Best Toilet Paper Evar
June 1, 2008 12:48 PM Subscribe
Best Toilet Paper Ever!
Alright, who makes the best toilet paper ever? Surely some amount of money will bring you soft, disposable fine linens that magically don't clog a toilet.
Alright, who makes the best toilet paper ever? Surely some amount of money will bring you soft, disposable fine linens that magically don't clog a toilet.
Charmin Ultra. No contest. Although next time I run out I'm going to try their new extra-strong.
posted by jtfowl0 at 1:04 PM on June 1, 2008
posted by jtfowl0 at 1:04 PM on June 1, 2008
I'm partial to Cottonelle with ripples (with Aloe & E too). It's the only thing I buy now.
posted by disaster77 at 1:07 PM on June 1, 2008
posted by disaster77 at 1:07 PM on June 1, 2008
So you're looking for an actual luxury item, right? Not consumer reports on our individual preferences toward regular name-brands?
posted by [NOT HERMITOSIS-IST] at 1:16 PM on June 1, 2008
posted by [NOT HERMITOSIS-IST] at 1:16 PM on June 1, 2008
Charmin Extra Strong. It's soft & strong, not to mention I use far fewer sheets than with any other brand.
posted by dreaming in stereo at 1:25 PM on June 1, 2008
posted by dreaming in stereo at 1:25 PM on June 1, 2008
in canada: BOCE brand recycled toilet paper. i see it at many dollar stores. it's from quebec, it comes in 4-packs, and it's about $0.25 / roll. i admit that it's not exactly like wiping your butt on a fluffy kitten, but it's recycled toilet paper, and it's quite soft.
the environmentalist in me would like to point out that non-recycled toilet paper is made from old growth forests.
if you find non-luxury toilet paper too rough, you can keep a bottle of light, unscented hand lotion in the loo, and put a teeny squirt on the toilet paper before using it.
posted by twistofrhyme at 1:29 PM on June 1, 2008 [1 favorite]
the environmentalist in me would like to point out that non-recycled toilet paper is made from old growth forests.
if you find non-luxury toilet paper too rough, you can keep a bottle of light, unscented hand lotion in the loo, and put a teeny squirt on the toilet paper before using it.
posted by twistofrhyme at 1:29 PM on June 1, 2008 [1 favorite]
I am pretty partial to Cottonelle Fresh Flushable Moist Wipes, but buy the double-rolls of Kleenex Cottonelle for the naysayers.
Most of the adults I've introduced the moist wipes to have become fans.
posted by Incognita at 1:32 PM on June 1, 2008
Most of the adults I've introduced the moist wipes to have become fans.
posted by Incognita at 1:32 PM on June 1, 2008
A quick google turns up this Renova stuff, but the rich would just use a bidet would they not?
posted by onya at 1:33 PM on June 1, 2008
posted by onya at 1:33 PM on June 1, 2008
Renova. On a stainless-steel wall-mounted dispenser (service the spring in the stationary arm regularly to ensure stability), with the roll oriented to dispense paper from underneath rather than from above — the hoi polloi may delight in the illusion of easy access provided by the uncouth overhand position, but any connoisseur naturally intuits that an underhand alignment provides for more leverage and, therefore, greater precision when "taking charge" of one's chosen segment of tissue. Consider inserting an additional cardboard tube so as to reinforce the original; this impedes (but does not avert) the steady deformation of the tube which inevitably leads to an irregular, "clunky" unspooling rate. Serve with a light Beaujolais.
Charmin Ultra is also really nice
posted by decagon at 2:16 PM on June 1, 2008
Charmin Ultra is also really nice
posted by decagon at 2:16 PM on June 1, 2008
buy as much of the cheapest toilet paper you can find
I could not disagree with this more. Life is too short to use cheap toilet paper.
*wipes butt with fluffy kitten*
Charmin Ultra is available by the metric ton at my local warehouse store -- I never run out, I never think about having to buy TP more than once every three months or so. The package is almost too large to fit in my car, but that's a problem tie-downs and ingenuity can solve.
posted by BitterOldPunk at 2:21 PM on June 1, 2008 [2 favorites]
I could not disagree with this more. Life is too short to use cheap toilet paper.
*wipes butt with fluffy kitten*
Charmin Ultra is available by the metric ton at my local warehouse store -- I never run out, I never think about having to buy TP more than once every three months or so. The package is almost too large to fit in my car, but that's a problem tie-downs and ingenuity can solve.
posted by BitterOldPunk at 2:21 PM on June 1, 2008 [2 favorites]
Cottonelle! Cottonelle! Cottonelle!
posted by brain cloud at 3:19 PM on June 1, 2008
posted by brain cloud at 3:19 PM on June 1, 2008
Charmin Ultra when the local (only) grocery store has it in stock.
Or Sports Illustrated and/or ESPN magazine pages, which are always handy.
posted by Smalltown Girl at 3:28 PM on June 1, 2008
Or Sports Illustrated and/or ESPN magazine pages, which are always handy.
posted by Smalltown Girl at 3:28 PM on June 1, 2008
Charmin Basic toilet paper, supplemented when necessary by Cottonelle Fresh Wipes.
posted by amyms at 3:30 PM on June 1, 2008
posted by amyms at 3:30 PM on June 1, 2008
I second Incognita's plug for Cottonelle's Flushable Moise Wipes. Who wants to smear the stuff around and then pull up your britches?! Get it off, clean it off, and feel like a million bucks! It truly is a feeling that is worth the extra few pennies buying wipes will cost you. I've even started to buy the generic brand and have experienced the same results.
Man, all this talking about the bliss that comes with using flushable wipes has me looking forward to my next BM.
posted by Detuned Radio at 3:37 PM on June 1, 2008
Man, all this talking about the bliss that comes with using flushable wipes has me looking forward to my next BM.
posted by Detuned Radio at 3:37 PM on June 1, 2008
"ShitBegone toilet paper is a quality product that exemplifies your attitude and approach to life.
Part journey of discovery, part assertion of responsibility, part embrace of life, ShitBegone expresses hope and belief that a better world is possible."
posted by Rock Steady at 3:54 PM on June 1, 2008
Part journey of discovery, part assertion of responsibility, part embrace of life, ShitBegone expresses hope and belief that a better world is possible."
posted by Rock Steady at 3:54 PM on June 1, 2008
ShitBegone. 100% recycled; union labor; the owner has this whole philosophy behind it, and tells you how it's made. It isn't fluffy, velvety, or "quilted", and it's kinda expensive, but a case will last at least a year and the shipping is free.
Also a vote for keeping a container of wet wipes in the loo. I can't believe I never thought of it before I had kids, but it just makes sense.
posted by Melinika at 4:08 PM on June 1, 2008
Also a vote for keeping a container of wet wipes in the loo. I can't believe I never thought of it before I had kids, but it just makes sense.
posted by Melinika at 4:08 PM on June 1, 2008
Haha, must remember if said kids distract me while I try to post, that preview is my friend.
posted by Melinika at 4:10 PM on June 1, 2008
posted by Melinika at 4:10 PM on June 1, 2008
I'm allergic to perfumes and other such crap so can only use Sorbent Hypoallergenic. When I'm out of town for extended time periods my boyfriend still buys it because it's just so damn nice. I've ruined him for cheap toilet paper.
Anything designed for sensitive skin and lacking in pointless perfumes and chemicals is going to be good, but be aware that this is pretty much the most expensive type in our supermarket.
posted by shelleycat at 4:21 PM on June 1, 2008 [1 favorite]
Anything designed for sensitive skin and lacking in pointless perfumes and chemicals is going to be good, but be aware that this is pretty much the most expensive type in our supermarket.
posted by shelleycat at 4:21 PM on June 1, 2008 [1 favorite]
Anything from the UK (except maybe Izal hard toilet paper; it's like tracing paper). I dunno how it's different, but British bog roll works better, with less.
posted by scruss at 4:55 PM on June 1, 2008
posted by scruss at 4:55 PM on June 1, 2008
I used to use the Charmin in the red package before they "made it better" - Ultra Strong is like Ultra Paper-Towel to me. One pack of that and my business end wasn't too happy.
My current setup is just like amyms'. I love Charmin basic. It's one-ply and I never have any clog problems with it. It's a good mixture between soft and strong (really, somewhat similar to what the old Charmin red was). I also supplement with Cottonelle wipes.
posted by odi.et.amo at 5:40 PM on June 1, 2008
My current setup is just like amyms'. I love Charmin basic. It's one-ply and I never have any clog problems with it. It's a good mixture between soft and strong (really, somewhat similar to what the old Charmin red was). I also supplement with Cottonelle wipes.
posted by odi.et.amo at 5:40 PM on June 1, 2008
I can't believe this thread. CHARMIN SUCKS. It leaves dust everywhere -- on the floor, on you.
COTTONELLE WITH RIPPLES.
posted by kmennie at 5:46 PM on June 1, 2008
COTTONELLE WITH RIPPLES.
posted by kmennie at 5:46 PM on June 1, 2008
Single ply store brand. Less paper in the septic system. Life's too short for cheap beer or cheap coffee, but cheap toilet paper is fine by me. If there was unbleached, recycled tp at my store, I'd buy that.
posted by theora55 at 6:20 PM on June 1, 2008 [1 favorite]
posted by theora55 at 6:20 PM on June 1, 2008 [1 favorite]
Angel Soft. Is this a regional brand? Because otherwise I can't understand why it hasn't been mentioned. I'm with kmennie, Charmin is horrible! Dusty lint in the air, on the floor, and in sensitive places that should never have what are essentially little slivers of wood on them. Angel Soft is cheap, lint free, and universally available, at least in the PNW.
posted by HotToddy at 7:09 PM on June 1, 2008
posted by HotToddy at 7:09 PM on June 1, 2008
Charmin Basic here, too. I'd rather drink cheap or no beer than use cheap toilet paper. Unlike kittens, it isn't linty ... or reusable.
posted by notashroom at 7:12 PM on June 1, 2008
posted by notashroom at 7:12 PM on June 1, 2008
What's wrong with you people? Stop whatever you are doing and get yourself some Charmin Plus with Aloe immediately. These days I think it has chamomile too (to put your butt to sleep?). I actually miss the original C+wA. It had more lotion infused in it and was an absolute dream to use. It was like a very slightly moistened baby blanket, you know, that white, pebbled, stretchy, soft wonderful kind? It was a dream. I guess people thought it was too lotiony, though, because they backed off of it. It still feels great though. The texture is just right. Doesn't feel papery. My bum isn't happy when I use anything else. It sulks and gets all passive aggressive on me.
posted by Askr at 7:39 PM on June 1, 2008
posted by Askr at 7:39 PM on June 1, 2008
I've been a Charmin Ultra convert for a long time - but there are two problems that hae been bothering me.
#1
The environment. Do I really need to wipe my ass with virgin forest and agricultural products? There seems to be a metaphor in there.
#2
[snicker]
#2.1
kmennie is right. Charmin leaves dust/lint under the roll and, ahem, under me. I feel that if I'm paying top dollar for ostensibly premium butt wipe, I shouldn't have to worry about dingleberries.
All of this has led me to believe that I need to switch to Seventh Generation toilet paper. I've used it before (while house-sitting... heh...). It's soft, comfortable, and 100% recycled. Sure, it's more expensive than the cheap wax-paper crap - but it's not appreciably more expensive than Charmin Ultra. The big problem is that I can;t seem to find it in quantities greater than 4-packs. I currently buy Charmin Ultra at Costco, and really like having a ~6 month supply in the bathroom linen closet.
This thread seals the deal though. As inconvenient as it may be, I guy I'll just start buying multiple smaller packages. I need to stop being so damn wasteful with something that I'm literally going to just flush down the toilet. I'm now galvanized for (lint free) action!
posted by terpia at 7:53 PM on June 1, 2008
#1
The environment. Do I really need to wipe my ass with virgin forest and agricultural products? There seems to be a metaphor in there.
#2
[snicker]
#2.1
kmennie is right. Charmin leaves dust/lint under the roll and, ahem, under me. I feel that if I'm paying top dollar for ostensibly premium butt wipe, I shouldn't have to worry about dingleberries.
All of this has led me to believe that I need to switch to Seventh Generation toilet paper. I've used it before (while house-sitting... heh...). It's soft, comfortable, and 100% recycled. Sure, it's more expensive than the cheap wax-paper crap - but it's not appreciably more expensive than Charmin Ultra. The big problem is that I can;t seem to find it in quantities greater than 4-packs. I currently buy Charmin Ultra at Costco, and really like having a ~6 month supply in the bathroom linen closet.
This thread seals the deal though. As inconvenient as it may be, I guy I'll just start buying multiple smaller packages. I need to stop being so damn wasteful with something that I'm literally going to just flush down the toilet. I'm now galvanized for (lint free) action!
posted by terpia at 7:53 PM on June 1, 2008
I like spicy food. Really, really spicy food.
A pack of aloe baby wipes lasts a long time in the bathroom and really helps when it's time to pay the
posted by terpia at 7:56 PM on June 1, 2008
Costco's Kirkland brand. Soft, quilted and doesn't leave that dreaded TP dust everywhere. My only beef with the brand is that the rolls are individually wrapped - what a waste of paper. (probably meant for shop owners, etc. to put in their public bathrooms). The rolls are big and the price is right.
posted by wendees at 7:51 AM on June 9, 2008
posted by wendees at 7:51 AM on June 9, 2008
I'm all about Cottonelle as well though it sounds like you should be shopping for a toilet rather than tp that doesn't clog the toilet...
posted by mskonz at 5:52 AM on April 16, 2009
posted by mskonz at 5:52 AM on April 16, 2009
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by phunniemee at 1:03 PM on June 1, 2008