Don't look back! Don't looks back!
January 7, 2013 7:23 AM Subscribe
I'm a 29 yr old female, married, and have two children. Yet, I am terrified of the dark and being home alone. For as long as I can remember darkness has petrified me and I can't enter a room that's dark, or even look into one. When I'm home alone, no matter the time of day, I get so scared that something is following me, in the house, or about to get me. I jump at every noise and will often just stand in the middle of the room looking back and forth quickly, so nothing can sneak up on me. I'm tired of being so scared and it's hard to comfort a child who's scared when you get just as scared as them.
posted by Sweetmag to Grab Bag (35 answers total) 9 users marked this as a favorite
Here's some examples of my level of scaredy cattedness:
- Slightly open closet doors must mean someone or something snuck in there and is now peeking at me from the small gape. Full blown panic will set in, I will run from the room and yell for my husband to come shut the door. If no one's home, I'll just avoid that room till they are home.
- Walking up stairs I brace myself to be dragged back down the stairs by whatever crazy thing I believe to be there. Most often I will have my husband walk behind me up the stairs for protection, but when alone I will bolt up the stairs no matter how much I tell myself nothing will get me.
- I always jump into bed, because I'm terrified something will grab my ankles and yank me under the bed. I won't even get out of bed to use the bathroom during the night, because I'm just to scared of the dark hallway, stairwell or what's under my bed.
-Darkness paralyzes me. If I need to get somewhere, but I must pass through or by darkness I just won't go. I will stand there in a corner till my husband can get to me and escort me.
-Showering during the day is my biggest challenge. I can't hear a single thing when I'm in the bathroom. It makes showering incredibly hard if I'm home alone, because I'm convinced something is sneaking up on me, waiting outside the door for me or is staring directly at me while I have my eyes shut. My anxiety level will skyrocket and I have to get out of the shower quickly whether I'm done or not.
I'm not afraid of outside darkness, but inside darkness. I could stand outside in the dark and maybe be a little uncomfortable, but something about the house and darkness just get to me.
I try to tell myself this is nonsense, there's nothing to be afraid of, you should know by now that there is no monsters, but it doesn't work. I feel like I live in some sort of horror show and every second is the second I'm about to be dragged down the basement stairs and...i'm not sure what I think is going to happen.
When I get scared I become unable to move, my heart starts pounding, my anxiety is through the roof and all the hair on my body stands up. I feel like a small child locked in a dark basement and I'm tired of it. I don't like being scared of my own shadow all the freakin' time and I want to be able to get past this so I can feel like a normal adult. I can't pinpoint any one reason that would explain this, i've just always been this way. It has gotten worse the older I get and now it's to the point that I will curl up in a ball and cry if confronted with darkness or anything that scares the crap out of me.
So, help me metafilter. To those who have been or still are scared of the dark, what were/are the tricks or tips you use to calm your irrational fears? Am I forever stuck being scared of every bump in the night or can I overcome this?