Does my cat need a cat/dog?
May 11, 2017 4:52 PM Subscribe
Our cat lost her frenemy last month, who was the Best Cat in the World. BCW and remaining cat did a lot together. Remaining cat is a dominant young female who seems less stressed now that she's the only cat, but both more sedentary and bored. We've been attempting to work on both but wondering if she needs a cat/dog?
We're having a tough time considering getting another animal. BCW was literally the kindest, sweetest I've ever met in my life. Just thinking about losing him is making me cry. Remaining cat used to spend her days chasing BCW, observing him, getting chased by him, plotting various strategems related to BCW. They were the best of frenemies (from her perspective). BCW perceived her with tolerant amusement. Since his passage, she's actually seemed a lot more relaxed - she naps with her stomach exposed, she is more chatty with us (she is not a terribly people-oriented cat, but is very curious about what we do all day). But she seems a lot more bored and sedentary. We are lasering/nipping/walking/scratchering/balls/fish lures/birdfeeder/etc. and she plays a bit with them, but seems more interested in watching us run all over the room. We have started leash training and taking her outside, which is something she enjoys and is doing tolerably well at.
Not necessarily looking for toy suggestions (unless you have something outside of the norm, because we have everything that is standard).
She is a rescue from a "breeder" (aka mild hoarding situation) and grew up competing with all the other cats for attention. She handled getting introduced to BCW very poorly, and he tolerated months of her being pretty aggressive with him until she backed off. She has not previously lived with dogs, when we had a dog visit for a weekend she spent most of her weekend in her safe spaces (behind the dog gate and on her vertical perches, she's a tree cat).
Our big question is - should we considering getting her a cat/dog? I'm leaning to no because a) the crater BCW left is still smoldering b) she is a dominant cat who seems less stressed out as the solo cat in our household. But, we want to do the right thing for her and want her to be happy. We are not open to kittens/puppies, we are not open to adding more than one animal to our house (we can't be outnumbered). If you are encouraging us to consider adding an animal, specific suggestions about what ages to adopt and how to determine compatibility would be helpful.
We're having a tough time considering getting another animal. BCW was literally the kindest, sweetest I've ever met in my life. Just thinking about losing him is making me cry. Remaining cat used to spend her days chasing BCW, observing him, getting chased by him, plotting various strategems related to BCW. They were the best of frenemies (from her perspective). BCW perceived her with tolerant amusement. Since his passage, she's actually seemed a lot more relaxed - she naps with her stomach exposed, she is more chatty with us (she is not a terribly people-oriented cat, but is very curious about what we do all day). But she seems a lot more bored and sedentary. We are lasering/nipping/walking/scratchering/balls/fish lures/birdfeeder/etc. and she plays a bit with them, but seems more interested in watching us run all over the room. We have started leash training and taking her outside, which is something she enjoys and is doing tolerably well at.
Not necessarily looking for toy suggestions (unless you have something outside of the norm, because we have everything that is standard).
She is a rescue from a "breeder" (aka mild hoarding situation) and grew up competing with all the other cats for attention. She handled getting introduced to BCW very poorly, and he tolerated months of her being pretty aggressive with him until she backed off. She has not previously lived with dogs, when we had a dog visit for a weekend she spent most of her weekend in her safe spaces (behind the dog gate and on her vertical perches, she's a tree cat).
Our big question is - should we considering getting her a cat/dog? I'm leaning to no because a) the crater BCW left is still smoldering b) she is a dominant cat who seems less stressed out as the solo cat in our household. But, we want to do the right thing for her and want her to be happy. We are not open to kittens/puppies, we are not open to adding more than one animal to our house (we can't be outnumbered). If you are encouraging us to consider adding an animal, specific suggestions about what ages to adopt and how to determine compatibility would be helpful.
Cats _are_ social creatures. Feral cats congregate in colonies and enjoy spending time together; female cats will cooperate in raising kittens.
That said, you people might be society enough, provided you don't go on long trips or leave her alone a lot. Solo cats need lots of human interaction.
A dog might be nice for her, if it was calm and also delighted you. Worth a try, especially if you ever plan to travel (and would leave the dog at home with a visiting pet sitter instead of taking it with you or kenneling it).
OTOH, if she enjoyed spending time with the other cat, she might like another cat -- you could try fostering or trial adoption.
posted by amtho at 5:30 PM on May 11, 2017
That said, you people might be society enough, provided you don't go on long trips or leave her alone a lot. Solo cats need lots of human interaction.
A dog might be nice for her, if it was calm and also delighted you. Worth a try, especially if you ever plan to travel (and would leave the dog at home with a visiting pet sitter instead of taking it with you or kenneling it).
OTOH, if she enjoyed spending time with the other cat, she might like another cat -- you could try fostering or trial adoption.
posted by amtho at 5:30 PM on May 11, 2017
Is your cat showing signs of stress? Is she behaving differently, in such ways as:
--urinating/defecating outside the litter box, particularly on bedding or clothing. (Why bedding and clothing?--because he's trying to mingle his scent with yours)
--eating less, or not at all; or overeating
--overgrooming, to the point that they pull they hair out
--withdrawing/hiding, avoiding contact; or becoming clingy
You're looking for changes in baseline behavior indicative of stress. And if you do see changes, you'll then need to identify the cause of stress. One cause could be a medical problem, which means a trip to the vet to eliminate the somatic possibilities. Another cause could be separation anxiety, which, if it were the cause, would suggest that you should get another animal.
Does my cat need a cat/dog should be your second question. Your first question should be: does my cat have separation anxiety?
posted by BadgerDoctor at 6:58 PM on May 11, 2017 [1 favorite]
--urinating/defecating outside the litter box, particularly on bedding or clothing. (Why bedding and clothing?--because he's trying to mingle his scent with yours)
--eating less, or not at all; or overeating
--overgrooming, to the point that they pull they hair out
--withdrawing/hiding, avoiding contact; or becoming clingy
You're looking for changes in baseline behavior indicative of stress. And if you do see changes, you'll then need to identify the cause of stress. One cause could be a medical problem, which means a trip to the vet to eliminate the somatic possibilities. Another cause could be separation anxiety, which, if it were the cause, would suggest that you should get another animal.
Does my cat need a cat/dog should be your second question. Your first question should be: does my cat have separation anxiety?
posted by BadgerDoctor at 6:58 PM on May 11, 2017 [1 favorite]
Response by poster: No, she's significantly less stressed - she's lazy and happy, as I mentioned above the fold. We're monitoring her pretty closely.
posted by arnicae at 8:16 PM on May 11, 2017 [1 favorite]
posted by arnicae at 8:16 PM on May 11, 2017 [1 favorite]
We lost our mackerel tabby rescue in November and we got our partially socialized feral rescue two new kittens. They were of the opposite sex and we took our time introducing them. They snuggle with him, play fight with him, groom him, love him.
I would recommend cats having a playmate. We got two because we could adopt a bonded pair, the remaining cat is 13 and we don't want to leave a cat alone after he passes on. I was skeptical that such an old and grumpy cat would accept new kittens but he's taken to them like a duck in water.
posted by Talez at 8:13 AM on May 13, 2017
I would recommend cats having a playmate. We got two because we could adopt a bonded pair, the remaining cat is 13 and we don't want to leave a cat alone after he passes on. I was skeptical that such an old and grumpy cat would accept new kittens but he's taken to them like a duck in water.
posted by Talez at 8:13 AM on May 13, 2017
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by poppunkcat at 5:11 PM on May 11, 2017 [2 favorites]