I've got rid of all my clothes and I'm too busty to go naked
April 5, 2013 1:57 AM   Subscribe

Following a house move, a friend and I decluttered 70-90% of my wardrobe. I now feel like I have no idea what sort of thing I need to be buying in the future, particularly as I have a hard to fit figure. Help!

It was depressing on many levels - partly because I have gained weight in the past couple of years due to medication/contraception/stress, and partly because I've clearly wasted a lot of time and money on things that don't fit or suit. Many of it I;d been hanging onto in the hope of fitting into again, and I feel a bit like I'm resigning myself to being the size bigger that I am now - though the meds I take are such that I can arrest the process and start living/eating more healthily, but probably not change size easily.

Things that make clothes buying hard: I'm 5ft10, a UK16-18, and take a H-cup. I'm also an hourglass shape, which means that things that fit on the bust won't elsewhere, trousers in one size won't fasten and the next size up falls off my hips. Most high street ranges here stop at a 16, which means that I don't have the option of sizing up, and even then many shops here don't really cut for curves. I am also pale and red-headed which rules out quite a few colours. I sometimes feel like a different species next to other girls - too tall, too wide, too large-footed, too busty.

I like 50s style clothing, though my height and size rules out proper vintage (I have size US11 feet as well). I have a few vintage repro clothes, but I wonder if going for that look would feel more costumey. I work in a casual office so style is really up to me, but finding casual clothes that fit well is tricky. I wear a lot of jersey dresses as the stretch and shape is good on me, but my height and bust means that the 'waistband' hits at empire line, which manages to both hide my waist and emphasise the extra weight above it. Good for getting a seat on public transport, but not a good look.

I have some dressmaking skills but not enough to work with converting a pattern from a B-cup to a H, so at this stage I'm interested in things I can buy readymade from the shops. I have heard good things about an eBay store called TopRunway that does made-to-measure vintage-inspired clothing, but I'm not sure this is an everyday option, even if I fancy swanning around looking like Joan Holloway. I also like some of the styles on ModCloth, but given the cost of shipping, it's a gamble when it comes to the fit. I don't mind spending more for good quality - I'd like to find things that look ace and keep wearing them - but I don't have the funds to invest £££ per item, especially as I don't know if I will be this size forever.

So if you're a similar size - especially in terms of having a large bust - what kind of things do you wear?
posted by mippy to Clothing, Beauty, & Fashion (26 answers total) 16 users marked this as a favorite
 
I'm not a plus-sized hourglass-shaped woman (or even a woman) but I happen to be sitting next to a wardrobe stylist and here's the advice she's giving me:

-Low scoop-necks or v-necks—anything that makes a V towards the waist.
-3/4 length sleeves
-Fitted or tailored jackets with princess seams that accentuate your curves
-A-line trenches
-Tulip skirts or A-line knee-length skirts
-Boot cut or straight-leg jeans to balance out your hips
-Necklaces to draw a focal point upwards
-Thicker belts
posted by ferdinandcc at 2:28 AM on April 5, 2013 [10 favorites]


Do you follow any 'curvy' fashion blogs? Georgina at Fuller Figure Fuller Bust is a similar size and shape to you (although not as tall) and has a lot of clothing reviews on her website.

She's also very gorgeous and glamorous, and I know that a lot of readers find her very inspirational.
posted by RubyScarlet at 2:29 AM on April 5, 2013 [3 favorites]


I feel for you! I am similarly proportioned but 4 inches shorter and a size down (14/GG) and clothes shopping makes me hate the universe.

If I have a choice I veer more towards the forties than the 50's but generally I wear straight leg jeans, wide leg trousers, A-line knee length and longer pencil skirts, cap-sleeve shirts and knitted tops, long slouchy jumpers, the odd frock and lots of cardigans with calf length boots and flats. I shop at Next, Zara, Oasis and M&S, with forays into the upper size racks of a couple of boutique stores near where I live during the sales.

For work I usually try Next for tops, they often have structured knitwear/jersey affairs with 3/4 length or cap sleeves for about £15-20. 14s generally work for me and and they go up to 16/18. Zara and Oasis are also good for these styles but they do tend to stop at a 16, might be worth trying though.

I've been several times to Pepperberry on Oxford Circus - they cut for larger busts and I've sometimes done ok with dresses there, although the styles can be a bit frumpy.

Otherwise I'd recommend M&S (the horror!). They actually do quite a nice line in pseudo-retro cuts - all my pencil skirts, cardigans and cap-sleeved shirts are from there, they're usually much better quality than other high street clothes, easy to wash and wear (I avoid ironing at all costs) and are not expensive.

It really astonishes me that there aren't more options for hourglass women on the high street...there's a serious niche there!
posted by freya_lamb at 2:31 AM on April 5, 2013


Hourglass? Depending on your butt and legs situation, I feel like you need some stretchy patterned pencil skirts - bold stripes are good - and some kickass boots - to draw the eye down and balance out the bustiness. Belt in the waist with a plain top and a bra that fits (I know that's not so easy with an H). If you rock it, you'll rock it, ya dig?
posted by pink_gorilla at 2:31 AM on April 5, 2013


Oh my god, and also - dresses with a peplum. They can work magic.
posted by pink_gorilla at 2:32 AM on April 5, 2013


I was going to suggest eShakti which sells custom-sized clothing at surprisingly affordable prices, but unfortunately it appears that they only ship to the U.S. or Canada. Maybe you have friends/relatives in the U.S. who'd be willing to receive a package for you, or else look into parcel forwarding services? I'll throw it in anyway in case they expand their shipping options in the future.
posted by serelliya at 2:43 AM on April 5, 2013


Response by poster: I love FFFB. I am tempted to investigate Biu Biu on my recommendation. She is one stunning woman.

I was looking at Pepperberry a while ago. They would be perfect if I was working in a more corporate office, but the more casual stuff is a bit oldfashioned as you say.

Peplums - the thing with the height/bust means they usually hit a bit above the waist on me, which isn't ideal.

One of the dresses my friend (whose judgement I trust, and should be a wardrobe consultant full-time) said looked gorgeous on me was an M+S one. I find I can often go down a size there for some reason.

I should also have said that I'm 31 - I am also struggling with striking the right balance between quirky and juvenile, and grown-up and boring. I've already ruled out cartoony T-shirts from my future shopping trips.
posted by mippy at 3:08 AM on April 5, 2013


How about Boden? They go up to a size 22 and publish the exact measurements of all their clothes. Also, you can enter your body shape and they'll suggest items that might fit well. I haven't shopped there myself, but I've heard good things about them from people who want clothes that are stylish and well made for curvier people. Some of their stuff looks a bit vintage-inspired, but in a quite toned-down way.

Still, I wouldn't write off the whole 'swanning around like Joan Holloway' thing. Sounds pretty awesome to me.
posted by Acheman at 3:18 AM on April 5, 2013


Acheman: 'Swanning round like Joan Holloway' is not a lot of fun if you aren't comfortable drawing attention to the bits of you that other people tend to find sexy. Dressing curves can be a minefield.

Mippy: If you ever fancy shopping with someone who won't be dazzled by the va-va-voom let me know!
posted by freya_lamb at 4:19 AM on April 5, 2013


I am more hippy than busty, but ASOS Curve range has been very useful for things like trousers and things that aren't uber corporate or dowdy-casual.

Also useful is the What size am I calculator for working out your sizing in different shops, which I find infinitely helpful as it means less faffing about with different sizes in the changing room/ruling out particular shops that just aren't going to fit me.
posted by halcyonday at 4:25 AM on April 5, 2013 [3 favorites]


Peplums - the thing with the height/bust means they usually hit a bit above the waist on me, which isn't ideal.

Oh!

You have a longer back waist length than the norm, it's not your (total) height! See, sizes take into account some waist length variation according to total height, and a size 16 should be the right waist length within a half an inch for someone who's 5'10". But if a regular size 16 is hitting you at "empire waist" height, then this fellow tall, long-torsoed woman is willing to bet you have a few extra inches in your torso, making for a longer back waist length. I'm 5'11" but my legs are those of a 5'8" woman, see, the rest of my height is in my elongated torso. And like you, everything store-bought with a defined waist, looks like an empire waist on me. Which does not work at all for fitted dresses or blouses.

This means that anything fitted over your torso will need to be custom-done in order to look right, I'm afraid. But the upside is that since you do know of some custom places, you would just need to take into account that extra measurement and let them know about it.

It will make a huge difference in how you look, btw. I sew for myself, and things like princess seams that I had tried out store-bought and looked dumpy on me, now look very flattering since they have the extra length in the torso.

Sorry I can't help beyond that, I am flat. AAA flat.
posted by fraula at 4:29 AM on April 5, 2013 [2 favorites]


I can also recommend BiuBiu - though they're not super fashionable, their clothes are well made and they fit really well. I'm not plus sized but I am curvy, and I find most high street clothes are too small in the bust and too big in the waist on me. BiuBiu fits like a glove, and with the currency conversion from Polish zlotys to pounds they are quite reasonably priced.
posted by RubyScarlet at 5:06 AM on April 5, 2013


Do you have Tall Girl stores over there? Might help.
posted by windykites at 6:47 AM on April 5, 2013


I sometimes feel like a different species next to other girls

Well, for what it's worth, I think you sound utterly gorgeous.

Having a shape that doesn't work with off the rack is a serious pain, but I'm going to share a secret with you: Everybody else is in the same boat. It's just that a lot of people are in varying degrees of denial about it.

You know those tv shows that have wardrobe makeovers? The fact is, every single one of those, as well as every piece of clothing your average celebrity wears to be seen in public, and everything actors wear in movies and tv, it's all tailored. You can have your clothes tailored too!

I have kind of the diagonal problem to you - I have very straight hips, a super short torso, and a J-cup bust. According to the lies they tell me in department stores I can be anywhere from a size 6 to a size 18 in US "standard" and none of it ever fits me. So, if I have anything more than a tshirt or jeans, I tend to get it tailored. It's great that you're willing to spend extra money to get things that really fit you that you love, because that's what you'll do: Get something that you love that fits you in one of your measurements (probably your torso length, maybe your bust or hips) and is large everywhere else, and then pay an additional cost to get it tailored to fit you. Regular people go to tailors, too, I promise. Almost any style of clothing you fancy will look good on you if you get it adjusted to fit, so you can really pursue your own personal expression.
posted by Mizu at 7:16 AM on April 5, 2013


Yeah, I'm sorry if it sounded like I was trying to pressurise you into a certain way of dressing; I didn't mean that at all. Only that quite a lot of the time, I come across people who say 'I'd love to dress [a certain way], but I wouldn't dare to', and a lot of the time they'd be better off just doing it, and doing it really well, rather than trying to 'tone themselves down' for an imaginary audience. If dressing like Joan Holloway would make you feel uncomfortable, don't.
posted by Acheman at 7:47 AM on April 5, 2013 [2 favorites]


I am so psyched to see this post because I am pretty much your American twin, minus the red hair. I hear you about feeling like a different species when you're standing next to a 5-foot-nothing nymph. Just try to remind yourself: who wants to be a nymph when you can be a sexy valkaryrie/amazon queen in heels?

All the advice ferdinandcc's friend gave is spot on. I'd also add:

- Lately, my busty-role-model has been Bernadette from Big Bang Theory. She's short, but has the same chest issues we're talking about. :) She does this whole crop cardigan and full dress combo regularly. If you can find a good cardigan or crop-cardigan that fits your chest, pairing that with a cute dress is super flattering for chesty ladies.
-A lot of pretty-but-baggy dresses can be made flattering for curvy gals like us with a belt cinched at (or just above/below) our narrowest part. For me, that's a few inches below my bust.
-V NECKS. They do WONDERS to my torso. Also, those drapey necklines that just kind of puddle in cleavage aren't bad either, just make sure they are a lower cut.
-Wrap dresses and tops.
-Long necklaces. My favorite way to dress up a plain top is a pretty silver chain necklace that hangs about to my bellybutton. It downplays the chest and emphasizes your long line.
-You're tall, so you can totally rock as high a boot as you want. My favorite winter outfit: cute (often cheap) dress, black leggings and knee high flat-heel boots for warmth.
posted by ninjakins at 7:48 AM on April 5, 2013 [3 favorites]


Hiya!

I'm 50 and I have your figure as well. Indeed, one realizes that one's wardrobe is inappropriate on a regular basis.

Today, I'm wearing a pair of Liz Claiborn ankle length pants, primarily black with a white/turquoise/lime paisley print, a turquoise cami, and a fit and flair black jacket, with some black and white Puma flats. I'm pretty cute and appropriate, I must say.

I'm finding as I get older to be so much pickier about things.

I find surplice wrap tops are very flattering, I have to put a cami on to keep from being too bodacious.

I try to tone down the bottoms, I'm not a fan of drawing attention to my very large legs.

Deep V stuff, with cami's underneath look nice and really help me look leaner.

Also, excellent bras work wonders!

I shy away from blouses with buttons, they fit horribly, bunch up, are uncomfortable. I usually wear high-quality T-shirts, with sweaters, or jackets made of flowy materials. As much as I love a constructed blazer...it's just never going to work with my figure.

I do get things tailored. If I find pants that look great on my legs, I have the waist taken in, and the legs hemmed (I'm 5'5", so right on the borderline for petites).

I find that with my short waist, that layering stuff really helps, so a plain skirt, a cami, then a sweater that's a hair shorter than the cami...that works pretty well.

If I must wear a blouse, I'll usually pop on a vest over it. Actually, it's a knit shell, usually meant to be worn in a sweaterset, but hey, whatever works. This covers up gaps, fit problems and obscures my waist.

I'm also discovering that I can take 50 items to the fitting room and be VERY lucky if I emerge with one item to buy and wear.

If you find something that works (a Tulip skirt, a pair of jeans, a very comfy pair of shoes) buy multiples in different colors!
posted by Ruthless Bunny at 8:20 AM on April 5, 2013 [1 favorite]


I have a couple of friends in your size and height range. One swears by Long Tall Sally, and always looks fabulous. The styling is quite contemporary, but there are plenty of sheath dresses and pencil skirts for your vintage mojo. Another has some gorgeous dresses from Anna Scholz. Pricey, but nicely done and worth the money.

And red. I'm red too. Try orange and green, both trending at the moment.
posted by Elizabeth the Thirteenth at 8:31 AM on April 5, 2013


As a fellow tall, long-waisted, busty person, I certainly sympathize! I am still working out some of my own wardrobe dilemmas but here's what I've learned:

1) A GOOD TAILOR IS A MUST. Especially for trousers and skirts. You can buy things that fit your hips and thighs and have the waist taken in. Ta da! Clothes that fit. Same with shirts. Minor alterations are not expensive and your clothing will look like it cost 5x as much if it fits you well.

2) I wear a lot of V-necks and draped necklines (not too low, if you have a large bust these can get not-work-appropriate very quickly, but a camisole can rescue things)

3) Most button-down shirts don't fit my bust if they fit my shoulders, but a small amount of stretch usually manages to compensate for the bust issue without straining buttons. Shirts with bust darts THAT FALL IN THE RIGHT PLACE are also better for larger-chested women. I usually buy button-down stretch shirts in Tall from Lands' End when they are on sale and then have them taken in at the sides to make them less frumpy.

4) YES to blazers/jackets with princess seams. I wear them a lot over plain scoop-neck stretch Ts from H&M and with the addition of a nice necklace the look is perfectly professional.

5) I try to avoid anything off the rack that is intentionally empire-waisted because the bust and long-waistedness just mean that the "waist" ends up halfway up my bustline.

6) If you have any dressmaking skills at all and are interested in trying this, a "full bust adjustment" is actually not very difficult. It just involves some slashing and spreading the pattern and then making a muslin to test the fit. There are YouTube tutorials on this and the book Fit for Every Body also has an easy-to-follow approach. If you like to sew, the book Gertie's New Book For Better Sewing has some vintage-inspired pieces that are not very difficult to make and would probably look smashing on you.
posted by The Elusive Architeuthis at 8:37 AM on April 5, 2013


Response by poster: I have a friend who is good at dressmaking, and we keep meaning to have an FBA session, but it's dependent on when we both have time. I've tried myself and got really frustrated because there seems to be so many inches needing adding and I can never work out where. I'll need someone experienced to walk me through that.

With plus sizes and specialist places like Long Tall Sally, I'm an inbetweenie - too tall/busty/wide for straight sizes, not enough for the specialist ranges. I can't fit both the girls into an ASOS 18 (though their skirts are fine, or would be if they actually covered my pants) but the Curve range starts too big and won't fit my waist.

I haven't been able to wear a blouse with buttons since I was about 20. They won't button up in the right place, or will but leave me looking like a portly man (hello, Gap 'boyfriend' fit shirt) - I've seen some plus-size bloggers do the androgynous look well, but it isn't for me. This is where I am pleased about working in a casual office.
posted by mippy at 9:27 AM on April 5, 2013


I also verge on being an inbetweenie (US size 14) with a hourglass to pear figure, and verge on being tall for trouser and sleeve length. I am in the US and buy successfully from Boden and Eddie Bauer tall for long sleeved things like turtlenecks. I occasionally buy pieces from Heartbreaker and Trashy Diva and I have a couple of dresses and shirts in mind from Pinup Girl but you really have to be careful about styling them to keep from looking costumey. (I believe they all ship to the UK; I don't know the UK equivalents, sorry.)

I almost never wear anything button-up at all, and I generally buy separates because I'm also very short-waisted. Hope this helps.
posted by immlass at 10:01 AM on April 5, 2013


Frocks and frou frou is a great blog written by a friend. She's busty and curvy and always looks stunning. (link here)

If you want some help with FBAs, I've been watching the "Sew the Perfect Fit" video on craftsy and found it really useful. I believe they are having a sale too, so you might be able to get a discount!
posted by jonathanstrange at 10:06 AM on April 5, 2013


Biu biu won't fit you sadly. I'm 6' and their stuff is all 3-4" too short for me. With all the darting that's a no-go.

Long Tall Sally and TopShop are probably your best bet for stretchy tops and you'll just have to have skirts and pants tailored. If you want to risk ordering some US stuff try GAP tall sizes and run bigger. They often come in larger sizes. A UK 18 makes you probably a US 14.
posted by fshgrl at 10:55 AM on April 5, 2013


I add press-studs between my buttons on shirts so they don't gape in inopportune places. Just a quick fix suggestion if you have some shirts or blouses you really like.

I am more of a pear shape than you, but I do recommend reading the ModCloth customer comments on the dresses you like. I know that shipping on ModCloth stuff is expensive to the UK, but I have found a couple of amazingly flattering dresses on there that fit like a glove, mainly by following the tips of women with very similar measurements to me.

Also, some of the good designers on ModCloth are British, so maybe you could find their stuff in England without having to go through the international shipping route.
posted by vickyverky at 10:59 AM on April 5, 2013


I'd second Boden -- I still haven't ordered from their US division, but someday I probably will. They do have a lot of cute stuff, and I share your sizing pain.

I stay away from anything with a jewel or crew neck, and stick completely to v-necks or in a pinch if something I like doesn't have a v-neck option, a scoopneck. You might also be able to rock a ballet- or boat-neck top, and then if you throw on a necklace, it will add a v line that keeps the focus toward the face.

For us girls with an hourglass shape, stay away from the boxy trend -- or the trend of sweaters/jumpers with the bat-wing shaped sleeves that are currently in. They do us no favors, even if they seem to accommodate our busts.
posted by emcat8 at 2:57 PM on April 5, 2013


I'm not tall but I've got similar proportions and peplums just do not work when your breasts are this size, not without being tailor made. There is just not enough fabric to go over, so it pulls the waist up to underboob and bam! frump town. And not comfy frump town either.

Lately I have given up on this 'dress retro' BS. I'm done and over it because I don't WANT to emphasise my secondary sexual characteristics. I want to be comfortable. Some retro inspired stuff (high waisted jeans are the only ones I am comfortable in once I converted, and the only skirts I like are pencil skirts) but mostly it feels costume and overtly sexy and I'm so done with that right now. And I'm kinda done with 'oh, you should wear a-line/bootcut/blahblahblah' as well.

My core wardrobe is: high-waist + wideleg jeans, two of these dresses, a similar one in purple, this dress, leggings, black pencil skirts, elbow length scoop/boatneck knit tops, men's t-shirts (wear tucked into skirts and jeans), cardigans, my absolute favourite black batwing top, skinny jeans (that I want to get rid of but they're great with boots in winter and with that top) and panache bras. Oh and my latest purchase is a shapeless boatneck/capsleeve top (effectively a square with neck/armholes) in a butterfly print that looks amazing with pencil skirts/wideleg pants as long as it's tucked in.

Experiment with tucking things in, experiment with the kinds of shapes you like and what feels comfortable. As much as those dresses I linked are tight, and make my boobs stand out, they are comfortable as and the higher neckline makes it less overtly sexual. I mean, I'm still lumpy since I don't do shapewear, but it's comfortable.
posted by geek anachronism at 4:17 PM on April 5, 2013


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