How do you show yourself that you love yourself?
October 17, 2013 7:53 PM Subscribe
I've pretty much always hated myself. I'd like that to change at some point, and am willing to go the "fake it til you make it" route. How do you show yourself that you love and value yourself?
posted by anonymous to Human Relations (41 answers total) 94 users marked this as a favorite
One of my very first memories involved a realization that I hated myself. That feeling's always been simmering in the background but has been especially present lately (seasonal depression, financial stress, a breakup... basically your usual depressive-thinking triggers). Hopefully I don't sound like that fucking crap song, but I really, really want to learn to love myself. Trouble is, I don't have any idea what that even looks like. I think I need practical suggestions. What does that phrase mean to you? How do you show yourself that you love yourself?
(I've talked about this with therapists a bit but not productively. I'm certainly having a depressive episode and am lining up therapy, but insurance only pays for five sessions, I can't afford full-price therapy because of a recent financial catastrophe that's left me basically broke, and I make too much on paper for most people to do a sliding scale. I am mildly bipolar and take an anticonvulsant for hypomania, but most anti-depression meds leave me feeling spun so meds aren't an option. Hence the DIY method.)
Other deets b/c of anonymity: American, queer man, early 40s, demanding caretaker-y profession, an injury that's forced me to largely abandon a performing arts career (so "do the thing you love most" doesn't work for me anymore), one time/practice intensive and gratifying hobby. I've only lived in this city for a couple years and am somewhat socially anxious in groups, especially when I don't know anyone. I have one circle of friends, but for various ex-related reasons I need to take a break from them for a while. I have a gym membership I don't use often enough, and eat crap food every night because I don't really know how to cook. I know that changing those last couple things will help me feel better, and I'm going for a workout after I post this.
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