How do I become a person who mends their own clothes?
August 8, 2023 4:36 AM   Subscribe

I have a few garments like cardigans with holes in the seams, especially under the arm, and jeans with wear on the thighs. I'd like to mend these by hand. It doesn't have to look professional, in fact I love the look of visible mending. But where do I even begin? The most I have ever done is to sew a loose button back on.

I would love to know if there are Youtubers I can follow or books I should get that would help, as well as your own personal tips for beginners. Is there a basic kit I should get/put together? I see 'sewing kits' on Amazon but I don't know how much I should be spending for what type of quality. How do I choose the type of thread to use for a project?

I don't want to create anything, I just want to be able to fix most things that become worn. I don't need a sewing machine, as I acquired one a few years ago, became overwhelmed by it and never used it. I have ADHD and I'm a recovering perfectionist, so it's important to keep things simple. Thanks for your help!
posted by guessthis to Clothing, Beauty, & Fashion (30 answers total) 46 users marked this as a favorite
 
Best answer: Embroidery thread is a fun way to have some bright colours for mending.

My kit is some needles, various threads, and a good pair of scissors. A useful addition is a ball, mine is about tennis ball size but smooth (used for four square, down ball etc in school yards)- this is for evenly stretching the fabric and stopping me sewing things together that shouldn't be.

Small holes are the easiest to tackle. This darning tutorial is how I've patched multiple pairs of my children's leggings. But I got started by adding some embroidery flowers to cover up some holes on a coat.
posted by freethefeet at 4:56 AM on August 8, 2023 [8 favorites]


Oh! And patching. The jeans can be patched with fabric. A thimble is helpful if you're sewing denim.
posted by freethefeet at 4:58 AM on August 8, 2023 [2 favorites]


Best answer: You become a person who mends their own clothes just by mending one of your own clothes, and then not stopping.

Is there a basic kit I should get/put together?

The kit you should start with is whatever thread you guess will do a halfway reasonable job of the repair you intend to tackle first, plus a needle with an eye big enough to admit that thread, and a pair of sharp, pleasant to hold scissors that from this day forth will become The Good Scissors and never never never used for anything but cutting thread and fabric.

Extend the kit as problems arise that you need solutions to. For example, the first time you try to push a needle through more than two layers of denim, you're going to understand why thimbles are a thing. But really, just a needle, thread and scissors is all you're going to need in the first instance. Don't let assembling the perfect sewing kit become a stumbling block on your way toward actually making repairs.
posted by flabdablet at 5:03 AM on August 8, 2023 [17 favorites]


Best answer: The subreddit /r/Visiblemending is not a bad place to start - not all posts are super-detailed but it gives you an idea of what's possible and people are generally very generous with their knowledge. There's a very minimal associated wiki and they also recommend the book (free on Google Books) Thrift with a Needle.

My personal advice:
- Rather than try to create a kit, I'd recommend buying supplies one mending project at a time (exception would maybe be if you don't have any local access to a brick-and-mortar sewing supplies store). You'll gradually accumulate the tools you need but this will save you from buying tools for a mend that you're never actually going to get around to. Mending takes time and you will get a sense of what kinds of mends are "worth it" for you as you go.
- As a general rule you want the weight of your patches and threads to match the weight of the existing fabric that you're trying to repair, although obviously you sometimes have to make compromises.
- When reinforcing worn fabric (like your jeans) or patching, always make the patch/reinforcement bigger than you think you're going to need.
- For color matching/complementing, cotton embroidery thread and sewing thread (usually polyester, cotton, or a blend) both have loads of color options, so that's what I tend to mend with.
- Sashiko is a technique for patching and reinforcing fabric that I bet you'd like a lot! You can do it with sashiko-specific thread (often comes in a relatively-limited range of colors) or with something like embroidery thread and a long sharp needle.
posted by mskyle at 5:05 AM on August 8, 2023 [11 favorites]


During covid I noticed small holes in athletic socks and had some darning thread and needles around and it was surprisingly easy to make a functional if ugly patch with the wrong color. The one bit of advice I would not have thought about was do not put a knot in the thread.

As for a kit, maybe watch yard sales, all the possible threads and needles in a sewing store would be pricey. Maybe get supplies one job at a time and build up a sewing box.
posted by sammyo at 5:20 AM on August 8, 2023 [2 favorites]


And do spent a bit of time with your sewing machine, they are fiddly but for a long straight seam all the setup and fussiness is totally worth it. So may youtube videos that really help.
posted by sammyo at 5:22 AM on August 8, 2023 [1 favorite]


Look up sashiko repair for some good examples of deliberately visible repair.
posted by Jobst at 5:29 AM on August 8, 2023 [4 favorites]


Normally I'd avoid kits, but here if you don't have anything I actually would get started with just a basic sewing kit that has
- needles
- possibly pins
- an unpicker (seam ripper)
- ideally one of those cheap metal needle threaders to save on annoyance
- little spools of thread in a bunch of colors.

I don't think you even need to think about special scissors at this point - I used regular household ones for years. These kits can cheap - I once bought a really good quality one for $1.50 sans thread at a dollar store. If money's no object by all means treat yourself to top equipment - but there's really no need when you're starting out.

You might find with different clothes that you need something that's not in your kit - different thread, some elastic, some snaps or buttons, etc. But they're a good place to start.

And then, like flabdablet says, just start. Once you've tried a repair or two you'll have more specific questions you can look up on YouTube or wherever. Remember that you can (almost) always unpick stitches and seams if you don't think they've come out well.
posted by trig at 5:30 AM on August 8, 2023 [2 favorites]


I posted this on the blue a few years ago, and for some reason the blog has taken it down. But here is the archive.org link:
How We lost our Ability to Mend
posted by soelo at 6:09 AM on August 8, 2023 [5 favorites]


The same author writes at Put This On and here is their page of articles about making repairs.
posted by soelo at 6:11 AM on August 8, 2023 [3 favorites]


Seams are a fantastic place to start. You’ll want embroidery thread — you can do it with sewing-machine thread, but it twists the wrong way and tangles easily. Just have several goes at stitching it back together, to be honest. Secure each end with good knots. The payoff is so great.
posted by lokta at 6:12 AM on August 8, 2023 [2 favorites]


A person who sews loose buttons back on is a person who mends their clothes, so congratulations, you've already started. You're building on your basics now.

nthing embroidery floss as a good basic mending thread. It's smooth, strong, comes in nearly any color you want, and works on a range of fabrics. It's worth it to spend on thread, in my opinion - cheap thread snags, frays, and tangles and makes sewing more of a headache than it needs to be.

I get a lot of mileage out of my embroidery scissors for mending - more than either my regular fabric scissors or seam ripper, although those are good tools, too. The fine tips are really helpful for trimming and working in awkward areas.

I've found that a cheap rubber jar opener, like the freebies businesses hand out, often works better for me than a thimble. As long as I can get the needle through the fabric enough to get a grip on the sharp end, I find it easier to pull than push, but sometimes on thick or dense fabrics, you really do need a thimble.
posted by EvaDestruction at 6:51 AM on August 8, 2023 [1 favorite]


I find decent sewing tools in thrift stores and yard sales on the regular. Worth keeping an eye out. Buttons, darning eggs, bodkins, all kinds of handy odds and ends. Thread and elastic there will often be old and weak, not as useful.

A place to keep buttons! Spares that come with good clothes, single ones that turn up with the laundry/vacuuming, sets of nice ones from discarded clothes or thrifting (loop sets onto a scrap of thread to keep them together). I drank a lot of over-marketed tea for the excellent little tins that snap together, but One Big Button Jar is classic.
posted by clew at 7:01 AM on August 8, 2023 [3 favorites]


I found a kit from this shop and have slowly picked up skills by reading blogs or watching videos on Instagram or YouTube. I found that using a darning loom helped me mend holes in socks and other garments more neatly than I would have been able to do freehand, so that might help you feel more satisfied with the end result.
posted by Maeve at 7:19 AM on August 8, 2023 [3 favorites]


Best answer: One thing I have done is get clothing at a thrift store and practice my skills on those - not my beloved hole-y jeans! It's been great for practice, and I can get clothes for well under $10. And if I finish working on it, and I haven't ruined it but I don't want to wear it, I can just donate it back. It's like renting practice equipment, basically.
posted by hepta at 7:41 AM on August 8, 2023 [6 favorites]


I've used this video from Repair What You Wear several times for patching the thighs of jeans (Top tip: Use stretchy material, ie. an old pair of jeans with stretch in - I bought a cheap pair second hand specifically for patching).

They have lots of other helpful videos, with left-handed and right-handed versions of various common mends and stitches.
posted by penguin pie at 7:48 AM on August 8, 2023 [1 favorite]


I just recently checked out several books on mending from the library. The best of them were Mending Life by Sonya Montenegro and Creative Mending by Hikaru Noguchi. And I want to nth what others said above -- you become a person who mends by mending. The more you do it, the better you will get at it.
posted by OrangeDisk at 7:53 AM on August 8, 2023 [1 favorite]


Best answer: Here is a YouTube playlist I put together on basic mending and sewing. It has 35 different videos from dozens of creators. If I were you I'd just scroll down until something caught my eye and then do it!
posted by seasparrow at 8:30 AM on August 8, 2023 [5 favorites]


Just wanted to mention, if you are using embroidery thread, that it usually comes 6 strands of thread twisted together. Cut off the length you need and then you can separate the thread into the number of strands you will need to suit the fabric you are mending. Jeans, for instance, can take mending with more threads than a linen blouse would.
posted by sarajane at 8:50 AM on August 8, 2023 [3 favorites]


Best answer: Something that has helped me with mending is - knitting. Not because the techniques are the same, but because it gives you a sort of quick-and-dirty understanding of the "building blocks" for fabric and how it's made, and that in turn can give you a fractionally better understanding of how mending things work.

For example: You can understand a little better where you need to work and where you need to start stitching to create a better "anchor" in the fabric you're trying to mend. One of the biggest issues I would have when mending things was that I'd try to sew two halves of a rip together, but the stitches I'd make would slide right out of the fabric on one side and I'd have to re-mend it. But when I saw that I was anchoring the stitches on that one side in a place where the threads would just let it slide through, I'd find a better place for my stitches and would have more success.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 9:17 AM on August 8, 2023 [1 favorite]


If you're looking to do things by hand, you'll probably find utility in Bernadette Banner's book Make, Sew and Mend. I don't have my copy in front of me, but I believe she has a pretty good list of items you want to have in a sewing kit in the book along with descriptions of various stitches and their relative strengths and weaknesses. Her YouTube channel also features a lot of sewing, though it is usually making garments from scratch, not mending worn clothes.
posted by little king trashmouth at 10:29 AM on August 8, 2023 [2 favorites]


I recently assembled a basic mending kit for a beginner. Here's what I put in it.
- A pack of needles (a set like this one from Clover is a good starting place -- avoid Dritz needles, which are poor quality and troublesome to work with )
- A needle threader (not strictly necessary, but it can be helpful for beginners)
- Some regular cotton/polyester thread in black and white (the Coats & Clark Dual Duty All Purpose Thread you can find in most craft/sewing stores is just fine)
- A few twists of embroidery thread in colors that match or clash with your wardrobe, as you prefer
- A pair of small embroidery scissors for clipping threads
- A pair of fabric shears for cutting patch fabric. Don't use them for anything but fabric, or they'll get dull.
- A thimble (note that these come in different sizes -- you'll need one that fits the middle finger of your dominant hand)
- depending on the type of mending you wish to do, you may also want to add some buttons and some patching fabric to your kit (fat quarters of quilting cotton are cheap and versatile for patching, though you will want to wash and dry them to pre-shrink them). Over time, as you mend, you will likely accumulate a small stock of useful scraps.

The whole kit can be had for about $35-40 new -- or much less if you go to a second hand shop, where you can often buy these components very cheaply (sometimes I see them all together in a nice sewing box). As you get into mending, you may also find you want to pick up a small embroidery hoop (useful for holding the fabric taut while you stitch it) and/or a darning egg (useful for darning socks -- though personally, I use one of those LED lightbulbs with a sturdy plastic dome).

For any given item that you need to mend, you can search YouTube and find great tutorials. Mending Life, the book referenced above, is a great introduction that explains a number of basic techniques (like darning, patching, and sashiko), and you can use those terms to search for YouTube tutorials. Here's a webpage with a few common techniques, like repairing a hem, a strap, and a button.

Most of all -- enjoy the process! No matter how it looks in the end, it can be immensely satisfying to pour love and attention into your clothes, making them last longer and making them more uniquely yours.
posted by ourobouros at 10:42 AM on August 8, 2023 [3 favorites]


Best answer: First off, you're going to need a tin of butter cookies and an appetite for cookies so you end up with an empty tin. Once you have a butter cookie tin with any sort of sewing supplies in it you are officially a mender. (I actually prefer one of these boxes with the padded top, but the upside of the tin is that magnets stick to it.)

Like a lot of practical skills, you do it just by trying it. A lot of the tutorials will make a lot more sense once you have a little experience just putting needles and thread through fabric. Grab some scrap cloth or an old towel or gardening/painting shirt and just put some holes and tears in them, give an untrained shot at fixing, hemming, and reinforcing.
posted by Lyn Never at 10:42 AM on August 8, 2023 [8 favorites]


Best answer: This is a one-off hint because you have LOTS of great advice, but a quick tip: don't use black or white thread on anything not black or white, it will really, really show. I'd buy a light and medium gray, your eye just sort of skips over it as long as it's a similar lightness or darkness as the fabric even if the fabric is a bright colour.
posted by Sweetchrysanthemum at 10:50 AM on August 8, 2023 [6 favorites]


Erin Lewis-Fitzgerald literally wrote the book on Modern Mending. She's a wealth of knowledge and also runs a great Facebook page and group with lots of member engagement and inspiration.
posted by hydra77 at 12:44 PM on August 8, 2023 [3 favorites]


Best answer: When I started this a year ago or so, I just checked out whatever my library had on ebook at that exact moment. Later I read some other specific titles that had been recommended, but the basics in those were all the same as what I found in my initial opportunistic search. So I think what this means is, don't worry too much about the source of the info. If you have a library card, go check Libby and see what they have!
posted by librarina at 4:57 PM on August 8, 2023 [3 favorites]


I’ve used this visible mending book, but she also has video classes if that’s more your speed.
posted by Bunglegirl at 7:18 PM on August 8, 2023 [1 favorite]


Response by poster: Thanks so much for the wonderful advice, everyone! It really resonated to hear that I am already someone who mends clothes, and also that I can just try whatever and that's fine. So I picked up some embroidery floss and a needle and decided to just get stuck in sewing randomly over a hole in an old t-shirt. My stitches are wonky and it's kinda weird looking, but much nicer than I anticipated. And it was fun! I want to cover the whole t-shirt in random bits of stitching now.
posted by guessthis at 4:41 AM on August 10, 2023 [5 favorites]


My stitches are wonky and it's kinda weird looking, but much nicer than I anticipated.

You've reminded me of another good point - for fancier and finer garments, like dress shirts, you'd be better off taking it to a tailor for anything above and beyond sewing on buttons or re-stitching a couple of loose threads in a hem. I have some good shirts I wouldn't trust myself to mend.

But for some more casual things, the DIY approach can be fun and can actually add to it. I just got a pair of hippie-ish yoga pants while on a trip to Woodstock, that already look all patchworky and stuff. I wore them a lot on my vacation and it already developed some small splits in a seam and by a pocket, but I just shrugged and sewed them shut; I have some fairly strong orange thread, the kind they use in jeans, and I used that for the mended bits. It kind of blends in with the pattern, and even if you look close, it totally looks like the kind of thing a hippie would do ("aw, crap, my pants ripped - what the hell, lemme just sew 'em and who cares if it doesn't match") so it still works.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 7:04 AM on August 10, 2023 [2 favorites]


Remember to rest and stretch your hands, fingers and neck. They will cramp. Fatigue will also cause the needle to slip and poke you.

I also find that investment in a roll of rubbery shelf grip liners let’s you cut pieces to grip a slippery needle to pull the thread through. Sometimes the thimble needs extra help
posted by ayc200 at 8:58 AM on August 11, 2023 [1 favorite]


« Older Replacement for digits?   |   How to get my stuff to Burning Man? Newer »

You are not logged in, either login or create an account to post comments