How to identify and articulate life goals

January 17, 2015 4:38 PM

My partner always says he doesn't have any particular goals in life, but it's clear that he does. He just hasn't identified or articulated them. Do you know a book, essay, website, etc. that could help him elucidate his image of what he wants for the future?

We've hit a point in our lives where it's suddenly become important to make active decisions so that, you know, they don't make themselves. It's health stuff and job stuff and other life stuff all coming to a head. I think my partner would be happy to go through some questions that would help him figure out where he wants to be going, but I don't know the questions to ask. I've googled to no avail. For example, this page basically just asks what your goals are. That's not useful, because if we could answer those questions...I wouldn't be here. This is more what I'm looking for, but more guidance would be great.

I read a book a couple years ago that led me through some exercises to help me figure out what career I actually wanted. Having a set of questions and so on to work through was shockingly useful. So that's why I was hoping there was something similar for life goals.

Your own set of questions is also welcome.

Finally, in case you're worrying, I'm definitely not going to try to sneak these questions in or force my partner to do anything. I'll just pass along the resources.

posted by kutsushita nyanko to Grab Bag (6 answers total)

You might try the book, Die Empty: Unleash Your Best Work Every Day. I read the first few chapters. The introduction was very inspirational and motivating, but the book declined in quality after that (in fairness, though, lots and lots of people on Amazon are giving it four or five stars).
posted by akk2014 at 5:14 PM on January 17, 2015 [1 favorite]

The general SMART goal model is one I find pretty helpful. But to get there, perhaps something like these 50 questions might be good, and though she's lady-centric the Bullish blog hands out straight forward advice (have also heard good things about her Design Your Life handbook).
posted by Gin and Broadband at 5:19 PM on January 17, 2015 [2 favorites]

I found the book 'What Color Is a Your Parachute?' had some very useful exercises. Here is a blog post with more information.
posted by bq at 5:32 PM on January 17, 2015

This is a direct link to an AMAZING free PDF by life planning coach Hans Glint. I recommend it to my clients all the time.
It's a great resource for figuring that shit out.

The title of the PDF? "What Do You Want To Do With Your Life?"

It's good stuff.
posted by John Kennedy Toole Box at 6:30 AM on January 18, 2015 [4 favorites]

I go through phases where I do this each day (write down 10 things I WANT on a daily basis). The other comments on that thread may also be useful.

Most of the things I write down each day are short term (things I want to eat, read, watch etc), but I slowly come up with longer term goals (I would like to travel, and live, overseas etc).
posted by Elysum at 10:40 AM on January 18, 2015 [1 favorite]

Response by poster: Don't know how I missed that other Ask, thanks!
posted by kutsushita nyanko at 8:22 PM on January 18, 2015