First Wedding Dance- Not-Slow Edition
December 4, 2013 12:33 PM

My fiancee and I are getting married in April and we're planning to do our first dance to be sort of a last dance (after the parent dances) that kicks off the dance/party portion of the evening. Our dancing will be "fast", a reflection of our fun-loving personalities (and reflection that we met at a bar, dancing), perfect for a fairly rowdy crowd (but safe for all ages), and not requiring anything new to learn. . Have you done or seen something like this? What tips do you have?

We love dancing at parties and bars but have no training or experience dancing outside (in front of the 180+). We'll be dancing to Capital Cities - Safe and Sound. We want to really express our personalities, both of us have some 'signature' dance moves. The plan is that it segues into a party hit (Outkast - Hey Ya!? or something that mixes well) that the wedding party (15 total) will join in then hopefully others will as well.


While the wedding is big, expensive and 'traditional', it's more casual and the crowd is 80% young people.
posted by sandmanwv to Society & Culture (10 answers total)
Don't fret over this. Your song choices are spot on and any dancing at all will be fine.

You don't have to choreograph something, just have the DJ say, "Join the bride and groom," about half way through the song. Keep the songs upbeat for about 15 minutes, then you can do YMCA or the Chicken Dance.

Mazel-Tov!
posted by Ruthless Bunny at 1:02 PM on December 4, 2013


Yes, have seen this and it works fine. There's nothing wrong with going to a dance lesson or two to make you both comfortable with your moves for the "performance," and there's also nothing wrong with just winging it because you like dancing together.

If you have an MC, or someone with a loud voice or mike, they could announce that you are going to do a dance that reflects that you met at a bar, dancing.
posted by bearwife at 1:03 PM on December 4, 2013


Sounds like fun! You two could also mime-act out meeting at a bar i.e. she's holding a drink, he catches her eye, they look at each other when the other isn't looking etc. and then slowly come together like it's the love of your life..... before the music changes from slow to fast and you bust out some serious dance moves!

Don't forget to "spot" when you turn.

Congrats you crazy kids!
posted by St. Peepsburg at 1:09 PM on December 4, 2013


You could also plant some friends in the audience to join in on the "bar dancing" at a specified point in the song, so all you have to do is wave and encourage them to join. Everyone else should get the idea after that.
posted by St. Peepsburg at 1:10 PM on December 4, 2013


I have no idea what a sort of last dance that kicks off a dance party is.

Calling it the last dance implies no more dancing party stuff after that, but people will probably figure out there is a dance party when there is still plenty of evening and music left.

If you just mean a showier version of the traditional first dance as a married couple, that's really common. People showing their personalities, common. Picking a song you like, even more common. Not at all unusual.

I'm not sure what you are asking. Practicing beforehand is good idea, working out a routine to do can let you focus on dancing with your partner more, you can get your fast moves down and make sure you move smoothly together. If you are not sure how to express your personalities and fit in your signature dance moves, you can hire a choreographer. But both of those take learning new things, and you said you didn't want to do that.

If you don't want to practice for this, try to go out dancing a lot beforehand.

You'll need to let people in the wedding party know you expect them to dance beforehand.

If you want these 15 people to all dance together in a coordinated way, you will have to practice and learn a routine. If some of them are traveling in just for the wedding, you'll want to keep it fairly simple.
posted by yohko at 1:11 PM on December 4, 2013


This may be over the top for you, but I love the fact that they just went for it and had fun.
posted by DWRoelands at 1:39 PM on December 4, 2013


I'm certain the couple in the video DWRoelands links to rehearsed for that. It's a well planned and executed dance.
posted by yohko at 1:58 PM on December 4, 2013


I have friends who took four lessons with a dance teacher who taught them a routine/90s dance moves. The wedding hasn't happened yet so I haven't seen it but I know it's going to be awesome!!

Congratulations!
posted by mooza at 6:01 PM on December 4, 2013


My wife and I did this for our wedding. (Our first dance was to "Beyond the Sea," by Darin. Not quite as fast as what you have in mind, but definitely not standard first-dance fare.) Just inform the bridal party to jump in when the first song starts, and everybody else will get the idea. Don't sweat it—it'll go fine.
posted by waldo at 6:10 PM on December 4, 2013


Mrs MM and I took more than 15 years to get married, so our first dance was the surprisingly fast "You Can't Hurry Love."

My top tip is pick a short song or make sure that you've cued up people to come join you early.

Time is relative. Each second you're dancing in front of an assembled group feels like 5 normal seconds.
posted by MuffinMan at 12:29 AM on December 5, 2013


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