Protective, loving dogs and vulnerable, little babies
February 23, 2009 9:40 AM Subscribe
Our dog of six years is very loving and smart, but he's also overly protective and skiddish. What kind of problems will this create if my wife and I decide to have a baby? Has anyone had experience introducing newborns to over-protective pups?
Our dog is a dobie / shepherd mix, and extremely protective around strangers (when they're on his turf). He's never bitten anyone, nor has he tried to attack; his M.O. is to bark and growl and try to herd my wife and I. He eventually calms down once he realizes the strangers mean no harm, but he's still jumpy while they're in the house (e.g. he'll jump up and bark at them if they stand up too quickly). stop barking at them, but once he gets us
Around us, however, when we're alone, he's completely relaxed, snuggly, and affectionate. My question is how he might act if we bring a baby home one day. I assume he'll be okay with it, since he'll be seeing it everyday, and eventually come to protect it like he does my wife and I. Even still, I'm wondering if anyone has first-hand experience with a similar situation. If so, I'd love to hear how the dog handled the transition, and if the protective behavior ever posed a problem around a newborn.
Thanks!
Our dog is a dobie / shepherd mix, and extremely protective around strangers (when they're on his turf). He's never bitten anyone, nor has he tried to attack; his M.O. is to bark and growl and try to herd my wife and I. He eventually calms down once he realizes the strangers mean no harm, but he's still jumpy while they're in the house (e.g. he'll jump up and bark at them if they stand up too quickly). stop barking at them, but once he gets us
Around us, however, when we're alone, he's completely relaxed, snuggly, and affectionate. My question is how he might act if we bring a baby home one day. I assume he'll be okay with it, since he'll be seeing it everyday, and eventually come to protect it like he does my wife and I. Even still, I'm wondering if anyone has first-hand experience with a similar situation. If so, I'd love to hear how the dog handled the transition, and if the protective behavior ever posed a problem around a newborn.
Thanks!
No personal experience, but my friends with dogs and kids have mentioned the following.
A few months before the baby is born, start keeping baby items with a smell (diapers, powder, etc) around the house. The dog will learn that those smells, and thus the baby, belong in the house.
Make sure to give your dog one on one time each day. Take your dog for a walk and leave the stroller at home. This lets your dog know he is still loved.
If the dog ever nips at your baby, even in play, discipline him immediately and severely. The dog must understand that aggression towards a baby is never acceptable. And if you're a softy like me, follow it up later with some extra loving time.
posted by mandapanda at 10:06 AM on February 23, 2009
A few months before the baby is born, start keeping baby items with a smell (diapers, powder, etc) around the house. The dog will learn that those smells, and thus the baby, belong in the house.
Make sure to give your dog one on one time each day. Take your dog for a walk and leave the stroller at home. This lets your dog know he is still loved.
If the dog ever nips at your baby, even in play, discipline him immediately and severely. The dog must understand that aggression towards a baby is never acceptable. And if you're a softy like me, follow it up later with some extra loving time.
posted by mandapanda at 10:06 AM on February 23, 2009
My friends had a border collie and they had to find her a new home after the birth of their son. Border collies are notoriously smart, protective, neurotic, and always need something to do, they constantly herd people, etc. Apparently the big issue was that the dog hated it when the mother of the household (to whom the dog was most attached) tried to feed the baby, would bark, bite, become aggressive. It would also try to herd the mother away from the baby pretty much constantly. It sounds like you're one step ahead of the problem, though, trying to figure out strategies to get the dog comfy with a newborn. Good luck.
posted by billysumday at 10:13 AM on February 23, 2009
posted by billysumday at 10:13 AM on February 23, 2009
In addition to the smell tricks mentioned above, I've read recommendations such as:
put the baby's blanket/swing chair/anything else he might be in on the floor well in advance of baby's arrival. Train the dog that it is not to be near those items, as they are "baby space". Ideally, this means that when the baby is in the blanket/chair the dog will know not to approach.
As soon as possible after the baby's birth, bring home a blanket or something that the baby has been in, so the dog can get used to the smell of the baby itself.
I'm sure there are tons of other tips/tricks - I'll also second the dog whisperer suggestion
posted by um_maverick at 10:36 AM on February 23, 2009
put the baby's blanket/swing chair/anything else he might be in on the floor well in advance of baby's arrival. Train the dog that it is not to be near those items, as they are "baby space". Ideally, this means that when the baby is in the blanket/chair the dog will know not to approach.
As soon as possible after the baby's birth, bring home a blanket or something that the baby has been in, so the dog can get used to the smell of the baby itself.
I'm sure there are tons of other tips/tricks - I'll also second the dog whisperer suggestion
posted by um_maverick at 10:36 AM on February 23, 2009
We have a Shepard, a Husky and a 4 month old. Both our dogs have met little kids at parks, and are very well socialed with people. However, the husky came from a home originally with a young kid, but apparently repeatedly ate the kid's toys and was put up for adoption. As we started to aquire toys post-baby shower, I started to leave them out and around as temptations for him. In addition, what was designated the baby's room was gated off regularly, and then occasionally opened it up. We shooed him away from the baby's toys, and we worked hard to establish a rule that they weren't allowed in the baby's room unaccompanied by us. Both dogs took this pretty well; however, then our son was actually born.
Suddenly there was very little time for them. They didn't get the excersize they used to as taking a baby outside in the snow and ice is very difficult with two dogs (the husky will be perpetually leashed outside unless he's in a fenced in yard). So they both got a little stir crazy... plus the shepard refused to be away from the baby...
We had a few incidents where the baby would cry and the shepard would go nuts. By nuts I mean, race immediately to the side of his crib, shove us out of the way, sit down very politely and bark almost directly in his face until we told him to stop and picked up the baby. In his mind, he was protecting the baby. So we re-established dominance with him and set things right. (There was also a single incident where he barked and lunged slightly at a neighbor when we were all headed to the car since he thought he was protecting us)
Unfortunately the husky now barks randomly when the shepard walks by, and positions himself in oportune places for that to occur as well (such as infront of the water dishes). Unlike the shepard, he's significantly harder to instruct (he refuses correction). Occasionally he'll do it and wake up the baby... though the positive from this is generally our son can sleep through dogs barking, dog food time, me getting home from work, and other massive noisy outbursts which occur multiple times in a day...
posted by Nanukthedog at 11:09 AM on February 23, 2009
Suddenly there was very little time for them. They didn't get the excersize they used to as taking a baby outside in the snow and ice is very difficult with two dogs (the husky will be perpetually leashed outside unless he's in a fenced in yard). So they both got a little stir crazy... plus the shepard refused to be away from the baby...
We had a few incidents where the baby would cry and the shepard would go nuts. By nuts I mean, race immediately to the side of his crib, shove us out of the way, sit down very politely and bark almost directly in his face until we told him to stop and picked up the baby. In his mind, he was protecting the baby. So we re-established dominance with him and set things right. (There was also a single incident where he barked and lunged slightly at a neighbor when we were all headed to the car since he thought he was protecting us)
Unfortunately the husky now barks randomly when the shepard walks by, and positions himself in oportune places for that to occur as well (such as infront of the water dishes). Unlike the shepard, he's significantly harder to instruct (he refuses correction). Occasionally he'll do it and wake up the baby... though the positive from this is generally our son can sleep through dogs barking, dog food time, me getting home from work, and other massive noisy outbursts which occur multiple times in a day...
posted by Nanukthedog at 11:09 AM on February 23, 2009
There's a detail that you left out of your question that really changes how the question is answered. Are you planning to adopt, or are you intending to have a baby of your own? The reason I ask this is that if your wife gets pregnant, she is going to start smelling different. In my case, the dog noticed this immediately. (In retrospect, the dog told me I smelled different before the pregnancy test told me I was pregnant.) The hormones change your scent, and when mr. ambrosia finally came back from the hospital with one of our son's baby blankets to introduce his scent, our dog took one sniff and seemed to recognize it immediately. For about the first 48 hours he did get a little nosy when the baby cried ("there is a creature in distress! I must investigate what you are doing to this little creature") But he fairly quickly understood that baby crying was not his job, and after that adjustment doesn't react at all to the baby's cries. Over the course of your wife's pregnancy your dog will have time to incorporate new scents into his known world. Obviously if you are planning to adopt, you won't have this built-in adjustment time.
We have a pretty protective 8 year old Shepherd-Rottie mix. The only real change in his behavior is that he is perhaps a bit barkier about people walking past the front of our house (heaven forbid that our neighbors get a package delivered by UPS.) He is great with our son and very quickly understood which toys are his and which are not. Nevertheless, I am very careful not to leave the two of them together unattended. Not that I am worried about anything, but I'd prefer to keep it that way.
posted by ambrosia at 11:37 AM on February 23, 2009
We have a pretty protective 8 year old Shepherd-Rottie mix. The only real change in his behavior is that he is perhaps a bit barkier about people walking past the front of our house (heaven forbid that our neighbors get a package delivered by UPS.) He is great with our son and very quickly understood which toys are his and which are not. Nevertheless, I am very careful not to leave the two of them together unattended. Not that I am worried about anything, but I'd prefer to keep it that way.
posted by ambrosia at 11:37 AM on February 23, 2009
We got our dog about three months before the birth of our first son. She immediately incorporated him into her circle of protection.
This is probably the outcome in, I'm going to say, 9 out of 10 cases of new baby+protective dog. If it is not the outcome you are going to get, you will see it immediately (like the situation billysumday mentions, and it will probably mean finding a new home for your pup.
The whole leaving-baby-things-around-early and bringing-home-a-blanket-from-the-hospital thing probably doesn't hurt, but I have known several people who didn't do it, and still ended up with perfectly fine dog/babe relationships.
posted by Rock Steady at 12:00 PM on February 23, 2009
This is probably the outcome in, I'm going to say, 9 out of 10 cases of new baby+protective dog. If it is not the outcome you are going to get, you will see it immediately (like the situation billysumday mentions, and it will probably mean finding a new home for your pup.
The whole leaving-baby-things-around-early and bringing-home-a-blanket-from-the-hospital thing probably doesn't hurt, but I have known several people who didn't do it, and still ended up with perfectly fine dog/babe relationships.
posted by Rock Steady at 12:00 PM on February 23, 2009
Get help from a professional trainer. Your dog needs to be well socialized.
It's not just the baby - as time goes by you'll start having babysitters, friends, etc. over. What if the dog grows protective of the baby, and then the baby grows into a little kid and starts wrestling/chasing/running around with his or her little buddies? The kids could be in for a nasty surprise and you could have quite a liability on your hands.
posted by txvtchick at 12:52 PM on February 23, 2009
It's not just the baby - as time goes by you'll start having babysitters, friends, etc. over. What if the dog grows protective of the baby, and then the baby grows into a little kid and starts wrestling/chasing/running around with his or her little buddies? The kids could be in for a nasty surprise and you could have quite a liability on your hands.
posted by txvtchick at 12:52 PM on February 23, 2009
Here's another semi-related recent AskMe. Interesting thread where many share their experiences re new baby with dog situation.
posted by misozaki at 5:39 PM on February 23, 2009
posted by misozaki at 5:39 PM on February 23, 2009
as a former professional dog trainer i have to second txvtchick's comment. he will most likely take on the job of protecting the baby right away but your dog is poorly socialized and at 6 years old it could take some work to change that. one of the MOST IMPORTANT things you should do with a dog is introduce it to a great number of people. as many as possible, all shapes sizes and colors. fido needs to know that stranger does not equal threat. (don't worry he'll always defend you from any ACTUAL threats)
personal anecdote: my brother had an australien shepard (very smart) for about a year before i was born. of course when i came along i usurped her as the baby and got alot of the attention she was used to. she never forgave me for that. seriously the dog hated me. she wouldn't play with me she wouldn't cuddle with me, nada. we were NOT pals. that being said we were family and god help you if you made a threatening guesture towards me she would have taken you down. go figure.
posted by swbarrett at 8:11 PM on February 23, 2009
personal anecdote: my brother had an australien shepard (very smart) for about a year before i was born. of course when i came along i usurped her as the baby and got alot of the attention she was used to. she never forgave me for that. seriously the dog hated me. she wouldn't play with me she wouldn't cuddle with me, nada. we were NOT pals. that being said we were family and god help you if you made a threatening guesture towards me she would have taken you down. go figure.
posted by swbarrett at 8:11 PM on February 23, 2009
This thread is closed to new comments.
But she was alot younger and had a much shorter time alone with us.
She is still sometimes very protective at the dog park but is mostly pretty okay with the whole situation. Unless you are the UPS man, something about those trucks and uniforms really sets her off.
I'd recommend watching the Dog Whisperer, he has dealt with this situation numerous times. There are some other good resources as well.
posted by fenriq at 9:50 AM on February 23, 2009