I like my job, I love my life, and I have awesome friends, all here in Philly. But being literally the only person I know without a long-term relationship isn't good for my sanity. Where ARE all the single people, anyway?
posted by "Sock puppet" is outdated and insulting to Human Relations (21 answers total) 13 users marked this as a favorite
My friends really are great people, and I'm certainly not interested in ditching them. But nearly everyone I hang out with on a halfway regular basis is in a stable long-term relationship, and most of them live with their significant others; I haven't run the numbers, but I'd guess that half are married or engaged. This is creating a situation where I feel weird, awkward, and out-of-place for being single at the ancient age of 27.
Just to clarify, nobody's saying or doing anything in particular that's causing me to feel this way - it's just when every single social event is "This couple, that couple, another couple, and me," it can get kind of old. This isn't just me talking; my therapist pointed out that my social circle is giving me a skewed perspective, and suggested that it would help if I had people I saw as peers who aren't attached.
So what I'm looking for some help with, is ideas for places/things to do that might give me a social environment where not everyone is paired off. I know the usual automatic advice here is "Just engage in your hobbies, and find people who are into those things," but I've done that - and, yeah, it seems like everyone I meet, when we end up meeting after $HOBBY_EVENT for drinks, brings along their girlfriend/boyfriend, or leaves early to go home to that person, and I'm back to feeling like the only single guy in the city.
It's not about avoiding non-single people, and it's not about dating - not that I'd object to that, but this is simply about simply giving myself some reassurance that, no, I'm really not that weird, and I'm no kind of lame loser just for being "so old" and not having a partner.
* I'm 27, male, and I have a techie, professional career. (And, yes, literally every single person in my (small) office is married, other than me.)
* Inasmuch as it matters, I live in Philadelphia.
* I am not in any way religious.
* Sports are not an option. While I'm more active than a lot of people, I have a non-obvious medical condition that makes, say, "join a weekend soccer league" completely unavailable.
* My job involves intermittent and unpredictable travel that makes taking classes, especially semester-length ones, difficult.