"We'll just have to see about that, sport."

October 12, 2006 8:28 PM

I'm in search of more classic chummy/fatherly nicknames (sport, champ) to throw about with my S.O., what've you got?

My boyfriend and I frequently indulge in calling each other those weird, vaguely patronizing or fatherly nicknames: champ, tiger, chief, etc. I'm a fan of these types of nicknames, in contexts like:

"Whoa, cool it down there, champ."
or
"I'll catch you later, tiger."

Mostly we're both amused by the absurdity here -- they're out of context and a little over the top to begin with (tiger??). I'm looking for more names like this, because I feel like my bag of tricks is pretty empty.

If you have any similarly absurd yet NOT SYRUPY (read: shnookums, hunny-bunny-lover) terms of endearment, you get bonus points. Think classics like dollface, etc.

posted by dorothy humbird to grab bag (115 comments total)

Ace.
posted by frogan at 8:30 PM on October 12, 2006

Sparky.
posted by frogan at 8:31 PM on October 12, 2006

Squirt
Bunky
posted by jrossi4r at 8:33 PM on October 12, 2006

Scooter, Kiddo, Sport, Killer
posted by Rubber Soul at 8:35 PM on October 12, 2006

Boss.
posted by zoinks at 8:35 PM on October 12, 2006

Jack, Pal, Buddy, Sam, Bub, Spike, Sport.

All names that, with the addition of Ace as mentioned above, my dad used to call us when we were little girls. I think he may have wanted a son.
posted by padraigin at 8:37 PM on October 12, 2006 [1 favorite]

My dad always called me Hot Shot.
posted by PhatLobley at 8:37 PM on October 12, 2006

Buddy.
posted by hollygoheavy at 8:38 PM on October 12, 2006

Tough guy.
Big guy.
posted by JekPorkins at 8:38 PM on October 12, 2006

Kiddo
Babe
Mon/Ma Petit(e) Chou
S/he Who Must Be Obeyed (from Rumpole of the Bailey)
posted by Quietgal at 8:38 PM on October 12, 2006

Damn! I didn't preview-padraigin beat me to Buddy.
posted by hollygoheavy at 8:39 PM on October 12, 2006

"Friend", but the inflection has to be right - a certain element of sarcasm.

"Cuz"? or "Bro"? Too incestuous?
posted by zoinks at 8:39 PM on October 12, 2006

Skip
posted by BentPenguin at 8:42 PM on October 12, 2006

"Pilgrim."
About two-thirds of the way down on the linked page.
posted by zoinks at 8:42 PM on October 12, 2006

Old pal
Old sport
Old bean
Son-of-a-gun
Buster
Fella
Hombre
Big Daddy
posted by melissa may at 8:42 PM on October 12, 2006

Chief. Champ. Big 10-4. Mon Petit Fromage. Meine klein Klöße mit speck.
posted by oxford blue at 8:44 PM on October 12, 2006

Lil' Man
posted by k8t at 8:48 PM on October 12, 2006

Partner. Or pardner; as you see fit.
posted by transient at 8:51 PM on October 12, 2006

Pop
Buster
posted by matkline at 8:52 PM on October 12, 2006

Kiddo is awesome. ALso, last name.

"Come over here and gimme a hug, McGillicutty"
posted by Joseph Gurl at 8:57 PM on October 12, 2006

Doc. My roommate picked up this habit this summer, leaving him open to all sorts of weird responses ("wascawwy wabbit", "How the hell can I generate 1.21 gigawatts?", "IANAD", "no, pier", "duck goose"). No romantic overtones, but if you're just looking for nicknames ...
posted by spaceman_spiff at 9:00 PM on October 12, 2006 [1 favorite]

Mack

Names of tough guys from cops shows, cowboy movies.
posted by winston at 9:00 PM on October 12, 2006

Cap'n.
posted by escabeche at 9:06 PM on October 12, 2006

Hoss, Cap(tain), Kemosabe
posted by SBMike at 9:08 PM on October 12, 2006 [1 favorite]

Son, Bubba (both may require specific intonations)
posted by dilettante at 9:13 PM on October 12, 2006

Per the great after-play dinner scene in Rushmore: "guy," "curly" and "dog."
posted by flod at 9:17 PM on October 12, 2006

Meathead, knucklehead, chucklehead.
posted by loquax at 9:17 PM on October 12, 2006

Compadre.
posted by transient at 9:22 PM on October 12, 2006

Since all the classics have been mentioned, how about some hip-hop flavor? I like "son" and, of course, "dawg" is essential.

Someone else mentioned it, but I also like "bro" and variations thereof (brah, broheim, broseph, etc..).
posted by mullacc at 9:31 PM on October 12, 2006

Hahaaha, mullacc-- the bf already finds "broseph" insanely amusing, or at least did one night, under the influence of certain substances. All of your input thus far has been great, and in some cases (meathead) remind me happily of my actual childhood (during which I was also "squirrel bait").

Any takers for endearments?
posted by dorothy humbird at 9:38 PM on October 12, 2006

Junior
Chief
Little Guy
Big Guy

My dad used to call me 'asshole'...in a loving way...seriously.
posted by ASM at 9:41 PM on October 12, 2006

Bucko, Broseph, Bub, Slugger, Tex, Slim
posted by viachicago at 9:42 PM on October 12, 2006

What about more left-field nicknames? Out of all context? Stretch, Sarge, Schnozz, Salty, Pepper, Toots, Boyo, Scooter, Doc, Smokey, Chuy, Big Dave, Bucky, Lucky, John Stamos?
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 9:43 PM on October 12, 2006 [1 favorite]

Actually, riffs on John are perfect, as his name is John. I'm waiting for the perfect moment to slip in "Johnny On the Spot" as he's notoriously lazy...

I like the direction you're going, Ambrosia.
posted by dorothy humbird at 9:46 PM on October 12, 2006

Sweetcheeks, Hotlips, Hon, Toots, Sugar
posted by Rubber Soul at 9:46 PM on October 12, 2006

My Dad always called me "pumpkin" (or rather: "punkin").
posted by web-goddess at 9:50 PM on October 12, 2006

Chubby.
Fatty.
Chippy.
Jimbo.
Lucky.
Four eyes.
Little camper.
Handsome.
Bonzo.
Moz.
Baldy.
You old bastard.
Jackass.
Jerky.
Buckaroo.
Bozo.
Joker.
posted by JekPorkins at 9:53 PM on October 12, 2006

- Chief (as opposed to chef)

- hoss (possibly an alternative to 'boss'? I haven't figured out which geographic area that inspires this - I've had scummy drug dealers in Iowa say it to a well-respected PhD principle investigator [who grew up in the NE USA] who's married to an MD [who gew up in metropolitan West coast])

- Maestro (notably, from 'Jazz' in the original Wing Commander)

- big guy (used rather too often referring to little kids to their faces)

- duderina/duderette/fellerina/fellerette (cv. Ned Flanders, The Simpsons)

- Mr (Mister)/Ms (Missus/Missy)

... and my personal <groan> -

child

as in...

me: is it wrong that I don't want to look at these slides because I'm afraid that the experiment didn't work?
resident-post-doc: Welcom to the "real world," child.
posted by porpoise at 9:53 PM on October 12, 2006

Origin of "Hoss:" Name of a character on Bonanza. Hoss Cartwright.
posted by JekPorkins at 9:56 PM on October 12, 2006

what like 20 answers and no one has suggested Guv'nah?
posted by joeblough at 9:57 PM on October 12, 2006

Hoss.
posted by emelenjr at 10:05 PM on October 12, 2006

Shorty
Slick
W.C. (since he's a John)
posted by rob511 at 10:12 PM on October 12, 2006

Comrade!
posted by xil at 10:23 PM on October 12, 2006

I've taken to calling my roommate by girls names, a la Dr. Cox from Scrubs.
posted by Keane at 10:42 PM on October 12, 2006

schmegeggy.

(thats what i got as a kid)
posted by Kifer85 at 10:50 PM on October 12, 2006

Fireball.
posted by OneOliveShort at 11:10 PM on October 12, 2006

Chester. (Generally in sarcastic context -- "Way to go, Chester.")
posted by rifflesby at 11:28 PM on October 12, 2006

We always loved to do adjective McAdjective.

e.g. Stinky McStinksalot.

also Susie McSadderton. etc.
posted by dentata at 11:30 PM on October 12, 2006 [2 favorites]

Old chap.

A la Jay Gatsby.
posted by roomwithaview at 11:37 PM on October 12, 2006

Allow me to second Mack. That's a good one.
posted by Burns Ave. at 12:23 AM on October 13, 2006

Governor. Pronounced "Guv'na", with a nod to our UK brethren.

I enjoy a good "Jim Bob" or "Sally", depending on the context.

Homie, g-dawg, and daddypants are all frequent flyers in my household, as well. Really, none of us refer to each other by our actual names. It's a good time.
posted by bedhead at 12:25 AM on October 13, 2006

I see someone has already suggested guv'nah. Oh, spelling. Also, I third or fourth or whatever the vote for 'Hoss'.
posted by bedhead at 12:28 AM on October 13, 2006

Speed (from the Odd Couple)
posted by gfrobe at 12:43 AM on October 13, 2006

Squire, mate(y), laddie, lassie, (young) fellow.
posted by misteraitch at 1:26 AM on October 13, 2006

Famous authors, as single name diminutives:

"Let's go, Kerouac."
"Great turn of phrase, Hemingway."
"I couldn't have said it bitchier, my good Parker."

Historical figures, on first name diminutives (tending to sarcastic):

"Thanks for your support, Benedict."
"Trust me, you killed, Lizzie."
"No, no, let me guess, Helen."
"I thought you led from strength, at every turn, Al."
"Speak for yourself, John."


One of my favorites in this vein, simply because of the negative connotations, one of which is still just lovable, is Casey. As in "Good try, Casey."

To get a point across, in acid tone, your reference has to be both broadly recognized, and utterly scurrilous. You say these things if you want to cut, so that the cut freshly bleeds for days, if not weeks. Nothin' but mean, for when you really mean, and those within earshot have some wit and knowledge.

"Your presence has been every bit the blessing we could have hoped of Typhoid Mary."
"You're as quick with a joke, as Jack, Our Ripper."
"Cake? No, thanks, my dear dauphine."

Sports offer fertile ground, and I'm surprised no one has offered:

Dizzy.
Lefty.
Yogi.
posted by paulsc at 1:34 AM on October 13, 2006

daddypants?! Hee! I'm so stealing that.
posted by Space Kitty at 1:39 AM on October 13, 2006

Here's some my friends throw about:
Tough guy, bad boy, duder, el duderino, wise guy, punk, mate, spa, clart, player, boss, joey, fella and homeslice!
posted by bhell13 at 1:53 AM on October 13, 2006

Borschtforbrains
posted by blue_wardrobe at 2:23 AM on October 13, 2006

Dutch.
posted by donpardo at 3:48 AM on October 13, 2006

Some Australianisms: Cobber, Digger

Or combine Cobber, Digger and Sport into CDS, pronounced "CeeDeeEss".
posted by claudius at 4:56 AM on October 13, 2006

Pet names I've never been called:
Bruiser, My Magnificent Mandingo, Mi Cubano Robusto, Ya big lug!, Il Duce.

Pet names I've had to endure:
Sport, Sonny-boy, Dr. Sarcasmo, Ese, Gringo, Muffin.
posted by horsewithnoname at 4:56 AM on October 13, 2006

I had a co-worker that called us all professional names - Esquire, Professor, Doctor, etc. with our real first names, which eventually got dropped. I always got Professor, so I took to calling him Mary Anne.
posted by blackkar at 5:54 AM on October 13, 2006

Peanut.
posted by JohnnyGunn at 5:56 AM on October 13, 2006

I've always liked one that I heard way back when LiquidTV was still on the air: "You Freaking Student !"

The daisy yelled it when his noggin was mistaken for a common flower. "That's my head, you freakin' student!"
posted by GreenTentacle at 5:57 AM on October 13, 2006

Polari would be an, er, interesting source for girlfriend to boyfriend nicknaming: Omi palone, meshingner palone, aspro, cartzo, chavie, dish, bona eek, bona lucoddy, bona colin, joggering omi...

Also, I love the Welsh word for 'love': cariad.

The best bet, though, is to go completely random, with an insulting edge: my ex/best mate and I have never had fixed nicknames for each other, so a phone call will start with 'Hello Piss Weasel!', 'Hello Rotgut!'. Other recent favourites: Salty Ovary, Grainy Chops, Little Big Fist, Pre-emptive, Weekly, Off Bun, Ham Dancer, Sweet Potato Cunt, Lonely Gladys, &c. In ten years, I don't think we've ever repeated a nickname...
posted by jack_mo at 6:05 AM on October 13, 2006

Mon Petit Fromage does that mean my little cheese?
posted by sandra194 at 6:08 AM on October 13, 2006

Salty Ovary?! Dude I am so using that. "Whaazamatta with you today? Got a salty ovary?"

Half-pint.
Papi Chulo.
I love this thread.
posted by mimi at 6:29 AM on October 13, 2006

My g/f's $.02: "Porkchop", "the boy wonder" and "sweet dick"
I call her "my little squirrel" when she's down.
posted by notsnot at 6:39 AM on October 13, 2006

Short pants.
posted by paleography at 7:12 AM on October 13, 2006

baño
posted by Stynxno at 7:13 AM on October 13, 2006

There was a made for TV movie back in the '80s written by Jean Shepherd called Ollie Hopnoodle's Haven of Bliss. One of the running gags was the dad in the movie had a bunch of odd nicknames for his son.

Unfortunately, the only one I remember is "Chainsaw".
posted by SteveInMaine at 7:21 AM on October 13, 2006

Mr. Man
posted by dorisfromregopark at 7:32 AM on October 13, 2006

Big-"D" <- his initial goes here. Some initials work better than others.
posted by flickroad at 7:32 AM on October 13, 2006

This is my favorite game!

I grew up in New England, and to this day my brother and I still both call people "Buck" or "Bucky" - you have to add a heavy Maine accent to it, though.

Also: chuckles, sucker, pops, son, cuz, buster, . Also old fashioned names like Chester.
posted by SassHat at 7:40 AM on October 13, 2006

Padawan?

((We use "pork chop" as well -- I thought that was just us.))
posted by The Bellman at 7:42 AM on October 13, 2006

McFly.
Forrest.
posted by catburger at 7:43 AM on October 13, 2006

Hee hee. McFly. Love it.
posted by The Bellman at 7:47 AM on October 13, 2006

Alfalfa, Buckwheat, Froggy, Porky, Spanky, Stymie, Waldo.
posted by Armitage Shanks at 8:23 AM on October 13, 2006

Zoog
Gov'na
posted by Attackpanda at 9:04 AM on October 13, 2006

(this might be potentially nauseau-inducing)

My dad used to call my brother and I "Ex-Lax", as in "Smooth move, Ex-Lax."

In company this became "Turtle-Wax", for propriety's sake.
posted by muddgirl at 9:13 AM on October 13, 2006

Sister.

a-la-John Wayne as Rooster Cogburn.

jack_mo: thanks for my first belly-laugh of the day.
posted by shifafa at 9:15 AM on October 13, 2006

Duke, Chachi, Tiger and Slugger are favorites for my boy.
posted by mike0221 at 9:26 AM on October 13, 2006

Lil' shaver
posted by electroboy at 9:27 AM on October 13, 2006

Johnny Suede, Johnny Guitar, Johnny Mnemonic, Johnny Clueless, Johnny Ace. . . . .
posted by muhonnin at 9:33 AM on October 13, 2006

Skeeter.
posted by jimfl at 9:40 AM on October 13, 2006

Oh man what about

Way to kick it in Pele.

We use that constantly in my circle
posted by PetiePal at 9:51 AM on October 13, 2006

Bunny. Pancake.
posted by casarkos at 9:53 AM on October 13, 2006

Zippy
Shecky
Sonny Jim
Pigpen
Private
Lieutenant
Colonel
Coach
Freckles
Mr. Wilson
posted by el-gregorio at 10:02 AM on October 13, 2006

A couple of Strong Bad ones, if that isn't a total turnoff:

Coolguy
B-Hand
posted by rxrfrx at 10:39 AM on October 13, 2006

Sugartits?
posted by SBMike at 10:42 AM on October 13, 2006

My wife and I also do this, and we use lots of random Irish names for some long-forgotten reason - McGillicutty, O'Shaughnessy, etc.
posted by sluggo at 10:45 AM on October 13, 2006

mushmouth
bugbreath
hoser
soldier
brigadier general
doggie
Sununu
repoman
Miro
buster
monsiouer
wink
Johnnie Darko
kid
Frank
Tommy John surgery

I second "asshole" (my ex-gf uses this as endearment ... seriously)

Richard Pryor's use of "jack" is incredible
My friends (a couple) call each other "dove"; use it if you want to gross out your friends.
posted by Aghast. at 10:45 AM on October 13, 2006

My dad used to do this. His favorite was "sports fan" (highly inappropriate if you knew me then, not much less inappropriate now). He also liked "kiddo."

When I do this with my friends I like "pal," "big guy," and "chief." Some enjoy calling me "J-Dogg."

The gf calls me "babe" almost exclusively. I don't deserve it.
posted by lackutrol at 11:20 AM on October 13, 2006

Oh, also "slick" and "jack."
posted by lackutrol at 11:21 AM on October 13, 2006

Flash
Gumby
Lord of the Dunce

I knew a guy who called everyone "Jackson". His wife called every male she knew "Big'un".

A slight touch of sarcasm could bring off such things as: my little ray of sunshine, my little bowl of moonbeams, fount of wisdom, hunka hunka burnin' love, Grand Poo-bah, He Who Must Be Ignored

In Steinbeck's The Winter of Our Discontent, the protagonist has multiple throwaway nicknames for his wife. My favorite is Flower Feet.

On preview: catburger sounds like a throwaway name, don't you think?
posted by forrest at 11:28 AM on October 13, 2006

forrest, I would be nothing but honoured if my username was used in such a manner :D
posted by catburger at 11:33 AM on October 13, 2006

You should watch (or re-watch) The Iron Giant. There's a great little montage where this G-Man is impersonating a father-figure and they just show him saying one hackneyed nickname after another.
posted by O9scar at 11:42 AM on October 13, 2006

I'm a big fan of Monkey.

And my SO calls me Pretty, and I call him Ugly.

There are also these classics:

Villain!
Scoundrel!
Rascal!

And, using the same tone of voice as with the above classics, you can make pretty much anything sound like an endearment/insult:

Scallop!
Tincture!
Ephedrine!
Poplar!
posted by inging at 12:40 PM on October 13, 2006

Oh, and Juice. As in, 'Slow down there, Juice.'

Actually, most breakfast food would work. Toast, Sausage, Oatmeal, StickyBuns.
posted by inging at 12:43 PM on October 13, 2006

Man, this is like hanging out with my husbands family. He calls me (and his female relatives) kid, kiddo, etc. constantly, and calls men boss, chief, and dude.

But the best is hearing his mother calling him Butch (I have yet to hear a specific origin for this one. And he's not a big, built-looking guy or anything).
posted by timepiece at 1:13 PM on October 13, 2006

Cochise
posted by fletchmuy at 2:08 PM on October 13, 2006

Turbo
posted by mnology at 2:25 PM on October 13, 2006

Dude
Holmes
Bud
Sweet Lou
Pips
Slim
Fanny
Sparky
Paco
Pepe
Paypay
Pedro
Mensa

Slappy (actually, almost anything that ends in 'y')
Goofy
Stinky
Sucky
Peety, etc.

Sometimes I work in some fake Pokemon names with my munchkins:
Stinkachu
Dorkapod
Slapatron, etc.
posted by claytonius maximus at 2:47 PM on October 13, 2006

Marbits
Benchpress
posted by rxrfrx at 3:55 PM on October 13, 2006

From The Lone Ranger and Tonto - 'Paleface'.
As in, the points where the Lone Ranger says things like, 'we're going to do X'.
Tonto's response is 'We, Paleface?'

Fred.
posted by lilithim at 5:35 PM on October 13, 2006

If you liked the Johnny series by muhonnin,

JohnnyGunn

or Shooter or Top Cat
posted by JohnnyGunn at 5:39 PM on October 13, 2006

After seeing lilithim's post, it reminded me that in high school we used to call people Derf (Fred spelled bakcwards.) No recollection why.
posted by JohnnyGunn at 5:41 PM on October 13, 2006

Slobodan
Slobo
Slobject
posted by rxrfrx at 5:43 PM on October 13, 2006

Chum.
Skipper
posted by eve harrington at 7:49 PM on October 13, 2006

My grandpa used to call me Skeezix.

Also: Mugsy.
posted by sixacross at 9:26 PM on October 13, 2006

Boss Hogg.
posted by joshuaconner at 12:24 AM on October 14, 2006

Great thread. My (brand new!) husband and I, during our courting phase, gruffly addressed each other by surname. Now we have the same surname it's even funnier.

Also, he's British, so I call him Guv'nor. And he calls me Treacle, which makes me grin like a fool every single time.
posted by hot soup girl at 8:37 AM on October 14, 2006

To add on to this one, how about:

Ak (as in, akbar)
God (if you're into that whole thing)
Hops
posted by rxrfrx at 11:36 AM on October 14, 2006

coolhandkadiddlehopper

Shooter

Doctor

Wingnut

Uvula

Tooly-high-harmony
posted by UncleHornHead at 9:46 PM on October 21, 2006

Whenever someone is seeming particularly excited: "Woah there, killer."
posted by ktheory at 8:23 PM on October 22, 2006