What makes someone unattractive?
July 11, 2014 8:00 PM Subscribe
I'm a young woman without much luck in romantic relationships. I think I may have a problem with my behavior and body language because I'm introverted and I'd like to understand it and maybe gain some control over it.
posted by poilkj to Human Relations (28 answers total) 31 users marked this as a favorite
So, I'm wondering what can make a person unapproachable or undesirable. What might make a man decide a pretty, normal woman is not worth pursuing? What sort of body language exudes disinterest or a judgmental character? What kind of attention is off-putting (my "flirting" is probably not very alluring)?
In recent years I've made an effort to pay attention to my body language and have tried to be better at flirting, which does not come very naturally to me. I try to seriously engage in conversation, ask lots of questions, smile and laugh at their jokes, make a little bit of eye contact. I still have issues with being quiet in big, unfamiliar group conversations, being serious one on one (I like to ask probing questions and I often get long answers), and crossing my arms sometimes. I'm doubtful I'll really be able to change some of those things, they feel too deeply rooted in my character. But hopefully this gives you some idea of how I think about this stuff and maybe a hint at what I might be doing wrong.
Thanks! Hoping to hear from your experiences, impressions, and insights.