Worried mom of 10-year-old son with inferiority complex
June 15, 2014 6:43 PM Subscribe
10-year-old that struggles with many things who, for a few years now, has, when feeling sad/depressed, talked about how no one likes him, he's not good at anything, has no special qualities, isn't smart... etc. Looking for ways to help him.
posted by youdontmakefriendswithsalad to Human Relations (51 answers total) 25 users marked this as a favorite
Single parent but other parent is involved (though we struggle to agree on what to do about this issue). We have a 10-year-old boy who struggles socially but also does okay socially (e.g., does have friends, but no special or close friends). He struggles with school but also does fine (works to get Bs and Cs). He struggles with sports (participates but is always the least skilled on the team). In other words, nothing comes easy for this one. He compares himself to others and comes out feeling as if he doesn't measure up. Though I will try and point out things he does excel at (he is hilarious, a loyal and caring friend who will fight to the death for the ones he loves and who can memorize facts about animals like no one's business), I can't overcome his refrain of absolutes (no one likes him, he's not good at anything, he isn't special at anything). When I try to nudge him to see things with a slightly less black cloud viewpoint he'll eventually get tired of me being his cheerleader and/or pointing out who he just played with last week an say "Never mind - I'm fine," which isn't reassuring at all. I'm worried. His father who, as I mentioned, is involved, thinks I'm overreacting and would not agree to therapy.
So, I need suggestions or resources to flip this switch. Obviously, the approach I'm using isn't working. Did you have a kid like this? Was there something you did that made a difference? Were you this kid? What did your parents/could your parents have done to help you?