How to get the perfectly imperfect haircut?
June 14, 2012 10:00 PM Subscribe
I've been struggling for years to keep my haircut in a disheveled state that I feel most comfortable with. Mainly, this involves doing it myself with clippers and scissors in the mirror while somewhat tipsy. I'd like to start getting it cut by a professional, but don't know how to express what I'm aiming for.
I've had maybe half a dozen professional haircuts in the past fifteen years, and they never achieve what I really want. Basically, they're too uniform and too controlled, and just don't feel natural on me.
My standard DIY method is to take a clipper, trim up the sides and back with a #3 guide, pull up the hair on top and snip anything that feels particularly long, and then sweep the bangs forward and trims however feels right at the moment. This inevitably results in a couple weird gouges or long hairs that need to be trimmed over the coming days, but my method pretty much always produces something I like within a week, and looks decent for a couple months (see my profile picture for an example of the shaggier end of the spectrum).
Anyway, I'm getting more responsibilities at work, getting older, and feel like I should learn how to get a proper adult hair-cut. However, whenever I do it always ends up feeling so perfect and uniform. I really like the weird twists of fate from doing it myself.
So, is there a way to request my method but without the chance of serious fuck-ups that can result by not being able to see the back of my head? My hair is very fine (but not thinning at all) and wavy, and has a tendency to do Farrah Fawcett flippy things in the back and by the ears as it grows out, and I just want to say "get rid of the flippies, and go edward scissorhands on the rest", but I don't know how well that would go over.
Any experienced hair-cutters/hair-cut getters, please hope me. I'd like to join the ranks of civilized barber/stylist-going adults.
Of possible relevance:
a. I live in Portland. Been to Bishops once, got a decent cut, but still have no idea what the correct terminology is to request what I want.
b. I use American Crew Fiber (a dry waxy pommade) to keep my hair from turning into a puffball. Should I go to the salon sans-product, or does it matter?
I've had maybe half a dozen professional haircuts in the past fifteen years, and they never achieve what I really want. Basically, they're too uniform and too controlled, and just don't feel natural on me.
My standard DIY method is to take a clipper, trim up the sides and back with a #3 guide, pull up the hair on top and snip anything that feels particularly long, and then sweep the bangs forward and trims however feels right at the moment. This inevitably results in a couple weird gouges or long hairs that need to be trimmed over the coming days, but my method pretty much always produces something I like within a week, and looks decent for a couple months (see my profile picture for an example of the shaggier end of the spectrum).
Anyway, I'm getting more responsibilities at work, getting older, and feel like I should learn how to get a proper adult hair-cut. However, whenever I do it always ends up feeling so perfect and uniform. I really like the weird twists of fate from doing it myself.
So, is there a way to request my method but without the chance of serious fuck-ups that can result by not being able to see the back of my head? My hair is very fine (but not thinning at all) and wavy, and has a tendency to do Farrah Fawcett flippy things in the back and by the ears as it grows out, and I just want to say "get rid of the flippies, and go edward scissorhands on the rest", but I don't know how well that would go over.
Any experienced hair-cutters/hair-cut getters, please hope me. I'd like to join the ranks of civilized barber/stylist-going adults.
Of possible relevance:
a. I live in Portland. Been to Bishops once, got a decent cut, but still have no idea what the correct terminology is to request what I want.
b. I use American Crew Fiber (a dry waxy pommade) to keep my hair from turning into a puffball. Should I go to the salon sans-product, or does it matter?
Find a photo online of the style you like--maybe there's a celebrity whose cut resembles what you want. Print/send to smartphone and show it to your stylist. No words needed. If they are good, you'll hopefully get something pretty close to what you want.
posted by greta simone at 10:44 PM on June 14, 2012
posted by greta simone at 10:44 PM on June 14, 2012
Can you clarify whether the top is completely disconnected from the sides? It's hard to see from the photo. Have you ever told a stylist exactly how you cut it so they can attempt to replicate the effects? Are you looking for a maintenance cut, or for someone to cut a new style in?
I think it's possible your desire for an "adult" haircut is slightly at odds with the organic thing you've got going on when you diy it. What is your ultimate goal? To get exactly the same style, but from a stylist? You might as well save your time and money by continuing to do it yourself. If your ultimate goal is to get a "better" haircut, then I think you need to let go of the idea that someone else can possibly cut your hair in the same way you do (especially when, as a stylist, I've been trained to start with a technically precise foundation cut, rather than "going edward scissorhands" on someone's head).
If you still want to keep trying out stylists, then I would do the following:
- Use pictures. This is always super helpful for a stylist, especially when a client doesn't necessarily know the terminology to use. And to be honest, I have never had a client who knew proper hair terminology, so you're probably better off not even attempting that, because it's too easy to confuse graduation/layering, etc. Use pictures. It's simpler that way.
- If possible, go to the salon without product in your hair, so that during the consultation, the stylist can see exactly what your natural hair texture is like when dry. Mention what products you use.
- Do not be afraid to give guidance to the stylist. You're totally allowed to stop them and request that they do something differently, or cut a certain area shorter, etc. Don't wait until the cut is finished before looking at yourself properly. If need be, ask to see the back periodically. Micromanaging clients are annoying, but to be frank, the stylist should be asking you throughout the haircut how it looks to you, and reiterating/clarifying the "plan" for the cut (eg. "You said you like the top quite disheveled, so I'm going to texturise it now to give it some movement."). A miraculous good fit with a stylist may result in them achieving your dream cut without any feedback from you, but it's unlikely.
[on preview, yeah, what vytae said.]
posted by catch as catch can at 11:00 PM on June 14, 2012
I think it's possible your desire for an "adult" haircut is slightly at odds with the organic thing you've got going on when you diy it. What is your ultimate goal? To get exactly the same style, but from a stylist? You might as well save your time and money by continuing to do it yourself. If your ultimate goal is to get a "better" haircut, then I think you need to let go of the idea that someone else can possibly cut your hair in the same way you do (especially when, as a stylist, I've been trained to start with a technically precise foundation cut, rather than "going edward scissorhands" on someone's head).
If you still want to keep trying out stylists, then I would do the following:
- Use pictures. This is always super helpful for a stylist, especially when a client doesn't necessarily know the terminology to use. And to be honest, I have never had a client who knew proper hair terminology, so you're probably better off not even attempting that, because it's too easy to confuse graduation/layering, etc. Use pictures. It's simpler that way.
- If possible, go to the salon without product in your hair, so that during the consultation, the stylist can see exactly what your natural hair texture is like when dry. Mention what products you use.
- Do not be afraid to give guidance to the stylist. You're totally allowed to stop them and request that they do something differently, or cut a certain area shorter, etc. Don't wait until the cut is finished before looking at yourself properly. If need be, ask to see the back periodically. Micromanaging clients are annoying, but to be frank, the stylist should be asking you throughout the haircut how it looks to you, and reiterating/clarifying the "plan" for the cut (eg. "You said you like the top quite disheveled, so I'm going to texturise it now to give it some movement."). A miraculous good fit with a stylist may result in them achieving your dream cut without any feedback from you, but it's unlikely.
[on preview, yeah, what vytae said.]
posted by catch as catch can at 11:00 PM on June 14, 2012
I have had fantastic luck with showing photos to stylists. Additionally if you tell them what you want, they can help you. I told my stylist that my job means I have to appear professional, but I still want a wacky haircut, and also I am lazy - somehow he cut it in a way that allowed me to drastically change my hair's appearance with just a few flicks of a brush.
posted by Lt. Bunny Wigglesworth at 11:09 PM on June 14, 2012
posted by Lt. Bunny Wigglesworth at 11:09 PM on June 14, 2012
Also, if you are getting a haircut, I would say go to the stylist with some product, so they can see how you plan to style it. Good stylists should give your hair a wash prior to a style.
posted by Lt. Bunny Wigglesworth at 11:12 PM on June 14, 2012
posted by Lt. Bunny Wigglesworth at 11:12 PM on June 14, 2012
Try using the word "piecey," stylist code for hair that kinda groups itself into clumps or sections: pic pic pic (all found via google image searches for piecey hair, piecey hair men, etc.).
posted by salvia at 11:50 PM on June 14, 2012 [1 favorite]
posted by salvia at 11:50 PM on June 14, 2012 [1 favorite]
Jeff at the Cutting Crew on Hawthorne does a good job with a razor cut (less uniform than a normal scissors cut)
posted by kbuxton at 1:05 AM on June 15, 2012
posted by kbuxton at 1:05 AM on June 15, 2012
Find a great men's stylist...not barber, but stylist at a salon. Describe to them exactly how you have been cutting your hair for the past 15 years. Tell them you often like the look it achieves (tousled and imperfect on top, close cropped back and sides?) but find that it is too inconsistent and too difficult to do on your own. Seconding bringing pictures of yourself on good hair days with you. Even if you lack the proper terminology to tell them exactly what you want, the pictures will tell the story. Go to the appointment with product in your hair like you would normally style it so they can see what you are going for. They will be able to tell your natural texture even with the product in it.
Most importantly, if you are getting a bad vibe from the stylist - they are rushing through the consultation (with a new client this part should take at LEAST 10 minutes), are trying to talk you into something different, they are rude or dismissive of your requests - you are totally within your rights to say it's not working out and walk out before they start cutting.
I have short intentionally messy looking hair and my stylist will take small sections, twist them up and then runs his scissors from the tip of the twist down toward the base (does that make sense? this is hard to describe...). Let me try that again. Hold up your left index finger like you are about to scream WE'RE NUMBER 1; that is the "twist" of hair. Then take your first two fingers of your right hand like they are scissors. Hold your scissor hand perpendicular to the other hand with the "twist" between your scissor fingers, then run scissor fingers from the tip of the twist to the base. That was way too complicated, but that's what my awesome stylist does to make my hair piecey and messy and un-perfect.
If you are ever in the DC area, see Khuong at PR at Partners Tysons. I used to work for the company and Khuong is the only person I will EVER let touch my hair EVER EVER AGAIN. He is truly gifted.
posted by Gonestarfishing at 5:45 AM on June 15, 2012
Most importantly, if you are getting a bad vibe from the stylist - they are rushing through the consultation (with a new client this part should take at LEAST 10 minutes), are trying to talk you into something different, they are rude or dismissive of your requests - you are totally within your rights to say it's not working out and walk out before they start cutting.
I have short intentionally messy looking hair and my stylist will take small sections, twist them up and then runs his scissors from the tip of the twist down toward the base (does that make sense? this is hard to describe...). Let me try that again. Hold up your left index finger like you are about to scream WE'RE NUMBER 1; that is the "twist" of hair. Then take your first two fingers of your right hand like they are scissors. Hold your scissor hand perpendicular to the other hand with the "twist" between your scissor fingers, then run scissor fingers from the tip of the twist to the base. That was way too complicated, but that's what my awesome stylist does to make my hair piecey and messy and un-perfect.
If you are ever in the DC area, see Khuong at PR at Partners Tysons. I used to work for the company and Khuong is the only person I will EVER let touch my hair EVER EVER AGAIN. He is truly gifted.
posted by Gonestarfishing at 5:45 AM on June 15, 2012
Response by poster: Ah, it looks like the key word I was missing was "maintenance". My usual cycle is something like short sides/back with slightly piecey/longer top and bangs, which grows into an unruly mess with sideswept bangs about 4 months later when the flippy bits around the edges force me to start from the beginning. What I want is to be able to go from month 4 back to month 2, but every time I've tried to get a pro to do this it's ended up to controlled and even.
I'll try taking pictures of good hair days through my next grow cycle and then talk to a stylist about exactly where in the cycle I'm trying to get back to. Thanks for the advice, all!
posted by a box and a stick and a string and a bear at 8:50 AM on June 15, 2012
I'll try taking pictures of good hair days through my next grow cycle and then talk to a stylist about exactly where in the cycle I'm trying to get back to. Thanks for the advice, all!
posted by a box and a stick and a string and a bear at 8:50 AM on June 15, 2012
I've found that hairdressers call what we as laypeople call "uneven" either "disconnects" or "asymmetric". You may find that Paul Mitchell trained stylists are good at disconnects -- that's been my experience. Vidal Sassoon also will be good with understanding funkiness, I think.
Also, I'd go for a salon that either has a bunch of funky-haired [cut, not color!] stylists or if you can get a sense of clientele, funky-haired clientele. Also, if you see anyone with hair you love, ask them where they get their hair done. I've actually also had good luck with telling the hairstylist that I want "a hairstylist's haircut", meaning something where your hair is a little more crazy.
I'm not sure if I misunderstood something, but it is entirely possible you need to get your hair cut more frequently (month 4? that's a long time between cuts).
posted by freezer cake at 3:39 PM on June 15, 2012
Also, I'd go for a salon that either has a bunch of funky-haired [cut, not color!] stylists or if you can get a sense of clientele, funky-haired clientele. Also, if you see anyone with hair you love, ask them where they get their hair done. I've actually also had good luck with telling the hairstylist that I want "a hairstylist's haircut", meaning something where your hair is a little more crazy.
I'm not sure if I misunderstood something, but it is entirely possible you need to get your hair cut more frequently (month 4? that's a long time between cuts).
posted by freezer cake at 3:39 PM on June 15, 2012
"Piecey" (as mentioned) and "chunky" are two words to use liberally in your description of what you want. I sometimes use the term "finger-spiky", illustrating it by sticking my fingers into the top of my hair and tugging upward to make it spiky and mussed.
posted by Lexica at 3:28 PM on June 16, 2012
posted by Lexica at 3:28 PM on June 16, 2012
This thread is closed to new comments.
It's a little confusing to me what your goal is, and I wonder if sorting that part out might also help you find the perfect haircut experience. It sounds like you want to look the same as you do now, but that somehow having somebody else achieve that look for you will make you feel more like an adult? Or do you want to look different somehow in a way that you can't manage while doing your own haircuts? If the former, I'd say save your money and keep cutting it yourself -- feel like a grown-up by flossing more or eating more fiber or something. If it's the latter, your best bet is to find a really great stylist (get recommendations from another dude with amazing hair) and give them free rein. A talented hairstylist might totally change up your style into something that you love but could never have imagined or asked for.
posted by vytae at 10:34 PM on June 14, 2012 [2 favorites]