I broke off a long-term relationship recently, and I want that to not screw it up with a new guy I'm super excited about!
About a month ago, I ended my most serious relationship yet (~2 years, were living together) for a number of DTMFA-ish reasons. Over the past few months I had also developed strong feelings for my friend, A (which was another wakeup call re: my heart not being in it with my ex anymore). A was into me as well, but cut off contact for a while so as not to interfere with my relationship.
When I ended the relationship my predominant feeling was relief -- I relate a lot to this person
. Afterwards, I spent about a week on self-rejuvenation, doing yoga and watching movies, reconnecting with friends, thanking those who had helped me through the breakup decision. Then I asked to A to hang out again, who gladly agreed. We've since spent the past couple of weekends together, hanging out with other friends, going out to bars/clubs, having awesome sex, great conversations, etc., and it's all amazing, yay!!! Great chemistry/attraction, and I can feel a good bond forming.
BUT, I'm really fresh post-breakup, and I want to make sure I'm pursuing this new thing in a healthy way, because I care a lot about this guy and think we have really good potential. I *feel* fine, and think I did most of the emotional processing before the end of the relationship anyway, but I still want to be careful here (and A has expressed the same thing).
So in theory I'd like to "take it slow", both because of the recent breakup, and also because why not, since we have literally ALL THE TIME IN THE WORLD… but how do I do that, practically speaking? What does "taking it slow" even mean? The only concrete things I have thought of are limiting # of weeknight sleepovers, and not rushing into saying "I love you", but otherwise I have no idea! We haven't talked much about exclusivity but have each at various times made it known to the other that we aren't interested in anyone else right now. I'm generally someone who goes from zero to "LET'S HANG OUT ALL THE TIME EVERY DAY" pretty quickly, so this is sort of a foreign concept to me. We are mid-twenties if that's relevant to your advice.