Are these style clothes "weird"?

November 17, 2006 9:32 PM

I'm finding myself liking punkish/gothic/emo type clothes (I never have before), such as Criminal Damage's "Hook Trench" and "Military Jacket" coats. Is this acceptable for wearing-around clothes, or just too "weird" for most people? I'd like input on this, since it's all rather new to me.

I actually purchased the Hook Trench coat as part of a Halloween costume. But I found that I quite liked the style and cut--it feels much more dressy to me than even a traditional suit, and I certainly feel more natural in it. I'm certainly not gothic, emo, punk, or anything of the sort by nature, though...

That being said, is this socially a good idea? Or will people look at me as a poser or perhaps a lost cosplayer?

...I guess what I'm looking for here is input on this, and suggestions about online retailers, etc., things that follow this sort of military/futuristic design.

posted by Phyltre to clothing, beauty, & fashion (32 comments total)

Should have included a link here, sorry. The trench I was referring to is third on this page: here
posted by Phyltre at 9:35 PM on November 17, 2006 [1 favorite]

This?

I think what you have to understand is that by wearing these clothes, you're sending a visual signal to those around you that you identify with the culture that has adopted these clothes as part of its identity. If that's not a signal that you're comfortable sending, then don't wear this stuff.

This signal is going to be interpreted differently by different groups. People who belong to the culture aligned with these clothes are certainly going to see you as a "poseur," and may even react with hostility to what they perceive as an outsider trying to appropriate their cultural property. People outside the goth culture are probably either going to be confused by the subtleties of your appearance (he's wearing that coat, and yet his hair is a normal color... hmmm) or are going to write you off as a goth-type.

Personally, I think this is a bad idea. But then, I'm part of a generation whose tendency to express identity through dress and to maintain rigid subcultural boundaries has been well-documented. Gen-Xers may have a different view.
posted by chickletworks at 9:46 PM on November 17, 2006

I think you should wear what you like and feel comfortable in. Create your own style and rock it.

I don't think any roving gangs of possessive goths will track you down and demand to see your membership card.
posted by loiseau at 9:53 PM on November 17, 2006 [1 favorite]

I'll try linking again, but this time to my actual costume:

HERE

I failed to give the link text last time, lol.
posted by Phyltre at 10:10 PM on November 17, 2006

It looks pretty weird and you will stand out, so if that bothers you then don't wear that sort of stuff.
posted by Falconetti at 10:23 PM on November 17, 2006

It doesn't look like normal street wear. It looks like a deliberate choice, a costume, a "statement".

Some people will like the statement ("hey, there's a guy who probably likes the same music/kind of sex/culture that I like, cool coat"; "hey, that guy marches to his own beat"), some people won't ("hey, there's a guy who probably listens to terrible music/ likes perverted stuff/is a weirdo"; "hey, there's a guy who's trying to be [goth/whatever] but isn't quite pulling it off"). People will interpret this clothing as meaning certain things about you, and you'll get different treatment based on that. But of course, this is true of any clothing.

If you're in a large city, you'll be fine on the street and a bit out of place in an office or certain shops. If you're in a smaller town, you'll probably stand out quite a bit more on the street -- so more attention, good and bad. If it's a conformist or violent town, bad attention will be more costly to you.

Unless you are in a violent town, or have a particular reputation that you must maintain for professional reasons, give it a shot and see if you're comfortable with the kind of reaction you get. You can always stop if you don't like it.

If you're just a middle-of-the-road, normal guy, who wears khakis and button-up shirts, works in an office, likes to watch game shows, etc, it's going to seem out of place on you -- like you're trying too hard, or looking for something that's missing in your life, or like you have a confused self-concept. You'd need to have a bit more stylishness to make this work; it needs to fit into a pattern of deliberate clothing choices you're making. It will look weird if you have this very idiosyncratic piece on top of a bunch of stuff that's just the default uniform.

Also remember that it's ok to love an article of clothing or a style even though you can't pull it off in everyday wear.
posted by LobsterMitten at 10:40 PM on November 17, 2006

is this socially a good idea

No.

things that follow this sort of military/futuristic design.

Here, I gotta ask: why? You're not in the military and you aren't from the future.

I'd find anyone wearing such an outfit very hard to take serious in any context, personal or social.

That said, take my opinion with a grain of salt. I find people who wear camoflauge clothing to be ridiculous because I think anyone who would try and turn army/military clothing into a fashion statement laughable.

I can't remember who wrote it but there's a line: "You wear camoflauge because you want to be noticed." Pretty much sums up my thoughts on the linked clothing, but, you know, without the unintended irony.

Most will disagree but if you're a man, unless you've got the looks or attitude to back it up, the only "clothing" you should really go extreme on (if you feel it necessary to go extreme) are shoes and eyeglasses. They're things you wear most of the time so having unique pairs becomes part of your style or perceived personality. One weird shirt or pair of pants or whatever just stands out as not being you. Unless it is you and you wear the style daily, in which case you probably wouldn't be asking this question.
posted by dobbs at 11:33 PM on November 17, 2006 [1 favorite]

I'm certainly not gothic, emo, punk, or anything of the sort by nature, though...


Hmm. How sure are you sure about that?

Anyway wear what you want as long as it won't hurt your job. Perhaps you're beginning to sprout a little gothic appendage. (Who knows how long it will grow?)
posted by washburn at 12:24 AM on November 18, 2006

In my experience, just about anything "out of the norm" will get you funny looks for six months or so. Assuming you deal with the same people every day, and you're consistent with your style, after that most of them will no longer even notice it.

I'm female, and I've worn camoflauge army pants (eat it, dobbs :) and one or another heavy/death/black metal band t-shirt every day for about 10 years now. People rarely say anything about it -- on the order of once or twice a year -- but I'll get three or four comments a day if I happen to be wearing "normal" bizcasfri-style clothes for once. That is to say, it's not "weird" style that gets you noticed in daily life as much as it is anything that's different from what you usually wear. Once you get through the initial period of change and people have seen you around town a couple of times, you're golden, so long as you look confident and natural in what you wear. And, in my experience... call it politeness or call it chickenshit, but most people won't actually say or do something about it even if they're offended by what you're wearing, so what does their opinion matter? Unless you're climbing the corporate ladder or you live on the wrong side of the tracks in Random Beat-Down Town, that coat is unlikely to be your ultimate downfall.

If you really feel comfortable and confident in your jacket, and you can work it into your style, wear the jacket. Just be prepared to take a small amount of flak every once in a while until people are used to it (and, thereafter, when moving in unfamiliar territory.) I know lots of people with odd style points -- the "wears goggles as an accessory" guy, the "big pants" guy, the "super future Tokyo style" girl, some "wacky facial hair" guys, etc. They get by just fine: for the most part, people are either into it, or they sort of scratch their heads and go with it. If you can live with the idea of being the "Matrix coat" guy, for better or for worse, then go for it!
posted by vorfeed at 12:31 AM on November 18, 2006

You'll get fewer looks if you don't button … err, toggle it up.

I say go for it. Sounds like you haven't done a lot of fashion exploration. I think of it like sex. If it feels good (and doesn't hurt anybody, natch) go for it. And keep going for it. Try related things. Try unrelated things. Go shopping with friends who are up for exploration. Keep your eye out for people whose look you like and take notes.

I can think of lots of ways that this coat would work in outfits that don't necessarily scream emo/goth/etc.etc. Just keep trying things until you find clothes that feel right to you. And post more photos! (I heart FashionFilter!)
posted by wemayfreeze at 12:54 AM on November 18, 2006

Is it a good idea? As long as you like it. It certainly isn't hurting anyone else, and if people socially shun you because of your choice of clothes, were they really worthwhile to begin with? Is it going to make you look like a poseur or cosplayer? I doubt it, particularly not if it's the only punk/goth/whatever thing you wear. It may look odd, initially, if it's the only "alternative" item of clothing that you own [n.b. "alternative" doesn't have to be punk/goth], but eventually people you care about start paying more attention to you than your clothing [as long as you behave as if you're comfortable with what you're wearing.]

A fair amount of what I wear could be construed as punk/goth, although much of it is mixed with very mundane stuff [T-shirts from bands or organizations, etc.] Some of it is military [and, as vorfeed says, suck it if you don't think non-military people can wear military clothes - the military surplus stuff I own primarily because it is cheap, simple, and very, very sturdy.] At a certain point, I made a conscious decision to wear what I do: it is comfortable, it is practical [lots of pockets, very durable], and it makes me happy. If you want to, you can make a similar decision: decide how you really want to look, put up with the stressful process of starting to look that way, and then end up feeling comfortable with the new way you look [and the new way people respond to you.]

Wearing that coat is not going to cause people to shun you. Between my clothing, visible piercings, and dyed/oddly cut hair, I certainly look... different, if not necessarily identifiably a member of a given subculture. However, I've never had problems in shops or at lab because of it [although I do live in a large and liberal city]. If anything, I get treated better than I used to be treated - I'm both recognizeable and very polite. I get a lot of compliments [few from peers, surprisingly], and at worst generally get ignored. The only overtly rude responses that I've gotten in the past four or five years have been from a handful of fairly elderly people who apparently considered piercings/oddly colored hair a personal affront. In those instances, I felt far more embarassed for their bad and public behaviour than for my appearance [appropriate, albeit with non-traditional hair.] I feel comfortable with how I look and I treat others very politely, and in response I find that I am treated very well. As long as you feel comfortable and are willing to put up with more scrutiny than you're used to, at least initially, go for it.

[Seriously: at this point, you're just looking at wearing a coat. If you don't like the attention you get, you can stop wearing it.]
posted by ubersturm at 1:31 AM on November 18, 2006 [1 favorite]

I don't think most people know what 'cosplay' is. You'll just look like another freak who likes to wear a costume on a daily basis. Not that you are, or it's necessarily a bad thing, but I think that's an attitude you'll face, wearing a coat such as the one pictured.

Frankly, emo/goth culture is viewed as.. ridiculous by many people. So three's another risk of being written off, no because you're perceived as wierd, but because you're not worth it.

If it's just random strangers you'll never see again and don't interact with, this may not matter. But I wouldn't wear a coat like that while eating alone at Denny's in rural, southern Ohio.
posted by unmake at 1:52 AM on November 18, 2006

While I personally think that the coat looks really quite smashing, I don't think it's a very good idea to wear it on a daily basis. It's difficult enough for people who actually are part of the relevant subculture/lifestyle to pull this off, so it will be almost impossible for you if you don't actually identify with it.
posted by richardh at 2:29 AM on November 18, 2006

Wear what you like. There's nothing particularly weird about that coat -- depending on the weather.
posted by robcorr at 2:42 AM on November 18, 2006

From the picture, I would just assume you really like The Matrix, The Borg, or Dark City, if worn in everyday life, or just have a thing for elaborate dress. I'd definitely think "geek" rather than "cool", but towards the end of the geek spectrum where people are gloriously uninhibited about what they wear. I'm usually impressed by such peoples' self-assurance, regardless of whether they can actually pull the clothes off or not, so go for it...
posted by Jon Mitchell at 3:24 AM on November 18, 2006 [1 favorite]

Most will disagree but if you're a man, unless you've got the looks or attitude to back it up, the only "clothing" you should really go extreme on (if you feel it necessary to go extreme) are shoes and eyeglasses.

I disagree. Life's too short not to look how you want to look. If you feel the desire to wear it, wear it.
posted by jonmc at 6:43 AM on November 18, 2006

Actually, based on my shallow perusal of fashion mags, it looks to me like the military look is coming back in--from what I remember, a lot of designers had far more ornate coats in their winter collections. And from living in a land of very "fashionable" people, I can tell you that a lot of looking good is very close to looking ugly but in both cases it is vastly superior to middle of the road (all khakis should be burnt as far as I'm concerned). So wear the jacket you like. Shop for some clothes you like to go with it. (I'd probably do black pants, emo sweater, coat untoggled and collar open, but do whatever you like.) Weird is only bad to people who are lame.
posted by dame at 6:45 AM on November 18, 2006

I think anyone who would try and turn army/military clothing into a fashion statement laughable.

When I was 14, I bought a field jacket at a surplus store. I had a serious obsession with the Vietnam War at the time, so I guess that was part of it. I was a metal/stoner kid, all my friends wore leather MC's or Levi's jackets, so maybe I wanted to be a little different. I got backstage at a Metallica show and Jason & Lars signed it. So I started getting other celebs I dug to sign it. It's got quite the collection now. It is the coolest jacket in the world.

My point being, you can make just about anything work for you with the right attitude, even something somebody finds laughable, which backs up my previous assertion: wear what you want.
posted by jonmc at 6:52 AM on November 18, 2006

Guys who wear coats that touch the ground think they look like a heavy dude from The Matrix or some character from a comic book we’ve never heard of, but they just look like some guy who’s really into The Matrix and some comic book we’ve never heard of.

...

He HAS to wear that retarded coat...He bought it in '96 for $395 at Kenneth Cole and told himself "would I pay $1 a day to wear this coat for a year? Yes I would!" But it's 10 years later and he's not even close to paying it off.

...

i have come to the conclusion that this is an actual genetic breed. i work with a guy from trinidad who never had a tv or computer. he grew eating roadkill (no joke). anyway, he has the shaved around the bottom of the head with pony tail on top thing going on. i fucking hate it. i break his balls about it everyday. one day i asked him if he was into swords, long coats and the matrix, and with a straight face he looked at me and said of course.

posted by Human Flesh at 8:32 AM on November 18, 2006

Wear it, but prepare to be labelled. Previously you were just "normal guy", not really standing out, now you'll be "weirdo coat guy". If you're ok with that, then go for it.
posted by blue_beetle at 8:45 AM on November 18, 2006

Wear it, but prepare to be labelled. Previously you were just "normal guy", not really standing out, now you'll be "weirdo coat guy".

You'd be amazed at how quickly people get used to 'weird looks.' I was in the East Village in the summer, and a dude was walking down the street wearing only a cowboy hat, boot, a speedo and a sign around his neck saying 'I Love Cock.' Very few people even looked.
posted by jonmc at 8:59 AM on November 18, 2006

Cheap polyester Goth looks terrible. Good quality stuff looks Vivienne Westwood. You want the latter look.

If you want to be a bit less conspicuous, don't fasten the toggles. And make sure it's ironed and looks neat, not like something fresh out of the plastic bag from the sale shelf of Hot Topic.
posted by casarkos at 11:29 AM on November 18, 2006

There's a girl I've seem come into the bookstore I work at who wears a fitted-jacket-style version of that—similar hook clasps, but cropped, not long. It looks amazing.

I think coats like this are definitely fair game, esp. if you're young, regardless of whether you're "punk/emo" yourself.

Then again, I (female, 22) wear a double-breasted, tailored gray wool man's military coat that goes down to my ankles—so what do I know?
posted by limeonaire at 12:38 PM on November 18, 2006

You may be able to moderate the weirdness with some standard accessories. I have a long coat that's pretty striking, but risks making me look like someone who hopes that a trenchcoat will make them look imposing, so I generally wear it with things to provide a different context, eg briefcase and umbrella for a businesswear context.

In your case, I think the contrasting silver clasps will cause some serious unwanted pidgeonholing that is hard to escape. OTOH, the clasps look good. So... options... perhaps you could find similar clasps at a craft/fabric store, buy a replacement set, go to a gun store and buy some blueing agent, and thus make a set of black clasps, that will be less obvious and so perhaps less pidgeonholing.
posted by -harlequin- at 1:48 PM on November 18, 2006

Also, if you're going to wear a coat as dressy, the rest of the package should match - expensive dress shoes, fitted pants, etc. This may not help, but at least it avoids the alternative which hurts - unusual coat with cheap/normal clothes suggests that you're all about the coat, which confirms the negative pidgeonholes people descibe above.
posted by -harlequin- at 1:57 PM on November 18, 2006

I'd just figure you were a geek in the D&D, Linux, Dr. Who, Reny mode who probably didn't spend a lot of time in the company of women.

But who cares what anyone else thinks? I don't stand out here, I do when I visit my parents city though. Doesn't concern me what people think of me just by how I look. Actually, the only thing that does bother me is when I wear my flight and people think I'm some racist skin. Go for it! It's kind of a neat jacket.
posted by DieHipsterDie at 2:26 PM on November 18, 2006

I think loud fashion statements and "look at me" clothing screams immaturity. People, in general, won't hate you or be confused by you they'll just think of you as a kid.

Also, ask yourself how you want to communicate with others. With your clothing or with your mouth? I think entering the world of 'hipster' clothing is something of a character flaw. An interesting and creative flaw but definitely one that says, "I need more attention than most people" or "I'm different than you and Im going out of my way to tell you that."
posted by damn dirty ape at 3:22 PM on November 18, 2006

I too shallowly peruse fashion mags, and yes, the pseudo military look is hot right now. The cut of the coat is nice but the fasteners scream "Hot Topic"- they're somehow too small, shiny, and cheap looking. If I were you I'd lose the ones on the shoulder and get some crafty person to change the other ones to something heavier and sturdier. Or to something altogether different like sleek black toggles. I think it's entirely possible to wear non-mainstream stuff IF it appears well-made of high quality materials. Pair up your 'odd' things with very traditional basics.
posted by oneirodynia at 5:37 PM on November 18, 2006

You should absolutely wear that coat, and wear it with pride if you feel comfortable in it and if you think it reflects some aspect of your personality.

In fact, relish that you are secure enough with who you are and your own sense of style and taste that you don't have to smugly put down anyone who doesn't blindly follow whatever fashions are deemed respectable for "normal" people this year.

I didn't realize how righteous and offended some people still get about other people's clothing choices until this thread. I look around at my coworkers in the graphics department of a very large, very well respected and (oh, how I wish it weren't so) very *conservative* daily newspaper, and I realize that all of them are making far more egregious and unforgivably immature (!!) fashion decisions than just a humble matrix-y hot-topic-y trench coat.

Egads! The lunatics have taken over the corporate asylum!

As far as acceptance goes should your sartorial choices fall outside the mainstream, in my own experience my unforgivable sin of having never shaken an early interest in underground and thrift shop fashion hasn't been a barrier to respect in the "real world", even as I'm settling into middle age. It has, however, served as a decent barrier against extended social contact with shallow, insecure, status-conscious and judgmental people.

So, you wear it, you win!
posted by stagewhisper at 6:05 PM on November 18, 2006 [1 favorite]

You like the coat, wear the coat.

Some of the comments in this thread show that others will judge you for what you wear. This will be true no matter how you dress, so wear the coat. And anything else you want to wear.
posted by Pallas Athena at 11:43 AM on November 19, 2006

I like the coat.

I wear clothes like that. I'm not goth/emo/punk, though I go to their parties 3 or 4 times a year. I have friends who have a more pronounced goth-like style and I do take cues from how they look, but I incorporate the stuff I like in my own style. Sometimes people ask me if I'm a goth even though I'm just wearing jeans and have blonde hear and no make-up, because I wear a long leather coat and a shirt with some buckles or rivets on it. If they do I smile and say no. Nope. No goth, no punk girl, no rivethead. I just really like what I'm wearing.

Go for it, perhaps just don't wear it to work if your employer doesn't like it. Or, you know, get another job where people think more liberally.
posted by Skyanth at 11:46 AM on November 19, 2006

I agree with oneirodynia, above.

Either buy or have one built (seamstress in the Yellow Pages) that fits better(Not so tight across the chest) , has better quality clasps (Those look like dog-chain clips) and uses a heavier fabric that will drape better. Maybe chain-weight the lower hem so it has a bit of swing when you move. Simplicity pattern #5386 might be a good starting point if you want one built.
posted by Orb2069 at 3:13 PM on November 19, 2006