July 25, 2012 7:28 PM Subscribe
How do you decide to have a baby? Like, actually, literally decide, "today we're going to try"?
posted by annie o to human relations (38 answers total) 19 users marked this as a favorite
My husband and I are fairly certain we want to have kids. What we're not certain of is when to ACTUALLY pull the trigger on it. If you have kids, how did you make the decision to actually start 'trying'? What was the trigger that tipped you over from "yeah we should do that, it would awesome" to "let's do that right now"?
We feel reasonably confident in our ability to financially and emotionally handle having a kid if it happened tomorrow, but at the same time we enjoy the freedom of having two incomes and few responsibilities. We're 27(me) and 29(him) so young, but not SO young. We agree we'd rather become parents at 29 than 39. We both have fairly demanding jobs.
The tricky part for us is that he is currently a postdoctoral fellow with one more year of grant funding and his PI will (definitely, not even a question) fund a few more years beyond that - meaning he could have a very flexible job for up to three more years. I have very little job flexibility and am unlikely to in the near term future, so it would be pretty advantageous to use his post-doc period for some child-care flexibility. But that means deciding this NOW, which seems so... soon?
How did you decide to jump in?