't really make sense to spend days/nights fretting over it. You spend 2-3 hours on it, hand it in, and move on.

There is absolutely nothing more valuable to your ability to get your work done than a good night's sleep.

These are the kinds of skills you need to get through college; not just having the best methods, but being aware that you need methods in the first place to not just finish but to actually learn something, and that part of the battle is finding what works best for you.
posted by Hildegarde at 7:20 AM on May 31 [1 favorite has favorites]

I'm freaking 23 years old but feel like I'm 16. I don't feel capable of living on my own or getting a job in this economy with just a high school diploma and no serious work experience. I really don't get along with my parents and the year I spent living at home was horrible, but I'm worried that I'll end up moving back in with them just because it's easy and end up staying out of inertia, not paying rent or for food and just basically continuing to live like a high schooler. I have about six grand in savings--do I suck it up and stay with my parents until I find a job, or do I find an apartment first? Should I even be making these plans at all, or do I wait until I know for sure what's going on (after all, there's still a chance I could just barely make the grade. I studied like hell for the final but never feel completely confident with science/math-type stuff so I genuinely have no idea how I did, plus I also don't know how well I need to do since I haven't been bothering to pick up the quizzes and don't know the grade I got on a written assignment toward the end of the semester that was a decent chunk of our grade).

If I were in your position, I'd start applying for full-time jobs--any full time jobs (including at places like supermarkets and coffeeshops) immediately. If you can't afford an apartment in New York with the qualifications you have, you're undoubtedly living beyond your means and should head somewhere where you can survive on a realistic salary.

It sounds like it's time to lean what grown-up life is like--this means living with the consequences of your actions. In this case, the consequences of not completing all of your school work is probably going to be flunking out of school. In the grown-up world, as opposed to high school, there are consequences like these for every action--if you don't get a college diploma, you don't get a job that pays quite as much, and you have to find a place to live that you can afford. This isn't really a bad thing, at all. It will help you learn about your own capabilities and help you motivate yourself, because you will find that you have to motivate yourself to get what you want. Whatever you do, don't move back in with your parents. Maybe there are exceptions to this rule, but those parents I knew who let their twenty-somethings live at home rent free were never, ever doing their kids any favors, because then they end up living this sort of extended adolescence without any ramifications to their own irresponsibilities.

I'll say this, though--you are capable of finding a job, somewhere, on which you can support yourself. I have a ton of friends from college who dropped out and are nevertheless whole, successful, happy people in their own rights. College isn't the only way to be successful, and frankly (take it from someone with an English master's), most jobs you'll get with an English degree you could easily get without a degree. However, in any case, hard work will be necessary to get it.

"Some" being the key word in that sentence. It's also not exactly the case that students who pester their professors are not "legitimately" earning their grades, there may be a legitimate mistake on the part of the graders.

delmoi, clearly this isn't a case where the professor made a mistake--and OP knows it. Please don't encourage grade grubbing. Politely emailing the professor and asking for an incomplete so that you can actually do the work you owe is one thing (but don't assume they'll let you do it!), but, as an instructor, I had plenty of students write to me to whine about their grades, and it usually boiled down to their not wanting to do the work required of them, even as their were trying to get me to "give" them higher grades. As they were always C or B students who had earned those Cs or Bs, their arm twisting didn't get them anywhere, except, maybe to ensure that they wouldn't be getting letters of recommendation from me if they asked for them in the future. In my experience, as an instructor and a student, students who know what's expected of them, take those expectations seriously, and come to their professors during the course of the class if they have any questions or concerns (and take that feedback seriously) are the ones who earn As.
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 8:04 AM on May 31

frankly (take it from someone with an English master's), most jobs you'll get with an English degree you could easily get without a degree.

There's a huge difference in the jobs available to people with BA's whatever the subject and to people who have no BA.

A BA in English is not a death sentence in terms of a career. You're in the running for the same jobs as business majors or anyone else with a generic BA.

The difference is that English majors tend to have a slightly better command of the language. They can use prepositions, spelling, punctuation-- the basic writing skills that are no longer basic to college students.

An MA in English is an entirely different matter. I'd agree that it doesn't make you especially marketable for any particular job.
posted by vincele at 9:06 AM on May 31

Vincele, trashing "the youth" and suggesting that the poster make use of the school's liberal disability policy doesn't seem very charitable for me. Just sayin'.

Puckish, perhaps you're right. I intended to echo the other instructors who'd say tough luck, but I also wanted to point out that rigid disability policies are this student's friend.

Qualitatively there is a difference in the expectations of students today and students from 10-plus years ago.

When today's professors went to school, they generally did not expect special accommodations for "screwing around," in the words of the OP. That explains in part their resistance to requests like this from students today.

That generational gap also explains the perspective of professors on the one hand and students (and their parents) on the other.

Professors aren't going to be thrilled to accommodate this student. But like I said the office for disabilities will make sure they do.
posted by vincele at 9:28 AM on May 31

There's a huge difference in the jobs available to people with BA's whatever the subject and to people who have no BA.

A BA in English is not a death sentence in terms of a career. You're in the running for the same jobs as business majors or anyone else with a generic BA.

The difference is that English majors tend to have a slightly better command of the language. They can use prepositions, spelling, punctuation-- the basic writing skills that are no longer basic to college students.

Hey, I had a BA in English after college and was in the workforce with it. I made more money at my job (library para), which only required an associates' degree, than any of my English major camrades who went into publishing--jobs which usually, but didn't always, require a Bachelor's. No, it's not a death sentence; however, it doesn't mean that the time and expense necessary to expend to get one--particularly to a student who has already stretched out their undergraduate experience longer than most and isn't independently motivated--is worth it. OP should probably start researching and considering the type of jobs he or she wants during college and see what the actual qualifications are for them.

(Incidentally, I have an MFA, not an MA--which is a terminal degree and would be pretty helpful in getting teaching jobs, if I had any desire to teach anymore!)
posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 10:19 AM on May 31 [1 favorite has favorites]

Regardless of what happens this semester, you need to take some time off. Get a full time job or travel, something other than school. I failed out of school (cumulative under 2.0) and decided to travel around the country for a while. I've recently returned to school after a 7 year break and I have a 3.9 since I cam back.
posted by schyler523 at 11:32 AM on May 31 [1 favorite has favorites]

I once had a professor pull me aside and advise me to drop out of college. I wish I'd listened. I can't tell you how much I grew up between 18 and 24. If I went back now, no doubt I would've graduated with a much higher GPA and had many more options. It's not bad to take some time off of college so long as you remember to go back.
posted by OrangeDrink at 12:43 PM on May 31