Am I putting too much pressure on my head in this position?

June 27, 2012 3:23 PM

Am I going to hurt my neck while masturbating? I'm female. No, not talking about erotic asphyxiation.

As long as I can remember I've masturbated by grinding on a pillow or piled up blanket, on my knees, butt in the air, with my forehead pushing into the bed or pillow. It's like I'm having sex with me on top. My hands are down under the pillow or blanket, so a lot of weight ends up being on my head.

Articles about how people have hurt their necks while doing yoga made me worry that I'm putting too much pressure on my head and neck while I do this. It's the only way of masturbating that works for me and I can't get comfortable unless my head is down like that.

Should I relax and enjoy it, or is this risky?

posted by anonymous to Health & Fitness (9 answers total)

Stretch afterwards. Roll your neck like in those "don't succumb to office numb!" posters.
Make sure you're not actively jamming your neck into whatever's in front of you.

Try using your inactive arm or hand to prop yourself up slightly, keeping your back relatively in line, so your head and neck are suspended. In fact, if you really want to help yourself long term for masturbatory AND dual sexy times, make sure you're including upper arm, back, and abdominal exercises in your regimen.

Try rolling your upper body back so you're sitting up more and perhaps try to be more active, rather than holding yourself in, what I'm assuming, is a fairly stationary position. This can simulate even more "on top" for when you're by yourself, as well as giving you some practice using abdominal movements during sex. Basically, just play around (heh).

This is pretty much my favorite personal position ever, and I had the same issue + a sore neck since I kept wanting to keep my head turned in the same direction I sleep in (since my neck doesn't rotate as far or as comfortably in other direction).
posted by DisreputableDog at 3:37 PM on June 27, 2012 [3 favorites]

Oh, the overall answer is: yes. Any repetitive motion involving a fairly locked position, and especially without stretching once in a while (before and after if you can help it) can serve to damage your body over time.
Again, seek out help on dealing with exercising at your desk.

Also, have you looked up exactly how those who partake in yoga deal with their neck pressure? Look to those who perform similar exercises and treat accordingly.

Also be sure you're drinking enough water daily. This seems like stupid advice, but masturbation is a form of exercise, resulting in sweat and other possible fluid loss. Being dehydrated while placing pressure on your spine and other neck and upper back muscles doesn't seem like a good idea, so just be aware.
posted by DisreputableDog at 3:46 PM on June 27, 2012 [1 favorite]

The important issue here isn't so much the masturbation as the positioning. If the force you are exerting on your neck is causing you to feel a stretch, it wouldn't hurt to do some light neck warm-up stretches in addition to the afterwards stretches that DisreputableDog suggests.

It doesn't sound like you are doing anything that is so physically violent that you are risking greater neck damage, but if you find that your neck is hurting while in position - and not in a muscular way - you should consider looking for alternatives positions.
posted by Joey Michaels at 3:46 PM on June 27, 2012

Move the pillow from your head to your chest and let your head hang over the pillow - it will put the weight on your chest/shoulders instead of your head/neck.
posted by Lt. Bunny Wigglesworth at 3:48 PM on June 27, 2012 [6 favorites]

I too was going to suggest maybe piling pillows under your chest.
posted by Occula at 4:24 PM on June 27, 2012

Liberator make a range of sex ramps/supports of various heights, shapes and sizes. Something from there might help you support your upper body without putting all your weight on your neck/head. They are a touch pricey but very good quality and surprisingly firm.
posted by wwax at 4:51 PM on June 27, 2012 [1 favorite]

I would think (not a doctor, not meaning to snark) that it would only matter if you masturbate that way a LOT. Maybe if you are in 2x-3x-a-day mode for a while, you could try another position with a vibrator? If other ways don't work normally, I bet they'd work with a vibrator. Ditto on the bathtub faucet, for example.

But once a day, sometimes twice? How bad could it possibly be for your neck? Unless you have a known back or neck problem not mentioned here. I don't mean to be flip. That's my true opinion.
posted by skbw at 5:00 PM on June 27, 2012

Or try head over the side of the bed with your hands on the floor? Not for every day, but maybe sometimes?
posted by skbw at 5:01 PM on June 27, 2012

In my younger years that was my preferred method of masturbation, so I know exactly what you are talking about, but, yes, you are putting undue pressure on your neck. I would strongly suggest looking into sex toys, particularly vibrators. Keep in mind that there are a lot of options and toys can be expensive. When you find the right one it's worth it, but start simply and go from there.
posted by katemcd at 6:26 PM on June 27, 2012