How to get over trauma of previous birth?
June 3, 2019 1:35 AM Subscribe
I need to process the trauma from my last birth and quickly.
I'm pregnant and due in about a month. I have a teenager from a previous relationship. In the past few weeks as we've been attending various hospital tours, birthing classes, being asked to make a birth plan, etc., I've realized that I did nothing to deal with the trauma of my first child's birth. And now I'm really scared about this forthcoming one. First child's birth included: 2 painful failed epidurals so birth was an unexpectedly unmedicated c-section, not a great support team from family or professionals, a natural disaster in our city that closed other hospitals and reduced staff and resources substantially (3 women giving birth in rooms meant for 1), baby ended up in NICU for a few weeks, NICU doctors accused me of having done things to cause baby's health issues... It goes on and on. Every time in birth class that they say 'X rarely happens' I think 'except to me.'
This time will be better - bigger city, the hospital is way more patient-centric, we've hired a doula, I have a better OB, a better partner, the option to do nitrous oxcide...
But I'm still having small panic attacks during much of the content of these birthing classes and the thought of delivering again. I didn't do any sort of therapy for the previous trauma cuz new baby, etc.
Ideas for how to work through this quickly? I only have a month and I'm working without breaks all day, every day until I'm due (to pay for that doula). I just don't know how I could find a therapist and when I would see them. Is there magical therapy or at-home work for this? And yes, I've already hinted at these issues with my OB and doula and will bring them up more firmly with the doula soon.
I'm pregnant and due in about a month. I have a teenager from a previous relationship. In the past few weeks as we've been attending various hospital tours, birthing classes, being asked to make a birth plan, etc., I've realized that I did nothing to deal with the trauma of my first child's birth. And now I'm really scared about this forthcoming one. First child's birth included: 2 painful failed epidurals so birth was an unexpectedly unmedicated c-section, not a great support team from family or professionals, a natural disaster in our city that closed other hospitals and reduced staff and resources substantially (3 women giving birth in rooms meant for 1), baby ended up in NICU for a few weeks, NICU doctors accused me of having done things to cause baby's health issues... It goes on and on. Every time in birth class that they say 'X rarely happens' I think 'except to me.'
This time will be better - bigger city, the hospital is way more patient-centric, we've hired a doula, I have a better OB, a better partner, the option to do nitrous oxcide...
But I'm still having small panic attacks during much of the content of these birthing classes and the thought of delivering again. I didn't do any sort of therapy for the previous trauma cuz new baby, etc.
Ideas for how to work through this quickly? I only have a month and I'm working without breaks all day, every day until I'm due (to pay for that doula). I just don't know how I could find a therapist and when I would see them. Is there magical therapy or at-home work for this? And yes, I've already hinted at these issues with my OB and doula and will bring them up more firmly with the doula soon.
Do you knit or crochet? I've found the way to deal with my anxiety involves distracting myself by taking on projects, obviously at your stage, nothing too physical. I do cooking projects, craft stuff, tending my house plants, etc.
A friend of mine once gave me a worry stone, which I found very helpful in times of need.
I also learned how to breathe using my diaphragm, like this.
For me, when I think of past events that have caused me anxiety and trauma, the best thing is to write it out for 10-15 minutes in a blank document or draft email, and then close it and let it go. If I focus too much on it, I get into an endless loop and it doesn't go away.
I think talking to your doula and partner about it can be good, for validation, and I know you realize things are different this time, and 2nd births are often much easier, take advantage of all of your support people and lean on them, that's what they are there for.
posted by Marie Mon Dieu at 3:11 AM on June 3, 2019
A friend of mine once gave me a worry stone, which I found very helpful in times of need.
I also learned how to breathe using my diaphragm, like this.
For me, when I think of past events that have caused me anxiety and trauma, the best thing is to write it out for 10-15 minutes in a blank document or draft email, and then close it and let it go. If I focus too much on it, I get into an endless loop and it doesn't go away.
I think talking to your doula and partner about it can be good, for validation, and I know you realize things are different this time, and 2nd births are often much easier, take advantage of all of your support people and lean on them, that's what they are there for.
posted by Marie Mon Dieu at 3:11 AM on June 3, 2019
I lost my first child after a traumatic birth, NICU stay, etc. I had definitely not processed that trauma by my second delivery. It was still okay, in that I had my son. I did panic full-out at one point, and...he still made it out fine. It sucked, but it turns out even though my reptilian brain stem was super like “fire burns! Don’t touch fire!,” labour was just...labour. Sucky, finite, produced child.
So I’m really sorry you’re going through this. It may be more about managing where you actually are than fixing it in one month.. Definitely tell your actual labour team at the hospital while in labour exactly what you said here. I received compassionate, thoughtful care at that time. It helped a lot.
Where it really impacted me was post-partum. My OB had put me in a high-risk screening program for PPD which was helpful. But I had a year of anxiety. In hindsight I wish I had sought help then. So rather than focusing solely on your doula, etc., it might be good to line up some ongoing therapy for then (babe-I’m-arms friendly).
posted by warriorqueen at 3:33 AM on June 3, 2019 [13 favorites]
So I’m really sorry you’re going through this. It may be more about managing where you actually are than fixing it in one month.. Definitely tell your actual labour team at the hospital while in labour exactly what you said here. I received compassionate, thoughtful care at that time. It helped a lot.
Where it really impacted me was post-partum. My OB had put me in a high-risk screening program for PPD which was helpful. But I had a year of anxiety. In hindsight I wish I had sought help then. So rather than focusing solely on your doula, etc., it might be good to line up some ongoing therapy for then (babe-I’m-arms friendly).
posted by warriorqueen at 3:33 AM on June 3, 2019 [13 favorites]
The hospital we're having our second at has someone on staff full-time to help talk through things like this, a kind of birth trauma counselor. This is actually one of the reasons why my wife chose the gynecologist she did when we moved, so that she could eventually give birth at this hospital. Check with your hospital to see if they offer anything similar. If not, I agree that you should ask your doula. They should be able to find someone for you, and may even be able to help you themselves.
posted by kevinbelt at 3:41 AM on June 3, 2019 [1 favorite]
posted by kevinbelt at 3:41 AM on June 3, 2019 [1 favorite]
It's fairly late in the day but hypnotherapy helped me immensely in this situation. I saw someone privately but I know that there are some good books/CDs out there. I have friends who found hypnotherapy incredibly helpful during the birthing process, but for me the main benefit was in the leadup to the birth. It also gave me something practical to do to prepare, rather than just stressing about it.
posted by rubbish bin night at 4:41 AM on June 3, 2019 [2 favorites]
posted by rubbish bin night at 4:41 AM on June 3, 2019 [2 favorites]
I heard good things about this HypnoBirthing book; YMMV. I wish you the best of luck.
posted by rubbish bin night at 4:46 AM on June 3, 2019 [1 favorite]
posted by rubbish bin night at 4:46 AM on June 3, 2019 [1 favorite]
It’s been proven that naming fears makes them more manageable.
I would set a timer for 10 minutes and write down every one of your fears, down one side of a sheet of paper. Be really specific: so not “epidural” but “I’m afraid the epidural needle will miss a spot and cause pain.”
If the timer runs out before you’re done, set it for 10 more... the point is just to keep you focussed and brief rather than feeling like you’re slogging through your past. But take as long as it takes. You can do just the birth, or the birth and postpartum month too if that’s something you’re concerned about.
When the list feels done, go back and put a number beside the main fears - you don’t have to rank all of them but indicate your top five or ten.
Then go do something to clear your head a little, like a walk or wash your hair (having water run over your head can really help reset your emotions).
In a day or so, set aside 1-3 hours and sit down with your birthing partner or doula and talk through the list.
Coach them to ask you “and then what?” Or “what can we do?”. You need to have a pen handy, and they should take notes too, in a document called “proactive birthing”
“I’m really afraid the epidural needle will miss, causing bad pain.”
“And then what?”
“It will really hurt.”
“And then what?”
“Well... I might have a panic attack.”
“What can we do?”
“We can tell the doctor ahead of time that I have a hard spine so only an experienced person can place the needle, not a resident.”
Once you find a solution, your job is to hand write this down on your list of fears beside epidural (writing is programming your brain!) and your partner types it onto the proactive list.
“What else can we do?”
“Well if I am panicking, it would help if you lie beside me and hug me. And last time the doctor said “calm down” a lot and that’s NOT helpful, I would rather be told “you have this”. >> you write, and they type, this as well.
“What else can we do?”
“... I think that’s all I got for now.”
“Ok, what’s the next fear on the list.”
Go through the whole list this way. By the end hopefully you will have named and elaborated on all your fears, which de-fangs them somewhat, and come up with a list of proactive and reassuring plans for what you and your birth team can do to help manage the odds and cope if any of your concerns comes to pass.
Take another break of a day or so, and use the same template to deal with any more concerns that come up.
Then go back into the Proactive document and sort the items according to timeline and actor:
A list of things you can do before, during, and after birth
A list for your doula
A list for your doctor
A list for your partner.
Finesse the language for the other people so it’s positive and actionable: not “don’t tell me to calm down” but “for me, encouraging and positive affirmation works better than negative direction, so instead of “calm down” I would prefer “you’re doing amazing”.
Then bring the lists to each person and talk through them together. I would do the most receptive person first and the most combative or defensive person last. This is about your needs, not theirs, so be really clear. And since you’ve made the language actionable it hopefully won’t trigger too much defensiveness, as this is about the future, not the past.
Other things:
Avoid bad birth stories.
When anyone starts telling up about their difficult birth, gently interrupt them and say “I have some worries about my own upcoming birth so I’m really trying to only think positively about birth right now!” Or just go to the washroom to escape them. Many people have had hard births and need to process the experience... that’s on them, not you. If you’re going to a party enlist a friend to help you evade those convos. If you’re stuck and can’t get out, place one hand on the baby’s ears (like touch your belly where their head is), and one hand over your heart, and think to yourself and the baby, “this isn’t our story”.
Find affirmations! Search Pinterest for birthing affirmations that feel right and print them out. Stick them around the house in surprising places (dishes cabinet! Bathroom drawer! Shower!) and say them out loud as you see them.
“My body is healthy and knows what to do”
“My baby moves smoothly though my body”
“I can manage the sensations my body feels”
“My labour is like ocean waves passing over me”
“I am ready to meet my beautiful baby”
Listen to affirmation tracks. Search “Hypnobirth” to find great affirmations.
Consider watching videos of lovely hypnobirths. Google “hypnobirth” with keywords like “calm” or “gentle” to find them. Hypnobirth really changes the cultural paradigm we’re presented with about what a birth can look like.
Birth is not an illness and it doesn’t have to be an ordeal... it can be a primal, empowering, and beautiful experience. I wish you and your baby a gentle, strong, and magical birth!
posted by nouvelle-personne at 4:55 AM on June 3, 2019 [15 favorites]
I would set a timer for 10 minutes and write down every one of your fears, down one side of a sheet of paper. Be really specific: so not “epidural” but “I’m afraid the epidural needle will miss a spot and cause pain.”
If the timer runs out before you’re done, set it for 10 more... the point is just to keep you focussed and brief rather than feeling like you’re slogging through your past. But take as long as it takes. You can do just the birth, or the birth and postpartum month too if that’s something you’re concerned about.
When the list feels done, go back and put a number beside the main fears - you don’t have to rank all of them but indicate your top five or ten.
Then go do something to clear your head a little, like a walk or wash your hair (having water run over your head can really help reset your emotions).
In a day or so, set aside 1-3 hours and sit down with your birthing partner or doula and talk through the list.
Coach them to ask you “and then what?” Or “what can we do?”. You need to have a pen handy, and they should take notes too, in a document called “proactive birthing”
“I’m really afraid the epidural needle will miss, causing bad pain.”
“And then what?”
“It will really hurt.”
“And then what?”
“Well... I might have a panic attack.”
“What can we do?”
“We can tell the doctor ahead of time that I have a hard spine so only an experienced person can place the needle, not a resident.”
Once you find a solution, your job is to hand write this down on your list of fears beside epidural (writing is programming your brain!) and your partner types it onto the proactive list.
“What else can we do?”
“Well if I am panicking, it would help if you lie beside me and hug me. And last time the doctor said “calm down” a lot and that’s NOT helpful, I would rather be told “you have this”. >> you write, and they type, this as well.
“What else can we do?”
“... I think that’s all I got for now.”
“Ok, what’s the next fear on the list.”
Go through the whole list this way. By the end hopefully you will have named and elaborated on all your fears, which de-fangs them somewhat, and come up with a list of proactive and reassuring plans for what you and your birth team can do to help manage the odds and cope if any of your concerns comes to pass.
Take another break of a day or so, and use the same template to deal with any more concerns that come up.
Then go back into the Proactive document and sort the items according to timeline and actor:
A list of things you can do before, during, and after birth
A list for your doula
A list for your doctor
A list for your partner.
Finesse the language for the other people so it’s positive and actionable: not “don’t tell me to calm down” but “for me, encouraging and positive affirmation works better than negative direction, so instead of “calm down” I would prefer “you’re doing amazing”.
Then bring the lists to each person and talk through them together. I would do the most receptive person first and the most combative or defensive person last. This is about your needs, not theirs, so be really clear. And since you’ve made the language actionable it hopefully won’t trigger too much defensiveness, as this is about the future, not the past.
Other things:
Avoid bad birth stories.
When anyone starts telling up about their difficult birth, gently interrupt them and say “I have some worries about my own upcoming birth so I’m really trying to only think positively about birth right now!” Or just go to the washroom to escape them. Many people have had hard births and need to process the experience... that’s on them, not you. If you’re going to a party enlist a friend to help you evade those convos. If you’re stuck and can’t get out, place one hand on the baby’s ears (like touch your belly where their head is), and one hand over your heart, and think to yourself and the baby, “this isn’t our story”.
Find affirmations! Search Pinterest for birthing affirmations that feel right and print them out. Stick them around the house in surprising places (dishes cabinet! Bathroom drawer! Shower!) and say them out loud as you see them.
“My body is healthy and knows what to do”
“My baby moves smoothly though my body”
“I can manage the sensations my body feels”
“My labour is like ocean waves passing over me”
“I am ready to meet my beautiful baby”
Listen to affirmation tracks. Search “Hypnobirth” to find great affirmations.
Consider watching videos of lovely hypnobirths. Google “hypnobirth” with keywords like “calm” or “gentle” to find them. Hypnobirth really changes the cultural paradigm we’re presented with about what a birth can look like.
Birth is not an illness and it doesn’t have to be an ordeal... it can be a primal, empowering, and beautiful experience. I wish you and your baby a gentle, strong, and magical birth!
posted by nouvelle-personne at 4:55 AM on June 3, 2019 [15 favorites]
“My body is healthy and knows what to do”
“My baby moves smoothly though my body”
Everyone is different but for me, having been through a traumatic delivery, this was incredibly negating. Don’t be shy about telling your birth team if that is true for you.
posted by warriorqueen at 5:27 AM on June 3, 2019 [19 favorites]
“My baby moves smoothly though my body”
Everyone is different but for me, having been through a traumatic delivery, this was incredibly negating. Don’t be shy about telling your birth team if that is true for you.
posted by warriorqueen at 5:27 AM on June 3, 2019 [19 favorites]
First of all, I'm so sorry you had such a traumatic experience. That is really hard.
To follow up on many of the great advice above, I just wanted to say that you do have the option of skipping these birth classes. If they are triggering, then it might not be helpful for you to be there. You have a good support team, by the sounds of it, and can find much of the facts you need elsewhere (from your medical team, books, the internet, your own prior experience, etc)
In the US these classes tend to be quite polarized. They are either all hippy dippy, telling you you're a goddess and nothing ever goes wrong and doctors are all evil and in the pockets of Big Pharma; or they go the other extreme and insist that you over medicalize everything.
It might be that you need to find your peace somewhere in the middle: knowing that yes, sometimes things go terribly badly, but also that, if that happens, there will be professionals around who will be there to help you (and people to advocate for you, which you didn't have last time.)
You had a really traumatic experience, so it's not going to be helpful for you to be around people who basically negate that, which it sounds like this class is doing.
But this time you are going to have the best of both worlds: medical help if and when you need it, and a kind supporting team ready to ensure the medical team are sensitive to your needs.
Best of luck to you.
posted by EllaEm at 7:13 AM on June 3, 2019
To follow up on many of the great advice above, I just wanted to say that you do have the option of skipping these birth classes. If they are triggering, then it might not be helpful for you to be there. You have a good support team, by the sounds of it, and can find much of the facts you need elsewhere (from your medical team, books, the internet, your own prior experience, etc)
In the US these classes tend to be quite polarized. They are either all hippy dippy, telling you you're a goddess and nothing ever goes wrong and doctors are all evil and in the pockets of Big Pharma; or they go the other extreme and insist that you over medicalize everything.
It might be that you need to find your peace somewhere in the middle: knowing that yes, sometimes things go terribly badly, but also that, if that happens, there will be professionals around who will be there to help you (and people to advocate for you, which you didn't have last time.)
You had a really traumatic experience, so it's not going to be helpful for you to be around people who basically negate that, which it sounds like this class is doing.
But this time you are going to have the best of both worlds: medical help if and when you need it, and a kind supporting team ready to ensure the medical team are sensitive to your needs.
Best of luck to you.
posted by EllaEm at 7:13 AM on June 3, 2019
"Is there magical therapy or at-home work for this?"
If you're in the US, Doctor on Demand provides therapy via videochat and on demand. At any time it's convenient for you, even at 2 a.m. You can make appointments and see the same therapist a few times or just play therapist roulette at convenient moments for you. A lot of insurance plans cover it (it's suuuuuuuper cheap for them compared to an office visit), but even paying full price out of pocket isn't too bad. Check your insurance and see if they cover that or a similar telemedicine provider. (I've used Doctor on Demand, though, and can say it usually works really well. I've even used it at midnight when I realized I was super-sick and would be too sick in the morning to drive to the doctor!)
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 7:28 AM on June 3, 2019 [2 favorites]
If you're in the US, Doctor on Demand provides therapy via videochat and on demand. At any time it's convenient for you, even at 2 a.m. You can make appointments and see the same therapist a few times or just play therapist roulette at convenient moments for you. A lot of insurance plans cover it (it's suuuuuuuper cheap for them compared to an office visit), but even paying full price out of pocket isn't too bad. Check your insurance and see if they cover that or a similar telemedicine provider. (I've used Doctor on Demand, though, and can say it usually works really well. I've even used it at midnight when I realized I was super-sick and would be too sick in the morning to drive to the doctor!)
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 7:28 AM on June 3, 2019 [2 favorites]
You may be able to find someone who does EMDR therapy in off-hours, since you are in a major city. You could get relief (temporary or better) from PTSD with EMDR in a burst of frequent sessions. It's not a guarantee but it is possible. It's worth paying out of pocket (putting it on a credit card) and going for reimbursement later if time is of the essence.
posted by juniperesque at 8:09 AM on June 3, 2019
posted by juniperesque at 8:09 AM on June 3, 2019
If you can find a provider who does prolonged exposure or cognitive processing therapy and is willing to do multiple sessions a week, that could be an option. Both of these treatments result in a loss of diagnosis of PTSD or more than 50% symptom reduction for most patients with PTSD after about 12 sessions.
Because the eye movements/lateral tapping from EMDR are nearly unanimously considered in the PTSD research field to be a placebo that is added to the active ingredient from prolonged exposure (i.e., focusing for an extended period of time on memories of the trauma), I'm usually cautious about referring people to it because a lot of providers will tell the patients to stop talking/thinking about the trauma and focus on the eye movements when they feel upset, which will make the treatment ineffective.
I wish you the best of luck. Please feel free to memail me if you need help finding a referral.
posted by quiet coyote at 8:48 AM on June 3, 2019 [1 favorite]
Because the eye movements/lateral tapping from EMDR are nearly unanimously considered in the PTSD research field to be a placebo that is added to the active ingredient from prolonged exposure (i.e., focusing for an extended period of time on memories of the trauma), I'm usually cautious about referring people to it because a lot of providers will tell the patients to stop talking/thinking about the trauma and focus on the eye movements when they feel upset, which will make the treatment ineffective.
I wish you the best of luck. Please feel free to memail me if you need help finding a referral.
posted by quiet coyote at 8:48 AM on June 3, 2019 [1 favorite]
Ah! So I found my medical team was amazing once I said the magic words in the delivery room, which were apparently, “I had a really difficult first delivery and now I’m freaking out!!!!! Aaaarghlblarghahahahah!!!”
Everyone started talking at once, the phrase “traumatic birth” was repeated a LOT, and then everyone was 10x nicer. And they even gave me the fentanyl epidural, not the regular one.
Which is a long way of saying that, at a good hospital, even without any preparation, they will know how to treat women who have had a traumatic previous birth. Just make sure they know to put you in that category. Probably by yelling that fact at people as necessary.
posted by whitewall at 8:56 AM on June 3, 2019 [5 favorites]
Everyone started talking at once, the phrase “traumatic birth” was repeated a LOT, and then everyone was 10x nicer. And they even gave me the fentanyl epidural, not the regular one.
Which is a long way of saying that, at a good hospital, even without any preparation, they will know how to treat women who have had a traumatic previous birth. Just make sure they know to put you in that category. Probably by yelling that fact at people as necessary.
posted by whitewall at 8:56 AM on June 3, 2019 [5 favorites]
I had a traumatic birth and found a wonderful therapist by just googling "traumatic birth therapist $CITY". We only met a few times, and she did EFT and EMDR, both of which worked way way faster than talk therapy would have.
Good luck to you. You've been through a lot and I hope your next birth is everything you hope it will be.
posted by peanut_mcgillicuty at 12:08 PM on June 3, 2019
Good luck to you. You've been through a lot and I hope your next birth is everything you hope it will be.
posted by peanut_mcgillicuty at 12:08 PM on June 3, 2019
In the chance that you aren't able to find a therapist that you can do a few sessions with in that time, you can also work on really taking care of your nervous system (the system of our bodies that gives us the fight-flight-freeze or collapse-shutdown response when the system is overwhelmed by a challenging event/stressor.) You can learn to re-regulate your nervous system and then change your state of arousal when you identify that you're going into a dysregulated state such as fight-flight, through use of breathing techniques, somatic techniques, sensory inputs like squeezing your arms and legs, and naming your feelings and body sensations out loud as this helps your brain make sense of the information and regulate.
A therapeutic exercise you can do by yourself or with another trusted human is the Felt Sense exercise:
"How to Locate Your Felt Sense"
You can use this to get closer to uncomfortable/overwhelming feelings so that you can safely move through them with use of visualization and naming.
A great exercise to regulate your nervous system is The 5 Step Self-Holding Exercise. I use this one all the time to bring myself back into regulation.
If you look at your responses to the idea of giving birth, and you notice that your heart beats faster, your head pounds, you feel jittery or angry or sweaty, that's your fight-flight response, and if you feel shut down, silent, hard to form words, cloudy, hazy, numb, that is your collapse response. Do everything you can to 1) make yourself feel safe emotionally and physically, 2) ground yourself in your body and in your environment, and 3) make sure you're breathing evenly.
This is also a great short video on changing the position of the body to shift our inner sensations of terror - this one requires you to put in an email address but it's really worth it to me.
The body position of joy and openness
Take care of yourself and your nervous system! Be well and best of luck with your labor and delivery.
posted by fairlynearlyready at 2:51 PM on June 3, 2019 [3 favorites]
A therapeutic exercise you can do by yourself or with another trusted human is the Felt Sense exercise:
"How to Locate Your Felt Sense"
You can use this to get closer to uncomfortable/overwhelming feelings so that you can safely move through them with use of visualization and naming.
A great exercise to regulate your nervous system is The 5 Step Self-Holding Exercise. I use this one all the time to bring myself back into regulation.
If you look at your responses to the idea of giving birth, and you notice that your heart beats faster, your head pounds, you feel jittery or angry or sweaty, that's your fight-flight response, and if you feel shut down, silent, hard to form words, cloudy, hazy, numb, that is your collapse response. Do everything you can to 1) make yourself feel safe emotionally and physically, 2) ground yourself in your body and in your environment, and 3) make sure you're breathing evenly.
This is also a great short video on changing the position of the body to shift our inner sensations of terror - this one requires you to put in an email address but it's really worth it to me.
The body position of joy and openness
Take care of yourself and your nervous system! Be well and best of luck with your labor and delivery.
posted by fairlynearlyready at 2:51 PM on June 3, 2019 [3 favorites]
You might find help through the Havening technique. It's a bit similar to EMDR. My family's midwife integrates it into her practice. My limited experience with it seems effective with very few (1-3) sessions. You might be able to find a practitioner through the Havening website.
posted by gaelenh at 10:05 PM on June 3, 2019
posted by gaelenh at 10:05 PM on June 3, 2019
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EMDR doesn't necessarily work through it the way talk therapy does, but you visualise what's stressing you out and do the eye movements, which for some reason help train your body to disconnect and not panic. Squeezing in a few appointments over the next few weeks could really help sort term.
posted by jrobin276 at 2:10 AM on June 3, 2019 [11 favorites]