What if this house is the one? House-hunting (and buying) tips, please!
April 1, 2021 8:22 AM Subscribe
A house just came on the market -- it's adorable and looks to be in a great location. I will hopefully be seeing it tonight. What if I love it? Should I make an offer? How will I know this is the right house for me? (Especially in a very hot market, where time is of the essence).
I am a first-time buyer. I am in a very hot market, with lots of houses getting multiple bids above asking and staying on the market for only a couple days.
My home-buying process has also gone very fast so far! I got pre-approval from a local credit union, then ended up going with a realtor that my loan officer recommended (I spoke to a few, but she was the one I liked best). I have been unable to go to any showings so far because of scheduling and weather conflicts, so my first showing will likely be tonight after work.
This morning, a house came on the market that I fell in love with right away. It has almost everything on the wish-list and I can just see myself there. But I haven't even seen a single house in person yet! My realtor is trying to get me a showing of this house tonight.
If I am able to see this house tonight, what should I keep in mind? If I am still in love after the showing, should I put in an offer right away? (I'm worried that if I don't, I'll miss it -- houses really are going that fast).
My boyfriend is coming with me to the showing, and he is an experienced homebuyer with a much more engineering-focused mindset, so I know he's going to ask a lot of practical questions about the condition of the house. I'm not really looking for suggestions on more questions in that vein...
What I'm most concerned about is, how do I know this house is the right house for me?
I am a first-time buyer. I am in a very hot market, with lots of houses getting multiple bids above asking and staying on the market for only a couple days.
My home-buying process has also gone very fast so far! I got pre-approval from a local credit union, then ended up going with a realtor that my loan officer recommended (I spoke to a few, but she was the one I liked best). I have been unable to go to any showings so far because of scheduling and weather conflicts, so my first showing will likely be tonight after work.
This morning, a house came on the market that I fell in love with right away. It has almost everything on the wish-list and I can just see myself there. But I haven't even seen a single house in person yet! My realtor is trying to get me a showing of this house tonight.
If I am able to see this house tonight, what should I keep in mind? If I am still in love after the showing, should I put in an offer right away? (I'm worried that if I don't, I'll miss it -- houses really are going that fast).
My boyfriend is coming with me to the showing, and he is an experienced homebuyer with a much more engineering-focused mindset, so I know he's going to ask a lot of practical questions about the condition of the house. I'm not really looking for suggestions on more questions in that vein...
What I'm most concerned about is, how do I know this house is the right house for me?
How did you know your boyfriend is the right person for you? Likely he met a bunch of checklist items and also, you just knew. Same with a house. Assuming it is structurally sound, you will know. I have bought and sold 4 houses. 2 of them were the either the first one I saw or one of 3 I saw on the first day.
If you still like the house after you see it, sit down with your real estate professional and discuss a strategy. Know your top number and do not exceed it. Be willing to walk at your top number. Fwiw, for those 2 houses I mentioned above, I gave my best offer first. Best and final. I subsequently found out that someone bid slightly higher on one, but because I stepped up right away, the seller chose me. YMMV.
posted by AugustWest at 8:28 AM on April 1, 2021 [6 favorites]
If you still like the house after you see it, sit down with your real estate professional and discuss a strategy. Know your top number and do not exceed it. Be willing to walk at your top number. Fwiw, for those 2 houses I mentioned above, I gave my best offer first. Best and final. I subsequently found out that someone bid slightly higher on one, but because I stepped up right away, the seller chose me. YMMV.
posted by AugustWest at 8:28 AM on April 1, 2021 [6 favorites]
Make an offer, but be sure to make it contingent on your satisfaction with the home inspection. I am house-hunting myself right now. Good luck!
posted by NotLost at 8:29 AM on April 1, 2021 [9 favorites]
posted by NotLost at 8:29 AM on April 1, 2021 [9 favorites]
I just knew. More specifically, I knew that my partner wanted it to be our house, and it somehow felt like it could be our house. Although it was an older house so would certainly need some work on it, I know a lot of people who've bought similar houses so was confident that we could handle (and pay for) any work required.
I think if it is not a stretch financially, and you are confident that you can handle the most likely problems that arise with a property of its era and condition, then if you still want to buy it having viewed it then put in an offer.
posted by plonkee at 8:30 AM on April 1, 2021
I think if it is not a stretch financially, and you are confident that you can handle the most likely problems that arise with a property of its era and condition, then if you still want to buy it having viewed it then put in an offer.
posted by plonkee at 8:30 AM on April 1, 2021
Just don't talk yourself into making an offer. I've also viewed a house that from the photos and description had almost everything on my wishlist and I could see myself living there. I still would prefer to live on that street. IRL it didn't gel in the same way and I have absolutely no regrets about passing it up.
posted by plonkee at 8:32 AM on April 1, 2021 [4 favorites]
posted by plonkee at 8:32 AM on April 1, 2021 [4 favorites]
I think my then-fiancée (or maybe just boyfriend?) and I made an offer on the first place we saw - we really loved it and I think we would have been very happy there, but our offer was not accepted and we ended up in a very different kind of home in a very different neighborhood (which we also loved!). So while I definitely believe you can fall in love with a home, I also don't think there's only one home for you out there, and it's a little dangerous to get too attached to any one home.
I think the biggest things to keep in mind have to do with what can be changed about the house, and how easily they can be changed. Location can't be changed - if you don't like the neighborhood, you can't fix that. Or, like, my house is built into the side of a hill and there is no way onto the main floor of the house that doesn't involve a full flight of stairs, and that will always be the case. Then there are things that can be changed, but not easily or cheaply - the footprint of the major rooms of the house, arrangement of kitchen cabinets and appliances, etc. Then you have sort of your medium changes, like kitchen cabinets and countertops or plumbing fixtures, and then your easy changes, like paint/wallpaper and cabinet hardware and stuff like that.
If you have a gut feeling that the house is not right for you when you're there, that's important too.
posted by mskyle at 8:37 AM on April 1, 2021 [11 favorites]
I think the biggest things to keep in mind have to do with what can be changed about the house, and how easily they can be changed. Location can't be changed - if you don't like the neighborhood, you can't fix that. Or, like, my house is built into the side of a hill and there is no way onto the main floor of the house that doesn't involve a full flight of stairs, and that will always be the case. Then there are things that can be changed, but not easily or cheaply - the footprint of the major rooms of the house, arrangement of kitchen cabinets and appliances, etc. Then you have sort of your medium changes, like kitchen cabinets and countertops or plumbing fixtures, and then your easy changes, like paint/wallpaper and cabinet hardware and stuff like that.
If you have a gut feeling that the house is not right for you when you're there, that's important too.
posted by mskyle at 8:37 AM on April 1, 2021 [11 favorites]
Just like dating, you should really tour more than one house to see what you don't like, even if they are not in your price range or exact desired area. Date some houses! Imagining your life in each one is kinda fun.
posted by The_Vegetables at 8:46 AM on April 1, 2021 [2 favorites]
posted by The_Vegetables at 8:46 AM on April 1, 2021 [2 favorites]
If you love it, yes you should work with your real estate agent and make an offer right away. They will be able to tell you if there are other offers or if it has been on the market for a while and it's ok to slowplay.
posted by The_Vegetables at 8:47 AM on April 1, 2021 [1 favorite]
posted by The_Vegetables at 8:47 AM on April 1, 2021 [1 favorite]
It's hard in this market, especially at the price range that fits most first-time buyers. Trust your gut to some degree.
I'd be a bit wary of an evening showing: while you'll be able to evaluate the space, you won't have a sense of how it feels in natural light, nor where you might get the greatest temperature variability. You can use a compass to guesstimate, but that's not the same, and it's one of those things (per mskyle) that can't really be changed.
A lot of this will depend upon the specific laws in your location surrounding what an offer entails in terms of commitments and contingencies.
posted by holgate at 9:00 AM on April 1, 2021 [9 favorites]
I'd be a bit wary of an evening showing: while you'll be able to evaluate the space, you won't have a sense of how it feels in natural light, nor where you might get the greatest temperature variability. You can use a compass to guesstimate, but that's not the same, and it's one of those things (per mskyle) that can't really be changed.
A lot of this will depend upon the specific laws in your location surrounding what an offer entails in terms of commitments and contingencies.
posted by holgate at 9:00 AM on April 1, 2021 [9 favorites]
I am also house hunting and toured a house that I was really excited about. I was considering putting in an offer, but by the time I arrived back home, I had changed my mind. And I don't regret it. There were a lot of things I really liked about the house, but I realized the negatives outweighed them. Also, the pictures can be really deceptive. Rooms look so much bigger in the pictures and they can also hide flaws.
I am also in a hot market, and figure if somebody else gets a house that I wanted, then it wasn't meant to be my house. Good luck to you, me, and all the other house hunters!
posted by poppunkcat at 9:01 AM on April 1, 2021 [1 favorite]
I am also in a hot market, and figure if somebody else gets a house that I wanted, then it wasn't meant to be my house. Good luck to you, me, and all the other house hunters!
posted by poppunkcat at 9:01 AM on April 1, 2021 [1 favorite]
But I haven't even seen a single house in person yet!
But you've been in many houses over the course of your life, yes? Like others are saying, trust yourself to be able to recognize when a house is for you. But definitely make sure you fall in love with the 3D version of the house, not just the photos.
posted by coffeecat at 9:12 AM on April 1, 2021 [5 favorites]
But you've been in many houses over the course of your life, yes? Like others are saying, trust yourself to be able to recognize when a house is for you. But definitely make sure you fall in love with the 3D version of the house, not just the photos.
posted by coffeecat at 9:12 AM on April 1, 2021 [5 favorites]
"you should really tour more than one house to see what you don't like, even if they are not in your price range or exact desired area"
I (a hopefully soon-to-be first time homebuyer) actually saw advice recently that you should intentionally tour houses you aren't interested in when you first start the process so that you'll be prepared when you actually do find a house you like.
posted by kevinbelt at 9:25 AM on April 1, 2021 [7 favorites]
I (a hopefully soon-to-be first time homebuyer) actually saw advice recently that you should intentionally tour houses you aren't interested in when you first start the process so that you'll be prepared when you actually do find a house you like.
posted by kevinbelt at 9:25 AM on April 1, 2021 [7 favorites]
If you love it in person, go ahead and make an offer contingent on home inspection. If your offer is accepted, go ahead and take it. You've got a good story! Sometimes improbable things like this happen.
Your offer may not be accepted. If that happens, you'll need to be ready to cheerfully move on and not feel like the One True Perfect House slipped away. In fact, try to completely remove "perfect house" from your brain as a concept. It just adds stress to an already-stressful decision. All houses have pros and cons, and the most perfect house will still manage to piss you off at some point.
If you DON'T love it in person even if you were sure that you would, that is also totally okay.
posted by desuetude at 9:32 AM on April 1, 2021 [3 favorites]
Your offer may not be accepted. If that happens, you'll need to be ready to cheerfully move on and not feel like the One True Perfect House slipped away. In fact, try to completely remove "perfect house" from your brain as a concept. It just adds stress to an already-stressful decision. All houses have pros and cons, and the most perfect house will still manage to piss you off at some point.
If you DON'T love it in person even if you were sure that you would, that is also totally okay.
posted by desuetude at 9:32 AM on April 1, 2021 [3 favorites]
Absolutely tour the house in person and also, if you're not familiar with that exact neighbourhood, walk around the neighbourhood. I wish I had also taken transit from my current home but still happy with it.
If you're worried about not seeing enough, call your agent now and see if you can book a tour for anything nearby even if it's not for you (maybe not too over your price range.)
My first house was a complete fixer upper DIY disaster of a house and I loved it.* We sold it for food reasons and our family would never fit in it now and I still think about the sun and light in the house and the feel of the house and I miss it. I truly believe you can feel houses. I toured houses that had all the same characteristics but did not feel right/have the right light/etc.
I think you will know. But yes, make sure you poke in the closets and have a look at the basement and everything else.
The house I'm in now, I did not love on our first tour and in fact, it sold. Then I regretted it mostly because of the location, and then that deal fell through and their agent called our agent just as we were bidding on a different house and voila! I will admit that I don't love it with the same quirky passion as my first disaster house, but now, 15 years later, I love it because it does work, it's not too big and not too small and the spaces work and...it's home. Lesson: it will be okay.
* Money pit + all our time off for 7 years, don't recommend that part of it.
posted by warriorqueen at 9:37 AM on April 1, 2021 [1 favorite]
If you're worried about not seeing enough, call your agent now and see if you can book a tour for anything nearby even if it's not for you (maybe not too over your price range.)
My first house was a complete fixer upper DIY disaster of a house and I loved it.* We sold it for food reasons and our family would never fit in it now and I still think about the sun and light in the house and the feel of the house and I miss it. I truly believe you can feel houses. I toured houses that had all the same characteristics but did not feel right/have the right light/etc.
I think you will know. But yes, make sure you poke in the closets and have a look at the basement and everything else.
The house I'm in now, I did not love on our first tour and in fact, it sold. Then I regretted it mostly because of the location, and then that deal fell through and their agent called our agent just as we were bidding on a different house and voila! I will admit that I don't love it with the same quirky passion as my first disaster house, but now, 15 years later, I love it because it does work, it's not too big and not too small and the spaces work and...it's home. Lesson: it will be okay.
* Money pit + all our time off for 7 years, don't recommend that part of it.
posted by warriorqueen at 9:37 AM on April 1, 2021 [1 favorite]
Oh, and go ahead and schedule some appointments to see a couple of other houses ASAP. Like, tomorrow, or even tonight.
If you love this house and put in an offer immediately, seeing other houses will give you something to do with yourself while you wait to hear back. If you're accepted, having seen other houses will let you shush your well-meaning friends and family about whether it's weird to be one-and-done. If your offer is NOT accepted, you'll have a head start towards moving on.
posted by desuetude at 9:38 AM on April 1, 2021
If you love this house and put in an offer immediately, seeing other houses will give you something to do with yourself while you wait to hear back. If you're accepted, having seen other houses will let you shush your well-meaning friends and family about whether it's weird to be one-and-done. If your offer is NOT accepted, you'll have a head start towards moving on.
posted by desuetude at 9:38 AM on April 1, 2021
Response by poster: Honestly, I am still kicking myself over not having the chance to see a house that looked perfect... I couldn't see it this weekend and now it's under contract. I have had literal nightmares about it this week, because I am a nut. But c'est la vie.
Turns out that the listing broker said the earliest we can see the house is Saturday, so I will hopefully be seeing a couple other houses (same general area/neighborhood) tonight.
This house is under budget for me, thankfully, so that's nice. My mom and boyfriend say it looks too small from the listing, but I dunno... have to see it in person before I decide.
I just want the confidence to say either "yes!" or "no!" to a house quickly, because I know that once I decide, things will have to move very fast. My first impressions tend to be way too positive all the time, so I want to be able to check myself and see if this REALLY seems like the right house or if I just think so because I love everything at first and take a while to see drawbacks.
posted by nowadays at 9:39 AM on April 1, 2021 [2 favorites]
Turns out that the listing broker said the earliest we can see the house is Saturday, so I will hopefully be seeing a couple other houses (same general area/neighborhood) tonight.
This house is under budget for me, thankfully, so that's nice. My mom and boyfriend say it looks too small from the listing, but I dunno... have to see it in person before I decide.
I just want the confidence to say either "yes!" or "no!" to a house quickly, because I know that once I decide, things will have to move very fast. My first impressions tend to be way too positive all the time, so I want to be able to check myself and see if this REALLY seems like the right house or if I just think so because I love everything at first and take a while to see drawbacks.
posted by nowadays at 9:39 AM on April 1, 2021 [2 favorites]
I say this whenever home-buying questions come up, but that's because it cost me quite a bit of money to learn and I hope to save you from that: "home inspector" is not a regulated profession in my area, nor I suspect it is in yours, so any jackass can hang out a shingle and say they inspect homes. As well, of the homeowner gets the inspection done and then gives it to you, there's no contractual relationship between you and the inspector, so you have no recourse if they missed something, regardless of how much it costs you to fix.
posted by mhoye at 9:39 AM on April 1, 2021 [4 favorites]
posted by mhoye at 9:39 AM on April 1, 2021 [4 favorites]
We bought the first house we made an offer on and the second house we looked at together. (I saw one additional house alone). We saw it Friday and had our offer accepted the next Wednesday. A couple things helped with being confident and moving quickly:
- we had lived in the same neighborhood as the house for 5 years and knew we liked it, good commutes, etc.
- we had a very good understanding of our must-haves, nice-to-haves, and deal breakers. We thought about it like mskye recommends. E.g. one of our must haves was a large lot, and one of our deal breakers was structural work to make the flow/layout acceptable.
- I had been obsessively looking at houses on Redfin for about two years before we bought so I had a really solid understanding of the local market and specifically how common/rare houses that checked our boxes were. This let us be really clear when this house came on the market that we should pursue it aggressively
- we were clear about our budget and highest price, which helped us win the escalation in a multiple-offers scenario
We also consciously limited our risk:
-it was a hot neighborhood so we knew we could sell if it wasn't right for us and at least break even after costs.
- we waived all contingencies which helped us win the bid. However were comfortable doing so because we bought well below our max budget, and got it inspected pre-offer so we would have confidence that it was in acceptable structural condition.
So far it's been perfect for us, the downsides are all things we knew about and accepted, and the upsides are all there. And I'm really grateful to have avoided the heartache, stress, and time cost of pursuing 10-12 properties before having an accepted offer, like some of our friends have.
posted by foodmapper at 11:05 AM on April 1, 2021 [6 favorites]
- we had lived in the same neighborhood as the house for 5 years and knew we liked it, good commutes, etc.
- we had a very good understanding of our must-haves, nice-to-haves, and deal breakers. We thought about it like mskye recommends. E.g. one of our must haves was a large lot, and one of our deal breakers was structural work to make the flow/layout acceptable.
- I had been obsessively looking at houses on Redfin for about two years before we bought so I had a really solid understanding of the local market and specifically how common/rare houses that checked our boxes were. This let us be really clear when this house came on the market that we should pursue it aggressively
- we were clear about our budget and highest price, which helped us win the escalation in a multiple-offers scenario
We also consciously limited our risk:
-it was a hot neighborhood so we knew we could sell if it wasn't right for us and at least break even after costs.
- we waived all contingencies which helped us win the bid. However were comfortable doing so because we bought well below our max budget, and got it inspected pre-offer so we would have confidence that it was in acceptable structural condition.
So far it's been perfect for us, the downsides are all things we knew about and accepted, and the upsides are all there. And I'm really grateful to have avoided the heartache, stress, and time cost of pursuing 10-12 properties before having an accepted offer, like some of our friends have.
posted by foodmapper at 11:05 AM on April 1, 2021 [6 favorites]
In a previous life, I was a Realtor. You just know! But if it doesn't work out ... trust me, it wasn't meant to be. (This has happened to me with a home I moved heaven and earth to get ... didn't happen and months later it turned out the neighbors were AWFUL and untouchable.)
Please let us know!
posted by cyndigo at 5:10 PM on April 1, 2021 [1 favorite]
Please let us know!
posted by cyndigo at 5:10 PM on April 1, 2021 [1 favorite]
FWIW, I bought the only house I toured (I drove by many and that was enough to put me off them). My agent tried a little to talk me out of it. I don’t think a perfect house exists, but I feel like I made a solid choice and I like it more the longer I settle in. If you think you’d like coming home to a house and the finances / inspection work out, go for it!
Home inspectors are regulated in my state, but I kinda wish I’d picked my own vs. going with the one my agent chose. He was fine, but a bit sanguine about some of the repairs.
posted by momus_window at 7:21 PM on April 1, 2021
Home inspectors are regulated in my state, but I kinda wish I’d picked my own vs. going with the one my agent chose. He was fine, but a bit sanguine about some of the repairs.
posted by momus_window at 7:21 PM on April 1, 2021
Yeah about inspection, I know some houses sell on preference to buyers who waive inspection, but I just can't even. Contingent on inspection I hire or dtmfa. Maybe in some markets for some construction you can roll the dice, but I like older houses and I've seen some shit. And when I saw inspection-waiving going on it was not all sellers, YMMV though.
posted by away for regrooving at 12:30 AM on April 2, 2021
posted by away for regrooving at 12:30 AM on April 2, 2021
Response by poster: Well, I saw another couple houses last night, really liked one and considered putting in an offer... only to discover that while we were actually in that house, the owner accepted a contract from someone else!
It's a blessing in disguise -- after speaking to some locals, I've decided to focus on another part of town for my search anyway. Onto some more showings tomorrow!
I've got a better idea in my head now of what I'm looking for in a home, and based on what's been sold in the last few months in that part of town, I think I know what to hold out for and what to jump on... hopefully, anyway!
posted by nowadays at 10:40 AM on April 2, 2021 [2 favorites]
It's a blessing in disguise -- after speaking to some locals, I've decided to focus on another part of town for my search anyway. Onto some more showings tomorrow!
I've got a better idea in my head now of what I'm looking for in a home, and based on what's been sold in the last few months in that part of town, I think I know what to hold out for and what to jump on... hopefully, anyway!
posted by nowadays at 10:40 AM on April 2, 2021 [2 favorites]
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posted by pinochiette at 8:26 AM on April 1, 2021 [21 favorites]