Helpful things for new parents?
February 4, 2012 1:32 PM Subscribe
What sort of things did parents find useful to have in the first few weeks of having a new baby? Any recommendations for (easily freezable) meals? Or things we should stock up on for us?
Baby Betelgeuse is due any day now (literally). We're actually feeling pretty prepared with baby stuff and, wherever we aren't, there's Amazon Prime. We are going to have some help early on from both sets of our parents, so we're feeling pretty lucky overall. Others have suggested that we cook some things and freeze them, but we haven't had much other specific advice other than things along the line of, "get ready for Armageddon."
So, any specific suggestions as to what we can do for us in these last few days for the next few weeks? Thanks!
Baby Betelgeuse is due any day now (literally). We're actually feeling pretty prepared with baby stuff and, wherever we aren't, there's Amazon Prime. We are going to have some help early on from both sets of our parents, so we're feeling pretty lucky overall. Others have suggested that we cook some things and freeze them, but we haven't had much other specific advice other than things along the line of, "get ready for Armageddon."
So, any specific suggestions as to what we can do for us in these last few days for the next few weeks? Thanks!
We have a 3-month old. For us, it was great to have a variety of healthy snacks on hand - fresh fruit, cheese, nuts, etc. You'll be up at all hours, and won't necessarily feel like a full meal at all times. We were also lucky to have family members bringing food over. They brought things like leftover dinners (that had already been cooked), and a lasagna that just had to be cooked in the oven.
posted by barney_sap at 1:42 PM on February 4, 2012 [1 favorite]
posted by barney_sap at 1:42 PM on February 4, 2012 [1 favorite]
A similar questions was asked about freezer meals, but many of the answers are actually just quick and easy meals and snacks.
I would aim to have stuff ready for around the 4-6 week mark, because that's where the exhaustion hits and when many of the extra hands start to disappear. (Not to freak you out...it's just a bit of a change and the baby often changes their schedule around then too.) So I would get your extra help to do as much as possible in the short term and then aim to be ready for a few weeks later. Healthy snacks can be really helpful. And pack lots of snacks for the hospital, in case the cafeteria is closed when you're hungry.
posted by Chaussette and the Pussy Cats at 2:02 PM on February 4, 2012
I would aim to have stuff ready for around the 4-6 week mark, because that's where the exhaustion hits and when many of the extra hands start to disappear. (Not to freak you out...it's just a bit of a change and the baby often changes their schedule around then too.) So I would get your extra help to do as much as possible in the short term and then aim to be ready for a few weeks later. Healthy snacks can be really helpful. And pack lots of snacks for the hospital, in case the cafeteria is closed when you're hungry.
posted by Chaussette and the Pussy Cats at 2:02 PM on February 4, 2012
If you're running low on your favourite personal care products, buy more now. Like, two.
I cried the morning I ran out of my facial cleanser, because I hadn't had more than 2 continuous hours of sleep for two months and I just wanted to wash my damn face!
posted by sillymama at 2:03 PM on February 4, 2012
I cried the morning I ran out of my facial cleanser, because I hadn't had more than 2 continuous hours of sleep for two months and I just wanted to wash my damn face!
posted by sillymama at 2:03 PM on February 4, 2012
I couldn't think of much, because the biggest things that were helpful for us when we had our little duder were having my mom around for the first two weeks to cook and help watch him, and a bouncy relaxer seat thing for him (it didn't really BOUNCE so much but it had springs so it had some give and could rock if needed, it also vibrated) so we could set him down in something comfy if we needed a break. But I agree with Chaussette and the Pussy Cats that having meals. support, and relaxation for the 4-6 week mark would be excellent because THAT'S around the point where exhaustion and frustration and crying started to set in.
posted by agress at 2:07 PM on February 4, 2012
posted by agress at 2:07 PM on February 4, 2012
Lots and lots and lots of baby blankets for swaddling. You think you have enough, but diapers leak and you end up needing to change out the blankets pretty often.
And yes, easy to prepare food. I happened to have baked a huge batch of christmas cookies the day I went into labor, and I pretty much existed on them the first week home. Try to be better prepared than I was!
posted by MexicanYenta at 2:19 PM on February 4, 2012
And yes, easy to prepare food. I happened to have baked a huge batch of christmas cookies the day I went into labor, and I pretty much existed on them the first week home. Try to be better prepared than I was!
posted by MexicanYenta at 2:19 PM on February 4, 2012
I liked having my computer all set up. Software up-to-date, good backup systems automated, organized folders for all those incoming photos and videos. All systems ready for bill-paying that could be done by either parent. I printed out laundry instructions and posted them at the washer for any visitors who wanted to help. Have the car all clean and empty, all junk taken to the dump.
I was glad I had bought a few boxes of multi-purpose greeting cards to send out for birthdays, thank you notes and baby updates, when getting to a card store just wasn't a priority. It's also good to have some shows or movies on DVD ready for watching while rocking the child endlessly, particularly a series.
posted by xo at 2:19 PM on February 4, 2012
I was glad I had bought a few boxes of multi-purpose greeting cards to send out for birthdays, thank you notes and baby updates, when getting to a card store just wasn't a priority. It's also good to have some shows or movies on DVD ready for watching while rocking the child endlessly, particularly a series.
posted by xo at 2:19 PM on February 4, 2012
You should buy two bottles of sterile eye wash and a couple bags of cotton balls. Being young, you might not have these things for yourself and I am mentioning it because it is one of those things you might need in the middle of the night and you do not want to go all the way to the drugstore in the middle of the night just for sterile eyewash. Lots of other things you can make-do but not so easy with eye wash when you've got something in your eye at 3 o'clock in the morning and babies don't wait for you to get your &%*$ together, lol. You might need it for the baby, too.
Have a bag of cotton balls that is just for eye emergencies. That way the balls won't get contaminated with make-up etc. Then, wash your hands before reaching into the bag. Dry thoroughly. Try not to touch the other balls in the bag when you pull one out. Seal bag tightly. After an eye infection in the family, throw the remaining bag of unused cotton balls away and buy a fresh new bag for the future.
Don't touch the eyewash bottle tip to the cotton balls. Don't touch the eyewash bottle tip. If you touch the eyewash bottle tip throw it out and get a new bottle.
Before the baby comes, find out who in your town has 24 hour "ask a nurse" hotlines. For when you can't get in touch with your family or doctor in the middle of the night. And don't ever, ever, be afraid to call. Veteran parents know the beauty of reaching out so every life or death question you have is not on your shoulders alone.
posted by cda at 2:26 PM on February 4, 2012
Have a bag of cotton balls that is just for eye emergencies. That way the balls won't get contaminated with make-up etc. Then, wash your hands before reaching into the bag. Dry thoroughly. Try not to touch the other balls in the bag when you pull one out. Seal bag tightly. After an eye infection in the family, throw the remaining bag of unused cotton balls away and buy a fresh new bag for the future.
Don't touch the eyewash bottle tip to the cotton balls. Don't touch the eyewash bottle tip. If you touch the eyewash bottle tip throw it out and get a new bottle.
Before the baby comes, find out who in your town has 24 hour "ask a nurse" hotlines. For when you can't get in touch with your family or doctor in the middle of the night. And don't ever, ever, be afraid to call. Veteran parents know the beauty of reaching out so every life or death question you have is not on your shoulders alone.
posted by cda at 2:26 PM on February 4, 2012
Oh yeah, we also got a case of Gatorade at Costco before the baby came along. It really helped with my milk supply in the beginning, and it helped with the ridiculous thirst I got at the beginning of breastfeeding.
posted by barney_sap at 2:30 PM on February 4, 2012
posted by barney_sap at 2:30 PM on February 4, 2012
Parent of a 3 and a half month old here. Premptively buy:
The biggest amount of washing powder/detergent you can get.
Lots and lots and lots of toilet roles.
A prodigious amount of tissue boxes, good god we go through tissues.
Buy several packs of newborn nappies if you're using disposables. It's really handy no having to buy them.
Nthing HEALTHY snacks. We ended up eating a lot of shit in between meals (which I had taken care of). It made us feel worse in the long run, and trust me, you won't be getting the exercise levels you used to if you exercise regularly now.
Nthing water bottles. Invaluable.
Make sure your medicine cabinet has all the basics, band-aids, disinfectant cream, painkillers, antihistamine, etc.
If you don't have any, I strongly recommend getting some dvds, tv, shows, and audiobooks or podcasts. The audiobooks were great for me at night when trying, but not, asleep and needing something to take my mind off the fact that I was still awake.
Things you can do.
Clean the bathroom now. And clean it good; it will be a while before it sees a brush again.
Do as much washing as you can, especially sheets.
If you have been given a stack of baby clothes, sort them into sizes now (0000, 000, 00), that was you have them in order as the baby's growing which is convenient.
If you want to use a dummy, buy a few different types now; babies can be very particular about dummies, and they may hate some but like others. This might sound weird, but what worked for us was finding one that bore passing resemblance to the "source" as it were.
Set up somewhere where you will be doing the lion's share of nappy changes. It should have something to hold dirty nappies (bin with a lid is great), something to hold new nappies, a change mat (could just be a towel, but you need something), tissues, wet wipes, and baby powder.
And most importantly:
Don't worry! They're kind of... larval for the first couple of weeks, so if you forget anything you'll have a bit of time to take care of it. And you've still got some energy reserves. We found it much more challenging after about four weeks, when sleep was running low and baby was more interactive/crying louder. Also, gird your loins, when it comes to babies, everyone's got an opinion and no one seems to accept babies just frigging cry sometimes and it doesn't mean anything's wrong or needs to change. Brace yourself for lots of judgment whatever your choices, and torrents of un-wanted advice. Also, if you're the dad, be prepared for stupid looks and comments from older women if you're out in public alone and the baby's crying. I got everything from "where's her mother?!" to literal tsk-tsking. Maybe you won't get that, but I was totally unprepared and it really made me want to avoid going out, especially in busy places with the baby in the early days. This said: Go out every day. You won't want to, but it's important for everyone to get out. Memail at any time if you've got any other questions or just need someone's ear to chew off. You're going to have something crazy, wonderful, and very intense happening to you. :)
posted by smoke at 2:31 PM on February 4, 2012 [7 favorites]
The biggest amount of washing powder/detergent you can get.
Lots and lots and lots of toilet roles.
A prodigious amount of tissue boxes, good god we go through tissues.
Buy several packs of newborn nappies if you're using disposables. It's really handy no having to buy them.
Nthing HEALTHY snacks. We ended up eating a lot of shit in between meals (which I had taken care of). It made us feel worse in the long run, and trust me, you won't be getting the exercise levels you used to if you exercise regularly now.
Nthing water bottles. Invaluable.
Make sure your medicine cabinet has all the basics, band-aids, disinfectant cream, painkillers, antihistamine, etc.
If you don't have any, I strongly recommend getting some dvds, tv, shows, and audiobooks or podcasts. The audiobooks were great for me at night when trying, but not, asleep and needing something to take my mind off the fact that I was still awake.
Things you can do.
Clean the bathroom now. And clean it good; it will be a while before it sees a brush again.
Do as much washing as you can, especially sheets.
If you have been given a stack of baby clothes, sort them into sizes now (0000, 000, 00), that was you have them in order as the baby's growing which is convenient.
If you want to use a dummy, buy a few different types now; babies can be very particular about dummies, and they may hate some but like others. This might sound weird, but what worked for us was finding one that bore passing resemblance to the "source" as it were.
Set up somewhere where you will be doing the lion's share of nappy changes. It should have something to hold dirty nappies (bin with a lid is great), something to hold new nappies, a change mat (could just be a towel, but you need something), tissues, wet wipes, and baby powder.
And most importantly:
Don't worry! They're kind of... larval for the first couple of weeks, so if you forget anything you'll have a bit of time to take care of it. And you've still got some energy reserves. We found it much more challenging after about four weeks, when sleep was running low and baby was more interactive/crying louder. Also, gird your loins, when it comes to babies, everyone's got an opinion and no one seems to accept babies just frigging cry sometimes and it doesn't mean anything's wrong or needs to change. Brace yourself for lots of judgment whatever your choices, and torrents of un-wanted advice. Also, if you're the dad, be prepared for stupid looks and comments from older women if you're out in public alone and the baby's crying. I got everything from "where's her mother?!" to literal tsk-tsking. Maybe you won't get that, but I was totally unprepared and it really made me want to avoid going out, especially in busy places with the baby in the early days. This said: Go out every day. You won't want to, but it's important for everyone to get out. Memail at any time if you've got any other questions or just need someone's ear to chew off. You're going to have something crazy, wonderful, and very intense happening to you. :)
posted by smoke at 2:31 PM on February 4, 2012 [7 favorites]
Food you can eat with one hand.
If you are planning on/hoping for a vaginal birth, a really good stock of the most absorbent sanitary/maxi pads you can find. You will either need half a pack more than you have now, or half a pack less than you'll buy. You can't win. Also in this case, witch hazel and smaller pads to soak and freeze to layer in the larger pads, for healing down there.
Water bottles, that you can open with one hand or your teeth, to keep full and cold and handy.
If you have a dog, and people ask what they can do to help, tell them to swing by and take the dog for a walk. A nice long one that will leave the dog tired. If you have a back yard you can let the dog out in, a pooper scooper service. We had that, and it was so wonderful (because it was a snowy winter for us) I got teary every week, watching that guy do his job in fifteen minutes for a mere $11.
A dimmer switch in the bathroom.
Learn how to turn your phone's ringer off, if you still have a land line. Some babies will sleep through anything - some won't - but it's the adult's naps you don't want to disturb.
A sign to put on the door for when everyone's napping telling them not to knock/ring the bell, especially if you have a barking dog. It's been almost eight years, and I still don't regret chasing those witnesses down the street with my crying baby telling them "You woke her up, with your bloody persistent knocking, YOU get her back to sleep!"
posted by peagood at 2:33 PM on February 4, 2012 [1 favorite]
If you are planning on/hoping for a vaginal birth, a really good stock of the most absorbent sanitary/maxi pads you can find. You will either need half a pack more than you have now, or half a pack less than you'll buy. You can't win. Also in this case, witch hazel and smaller pads to soak and freeze to layer in the larger pads, for healing down there.
Water bottles, that you can open with one hand or your teeth, to keep full and cold and handy.
If you have a dog, and people ask what they can do to help, tell them to swing by and take the dog for a walk. A nice long one that will leave the dog tired. If you have a back yard you can let the dog out in, a pooper scooper service. We had that, and it was so wonderful (because it was a snowy winter for us) I got teary every week, watching that guy do his job in fifteen minutes for a mere $11.
A dimmer switch in the bathroom.
Learn how to turn your phone's ringer off, if you still have a land line. Some babies will sleep through anything - some won't - but it's the adult's naps you don't want to disturb.
A sign to put on the door for when everyone's napping telling them not to knock/ring the bell, especially if you have a barking dog. It's been almost eight years, and I still don't regret chasing those witnesses down the street with my crying baby telling them "You woke her up, with your bloody persistent knocking, YOU get her back to sleep!"
posted by peagood at 2:33 PM on February 4, 2012 [1 favorite]
Have about 30 burp rags. Or more.
Velcro swaddling blankets.
Those soothie gel for breastfeeding mama to put on her nipples.
posted by bq at 2:50 PM on February 4, 2012
Velcro swaddling blankets.
Those soothie gel for breastfeeding mama to put on her nipples.
posted by bq at 2:50 PM on February 4, 2012
Oh! I have another suggestion, which isn't about what you need in the first few days, but about what you should do:
Keep the tags on gifts, even and especially on clothing, until you're sure the clothes fit and you're going to use them.
We got a lot of newborn baby clothes as gifts, especially for the shower, which I dutifully washed in gentle detergent as we're told to do; and I had them lovingly folded and put away. Our baby was big, and fit none of the 0-3 month sizes. And she was out of the 6 months sizes before she could do a rotation of everything, since some of those were for the wrong season when they'd fit her. Some we soon learned we hated - they had snaps down the back, which were impossible until she could put her head up. The sleepers with many many snaps all along the legs were a nightmare to change in the middle of the night, and we hated them and cursed them. They got worn once, and if it was a gift we'd snap a quick picture of her in it and send it with a thanks, then the item was donated. She also looked terrible in yellow, due to a little jaundice, but that was just me being picky.
As well, we received duplicates of quite a few things - five copies of "Goodnight Moon" and people thought it was cute to package gifts in bathtubs and stuff. What we couldn't return, we kept new to "re-gift" other friends with newborns or donated to the nearby shelter.
I also learned to keep things to be returned in the trunk, along with the receipts. Some days I just happened to be near a far-flung store, and it worked out that I could go in and exchange something like a spare bathtub for diapers that I needed more. Some days she'd only sleep if I drove her around in the car, and that would give me a destination and a place to wander around with her for a bit on a winter afternoon.
And those little nightgowns with the elastic bottoms are the easiest thing ever for middle of the night changes.
posted by peagood at 2:51 PM on February 4, 2012 [1 favorite]
Keep the tags on gifts, even and especially on clothing, until you're sure the clothes fit and you're going to use them.
We got a lot of newborn baby clothes as gifts, especially for the shower, which I dutifully washed in gentle detergent as we're told to do; and I had them lovingly folded and put away. Our baby was big, and fit none of the 0-3 month sizes. And she was out of the 6 months sizes before she could do a rotation of everything, since some of those were for the wrong season when they'd fit her. Some we soon learned we hated - they had snaps down the back, which were impossible until she could put her head up. The sleepers with many many snaps all along the legs were a nightmare to change in the middle of the night, and we hated them and cursed them. They got worn once, and if it was a gift we'd snap a quick picture of her in it and send it with a thanks, then the item was donated. She also looked terrible in yellow, due to a little jaundice, but that was just me being picky.
As well, we received duplicates of quite a few things - five copies of "Goodnight Moon" and people thought it was cute to package gifts in bathtubs and stuff. What we couldn't return, we kept new to "re-gift" other friends with newborns or donated to the nearby shelter.
I also learned to keep things to be returned in the trunk, along with the receipts. Some days I just happened to be near a far-flung store, and it worked out that I could go in and exchange something like a spare bathtub for diapers that I needed more. Some days she'd only sleep if I drove her around in the car, and that would give me a destination and a place to wander around with her for a bit on a winter afternoon.
And those little nightgowns with the elastic bottoms are the easiest thing ever for middle of the night changes.
posted by peagood at 2:51 PM on February 4, 2012 [1 favorite]
First time mom of a 6 month old here:
Things I wish I had on hand but had to get: Sitz bath and tylenol.
If you are planning on breast feeding, find out how much and what supplies are covered by your insurance, and how to get reimbursed if needed (such as a pump or lactation consultant).
Nthing have a large supply of any common household items you use - soap, cleanser, toilet paper etc. Order/reorder from Amazon waaay before you run out. We have prime and it is almost better than chocolate.
Things that were awesome: stack of menus from local restaurants that delivered, with a wad of cash. Freeze food that you like to eat that freezes well, such as chili or lasagna - this made no sense to me before we had a newborn in the house but it is SO SO HARD to find time and energy to cook. And I love to cook.
Things to do before baby - anything that you like to do that would be inappropriate to take a baby to - for us it was a formal dinner, movies and live theater. YMMV.
posted by cestmoi15 at 3:05 PM on February 4, 2012 [1 favorite]
Things I wish I had on hand but had to get: Sitz bath and tylenol.
If you are planning on breast feeding, find out how much and what supplies are covered by your insurance, and how to get reimbursed if needed (such as a pump or lactation consultant).
Nthing have a large supply of any common household items you use - soap, cleanser, toilet paper etc. Order/reorder from Amazon waaay before you run out. We have prime and it is almost better than chocolate.
Things that were awesome: stack of menus from local restaurants that delivered, with a wad of cash. Freeze food that you like to eat that freezes well, such as chili or lasagna - this made no sense to me before we had a newborn in the house but it is SO SO HARD to find time and energy to cook. And I love to cook.
Things to do before baby - anything that you like to do that would be inappropriate to take a baby to - for us it was a formal dinner, movies and live theater. YMMV.
posted by cestmoi15 at 3:05 PM on February 4, 2012 [1 favorite]
Bourbon.
posted by Thorzdad at 4:06 PM on February 4, 2012 [2 favorites]
posted by Thorzdad at 4:06 PM on February 4, 2012 [2 favorites]
First-time father of an almost two-month-old here. I have a few suggestions for things that you can do for yourself or, at least, for your baby that will keep you losing your mind.
You want several Woombies or a similar velcro/zippered wraps. Also, a source of white noise, such as the "White Noise" app available for various mobile operating systems, with a device to play it on. Most newborns sleep much better swaddled tight, listening to white noise, but finding that all of the wraps are spat-up on or that your iPhone is out of batteries might be enough to drive you over the edge.
You are going to need to be able to have low lights at night, so that you can do things (get undressed, climb into bed, change and feed Baby Betelgeuse, etc.) without waking him up. The alternative is y'all stumbling around in the dark, which is no fun. If the baby will be sleeping in your bedroom, you're quite likely going to want a dim light in there, because you're liable to wake up often in the first few weeks and want to check on him. In our case, we found we could turn on our closet light and just crack the door a little.
If you'll be breastfeeding then at first you're likely to want to keep track of how often he's eating and how long he's eating. This means having some method of knowing the time in the spot where you'll be doing most of the baby-feeding. We got a cheap little digital alarm clock and put that next to the glider.
Having both an iPad and an iPhone and a Netflix account has been great—I recommend this very highly. When I have to spend twenty minutes rocking him and shushing him, rather than being bored or frustrated out of my mind, I can watch an episode of a TV show on my device. (If I'm lucky, I can do this on the couch, in front of the TV, but that's rarely panned out.
Finally, nthing the importance of getting your house cleaned and stocked up. Clean the toilets, mop the floors, get everything put away, get lots of healthful foods in the fridge, etc. Today I cleaned the house for the first time since Henry came along on December 9—vacuumed, mopped, scrubbed the bathroom floors, etc. (My wife and I assumed the nesting instinct would kick in shortly before the kid was born, and she'd clean the house then. It never happened.)
posted by waldo at 4:07 PM on February 4, 2012 [2 favorites]
You want several Woombies or a similar velcro/zippered wraps. Also, a source of white noise, such as the "White Noise" app available for various mobile operating systems, with a device to play it on. Most newborns sleep much better swaddled tight, listening to white noise, but finding that all of the wraps are spat-up on or that your iPhone is out of batteries might be enough to drive you over the edge.
You are going to need to be able to have low lights at night, so that you can do things (get undressed, climb into bed, change and feed Baby Betelgeuse, etc.) without waking him up. The alternative is y'all stumbling around in the dark, which is no fun. If the baby will be sleeping in your bedroom, you're quite likely going to want a dim light in there, because you're liable to wake up often in the first few weeks and want to check on him. In our case, we found we could turn on our closet light and just crack the door a little.
If you'll be breastfeeding then at first you're likely to want to keep track of how often he's eating and how long he's eating. This means having some method of knowing the time in the spot where you'll be doing most of the baby-feeding. We got a cheap little digital alarm clock and put that next to the glider.
Having both an iPad and an iPhone and a Netflix account has been great—I recommend this very highly. When I have to spend twenty minutes rocking him and shushing him, rather than being bored or frustrated out of my mind, I can watch an episode of a TV show on my device. (If I'm lucky, I can do this on the couch, in front of the TV, but that's rarely panned out.
Finally, nthing the importance of getting your house cleaned and stocked up. Clean the toilets, mop the floors, get everything put away, get lots of healthful foods in the fridge, etc. Today I cleaned the house for the first time since Henry came along on December 9—vacuumed, mopped, scrubbed the bathroom floors, etc. (My wife and I assumed the nesting instinct would kick in shortly before the kid was born, and she'd clean the house then. It never happened.)
posted by waldo at 4:07 PM on February 4, 2012 [2 favorites]
First time mom of an 8 month old here. We just went to the movies for the first time since being pregnant last week. And it was day date no less; we don't go out at night.
Okay, take your own motrin and preparation H to the hospital. Trust me. No sense in waiting 3 hours between when you request it and when the nurses bring it to you.
Lots of toilet paper at home.
Water bottles in every room.
Frozen meals and one handed snacks. Lots of them. Breast-feeding makes you hungry, like NOW, and you've only got a little while to yourself before the baby wants to be fed again.
People always want to know how many diapers they will need. We used 7 or 8 packs (40-count) of newborn size before we moved to size 1.
Pro-tip: someone mentioned white noise above. I sleep with the monitor next to my head. Without really thinking about it, I chose to get my kid used to sleeping with relaxation music that I like. THANK GOD. No way would I be able to sleep listening to hissing white noise all night long.
I lived and died by my smartphone for the first 4 months or so. When you are stuck breast-feeding, you don't have time to get on the computer. It was especially helpful when I had panicky new-mom questions in the middle of the night - I could email my other new mom friends at 1am for instance, and have an answer at 4am, because they had all been up breast-feeding too. Or of course check with Dr. Google .
One more thing I learned - whatever the baby is doing today that is freaking me out, he won't be doing it 3 or 4 days from now, so don't get too worried.
Congratulations!
posted by vignettist at 4:32 PM on February 4, 2012 [2 favorites]
Okay, take your own motrin and preparation H to the hospital. Trust me. No sense in waiting 3 hours between when you request it and when the nurses bring it to you.
Lots of toilet paper at home.
Water bottles in every room.
Frozen meals and one handed snacks. Lots of them. Breast-feeding makes you hungry, like NOW, and you've only got a little while to yourself before the baby wants to be fed again.
People always want to know how many diapers they will need. We used 7 or 8 packs (40-count) of newborn size before we moved to size 1.
Pro-tip: someone mentioned white noise above. I sleep with the monitor next to my head. Without really thinking about it, I chose to get my kid used to sleeping with relaxation music that I like. THANK GOD. No way would I be able to sleep listening to hissing white noise all night long.
I lived and died by my smartphone for the first 4 months or so. When you are stuck breast-feeding, you don't have time to get on the computer. It was especially helpful when I had panicky new-mom questions in the middle of the night - I could email my other new mom friends at 1am for instance, and have an answer at 4am, because they had all been up breast-feeding too. Or of course check with Dr. Google .
One more thing I learned - whatever the baby is doing today that is freaking me out, he won't be doing it 3 or 4 days from now, so don't get too worried.
Congratulations!
posted by vignettist at 4:32 PM on February 4, 2012 [2 favorites]
Have about 30 burp rags. Or more.
We bought a set of nice cloth diapers (I think from diaperco? some online site). We didn't end up using them as cloth diapers, but they've been invaluable to have around for all your absorbency needs:
--on the changing table pad, so that when you get a little pee or poop where you don't expect it, you just swap out the diaper
-- as burp cloths to drape over everything
--as absorbers, for when the bed/couch/rug gets peed on (ok, this is for later, but still)
etc.
Oh, and Oxiclean. This stuff is magic on organic stains: blood, poop, pee, poop, spit-up, did i mention poop? Just make a strong solution and let it sit for a couple of days (we've got a dishpan that lives in a utility sink next to the washing machine---we're potty training still).
posted by leahwrenn at 5:14 PM on February 4, 2012 [1 favorite]
We bought a set of nice cloth diapers (I think from diaperco? some online site). We didn't end up using them as cloth diapers, but they've been invaluable to have around for all your absorbency needs:
--on the changing table pad, so that when you get a little pee or poop where you don't expect it, you just swap out the diaper
-- as burp cloths to drape over everything
--as absorbers, for when the bed/couch/rug gets peed on (ok, this is for later, but still)
etc.
Oh, and Oxiclean. This stuff is magic on organic stains: blood, poop, pee, poop, spit-up, did i mention poop? Just make a strong solution and let it sit for a couple of days (we've got a dishpan that lives in a utility sink next to the washing machine---we're potty training still).
posted by leahwrenn at 5:14 PM on February 4, 2012 [1 favorite]
+1 to cloth diapers as burp rags, they work great. I'll put in a controversial vote for what also works great. ZBP. Zero Binky Policy. Maybe we're lucky, but we just never bought into the fooler sucker. Our daughters both have birthdays this month, they'll be 10 & 8. Great students, they get along great, it's been a real easy ride so far. I'm not saying you should think no binky now equals no problems later but you will get some great laughs along the way when other parents lose their coveted binkies on escalators, etc.
posted by Rafaelloello at 5:33 PM on February 4, 2012
posted by Rafaelloello at 5:33 PM on February 4, 2012
Rafaelloello's advice is a prime example of the sort of stuff smoke mentioned that you should learn to shrug off. We started off wanting no dummy for our minion, until day 3 in the hospital when she just. wouldn't. settle. and the pead suggested we try it.
It worked. Ours is a sucky baby. At the end of the day, you do what you need to do for you and your child to both survive until the end of the day.
Definitely go out for a quiet meal and a movie before d-day.
Do give serious considering to baby-wearing. A simple sling can make life so much easier, particularly in the early months - simply being able to do a load of washing whilst kiddo snoozes in the sling/carrier makes a world of difference.
If you're breastfeeding and want to express, get the best pump you can afford. Ignore the cheap electric ones (we had one. useless) and just go for the name-brand expensive stuff. The difference is immense (think 15 minutes to pump instead of an hour). Also, consider expressing if you've not already. Build up a stockpile of frozen boobjuice so Mum can have a bunch of sleep uninterrupted by feeding. Or hell, so someone can babysit.
But. To answer your actual question - go out now, do what you like to do. It may well be months or years before you can do it again.
posted by coriolisdave at 6:48 PM on February 4, 2012 [5 favorites]
It worked. Ours is a sucky baby. At the end of the day, you do what you need to do for you and your child to both survive until the end of the day.
Definitely go out for a quiet meal and a movie before d-day.
Do give serious considering to baby-wearing. A simple sling can make life so much easier, particularly in the early months - simply being able to do a load of washing whilst kiddo snoozes in the sling/carrier makes a world of difference.
If you're breastfeeding and want to express, get the best pump you can afford. Ignore the cheap electric ones (we had one. useless) and just go for the name-brand expensive stuff. The difference is immense (think 15 minutes to pump instead of an hour). Also, consider expressing if you've not already. Build up a stockpile of frozen boobjuice so Mum can have a bunch of sleep uninterrupted by feeding. Or hell, so someone can babysit.
But. To answer your actual question - go out now, do what you like to do. It may well be months or years before you can do it again.
posted by coriolisdave at 6:48 PM on February 4, 2012 [5 favorites]
Buy at least one pack of diapers in size N, 1, and 2 NOW. That way when you realize two months from now (or whenever) that the baby is just, wham out of nowhere, too big for the size you were using, you don't have to run to the store to get an emergency pack of the next size up.
posted by daisystomper at 12:45 AM on February 5, 2012 [1 favorite]
posted by daisystomper at 12:45 AM on February 5, 2012 [1 favorite]
Slight variation on the water bottle thing: we took home the giant mugs (we had a couple false starts on our first) that they use in the hospital. You can use covered a mug with a straw with one hand, some water-bottles you can't. We found three was about the right amount, one always in the fridge, one with the person, and the extra wherever it happened to end up.
There were some big differences between what we needed for after two births (the first was MUCH harder than the second), however one of the best things we got was a bottle of unscented lotion (both of the kids have\had sensitive skin). Put nightlights anywhere between your room and where the kid sleeps\gets it's diapers changed (we did both in our room to start with) and your room and the nearest bathroom.
Have the discussions about who does what NOW. I'm not saying that every little chore needs to be assigned, but it was sure nice to know "oh baby's awake, I get, change, then give to Wife" and NOT have the discussion who has to get up this time. Oh, and don't feel guilty if you start making up little errands to run (hopefully like 30-min. to an hour). Make sure each half gets time to themselves.
If you're in the home stretch, don't worry too much about freezer meals\getting things perfect. This is the last chance you're going to get to relax in longer stretches in several months. You're going to be stressed out and tired no matter how prepared you are, so for now relax. Later, accept food\help from EVERYBODY.
posted by Gygesringtone at 8:05 AM on February 5, 2012
There were some big differences between what we needed for after two births (the first was MUCH harder than the second), however one of the best things we got was a bottle of unscented lotion (both of the kids have\had sensitive skin). Put nightlights anywhere between your room and where the kid sleeps\gets it's diapers changed (we did both in our room to start with) and your room and the nearest bathroom.
Have the discussions about who does what NOW. I'm not saying that every little chore needs to be assigned, but it was sure nice to know "oh baby's awake, I get, change, then give to Wife" and NOT have the discussion who has to get up this time. Oh, and don't feel guilty if you start making up little errands to run (hopefully like 30-min. to an hour). Make sure each half gets time to themselves.
If you're in the home stretch, don't worry too much about freezer meals\getting things perfect. This is the last chance you're going to get to relax in longer stretches in several months. You're going to be stressed out and tired no matter how prepared you are, so for now relax. Later, accept food\help from EVERYBODY.
posted by Gygesringtone at 8:05 AM on February 5, 2012
Right before the baby came, I cut up a couple of receiving blankets into wipe-size and zigzag-sewed the edges. Wasn't sure we'd use them but they're useful for everything. We have stacks next to every chair in the house. Probably the best thing I did out of all my last-days prep.
I also pulled all the recipes out of my cookbook that are easy to make and put them in one pile, picked out about six and wrote up a grocery list that anyone helpful could follow, had a month of stocked food, and made a list of books to read. I froze batches of muffins, cookies, and granola bars. We stocked up games on the ipad and iphone (I am becoming an expert at runemaster), and my husband played one last video game and watched football games with teams we don't even like. We went out to eat every night the baby was overdue. We practiced "not sweating small stuff," "letting things go," "not being a perfectionist," and "letting other people help."
One thing I wish I'd prepped for myself before baby - figuring out what clothing to nurse in, if you're doing that. Covers suck when you need to see the baby's latch, which might take a few weeks to perfect. Because I wasn't prepared on this, for the last month I've only been able to go to breastfeeding-friendly places. Also, newborns can spend almost all their waking time attached to your nipple, so if you wind up with a baby like ours, it's not like you can feed them in the car and then have an hour to try on clothes.
The other thing I wish I'd done before baby is get a sling carrier that can hold a newborn. Carriers might seem like a baby thing, but no, they're really for the parents if you wind up with one of those babies that doesn't like to be put down and you wind up having a parenting style where you don't want to force it until they're a little older.
Extra advice for post baby - nursing can be difficult. For me, it was harder than the birth was, and we didn't have the perfect easy birth. We would have had a mentally smoother time had we known how hard it can be. There's a ton of support, you can tie in with it now, and lactation consultants and breastfeeding-educated pediatricians are worth their fees.
posted by arabelladragon at 9:12 AM on February 5, 2012
I also pulled all the recipes out of my cookbook that are easy to make and put them in one pile, picked out about six and wrote up a grocery list that anyone helpful could follow, had a month of stocked food, and made a list of books to read. I froze batches of muffins, cookies, and granola bars. We stocked up games on the ipad and iphone (I am becoming an expert at runemaster), and my husband played one last video game and watched football games with teams we don't even like. We went out to eat every night the baby was overdue. We practiced "not sweating small stuff," "letting things go," "not being a perfectionist," and "letting other people help."
One thing I wish I'd prepped for myself before baby - figuring out what clothing to nurse in, if you're doing that. Covers suck when you need to see the baby's latch, which might take a few weeks to perfect. Because I wasn't prepared on this, for the last month I've only been able to go to breastfeeding-friendly places. Also, newborns can spend almost all their waking time attached to your nipple, so if you wind up with a baby like ours, it's not like you can feed them in the car and then have an hour to try on clothes.
The other thing I wish I'd done before baby is get a sling carrier that can hold a newborn. Carriers might seem like a baby thing, but no, they're really for the parents if you wind up with one of those babies that doesn't like to be put down and you wind up having a parenting style where you don't want to force it until they're a little older.
Extra advice for post baby - nursing can be difficult. For me, it was harder than the birth was, and we didn't have the perfect easy birth. We would have had a mentally smoother time had we known how hard it can be. There's a ton of support, you can tie in with it now, and lactation consultants and breastfeeding-educated pediatricians are worth their fees.
posted by arabelladragon at 9:12 AM on February 5, 2012
Contigo water bottle is great for nursing --- you press a button to drink, so it can't spill, even if you're horizontal. (Left mine behind while traveling and the next night dumped the whole contents of my make-do bottle over my head and sheets at 2am. Oops.)
No link because I am nursing my very fussy 4-month old to sleep right now and he'll wake if I try to use both hands on the iPad....
Nursing pillow. Sling/baby carrier. Both might let mom bring a nursing babe more easily to he dinner table (although if the sling is linen, take care not to use it as a napkin.)
Snacks, healthy but also treats for when you need a pick-me-up. Also tea!!!
Books or iPad or whatever in every place you might find yourself nursing. At least couch and bedroom.
posted by wyzewoman at 9:21 AM on February 5, 2012
No link because I am nursing my very fussy 4-month old to sleep right now and he'll wake if I try to use both hands on the iPad....
Nursing pillow. Sling/baby carrier. Both might let mom bring a nursing babe more easily to he dinner table (although if the sling is linen, take care not to use it as a napkin.)
Snacks, healthy but also treats for when you need a pick-me-up. Also tea!!!
Books or iPad or whatever in every place you might find yourself nursing. At least couch and bedroom.
posted by wyzewoman at 9:21 AM on February 5, 2012
Lots of supplies, whatever that means in your house. You want to minimize going shopping. There have been tons of "what do I need for a new baby" ask.mes. Get the minimum, and have a friend available to get stuff you decide you need. Lots of easy food available. There will be times when you have barely enough energy to open a can of beans or soup, and open some crackers.
posted by theora55 at 11:31 AM on February 5, 2012
posted by theora55 at 11:31 AM on February 5, 2012
Squares and rectangles of cloth! 8x8 inch flannel for wipes, bigger of anything absorbent for spitup (cloth diapers work well as others have suggested), big 45x45 inch soft cotton muslin for swaddling (squares work best for swaddles), 6 yards of cotton gauze for a baby carrying wrap -- all of these can be made by just zig zagging the raw edges. Totally easy. Totally useful. Totally impossible for me to shop and do the most basic sewing when I had a new baby. I was really annoyed by this. If you want to be slightly more ambitious, you could make a sling like the new native or hot sling style by making a tube with one curved seam.
posted by SandiBeech at 5:57 PM on February 6, 2012
posted by SandiBeech at 5:57 PM on February 6, 2012
First time mom of a six month old here. Frozen meals are great, but for us that was only because my husband's ability to cook dinner by himself is somewhat limited. If you live somewhere where you can get take out, that's just as good and sometimes better, because it means less dishes to do.
Line up some tv on dvd or punch up your streaming netflix list with some things that you have always wanted to watch but didn't have time for. We ended up watching a lot of dvds including commentary and all special features because you just spend SO much time sitting and nursing, cuddling, soothing baby.
If you are breast feeding, the one thing that no one told me and I think would have been helpful to know- everyone said it would hurt at first, no one told me that it would hurt for the first four to five weeks. I was at my wits end waiting for it to stop hurting. Buy those frozen gel packs and after almost every nursing session, fetch them for your wife after each feeding, they suck and if you hate cold it's even worse, but they really do help. Also Lansinoh applied often really helps, bring some to the hospital with you.
Do have a couple of different pacifiers on hand whether or not you "plan" to use them. Have them sterilized and ready to go. At four a.m. when you have barely had any sleep all day or night, you'll find that you are more than willing to throw the "plan" to the curb. Also, my attitude towards them is this- I can throw them away, if baby starts sucking his thumb, I can't throw that away. BTW- I didn't have to use them until baby was 4 weeks old and put off using them until then and that was on purpose and by the recommendation of my lactation consultant. I will say that I am glad I had them, because they were a life/sanity saver when we needed them.
As previously recommended, have at least one pack of size nb, 1 and 2 available. For us it took several poop explosions too make us realize that the solution was to go up a size in diapers.
Also, receiving blankets, the more the merrier. Drape them over at least two of the chairs in your living area and have a stack of clean ones to replace them with. They are great for burp cloths and barf cloths and just everything.
posted by citizngkar at 1:18 AM on February 7, 2012
Line up some tv on dvd or punch up your streaming netflix list with some things that you have always wanted to watch but didn't have time for. We ended up watching a lot of dvds including commentary and all special features because you just spend SO much time sitting and nursing, cuddling, soothing baby.
If you are breast feeding, the one thing that no one told me and I think would have been helpful to know- everyone said it would hurt at first, no one told me that it would hurt for the first four to five weeks. I was at my wits end waiting for it to stop hurting. Buy those frozen gel packs and after almost every nursing session, fetch them for your wife after each feeding, they suck and if you hate cold it's even worse, but they really do help. Also Lansinoh applied often really helps, bring some to the hospital with you.
Do have a couple of different pacifiers on hand whether or not you "plan" to use them. Have them sterilized and ready to go. At four a.m. when you have barely had any sleep all day or night, you'll find that you are more than willing to throw the "plan" to the curb. Also, my attitude towards them is this- I can throw them away, if baby starts sucking his thumb, I can't throw that away. BTW- I didn't have to use them until baby was 4 weeks old and put off using them until then and that was on purpose and by the recommendation of my lactation consultant. I will say that I am glad I had them, because they were a life/sanity saver when we needed them.
As previously recommended, have at least one pack of size nb, 1 and 2 available. For us it took several poop explosions too make us realize that the solution was to go up a size in diapers.
Also, receiving blankets, the more the merrier. Drape them over at least two of the chairs in your living area and have a stack of clean ones to replace them with. They are great for burp cloths and barf cloths and just everything.
posted by citizngkar at 1:18 AM on February 7, 2012
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by sacrifix at 1:39 PM on February 4, 2012 [2 favorites]