Home perm first timer!
March 22, 2025 2:39 PM Subscribe
I'm pretty much decided on perming my own hair. Is it true that you can back out of it by washing it within xx hours if you regret it? More idiotic questions and general requests for advice inside.
If Legally Blonde taught me anything, it's that you can't get your perm wet. But it's gonna be wet when I rinse the stuff out isn't it? Do I just let it dry by itself and see how it turns out?
Will the curl I have once it has dried be representative of what it will look like when I wash my hair normally? In other words, can I take a look at the result, go "omg what was I thinking?" and then wet it and forget it ever happend?
I am going to try and emulate the style Bobby is wearing in Lioness Season 2 (the curly mullet in this tiktok, not the swept back). Because it is more wavy than curly and my hair isn't quite as long, I am thinking of using a cream based solution and just doing little kinda finger curls instead of rolling and papers and things? Like if you twirled your finger against your scalp and made little nests. Does this sound feasible?
Last question: if I end up committing to it and it still wasn't great, am I likely to be able to brush out whatever the result is on a daily basis? Again, my hair is only about 3 inches long. It is quite fine with some grey mixed in.
Any other advice (excluding doing it at a salon) is welcome.
If Legally Blonde taught me anything, it's that you can't get your perm wet. But it's gonna be wet when I rinse the stuff out isn't it? Do I just let it dry by itself and see how it turns out?
Will the curl I have once it has dried be representative of what it will look like when I wash my hair normally? In other words, can I take a look at the result, go "omg what was I thinking?" and then wet it and forget it ever happend?
I am going to try and emulate the style Bobby is wearing in Lioness Season 2 (the curly mullet in this tiktok, not the swept back). Because it is more wavy than curly and my hair isn't quite as long, I am thinking of using a cream based solution and just doing little kinda finger curls instead of rolling and papers and things? Like if you twirled your finger against your scalp and made little nests. Does this sound feasible?
Last question: if I end up committing to it and it still wasn't great, am I likely to be able to brush out whatever the result is on a daily basis? Again, my hair is only about 3 inches long. It is quite fine with some grey mixed in.
Any other advice (excluding doing it at a salon) is welcome.
No matter what you do, if you hate it, you won't have to live with it for long. Three inches will grow out fast. And at only three inches, you should be able to mostly brush/blow dry it straight-ish, which is about what you have already, I presume?
posted by stormyteal at 3:47 PM on March 22
posted by stormyteal at 3:47 PM on March 22
If you haven’t already, can you do a one or two week trial where you style your hair like that daily (using heat tools each day or two, or whatever) and make sure you absolutely love it?
What are you planning to do when the perm grows out?
Also what stormyteal says, but as a question: are you willing to [live with it / chop your hair into a pixie / pay a professional to fix it / something else ??] if you do end up hating it?
I would also strongly co-sign have a friend to help you, it sounds like a lot to manage this yourself (or manage it well), the margin of error seems pretty huge, between rollers + chemicals.
Of all the beauty treatments to do at home, this one is not one I’d recommend to most people. It’s easy to tell yourself “ehh hair grows back!” in one moment, and have a meltdown about being stuck with a bad style for x# of months in the next. Unless you are remarkably unattached to your hair (few people are in my experience, but maybe you’re one!) I would proceed cautiously. Make sure you search your soul thoroughly for which type you are!
posted by seemoorglass at 4:10 PM on March 22
What are you planning to do when the perm grows out?
Also what stormyteal says, but as a question: are you willing to [live with it / chop your hair into a pixie / pay a professional to fix it / something else ??] if you do end up hating it?
I would also strongly co-sign have a friend to help you, it sounds like a lot to manage this yourself (or manage it well), the margin of error seems pretty huge, between rollers + chemicals.
Of all the beauty treatments to do at home, this one is not one I’d recommend to most people. It’s easy to tell yourself “ehh hair grows back!” in one moment, and have a meltdown about being stuck with a bad style for x# of months in the next. Unless you are remarkably unattached to your hair (few people are in my experience, but maybe you’re one!) I would proceed cautiously. Make sure you search your soul thoroughly for which type you are!
posted by seemoorglass at 4:10 PM on March 22
Speaking as victim of several home perms at the hands of my grandmother as a child, the one thing I vividly remember was that simply brushing the curls out on a daily basis in lieu of styling with heat tools produced what a bunch of six-graders perceived as "witch hair". Think first-movie Hermione Grainger.
You could probably straighten it daily with a flat iron and some product, or smooth a tight curl into larger loose ones with large-barrel curling iron.
As far as wetting your hair after a perm to make it go away, this will not work. Perm is short for "permanent wave" and it is called that for a reason. As I recall from my salon perm days in the 80s, washing your hair too soon after a perm could loosen the curl somewhat, but it isn't ever going to be like it was until it grows out and the permed part gets cut off.
posted by Serene Empress Dork at 6:16 PM on March 22 [1 favorite]
You could probably straighten it daily with a flat iron and some product, or smooth a tight curl into larger loose ones with large-barrel curling iron.
As far as wetting your hair after a perm to make it go away, this will not work. Perm is short for "permanent wave" and it is called that for a reason. As I recall from my salon perm days in the 80s, washing your hair too soon after a perm could loosen the curl somewhat, but it isn't ever going to be like it was until it grows out and the permed part gets cut off.
posted by Serene Empress Dork at 6:16 PM on March 22 [1 favorite]
A former hairdresser recommends a friend to help you roll your head on small rods, because you have fine hair, apply the solution onto the rods. and process the recommended time, rinse out very thoroughly after processing.
So you should have damp hair well rinsed on small rods quickly remove two rods and wrap it on a larger roller maybe three rocks to a roller, now you have your damp processed hair on rollers of the desired size. Fasten a hair net and leave the rollers in all day skip the neutralizer that comes with the kit.
this is called an air neutralized rod to roller transfer perm .
posted by hortense at 7:47 PM on March 22
So you should have damp hair well rinsed on small rods quickly remove two rods and wrap it on a larger roller maybe three rocks to a roller, now you have your damp processed hair on rollers of the desired size. Fasten a hair net and leave the rollers in all day skip the neutralizer that comes with the kit.
this is called an air neutralized rod to roller transfer perm .
posted by hortense at 7:47 PM on March 22
If you are not in the habit of putting your hair in rollers at the moment and are good at doing it yourself I’d not attempt to do this.
posted by koahiatamadl at 11:24 PM on March 22 [1 favorite]
posted by koahiatamadl at 11:24 PM on March 22 [1 favorite]
Response by poster: Love to the people who read my post and still think I’m a person who would get and use tools to practice style this for two weeks. Your faith in me is beautiful but misplaced. Those advising not to etc, don’t worry, if I don’t like it I am happy to shave my head.
I accept the answers saying Legally Blonde lied. A disappointment, but good to know it’s all in.
Everything I see about rollers, especially for this short hair is showing very tight curls, like ringlets, which I don’t want, I just want very loose. The two rod air neutralized method sounds like it would be a good one, but let’s be honest, I’m not gonna do that (anyhow not this time). Would the little “nests” I describe give absolutely no effect or just very little effect? If I’m going to get rods, what size to get closest to the curl patten in the vid? I see a lot of guys on the vids whose perms are vey “short and curly” looking if you know what I mean, not into that.
posted by Iteki at 5:13 AM on March 23 [1 favorite]
I accept the answers saying Legally Blonde lied. A disappointment, but good to know it’s all in.
Everything I see about rollers, especially for this short hair is showing very tight curls, like ringlets, which I don’t want, I just want very loose. The two rod air neutralized method sounds like it would be a good one, but let’s be honest, I’m not gonna do that (anyhow not this time). Would the little “nests” I describe give absolutely no effect or just very little effect? If I’m going to get rods, what size to get closest to the curl patten in the vid? I see a lot of guys on the vids whose perms are vey “short and curly” looking if you know what I mean, not into that.
posted by Iteki at 5:13 AM on March 23 [1 favorite]
I don’t know exactly what you mean about nests but I have very fine, slightly wavy hair that gets easily flattened by hats, so one day this winter I decided to twist sections of my hair into loops/nests and pin it down under my hat hoping I could get to work and it would be curly. It looked completely insane. The curls were much tighter than I expected and they jutted out at all angles and there were little kinks where the curls weren’t exactly laying perfectly and let me tell you, you do not want to permanently have your hair like that.
If you’re not sure, you can try just wetting your hair or maybe using some gel or other product and letting it dry in the “nests” or do rag curls and see how that goes. You’d have to be really good at doing that just with water/product and air drying before I’d give the go ahead to try it with perm solution.
posted by misskaz at 6:03 AM on March 23 [4 favorites]
If you’re not sure, you can try just wetting your hair or maybe using some gel or other product and letting it dry in the “nests” or do rag curls and see how that goes. You’d have to be really good at doing that just with water/product and air drying before I’d give the go ahead to try it with perm solution.
posted by misskaz at 6:03 AM on March 23 [4 favorites]
Best answer: Also I would be worried about the perm solution being directly on your scalp with your nests idea. That could go the way of serious chemical burns.
posted by misskaz at 6:16 AM on March 23 [4 favorites]
posted by misskaz at 6:16 AM on March 23 [4 favorites]
Washing out a perm will wash out the curl but leave your hair frizzy from the chemicals. From what I understand (could be wrong), it basically lightly melts your hair around the rollers and the neutralizer stops it.
It might help you to go on youtube and look up "how to home perm". Find a video that gives the kind of curls/waves you want and use that as a guide. It would really make it easier for you if you have a friend to help you. Like Lyn Never said, it's really hard to do the back of your head by yourself and it's really tiring.
posted by stray thoughts at 3:08 PM on March 23
It might help you to go on youtube and look up "how to home perm". Find a video that gives the kind of curls/waves you want and use that as a guide. It would really make it easier for you if you have a friend to help you. Like Lyn Never said, it's really hard to do the back of your head by yourself and it's really tiring.
posted by stray thoughts at 3:08 PM on March 23
Based on the vibes, I’d like to nominate this thread for Best of Metafilter
posted by toodleydoodley at 5:49 PM on March 23 [2 favorites]
posted by toodleydoodley at 5:49 PM on March 23 [2 favorites]
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What will happen if you overwash after getting a perm is that you will get a) breakage because the hair is so fragile b) whatever you trained it to do will just go wonky - it will NOT fix the damage or "undo" the set, it will just screw up the "training" inconsistently. People are generally encouraged not to wash for as long as possible after the perm process (which yes, involves neutralizing and then cleaning the toxic chemicals off your head, that is not the "wash" that is to be avoided) so it can rest and you can get a little natural hair oil regenerated, including on your fairly abused scalp.
You want the rollers because you want the tension on the hair while you're frying it, and tension all the way to the root. Looking at Bobby's curly mullet, you really want to perm that on maybe a med-large roller and then you should be able to air-dry and finger-style with texture paste and/or gel and not have to use a curling iron except maybe to do a little touch-up around the front.
Unless your hair is board-straight you can probably get away with a "body wave", which is gentler chemicals and doesn't produce such a hard curl, it does more moderate damage to create texture. I'd use the method in this video.
...A quick online shop, though, suggests that it's not as easy to buy the body wave kits I used to get? I do not see anything specifically marked as "body wave" anymore though I did see it referenced in some videos. Maybe modern perm kits are gentler now - when I used to do perms the runoff of the perm solution over my face would lightly bleach rivulets onto my skin for several hours. That cannot be healthy.
And if you have a willing friend, it is SO MUCH EASIER to roll the back of your head right if the arms are not your own. My aunt and grandmother use to do each others' at the dining room table and could roll up a 3"-all-over hairdo in like 15m each, and it'd take an hour or more with breaks to do it alone.
posted by Lyn Never at 3:39 PM on March 22 [5 favorites]