Name our cafe!

March 3, 2004 1:43 PM

What would you name a cafe that was located in a dental school? (I'm looking for a clever play on words like "The Sweet Tooth" but funnier)
posted by ColdChef to Food & Drink (74 answers total)

Mastication. (sounds dirty!)
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 1:46 PM on March 3, 2004

Cafe T?

get it? cafe-t...cavity
posted by contessa at 1:47 PM on March 3, 2004

Flossie's?
posted by baltimore at 1:52 PM on March 3, 2004

Rinse 'n' Spit Cafe?
posted by baltimore at 1:52 PM on March 3, 2004

The Drill and Fill Grill
The Caveteria
posted by staggernation at 1:53 PM on March 3, 2004

Absession!

hahahahha
posted by corpse at 1:54 PM on March 3, 2004

Staggernation beat me to Caverteria by 60 seconds!
posted by daver at 1:54 PM on March 3, 2004

Carrie's.
posted by Danelope at 1:54 PM on March 3, 2004

Response by poster: Ha! Good stuff. Keep 'em coming.
posted by ColdChef at 1:55 PM on March 3, 2004

Can I change that to "Mutual Mastication"? Because nobody likes dining alone.
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 1:55 PM on March 3, 2004

Filling Station
posted by staggernation at 1:56 PM on March 3, 2004

For a Venice-themed café specializing in roasted potatoes, carrots, parsnips, etc.: Root Canal.
posted by Danelope at 1:57 PM on March 3, 2004

Bite.
posted by baltimore at 1:59 PM on March 3, 2004

The Yellowed Tooth?

That's what coffee does to mine.
posted by Shane at 2:00 PM on March 3, 2004

Bite Down or Mastication Station(my idea)
Open Wide or Chomper's (my husband's contribution)
posted by Orb at 2:00 PM on March 3, 2004

al dente
posted by baltimore at 2:01 PM on March 3, 2004

Amalgam-ated
posted by amberglow at 2:12 PM on March 3, 2004

The Upper BuyCustard
posted by staggernation at 2:13 PM on March 3, 2004

Nutrition For Your Dentition
The Jittery Chisel
Gum Shots
posted by Skot at 2:17 PM on March 3, 2004

Why are my pants around my ankles Cafe.
posted by machaus at 2:21 PM on March 3, 2004

Response by poster: Toothpick-nic Basket
posted by ColdChef at 2:22 PM on March 3, 2004

Vhe Dentah Shcoo Haffe' , complete with graphic of a patient with numerous ugly implements in his/her wide-open mouth.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 2:23 PM on March 3, 2004

Response by poster: The Happy Mouth?
posted by ColdChef at 2:25 PM on March 3, 2004

Response by poster: Ginger Vitis's?
posted by ColdChef at 2:27 PM on March 3, 2004

The Gumline
posted by mathowie at 2:30 PM on March 3, 2004

The (Other) Crown
Plaque Attack!
posted by Smart Dalek at 2:33 PM on March 3, 2004

The Overbite Cafe.

The QuickBite Cafe.
posted by jpoulos at 2:34 PM on March 3, 2004

rinse & spit.
posted by crunchland at 2:34 PM on March 3, 2004

arg
posted by crunchland at 2:35 PM on March 3, 2004

You Know The Drill
posted by Skot at 2:37 PM on March 3, 2004 [1 favorite]

MouthWash
posted by Smart Dalek at 2:39 PM on March 3, 2004

Guilt
posted by andrew cooke at 2:39 PM on March 3, 2004

Is It Safe?
The Devil's Mandible.
posted by dobbs at 2:40 PM on March 3, 2004

Jaw-va
posted by vacapinta at 2:40 PM on March 3, 2004

The Holey Molar
Bite Down
posted by squirrel at 2:42 PM on March 3, 2004

Overbite.

The "This may cause you some discomfort" Cafe.

Molar Molar.

Cavity Filler.

The Open Wider.

(What was the name of the dentist in Little Shop of Horrors? Aha!) Scrivello's.
posted by i_am_joe's_spleen at 2:43 PM on March 3, 2004

The Holey Molar (for a Christian affiliated school...)
posted by eastlakestandard at 2:44 PM on March 3, 2004

Damn, squirrel beat me to it.
posted by eastlakestandard at 2:44 PM on March 3, 2004

Flow-ride
posted by parrots at 2:46 PM on March 3, 2004

Apéritif
posted by Smart Dalek at 2:48 PM on March 3, 2004

(Or Flowright's)
posted by parrots at 2:49 PM on March 3, 2004

Flo'ss Diner
posted by Robot Johnny at 2:53 PM on March 3, 2004

What kind of food will be served?
posted by _sirmissalot_ at 3:00 PM on March 3, 2004

CafADA. (as in)
Tea for Tooth.
Pick Me Up.
Extraction.
posted by me3dia at 3:07 PM on March 3, 2004

Star Buccal
The Purple Ow
posted by joaquim at 3:09 PM on March 3, 2004

Root Cellar
Pulp Fixins

(Sadly, Crown Burgers is already taken.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 3:18 PM on March 3, 2004

)
posted by mr_crash_davis at 3:18 PM on March 3, 2004

say ahh cafe or ahh cafe or just ahh , fee please.
posted by sgt.serenity at 3:18 PM on March 3, 2004

"The Tooth is Out There"

Okay, just kidding. But the slogan should definitely be "Four out of Five Dentists Recommend It".
posted by taz at 3:41 PM on March 3, 2004

Down in the mouth?
posted by jasper411 at 3:41 PM on March 3, 2004

Peri O' Dontal's Irish Cafe
posted by inviolable at 3:47 PM on March 3, 2004

ooh, ooh... the "Partial Plate Cafe"!
posted by taz at 3:54 PM on March 3, 2004

Floating Tooth Cafe
Exlcusions (Services not covered by a dental policy)
The Co-Pay Cafe
Coffee to the Maxilla!
posted by inviolable at 4:04 PM on March 3, 2004

There is only one correct answer:

Toothsome
posted by kindall at 4:12 PM on March 3, 2004

The Perfect Palate, of course.
posted by _sirmissalot_ at 4:13 PM on March 3, 2004

Cafe Tartar
posted by scarabic at 4:20 PM on March 3, 2004

The Lead Apron
posted by amberglow at 4:21 PM on March 3, 2004

Fillings
posted by lilboo at 4:43 PM on March 3, 2004

ColdChef, did you just answer your own question?

My suggestion:
Oral Snax.
posted by armoured-ant at 5:40 PM on March 3, 2004

The Lead Apron

Love it.

NO2

And of course everything in the place must be coated in enamel.
posted by anathema at 5:42 PM on March 3, 2004

Java Bites!

or

Wisdom Cafe

or

Oral Cafe

or

Coffee Extract (or Cafe Extract)

or

Java Lingual

or

Cafe Lingual

Good luck!
posted by davidmsc at 5:44 PM on March 3, 2004

Response by poster: Thanks. These are all great. The LSU Dental School in New Orleans is renaming their newly remodeled cafe, and we were all riffing on what the new name should be.

These were all better than anything we could come up with. We're going to pass along these names to the school and hope that they have as good of a sense of humor as MeFi does.
posted by ColdChef at 6:00 PM on March 3, 2004

Chomp.
posted by troutfishing at 9:11 PM on March 3, 2004

Sensodine
posted by anathema at 9:57 PM on March 3, 2004

The Local Anaesthetic
Dribbly Chin's Cafe
Tooth Pull Istanbul
Jessie Mae's Tartar Scrapin' Break Spot
The Epiglottis
Cottonmouth's Coffeehouse

I pretty much have mascots in mind for each of these. Also, most of these would be better for bars, now that I think of it.
posted by furiousthought at 10:33 PM on March 3, 2004

Grind n' Go
posted by planetkyoto at 1:03 AM on March 4, 2004

Cuspid Cafe
posted by Dagobert at 2:41 AM on March 4, 2004

Molar & Pestle

The Crowning Glory

The Little Shop of Java

Kiss Me Kaffe

Have a Jamoke and a Smile

Java Java Everywhere (and not a drop to drink)

The Topical Cafe

Liquid Diet

Dental Damage
posted by Dagobert at 2:49 AM on March 4, 2004

Just say N₂O
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 4:34 AM on March 4, 2004

Brushes with Fame (If you're going for a celebrity-themed place)

Will customers come more than once every six months, though?
posted by emelenjr at 5:55 AM on March 4, 2004

Coffee Cavity
posted by Goofyy at 6:58 AM on March 4, 2004

For the record: wow.
posted by jragon at 9:36 AM on March 4, 2004

2.30
posted by johnny7 at 10:16 AM on March 4, 2004

The Bridge Too Bar
posted by squirrel at 1:06 PM on March 4, 2004