I have no life...during the day.

May 6, 2008 2:24 PM

I get bored and lonely on weekdays. What can I do?

There seems to be a lot of "what can I do?" and "how do I meet people?" here on metafilter and other forums. I notice that a lot of answers tend to be night or weekend oriented, such as taking a class, going to a pub trivia night, playing team sports, or doing community service.

I have a part-time job, do community service, and have a pretty active social life. However, those activities tend to take place at night and/or the weekends. When I was in school (just finished), I only had class at night or the weekends. So, on my weekdays, I just surf the net. Every now and then, I watch TV, or go to Borders/library. Most of my friends and relatives have day jobs or day classes.

I get bored and VERY lonely. I even get depressed on occasion. Summertime is coming up and I don't want to go through another dull summer.

posted by sixcolors to grab bag (13 comments total)

This is not rhetorical:

Why not get a daytime job?
posted by Tomorrowful at 2:33 PM on May 6, 2008 [2 favorites has favorites]

There are tons of organizations that would kill to have volunteers available on weekdays, or at least there are where I am. Start calling around. Especially in the summer, you may be able to pick up volunteer gigs at summer daycamps, if that appeals to you.

Can you get a full-time, M-F job?

My city's community college offers daytime, weekday classes, and there are options to take classes as a non-matriculating student (auditing, for example).

Set yourself a schedule and teach yourself a skill: learn a programming language, or an instrument (via videos on youtube, for example). Treat the non-working day as if it were a workday - from 9 to noon, study XYZ, break for lunch, then study ABC.

That's all I got.
posted by rtha at 2:34 PM on May 6, 2008

If you like children, you could volunteer to help out at your local library's children's department. In the summer, when the kids are out of school, almost all public libraries sponsor summer reading programs (which take place during the weekdays), with lots of cool activities, and they're always looking for volunteers to help with the various duties and events.
posted by amyms at 2:36 PM on May 6, 2008

You could go to the beach. Go to a matinee. Grocery shopping on a weekday is great. Or any shopping. Take up a musical instrument, horseback riding, dancing, anything that requires taking lessons from an instructor. They should be able to schedule around you. How about yoga or some new spiritual thing. Meet a friend for lunch or set up an ongoing lunch thing for all your friends. Visit your local nature center, bird sanctuary, park, fishing spot. If you live in the suburbs, take a bus into the city. If you're in the city, take a bus out to some town you never heard of. Check out a book on local architecture and start studying. Visit local ghost hunting sites. Take up gardening.
posted by suelange at 2:37 PM on May 6, 2008

I know what you're saying. You need hobbies and activities. Me, I've rededicated myself to cooking of late, and walking / bicycling. Metafilter and the Internet in general are terrible lures, but be firm and resolute. Is there anything that you'd be interested in making a hobby out of learning more of? If so, get to it. And maybe start a blog about it, too, to potentially plug you into a community of the like-minded.
posted by mumkin at 2:39 PM on May 6, 2008

Why not get a daytime job?

Good question, but it is an entirely different topic. One of them, having certain family obligations. I take one relative to work at 8:30 and pick another one at 2:30. Every now and then I have to watch after my grandma, the days that I have to are unpredictable.
posted by sixcolors at 2:41 PM on May 6, 2008

I work from home, so I can feel your pain. It's hard to be isolated during the week. Here's a few things I do to help:

1. Arrange lunch with friends. Most of my friends work downtown, so occasionally I'll take my laptop downtown and work from a coffee shop and see if anyone is available during their lunch hour.

2. Get out. Working from home means that I never really HAVE to leave. I try and get out for a bike ride or a walk everyday to combat the cabin-fever.

3. Some of my friends own their own businesses, so every once in a while I'll set up shop in their office and work from there.

4. Meet other people with weird hours. Lately I've been trying to seek out other people who don't work day jobs. Where I live, quite a few people my age work in the bar/restaurant industry and are often free during the daytime to hang out.

5. Spend time doing other things I love. One of the great things about having a flexible schedule is being able to take time to work on things that interest you. For instance, I've found that the daytime is perfect for me to play my guitar and listen to records because most people won't be around to be bothered by the noise.

6. Explore. I live in a big city, and there are plenty of places I have yet to see. Sometimes I'll just pick a direction and start riding until I find something interesting. An added bonus is that I end up finding new places to take my friends on the evenings and weekends.

Anyhow, those are a few of the things I enjoy doing during the day to combat the isolation. There are plenty of other things I could list, but It's really just a matter of finding things that interest you or extending yourself beyond your usual routines.
posted by ISeemToBeAVerb at 2:47 PM on May 6, 2008 [3 favorites has favorites]

Yes, consider volunteering!

Library volunteering doesn't have to involve children, by the way -- many libraries have all sorts of neat programs. My local library runs an FM radio station for the blind/visually impaired, and I volunteer there reading books and newspapers on the air. It does somebody good, it's extremely fun, and I've met some cool people there.

Speaking of radio, there's also your local NPR station -- they always need volunteers.
posted by tomboko at 2:48 PM on May 6, 2008

I work from home, so have something of the same problem. Two things I do that help are:

a) go to the gym regularly (it's amazing how cheering it is to be recognized and greeted, even if it's by a semi-random trainer)

b) make a point of having lunch with people. I view the lunches as partly for my sanity and partly networking, but getting up the nerve to invite people like my ex-boss the VP and the friend-of-a-friend who came highly recommended out for a casual lunch has worked out surprisingly well, as well as improving my small-talk skills no end :)
posted by restless_nomad at 3:03 PM on May 6, 2008

Work out. If you can afford and get to a gym, you'll be able to take your pick of daytime classes and never wait in line for workout equipment, since midmorning and afternoon hours are often far less busy than right before/after work. If you'd rather not join a gym, you can always run, walk, or do stuff from Crossfit at home. If you have podcasts or audiobooks to listen to while you do it, so much the better.

As for loneliness, volunteering sounds right up your alley.
posted by Metroid Baby at 3:07 PM on May 6, 2008

Ok, I will look into daytime volunteering. How do I find gigs? I rely on my friends for the weekend and night gigs.

I like the working out idea too.

I've been reading up and practicing on photography lately, but that gets old on some days, I need some variety.
posted by sixcolors at 3:25 PM on May 6, 2008

I'm the same way. I have weird hours and get the afternoon blahs on weekdays too. My boredom goes away around 5:00. For the past few months, I've enjoyed listening to talk radio or my favourite podcasts while cooking healthy meals from scratch. It keeps me entertained and keeps me company while I do something good for myself. Also, the cooking smells make my home cozy.
posted by heffalump at 3:37 PM on May 6, 2008

If you have Craigslist in your city you can browse the Volunteer section everyday and if you find something you like you can go and do it.
posted by amedia at 5:35 PM on May 6, 2008