Quarter-Life Crisis Filter

December 4, 2006 6:27 PM

QuarterLifeCrisisFilter: I have a low-commitment, entry-level job straight out of college. I'm looking for a better job, but I'm really unsure about what I want to do with my life.. There is, of course, much

I graduated in May with a film studies degree, and I'm currently working in an entry-level IT support position, living with a parent to save money even though I could afford an apartment on my current pay. I've done computer work (unpaid or paid) in one form or another basically since I was 10-ish, and I'm skilled at it, but the idea of spending the rest of my life in support really doesn't appeal to me. Nonetheless, I've been interviewing for better IT positions. At one interview, the interviewer said "it doesn't seem like you're the sort of person who could be happy to get out of bed every morning and help users." I think he was probably right. I wound up being offered that job, and turned it down.

I enjoy creative/film work, and I looked for work in film in DC, but I've only had a few short gigs. I wouldn't mind living somewhere else, but I'd need enough work there to get a room/apt (NY? Toronto?), and I'd need a room there to base myself out of and find work, so that's a chicken-and-egg problem I don't know how to deal with..

Now, a friend of mine from my undergrad work is at a graduate program in a field I'm really interested in, but has limited career potential -- "computing in the arts," generally speaking. Embedded systems, context-aware sensors, fun stuff like that. I'd really like to apply to that program, but I don't have the money now. If I continue living at home and work a support-world job for a couple of years, I could probably save the cash, but all the support-world jobs I've found are in DC, and I'm far enough out that I'd really like to move downtown so the commute won't be miserable. If I do that, however, I'm out the cost of rent (probably $1000/month) which makes saving for grad school much harder.

I just interviewed for a nice IT position. Pay's nice, benefits are nice, but.. I'm really frightened that if I get offered it and take it, I'll lose something of my ability to chase those dreams. I know that I'm not chasing them now, though, so I'm not sure..

So, what's the intelligent way to figure out what I should do in this situation? I feel like I'm too wrapped up in it to really evaluate what I should do.. I know I have to make those decisions myself, but strategies for not being completely overwhelmed would be nice..

I know this is sort of a discombobulated question, but, any mefi-ites who survived the quarter-life crisis and have advice about finding your way and not going crazy, I'd love to hear from you.

posted by Alterscape to work & money (15 answers total)

I'd suggest thinking about how long you can stick it out in the IT field, if you can hack it long enough to save up for a move to a bigger city to persue film work. Assuming it's what you really want to do for the next season of your life. If you're living with parents, it follows you should be able to save up some money. Of course, I'm struggling with similar questions about "the rest of my life" too, so my advice may not be of any worth.
posted by glip at 6:37 PM on December 4, 2006

If you are serious about saving money for grad school, rather than pay for an overpriced studio consider getting a room in a group house (find listings via D.C.'s Craigslist page or Washington City Paper's classified "shared housing" section). There are hordes of people our age (early/mid twenties) living in houses all over NW and Capitol Hill, so you probably won't have to look that hard. You should be able to find a room downtown for far less than $1000.
posted by hazelshade at 6:43 PM on December 4, 2006

I am just throwing in a couple more ideas for you to think about - by the way, even if you pick job A right now, you can pick another one a few years from now or even a completely different career track - remember that and perhaps it will minimize your anxiety over this decision.

Anyway, for your anxiety regarding saving money for grad school - have you looked into some of these programs and how students are funded? Many grad programs in the sciences pay your tuition/and a stipend - I did not pay a penny for my graduate degree. See if you can find out this info for your graduate program, that may take away some of the anxiety.

Does this new job (or other IT jobs) offer a tuition benefit? (Typically 2 or 3 free classes/year?) If so, you can take a graduate level course and see if you truly enjoy the info and want to pursue more classes at a later point.

Finally, it sounds like you are very creative and want to try jobs/activities related to that - can you try small freelance or part-time gigs related to this on the side? That would also further answer your question as to whether you want to pursue this for many more years, provide you with experience, and start you on the path towards...where you want to go next.

Also, I would view whatever job you take as not just money, but a place to acquire skills towards whatever you want to do next/so don't view it as a loss.

Good luck!
posted by Wolfster at 6:50 PM on December 4, 2006

Alterscape, I definitely hear ya. I graduated 2005 with a degree in English Literature ("So, you wanna be a teacher?"), but found that there were very few places offering to pay me to sit around and read novels. A lot of my friends got entry level corporate jobs, and looking around facebook it looks like a lot of people from my class are engaged/married. And most of them are still living in their hometown. Not that this is a bad thing. I think a lot of them are probably happy.

But boy, that would definitely not make me happy. I went traveling. Lived in Ireland, Scotland, camped in the Czech Republic for a couple of months, took weekend holidays. I was working bad jobs in hospitality or through temp agencies and I made no more money than I started out with, but boy was I happy. Now I am home for a while, living very cheaply (also with the 'rents), and saving up enough money to move to DC in a couple of months. My plan is to CouchSurf for a while (or maybe look into seeing if there are cheap boarding rooms or hostels?) until I find a room in an apartment. Then I'll look for a job.

Then, there's my cousin, who's in a master's program in London. He worked in a field he really liked for a few years (making very little money) and then decided to go to grad school. He's really into it, totally immersed, learning a lot, and will be able to get a much better job in a field he loves when he finishes. But the other students in his class, a lot of them are straight out of college. Very unfocused, not sure it's what they really want to do. He says he's so happy he waited until he knew he wanted to do this and had some good contacts so that he could get a good job.

I guess maybe what I'm trying to say (and haven't said yet), is that you and I are in a great position. We don't have a lot of responsibilities (kids, mortgage, etc) and we have a lot of freedom. There is no reason you have to take a "real job" because you feel like you have to. If you want to, definitely do it. But there are tons of other options. Think of a place you really want to live, and move there. Think of something you've always wanted to try and try it. Maybe a part time unpaid internship at a studio in LA while you're cheffing at Applebees. There are so many options.

I can't tell you whether or not you'd feel tied down by a real job. A lot of my friends seem to feel that way. Some of the people I met traveling had had a real job, got really sick of it, quit, and packed a backpack. One had been living in Italy for four years as a hostel clerk and laundrette attendant. He eventually learned Italian after a couple of years and still doesn't have a visa.

I feel like I'm venting some frustration here, so I apologise. But I feel like I see so many people get tied down to a job they kind of like but not really, and then they sign a lease, get a dsl subscription, buy a couch. Then they feel stuck. Like they can't move. But they had so much freedom! They are so young! They had so many choices, and they settled for something that doesn't really make them happy.

It sounds (to me, at least, perhaps I'm reading myself into it), that your guy is saying you don't want to take this IT job. That maybe you would be much happier pursuing some kind of creative/film work. Creative/film work is hard to get. But it's what you really want to do. Figure out a way you can do it. Unpaid part time internship, hobby, very entry level position. If you really want to go to this program, make the decision that that's what you're going to do and figure out what it's gonna take. Decide to take the job with the view that in two years, after saving x amount of money each month, you WILL quit. In the mean time, work on your portfolio a lot.

So, discombobulated advice for a discombobulated question. But here is one vote for embracing the freedom that you have and making the most of it. Doing what you really love. Making it work somehow. It might not always be glamourous, but at least you'll know you're on a track that you like, not one that makes you worry.
posted by mosessis at 6:54 PM on December 4, 2006

Why would you lose the ability to chase your dreams? You can ALWAYS quit your job if an opportunity arises. There is no such thing as an unbreakable employment contract in the US anymore, that was outlawed during the civil war.

Find a group house. You will end up saving money on the commute, plus your mental health.

You said it yourself though, this is a quarter-life "crisis." You have a lot of life ahead of you. Your decisions today are not, in the long run and final outcome, going to make that much difference. We've all been there or are there or will be there. Don't stress, you need work to eat, pay rent, etc. don't feel like you are sealed into your job for a lifetime just because you take one lousy entry-level gig for a couple of years before grad-school or that choice internship or whatever the next step will be.
posted by Pollomacho at 6:55 PM on December 4, 2006

Quarter-life crisis survivor here (you can look at my past questions to get an idea of the extent of my confusion).

My advice: don't look to anonymous internet Q & A sites to answer the question of what to do with your life. However, it is a good place to assist in brainstorming.

Since it sounds like you haven't actually made a decision yet about what path to pursue, I would suggest you buy What Color Is Your Parachute?

But be warned, I discovered that an entire industry has formed to take advantage of people in your position, giving half-assed, overgeneralized advice under the guise of "helping you find your mission". I found Parachute to have the most concise and effective techniques, and most other books and websites are merely derivatives of this book.

It will cover everything from figuring out what you might like to pusue to giving you methods to following through and doing it.

You'll be fine.
posted by Idiot Mittens at 6:57 PM on December 4, 2006 [1 favorite]

Try looking into entry-level jobs (or internships) at TV/film production or post-production places. I thought that pretty much all of those positions needed previous hands-on editing experience or deep technical knowledge or whatever, but there are many, many things that need to get done. I'm currently working at a TV network in Silver Spring, and I had absolutely no experience in the field (other than film theory blah blah papers I wrote in college) before I went in; it was just a matter of keeping my eyes open, and finding positions where they were willing to train on-the-fly.

For example, at a post-production house, you probably won't be able to jump right in as a top editor, but they might need someone to file and send out tapes. You might not be able to immediately start pitching documentary ideas at a TV station, but maybe the scheduling department needs some extra hands. It probably won't immediately satisfy your desire/need to do creative work, but it will earn you the most important thing needed in that field: networking contacts.
posted by sarahsynonymous at 6:58 PM on December 4, 2006

Move to LA, get into VFX. There are a lot of entry-level IT positions that feed into interesting, creative work that will be right up your alley.
posted by milinar at 7:43 PM on December 4, 2006

I think you should save up enough money to quit your job and have a wild adventure while you're still young. Move to a strange city, drive across country, visit another country, take a risk. There comes a time when you'll be too tied down to do these things, and you'll risk it. And adventure is a great way to re-connect with your values and discover what your real priorities should be.
posted by croutonsupafreak at 7:44 PM on December 4, 2006

DC has a bit of video editing and stuff where film experience may come in handy. It might be worth checking out Discovery Channel in Silver Spring - possibly where sarahsss is.

Apply for lots of stuff, maybe go to conferences (maybe SIGGRAPH?) and apply for jobs there too.
posted by sien at 9:21 PM on December 4, 2006

advice from someone who has been in different industries and gone through this all several times:

no matter what you're doing...whether a steambarge in india or an it job in the DC suburbs...make your CV look like you have been developing a skill set.

This could be that you took classes at regular intervals to develop in an area...or you created a webpage that took off.

this doesnt mean that you have to settle down in one job and go forward..quite the contary. you can go all over the place, but they dont have to know that.

i remember reading..may have been in the parachute book...that when you change careers you should either change (1) your position or (2) your field. I.e. if you are a webdesigner and you want to be in HR you become a webdesigner for an HR company and then move from there.
posted by BigBrownBear at 11:44 PM on December 4, 2006

You don't understand. It's Los Angeles. We need you here. You'll be welcomed with open arms. We've got lots of booze. Sunny Decembers. Plenty of open roads that only occasionally pile up with traffic. And if you like plastic, then you haven't experienced beauty like the plastic beauty here.

I kid. C'mon out to Los Angeles. Join us. Give it a go. I vote for take the shitty job for a year, save up the cash, live at home, tough it out, and then come out to LA. We pay as well as jobs in New York, there are actually jobs to be had here, and rent isn't 45 billion dollars a month.

Oh, yeah, and today? 77 degrees.

Just sayin'.
posted by incessant at 1:08 AM on December 5, 2006

Move to LA, get into VFX.

Do this. Seriously. Or get into VFX, move to LA. Whatever.

There's plenty of IT work in the film/video industry, especially as digital intermediate and d-cinema continue to grow. Now's the time.

And yeah, it's like 77 outside and I can see the beach.
posted by dogwalker at 7:44 AM on December 5, 2006

I'm in Toronto and in a similar situation. I would say figure out why you're moving before you move.
posted by sid at 8:57 AM on December 5, 2006

Agreed with an earlier poster. A apartment in DC won't cost you 1000/month - not on the lower end at least. You can find studios for lower 800s in the city itself, not to mention a bit lower in Arlington and Silver Spring, etc. And you should be able to find a room in a group house for far less. I have friends paying no more than 500/month - but up to 700/month is reasonable too.

I feel like I really don't know enough to comment about this, but I do have a friend in film school here (who is planning to stay here),and he did say that the nonprofit world here (National Geographic, other nonprofits like that) does have a significant need for film people - so the needs there, even if it isnt the type of work in LA or NYC.

That said,youonly live once - so if going to LA is what's best, go! Take this opp to live at home and save money, and when you have enough, head out west!
posted by jare2003 at 6:28 AM on December 7, 2006